DOTW- Sardakaii

Page

Next Last

Ron

@ronshaan

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

Hello all.. and welcome !!!

This week Our topic of the week will be

**Sardakaii**

After watching Phir subah hogi we might Know lil bit about this thing..

so every one ... let's discuss this

1. what is sardakaii?

2. did u ever hear about such thing b4 watching phir subah hogi ?

3. did u understand this idea from the show .. mean did the show tell u about it the way they promised us ??

4. what do u think about such thing .. do u agree to it or feel that it should be stopped

5. Sugni's sardakaii

6. Champa's sardakaii

7. Gulabiya's sardakaii

8. Thakur's doing sardakaii of behdni's

9. do u think any girl will do her own sardakaii like sugni did ??

AND SO ON ...

IF u have more points do add them

so what are u waiting for

Let's disscuss -SARDAKAII-

The main issue Phir subah hogi had to deal with !!!

Edited by ronshaan - 12 years ago

Quote

Frequent Posters

Vinnie79

@Vinnie79

Rocker

Posted: 12 years ago

Good post ,
I feel that the practice of Sardakhi was not clearly explained in PSH , for they contradicted themselves. In the beginning they said that if a Thakur likes a particulat bedni he puts the veil on her head indicating that she was his.
Then when Sugni announced hers, there was a bidding process, where she would go to the highest bidder. Now since she ,Vickram , Adi and Gulabiya maintained she would not have gone with Vickram if he had done it...dose that mean the bedni had to consent to it? , some how that made it feel as though the bedni had more power that the women who rmoved thier slippers simply because a Thakur /thakurine stood in front of her.
I will say watching the ritual while sugni was dong it, for me that was disheartning and really crue to to that to a woman., and as i said before i can't believe she opted to do that to herself!.

Quote

Looks like you are new here. Register for free, learn and contribute.

Julie

@JulieD

Voyager

Posted: 12 years ago

Agree with Vinnie that PSH contradicted themselves.

I think that it is a very cruel practice and before PSH I did not know of it. It is very scary and sad to know that must actually still happen in parts of the world. It makes me so thankful to be born in the country that I was born in.

I wish that something could be done to totally eradicate that practice but sad to say that somewhere along the way some people will still be trapped in it.

The CVs started of the show in a good way that made people aware of the practices. Until they made Sugni announce her own sardakai. To me it just belittled the true sufferings of what bednis actually go through on a daily basis. At one point I remember myself saying that these bednis are actually the cruel ones. That they deserved to be ill-treated.

The Cvs really messed up. Sugni had absolutely no reason whatso ever to agree to sardakai.

Now that the show is over, I can actually feel sad for the bednis again and wish that somehow the bednis of real life can be helped.

Quote

Ron

@ronshaan

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

I found this info in our forum

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/phir-subah-hogi/3140930/sar-dhakai

posted by - Saviosaraff

Basically the Sardhakai ritual is when a Thakur chooses a girl to be his official mistress. It is somewhat like a wedding ritual but there are no pheras taken. The girl gets to wear sindoor and a mangalsutra but that is it. Once girls start to do Raai, they can only get Sardhakai done and can never marry as per the traditions." 'Rai and Sar Dhakai are actually prostitution' But what sets this community apart is that the men of this community don't do any work. The community has certain old customs, associated with the dance form that the girls have to abide by.

Their life is one of dancing and prostitution and they go with any Thakur who can pay the price for the night. Otherwise how will she support her family through the years?

Sardhakai is more like the ritual of first night...when a young Bedni starts out in this "profession" the Thakur who pays the biggest amount gets to spend first night with her. Its the price of her innocence! Once her innocence is gone, she can be used by any Thakur who can pay her price.

Sexual Service : in the name of Sardakhai, prostitution is legalised in the community. That legalization happens through application of Sindoor and all paraphernalia.

The men in the Bedni tribe can marry only outside their community. A child born from this marriage is considered chaste and they are desirable than the children born from the Bedni-Thakur union. The Bednis cannot marry.

Once sardhakai is done, officially, the women cannot engage in sexual services to other men until relieved by her patron.

Until she is the mistress, she can live with the Thakur in his own premises where he resides or where he decides to put her up.
She can continue to do Raai dance and earn income from it.
Once relieved, she can go back to her community.

4. If there are any children born to this young woman they do not get to have their father's name

Quote

Ron

@ronshaan

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

reading this info I shared

one thing i found here

The men in the Bedni tribe can marry only outside their community.

that means the thakurs were so smart to not alowed ladies to marry in their community else who will do her own sardakaii... No marriage so they will have 2 do sardakaii and sell her self !!!

any ways my views on this thing is that the thakurs were very smart they wanted that all ladies will belong to them they do not allow the males to marry any lady in their village and do not let them work

None of those man dare to work or go out to find any work .. we can take for exmple - Hukum and katari .. Both never tried to do some thing - they were used to and when sugni was sold what they did with the money ?? Nothing but wasted it on their desires

sugni sold her self was the cheapest thing to do..

I found Julie's story better

when a girl is forced to do it .. we can understand her

in that place this is the thing - they force their girls to do it

but here .. sugni .. chose this and did her own sardakaii

I will post the pics of it in my posts soon

Sugni's sardakaii was the biggest joke in Phir subah hogi

what did they do ???

made those ladies a cheap ??

showed that they will to sell their body???

