She has to accept to, be accepted..

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Sunara

@princessunara

Trailblazer

+ 8

Posted: 12 years ago

Chhanchhan as a person is like many of us have noticed quite close to Sanaya. Actually why i started it this way is cz Sanaya also gives us many reasons to learn things from her right?
Ya another similarity...

We younger generation is sometimes so stubborn that we see black and white in things and refuse to see the grey..
ya me included..for me also 'men-women' and their place in society is a huge issue..i think my first fight over this happened when I was a mere 13 year old.. I was practicing kick boxing (was a tom boy to boot then) using my younger bro as a height marker...n my paternal grand parents gave me a lecture on how girls' should not aim the foot at a man.. and i wrecked havoc literally, enough for my mom to lay down a rule to my paternal grand parents that in our home only the fact that I was elder than my brother would count when giving respect..and so u can guess how hard core believer of this i might be..

And i have a feeling CC is exactly like this..

but what she taught me over these episodes is this.. we might believe in something, and intelligently too we might know we are correct and the other person is wrong in his/her belief..
but give and take is part of life..

you do not have to change ur own beliefs, but for peace of existence you can change urself a little bit..specially for the sake of the people you care about..
see men leaving dirty plats for a woman to wash 'just cz she was a woman and he was a man' would have gotten me hopping mad (brought up in a household where mom would give a whack if any of us left a dirty plate without washing it with our own hands the moment we finish eating) but she for the moment did not make a fuss..
Knowing what to talk and make an issue about at a certain moment..when to bide time...when to tolerate things for the time being and being patient instead of confronting straight away as the first instinct that comes..she taught me this too..
she believes this is wrong and eventually she will indeed tackle this..but right now she is intelligent enough to pick her battles..

See she does not believe in sari and pallu or clothes giving respect.. but for their happiness she gave in..
And thus she made a loved one happy (babuji) by respecting his POV. And in return when the moment came he respected her POV and allowed her to not wear a sari...

this is the lesson CC taught me 'argument may win the situation but lose the person' but sometimes seeing things from 2 side and bending a little would go a long way towards solving things..

thus my title to this post 'to be accepted, you have to accept'

For her POV to be eventually accepted, she first did things their way..But was rewarded for bending a little...

This show teaches us little things through such normal situations.. and i guess its doing a pretty good job when someone as stubborn as myself do feel the importance of the above said things...

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Frequent Posters

DiyaS

@DiyaS

Stunner

+ 7

Posted: 12 years ago

Another great post, Sunara!!! We had this discussion over Manav and the pallu and the saree just a couple of days ago, remember ? 😆

Another thing to remember is ... you have to give respect in order to get respect. Respect can never be demanded, it has to be commanded.

Chhanchhan said clearly that for her, wearing a saree is not a mark of respect ... but for people in the house, it is ... so she will do it. She will respect the rules of the family.
And when the rules threaten to be dangerous ... the rules were withdrawn for her ... she as a person is more important than the rules ... she has already started earning the respect of the family ... especially Babuji ... She respected them, they respected her in return.

My mom always told me ... if something doesn't hurt you, and it pleases someone, there is no harm in doing it ... like wearing Indian clothes in front of some particularly conservative elders in the family. It pleases them, it doesn't hurt me ... so I do it. However if an elder asks me to give up my work, then I will not do so. One has to learn where one can hold firm, and where it is sometimes better to give in a little.

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Naadhira Khan

@naadhira_khan

Navigator

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

great post...I feel the same way.. CC has thought me a lot when it comes to hander ling situations...there were many scenes in which I expected her to get angry and throw a fit ( because that's what I would have done)but she remained calm and did not start an argument...the one think I learnt is that there is a time and place for everything and you can't expect people or traditions to change immediately you have to exercise patience they will slowly come around at the end of the day right always wins over wrong.

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notacrimetolove

@notacrimetolove

Voyager

Posted: 12 years ago

Nice post, I agree, to be accepted, she has to accept as well. Relationships work both ways and to if you want people to accept your views and thoughts and ways then you have to accept some of theirs as well and learn to compromise somewhat. If you try to understand and accept some of there ways and thoughts then they will try to accept and understand some of your ways and thoughts as well.

Since Chhan Chhan is compromising and despite it not being what she necessarily wants, she is doing it to make them happy (wearing a saree) and by making them happy she is starting to win family members over and hopefully since shes bending over slightly to make them happy, hopefully they'll do the same.

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MadhuO

@MadhuO

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

@ princessunara...Very well said. 👍🏼

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She has to accept to, be accepted..

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