Anandi, Shiv and Marriage(SS)Prt 26-Pg 31(May 13) - Page 16

Suddenly he felt someone's hand on his shoulder startling and bringing him out of his unhealthy thoughts. He jerked back to see who is was, coming face to face with Lal Singh. Worried what he might have heard, Jagya gave him a faint smile. Lal Singh asked confused, "Lose to who, Jagya? What were you saying?" Jagya was shocked at his question but gathered himself pretty fast asking back, "What are you talking about, Lal Singh?" Lal Singh said, "You were just saying something with frustration." Thinking quickly Jagya replied "I was questioning god for my life and was saying I won't lose to him. Nothing much." Lal Singh bought that and directed Jagya to his room. Relieved, Jagya followed him thinking of how his family just kicked him out of the haveli.

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The day passed pretty busy for both Anandi and Shiv giving them hardly anytime to think about their morning encounter. Shiv wanted to call Anandi that evening but for reasons he cannot fathom, he felt hesitant. Was it because of the conversation he had with her? Was it because he almost confessed his love to her? Was it because he told her for the first time what he thought of her, even though not how he felt for her? Was it because of their proximity that morning? He didn't know. He felt something different, a change in their relationship after that conversation. He felt more close to her, that he mattered to her which in turn made him more happy. "Then why am I hesitant to call her?" he questioned himself. Then it hit him hard, he was nervous. Shiv Raj Shekhar collector of Jaitsar was nervous. "I am acting like a teenager and everyone thinks I am matured young man", he chuckled.

After his dinner he took the cell to call her telling himself time and again that "Shiv, don't act like a teenager. What is there to be nervous about? This is not the first time you are talking to her? I know you are happy that she thought about your happiness, that she was concerned about you missing on the usual married life. But there is nothing to feel so elated about. She didn't say that she loved you. She just thought about you, was concerned for you just like she is about all the people in this village. You better pull yourself together and come down to earth soon. Just be happy that conversation happened, that she didn't misunderstand you as you feared and get over it. You have to give her the news. Call her before she goes to sleep."

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After returning home Anandi was dragged by Nandu to help him with his homework. Then she helped Gehna in kitchen. She felt bad when she came to know that the family had sent Jagya to stay in the hospital. She blamed herself responsible for this situation in the house. That the family was not able to freely take care of their son because they had to think about her. She wondered if she was doing the right thing by not listening to him as scenes of him pleading for forgiveness and to take him back in her life flashed in front of her. Anandi heard Dadisa call her name, pushing her thoughts aside she rushed to her.

After dinner, she completed her chores, came to her room thinking about the days events. She laid down on the bed as the conversation from that morning played back in her mind. Taking in each word Shiv said to her, how he thought about her well being and gave her the choice to decide her future this time. She slowly walks up to the Kanha picture hanging on the wall and says, "Collector Sab, kitne achhe hai. Meri khushi ke baare mai kitna socha unhone. Yahan tak ki agar mai chahu tho sagai bhi todne ko tayar the. Kanha, main poori koshish karungi ki mai vunko khush rakhu, ek achi dost bankar. Lekin patni? mujhe nahi pata ki mai ek achi patni bansakungi ya nahi. Aap meri madat karenge na."

As Anandi walks out of bathroom after getting herself changed to evening wear, she hears her cell ring. She sees 'Collector Sab' blinking on her screen and picks up.

"Hello, Anadiji", Shiv said evenly.

"Ji, Collector sab", Anandi replied softly.

"Hope I am not disturbing you. I wanted to tell you something." Shiv rushed his words

"No. I am free. Tell me." Anandi said, wondering what it is he wanted to tell.

"Nothing important. I just wanted to inform you that I will not be in Jaitsar from tomorrow as I am going to Jaipur on some office work. I will return in one or two days depending on how work there goes."

"Acha. Aap kab niklenge?

"Tomorrow early morning."

"Tik hai. Sambhal kar jayega."