Yes she was hurt yes

but .. this is not the way to deal with the pain

Ok vikram hurt u ..

why u hurt your mom ??? why ??

was it the end of the world ??

she could leave that place and move on

Ok vikram hurt u yes .. what about your mother who was there for u ... any ways ...this was the downfall of Phir subah hogi

I could understand Gulabiya's sardakaii was done and could feel sorry for her .. I sow how jwala's wife behaved with her I felt so sorry for gulabiya but after sugni's sardakaii and the hell both mother and daughter gave to vikram i felt .. Great this way Gulabiya had to b

this way .. call her cheap and behave like she is dirty!

Quote

payal7

@payal7

Dazzler

Posted: 12 years ago

Interesting topic for discussion Ronit.

The information you have posted is what I understood of this practice.

To my mind this is one of the most cruel activites being practiced in the name of tradition. To make someone/family vunerable and then take advantage of that situation (although is not new) is still disgusting.

1. No girl would sell herself unless there were no other options. Certainly not the Sugni who we were introduced to at the beginning of the show.

2. More importantly, no mother would stand by and let her daughter sell herself and become a protitute. Certainly not a mother who fought soo hard to prevent her daughter bein blindsided into being a mistress.

3. This practice is about earning money to support a family. So what was the purpose of showing all celebrations etc as if this was a wedding. Why would a family waste money on such pomp and ceremony instead of saving it as they never knew how much money will com into the house in the future

4. Why was Sugni shown dressed as if she was a newly married bride?

5. How was Gulabia and Sugni herself able to prevent TVS from doing her sardhakai?

PHS was good in terms of bringing this horrible practice to the attention of the nation but then made a mockery of it.

Some of the actions above and Sugni's subsequent actions suggested that these women had power.In doing so it belittled the plight of these women😡

I have said before and I say it again, for a show that was written by women, trying to show the plight of women who are marginalised they showed women in the most negative way possible. Not one woman in this show was depicted as a decent human being let along a decent woman.

PS. Ronit please don't post any photos as they really brings back bad memories.

Edited by payal7 - 12 years ago

Quote

Ron

@ronshaan

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

Okay payal .. I wont post the photos and agreed with u did u see what they did with the money Hukum and kathari wasted it ... and the house was turned in to 2 homes .. gulabiya was HAPPY .. that was irritated me .. sugni came home that too HAPPY .. what did she do .. did she marry .. was it a happy thing .. should she be happy doing so ... Those things made me more angry at PSH !

Quote

Ron

@ronshaan

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

In the real world .. there is other type of sardakaii .. a woman be sold but they are sold against their will.. they never wanted to live such life and be this way even the girl who is the most hurted person in the world wont go out and sell her self... in this real world if we are hurt by the most loved person we do not go and sell our self we go and do something else to show the other person I can continue my life without U .. so sugni's selling her self - 4me was unreal - i guess a male wrote such thing - thinking a behdni would do that - but wait - we are talking about sugni who is Not like that... - even any behdni who knows that this is going to come wont go out and sell her self so I guess this action was taken to Rise the TRP (which was good 2.7 at those weeks)
in the way sugni sold her self.. they made a behdni not look a victim she looked the one who use a thakur ... but is it the real thing ???

Quote

Ron

@ronshaan

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

i guess they should have shown champa's sardakaii instead of sugni's at the starting of the show without the rape drama and show sugni fighting for her but they ruined it and showed all fake drama of the reva manzil

there was One show Named - **Agle Janam mohe bitiya hi kijo** THE story idea was bit same but better and a great story with good start and end idea was same -they were selling girls ... they started with selling the girl's friend all of those people were poor and were forced into selling their girls 1st was her friend who got sold when she heard that she is being sold she tried to kill her self but was saved by Lali who was main lead she saved her (without knowing why she tried to kill her self) but they sold that girl and Lali found out about it later On and then it was Lali's turn she had sisters and brother and they made her parents to sell her they showed how they fought to save her but could not because they were very poor and were forced to sell her so they sold her with a lie of her husband will come and accept her (Lali was married in a very young age so they said her husband and calling u) all the show she was stuggling and fighting for her rights

this was the best show ever they used the idea very well and i loved the story I FELT PSH will be the same great story but they ruined it

Edited by ronshaan - 12 years ago

Quote

payal7

@payal7

Dazzler

Posted: 12 years ago

#10

I agree with you they should never have shown Sugni doing her own Sardhakai. What they should have shown is her moving away and with great determination coping with her broken heart and making something of herself.

When they introduced the story of G going to perform Rai as one of the national dances I thought the makers finally woken up realised the fiasco of Reva menzil plot and were using this as a way out for Sugni ie. G would do the dance. Sugni would go with her and for one reason or another Sugni would do the dance and slowly get recongition and with it the ability to support her family.

I think they still could have salvaged the show upto the point of where TVS walked away. Because at that point they could have all gone there separate ways.

They could have then bought in Champa's sardhakai something her Mama forced her into when her mother died (she did have a mother at the start of the show!!!!!) with Sugni fighting it!!!!!

Actually I would have preferred if they had shown a grown up version of the show where TVS on finding Reva alive - explaining things to Sugni, explain his desire to marry her, his intention to divorce Reva irrespective what she decided but also pointing out that if their society was against their marriage before it will be 100 time worse so she had to be sure she could do with so she had to make a decision.

Sugni deciding to go away etc...

in my humble opinion that would have been far more interesting then the crap we were shown.

Edited by payal7 - 12 years ago