Asad Zoya nd Stream of emotions

While taking a smooth sip of a fragrant choco capucchino with whippd choclate crust, n feeling the foam adjoining its miniscus at the ends, i thought of seperating up the foam n i sipped it ol up, leaving the plain chocolate drink without its foam, n then had a sip of it again, it wasnt same, nt the same texture nor the same lip-licking taste..
Strange! Isnt it? A loamy Foam, a lifeless, tastles foam completes a drink. N when seperatd, even choclate loses its taste,

so i twirld m mug again, n there u hv ur foam bck, strange ya! No matter hw hard u try, the cmplementaries never get seperated, they just seemd to b,
they exist 2getha, n decline 2getha.
n everythng has its complementary, lyf n death, paris n romance, eiffel n beauty, white n black, broch n the pin... Endless...

I was staring at my mug blankly, i tracd its edges, plated its orifice.
Smiling to mself. N then liftd m face towards the endless infinity.

Years bck, i usd to be infinity, n i thot, cn cmplementary-ity be d reasn of declination of infinitnes eva?
Cmplementary-ity is luv, n luv is d infinity, so hw do we actualy bcm so limitd?

Eventualy, on m path of bcming hollow each day, on d verge of punishng mself on d daily basis, wheneva i crush m heart it keeps on askng me- bfr punishng me cn u answer me Where am i wrng? Am i wrng bcz i dnt hv eyes n i'm blind? Am i wrng bcz ths wrld wrks on eyes? Am i wrng bcz i'm independent n u r limited? Am i wrng bcz i dnt hv demands of luv? Am i wrng bcz i dnt hv cmplains regardng d persn's flaws? Am i wrng bcz the distances of miles no mre affects me? Am i wrng bcz i'm with sm1 else? Am i wrng bcz i go restless while caring for the persn i belong 2?...
I had no answer.
M lips were sealed.

M heart sobd n smild faintly, n said- u knw wat, senses needs affinity n closenes, nt me. Senses needs cnvo- n- dialogues nt me, i'm infinite n so y luv resides in me, cz i beat on a single rhythm throughout lyf. So y i rest in the centre. Cz i acpt u with ur flaws.

N i liftd m mug again flng the same lather n aroma..

When u knockd my door.. I thought I cn live again..I tried to make u stay again..wishing hard..u wud..cz u did said smday..tht u need mee.. I felt that voice..I felt that flng.. which I never wanted to root in me.. but u came..u did.. n nw.. U want me uproot it again..Just once wanna lock the door of my life again..the way I did before.,And ths time I wnt through the key outside..I will lock my door and will burn the key..And the lock behind will see its key burning..in the fire of my wishThe lock will seperate me frm u..the way I became the the lock between that lock nd it's keyAnd then the smoke will grow harder.. n I pomise I won't scream..I won't give u a mere chance to have me backAnd I will live , breath the smoke..as the fire will grow around..burning me in it.. A fire inside me will burn my wishes..And a fire around me will burn my skin...and the lock will burn in that fire tooMe n that lock with it's key will burn together behind that doorbt look..even the lock has a better fate..thn I haveit is burning with it's key..But I'm burning..with my loneliness...And with that burning skin of mine..I asked that god Do I wish a lot? Why cn't I wishn he answered... ppl termed u "Angel"angels r meant to fulfill wish..They cnt wish..N when they do..they burn in the same fire..as u r.

Misted waves of earthy sea...showed up well to inform my weep..

U aint deserve to meet ur sea..as it turned up fr another leap..

towards the end of dusky night.. My world shimmered at the haunting lights..

And the waves shwed up again..to inform me that u reigned at ur stake..

that me filthy river has no pace..to match it up with its mighty waves..

And I was left alone that ni8...where to flow...where to reside..

The sea knew that he was my only fate..

but as it turned up and moved his way..

I knew I belong to nowhere..

So I ended up pushing and gushing my waves ...

On the stone and on the fate..

So as me "river" was waiting...

to get myself soaked in this haunting feeling..

And I dried as pretold..

I was nothing without sea's shore..

I was nothing without my sea..

cz fr me it was my fate...nd it was my REACH

I told myself, while dying silently..

it's not easy to have ur sea from it's sea :'(

And I'm trying to breath and I'm trying to sleep... To sleep in a native light...to sleep in a pious climb of dreams & flights..And I'm trying to hold myself in an earthy stream of darkness.. And I stepped up on a breathing light... My hopes were up n so were lights..And I travelled across the nightingale blaze , and I roamed across the lamenting trails ..and I perched upon the fighting waves... they all had terror of loosing lights...they all had terror of loosing LIVES...& I was there left at random... to witness this terror with a familiar tendon.. but as I laughed upon their TAKES.. they looked at me with a slaughtering flare... trying to read my ''breathing eyes'' ... trying to live my "needy life" .. and then I told that the terror is THE SLAVE..and Emptiness-the master trail... that rules upon 'a life' with its blazing laughter...leaving me doomed and abandoned... shredding the bead-locks of loosing lust...leaving them with a rejecting thrust..and ain't I complained and I remarked... still they beckoned at me at every mark..! and I was left alone with nothingness.. and I was left alone with perseverance...

I led a way.. to scorching ground..., the dry waves and the dry rounds.., I was walking beyond the lakes of mirage... , I was walking beneath the ages of dryness..and still I was stared with those accusing eyes..and still I remained a fighting tide..fighting within and fighting beyond..fighting beneath and fighting beside... with every moving hour of transiency..I challenged my life at "my worst" and at "its best" , towards the lake of silent quest..

You see you need it atmost tight.., to stay tucked and stucked in sight..cz 'am not the future that awaits for the glory.. but I'm the 'memory' that leaves past a 'story'... I cannot be forwarded but cn be rewined... I'm a soul without its voice...! An untold story of everlasting saga... without a start,and at its end...by an inferior dark of enchanting saga...

Dunno where I might fall the very next moment... unaware of the rhyming waves that might turn into a cyclone the very next moment... unaware of where to jump where to cease... still I'm on my own at every breath..

Wheneva I look up in to sky... I manage to feel its beyondness... it's rhymingness... its sooothingness... inspite of all extreme heat nd rain it might shower upon me at any moment... It still has its own pace in my lyf..I may stand nowhere in this world of "Intellectuals" for once... but smwhere...this world is all about me..I'm no good orator... I'm just a blessed creation... I feel every depth...every deep instincts of my own... in my own Anonymous way... I dunno wat might befall indeed... but I have got Enormous faith... nd its enourmousity cn blow away any cyclone... on its own...For once...I might stay apart frm myself... But this world stands nowhere... in front of my definition of beauty..cz I'M A CHALENGER... a challenger that challenges...FATE... DESTINY... RULES...Of all OFF-Rules of the world I knw..I stand apart of frm every beauty described... I'm a beauty of my own... n ...a SILENCE OF MY own rigidity of untransience...My tears... My eyes... r just a blurred image of Enormousity... My words... they stand nowhere in front of the UNcomparable faith I carry... cz...I'm BELEIVER... I'm PATEINCE...N I'm Love..

Love fails to define itself...the moment It encounters the defined n refined depth of my love...It refreshens every lyf... evey part and every death lying around...I'm...UNCMPARABLE... unannounced ray of hope... I'm faith... I'm trust...N... I trust..I trust my trust with entirnity of infinite validity :)