"Ji. Aap bhi aap ka khayal rakhiye, aur aap ke paanv ka bhi. Aap ka dinner ho gaya?"

"Ji." There was a little pause before she spoke again, "Mujhe bhi aap se kuch kehna hai", she said a little hesitantly.

Shiv feeling a little tensed spoke, "Ya, tell me."

"Thank you, Collector sab. For everything you did and are doing for me. I never said a proper thank you earlier but today I want to thank you for being a good friend to me. I am really very lucky to have such a caring friend, who thinks about my well being. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.", Anandi completed in a velvety tone.

Shiv was flabbergasted by her sentence. He didn't know what he heard or what his was thinking anymore. He tried to comprehend the reason for what she said and why she was saying all this now, hoping everything was fine between them. At the same time a part of him was telling him there was nothing to worry and was feeling very happy about her acknowledging him. Clearing his thoughts, he asked "Anandiji, I didn't do anything to receive this special thank you. Why are you saying all this now?"

Anandi closed her eyes and taking in a deep breath she softly spoke, "You did a lot for me, Collector sab. You saved me the day we first met, helped me get the government help for my school, stood by me when Hath Singh abused me, saved my life for the second time during Jyothi's marriage, taught me things about myself which helped me to love myself again. There are many such thing you did for me. You were always there as a good friend, only that I was not able to see it till today. Now that I realized it, I wanted to thank you for all those times."

A small smile made to his face as he heard her speak. There was no denying the fact that he felt on cloud nine that she is trying to understand him, think positively of him, opening up to him. Generally praises made him uncomfortable, feel awkward but today, this moment, he was happy, infact very happy to listen about him from her view. He wanted her to go on and to not stop. Just the feeling of her talking about him was making him jump in bliss. He chuckled at his foolishness as she continued.

Once she stopped, still with a smile lingering on his lips, feeling glad that she was not in front of him to look at his foolish, child like smile which was stubbornly hanging onto his lips along with the glow on his face, he said, "I was just being a good human and collector in those scenarios. You are unnecessarily giving me extra credit but I am not as modest as you are. What I mean to say is, I just realized I am greedy. Greedy to hear about me from the sarpanch of Jaitsar. Knowing that you think so nice of me makes me feel good. I always hated it when people praised me for doing my duty right but never ever thought that I would crave to listen to such things about me. Looks like compliments coming from you are special, Anandiji." Shiv spoke it all in one go, speaking what his heart felt, without thinking twice before he said it all, of what consequences it might result in.

Anandi was taken by surprise at Shiv's words. She was so much in shock to even respond when Shiv completed. Shiv waited for few seconds expecting her to say something but when he heard nothing from her side, he felt uneasy. He tried to figure out the reason behind her calmness and that was when he realized what he said. Panic and worry hitting him, wondering if he crossed the boundary of friendship which she just started to acknowledge, angry at himself for opening up so much in front of her without even thinking if she was ready to listen to him and praying that as a result of his stupid behaviour she doesn't distance herself more from him, he said almost like a whisper, "Anandiji, I am sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

As Shiv started to apologize Anandi came out of her shock and softly said, "Don't say sorry, Collector sab. I didn't feel bad about what you said. I was just little taken aback, that's all. But I want to say that I meant everything I said. I was not joking." Anandi wanted to make it clear to him that she really meant what she said about him because she was not able to understand if what he just said was a prank, his own way of making her stop praising him or if he genuinely felt happy listening to her.

Shiv immediately replied, "Thank you, Anandiji for everything you just said. Now lets just stop this mission of boosting me. Its already late. You sleep now."

Anandi smoothly answered, "Ji. You have a safe trip."

"I don't know how busy I will get once I am there, so will try to call you when I get time. You need not worry, I will be fine. Good Night."

"Good Night." Anandi disconnected the call and laid down on her bed, deep in thought when her phone rang again. Without looking at the caller id she picked up the call and said, "Kuch bhool gaye, Collector Sab"