Posted:
MERA PARICHAY:(MS. SIDDHI)
(SIDDHI'S DAIRY)
please note:this is not against any other role ... this is only from siddhi's point of view...not to degrade any other character...)
There i go down the memory lane of nine years ...
where i was pondered with loads of love... from mah beloved...
but destiny had something else in store for me...and it happened to change over a midnight...
haa... there i go...
once upon a midnight dreary while i was weak and weary, leaving many unanswered questions to others...
along with the each separate dying ember and various terrors which i never felt before...imaging the slap on mah face given hard by loved ones... and adjusting it with a smile of relief no matter what so ever it might be ... her son would be always there with her and the family... i took the untrodden path...
destiny again played its game by separting me with mah child...
but then again i settlled down with the fact that yes, god has given me a part of his love and affection ... in the form of a tiny tot exactly as a replica of mah beloved...
beloved????
am i supposed to use dis word...
well i leave to u people to decide...
let me not deviate myself from pening down mah emotions...
over many a quint and curious volumes of forgotten lore...
while peeping through the cellar bars...i always tried to listen to the noise of the footsteps...
as of someone rapping rapping to mah cellar...
there is some visitor...
ahhh... i was sure that would be him... i muttered...
only this and nothing more...
eagerly i wished the morrow, vainly i sought to borrow...
to suppress mah feelings of sorrow...
sorrow of mah beloved...As said the worst part of holding the memories is not the pain ... its just the loneliness of it... memories need to be shared...alas...wasnt that luck enough to bugg others as mah own sibilings disowened me...
after nine long years i step out of mah cave... only to see the world as becoming more darker and darker for me...
Deep into the darkness peering, long i stood there wondering and fearing
doubting , found it tough to think about the word " dream"
dunno what to say ... how to express it to him... i always wanted him to be happy...
but the silence was unbroken and the stillness gave no token...Yes i met him... i was happy...happy was not the word...the superlative degree would have also accepted the defeat infront of mah emotions...
wait... let me see him whole heartedly...is looking fine? ...yes ...he is... did he put on weight???
nah... our son must be notorious to make him run around him... tat must have done the magic of being well fit...i stepped forward... but again i got defeated... defeated or dejected or rejected?????
i see him with another woman????
did he ever love me??? no am i thinking wrong... mah thinking skills need to improve... with the crawling female beside him and taking caring of him... and yes he absolutely had no calms about it...
i wanted to tell him that ... listen dear..." i have absolutely no pleasure in the stimulants in which i sometimes so madly indulge...it has not been pursuit of pleasure that i have piled up for reputation and for name and fame... it was only for you and only you...
but was it necessary after watching her beside him????
he moved on ...
"There is a saying 'Tragedy should be utilized as a source of strength.'
No matter what sort of difficulties, how painful experience is, if we lose our hope, that's our real disaster.
No matter what sort of difficulties, how painful experience is, if we lose our hope, that's our real disaster.
again i raised upon for mah son's sake... he would be left alone...i was under impression that he was with his dad... but later on came across the truth...yes ... was all set to face the world...
Time was passing like a flying machine... and i wanted to be a part of it...
but due to ther creator... i came to know that he isnt married...
should i be happy????
yes... not to deny the fact that i was very happy ... felt as if every thing fell into its own place...
i was responsible for this stage where only our souls were together ...
but as persons we were apart from each other for nine long years...
for the very reason he was angry with me ...and was not willing to meet me ..all these years...
felt like hugging him tightly and would never ever let go away from his hug...
but...wats dis????
what did i just hear????
was it him who said it just now...
wow...
hat's off to the person... who happens to give his mind a thought to be arised into his brain of mah motherhood...
did his brain got replenished????
he happened to believe the fact of a female... who tried to harm him from so many years...
is he the same person whom i loved ... or rather say i love... and wasted mah nine years away from mah sibilings , children ...
but this time i was not ready to accept him... as i believe he never i understood me...trusted me
what does love mean to him????
he pleaded me to accept him...
tried his best ...
but mah conscious didnt permit me to do so...
it has been said...
TIME HEALS ALL THE WOUNDS...
i do not agree... the wounds remain. The damage was permanent ,there would always be scars...
hoping that In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. cos as said by famous people...
Pain is a part of life. Sometimes it's a big part, and sometimes it isn't, but either way, it's a part of the big puzzle, the deep music, the great game. Pain does two things: It teaches you, tells you that you're alive. Then it passes away and leaves you changed. It leaves you wiser, sometimes. Sometimes it leaves you stronger. Either way, pain leaves its mark, and everything important that will ever happen to you in life is going to involve it in one degree or another."
so should i call him beloved???? from whom i waited for so long and from his side he too waited for me crazily...
or i shouldnt ...cos of the fact that he doubted mah motherhood... and didn want to separate himself from our child as it reminds him of ME his" WIFE" YES i m still his wife ... cos for the matter of fact that he didn sign our divorce papers...
what have you decided???
well somewhere down mah heart i keep hearing mah name as
MRS SIDDHI KUNAL CHOPRA...
yes i am legally his wife...
WIFE of MR. KUNAL CHOPRA...
NO MATTER WHAT ... ONE THING IS FOR SURE... we wnt be giving any other person enter into our lives...
as YEA we are still MADLY,CRAZILY IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER...and yes i finally accept the part that we both have committed mistakes by lacking communication...but now, not anymore...
SAIYONARA...😳
Kumkum Bhagya
Tu Dhadkan Main Dil
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
