Previous Part: Page 64
Recap: Arnav tries to talk to Khushi but she has kept herself locked in the temple in the house and refuses to speak to him. Arnav's guilt and regret have no bounds and they are continuously increasing. The family returns home from the wedding and Khushi cries her heart out on Nani's shoulder. When questioned, she lies to them saying that she misses her parents. Arnav is shocked at the fact that she didnt tell everyone the truth.
Part 12: Sharing the Secret
When Arnav came back after finishing his phone call, Khushi had composed herself and he could hear Nani and Payal summarizing the wedding events to Khushi. Akash was looking at Khushi with a frown on his face.
"...but then Payal bitiya found it difficult to rest there and her mood swings were getting more frequent, so we came back early." Nani finished the summary.
Khushi forced a smile and nodded. Payal and Akash exchanged a look and then Payal turned to look at Arnav.
"How did this accident happen? How come you guys didn't tell us?" Payal questioned.
Arnav quickly rummaged through his mind for something to say but Khushi beat him to it.
"Bicycles. We were for a walk and this bunch of teenagers was out of a bike ride, I guess...we turned the corner at the same time and bumped into each other...it wasn't a big accident...we didn't want you to get too worried..." Khushi looked at Nani as she explained.
Nani touched Khushi's cheek affectionately. "Go and sleep Khushi bitiya. You'll feel better tomorrow."
"I'm fine Nani." Khushi got up. "I'll just go and get started with dinner..."
"I'm not really hungry...I'll just have a glass of milk before bed." Nani said, stifling a yawn.
"I'll make dinner for the rest of us...HP isn't home today." Khushi said.
Before anyone could stop her, she left. Nani, Payal, and Akash turned their questioning gaze to Arnav. Arnav pretended to be on his phone and avoided eye contact. When he didn't say anything, Nani got up.
"I'll be in my room...I want to take a nap before dinner." She announced.
Payal started to get up but Akash protested. He went with Nani, leaving Payal and Arnav alone in the room. Payal got up and sat next to Arnav. Arnav held his breath.
"Is there something you want to tell me?" she placed a hand on his shoulder.
He looked at his phone a few more seconds, controlling the urge to blurt everything to her, and then looked at her. She was looking at him with calculating eyes. He simply shook his head sideways. Payal nodded.
She picked up a magazine and started flipping through it. Arnav was taken aback. He had expected her to grill him with questions some more but she had accepted his shake of head and had backed off. After she was done through the magazine, she stood up.
"I'm going to freshen up. I'll see you at dinner." She smiled at him and left.
Arnav leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes. Gathering whatever was left of his courage; he made his way to the kitchen. She was working away with various vegetables and containers of spices. He didn't know how long he stood there, watching her, thinking of what to say. When she turned around and finally saw him, she froze and the ladle fell from her hand, cluttering on the floor.
He walked towards her and she walked backwards until she was bound by the counter. He bent and picked up the ladle and held it up in front of her. She snatched it out of his hand and looked away. He was about to start speaking but...
"Khushi, I wanted to'" Payal broke off her sentence when she saw Arnav and Khushi. Arnav didn't take his eyes off of Khushi for a couple of more seconds. Then, he turned around and left, not even looking at Payal.
He had stayed put by the poolside, plugged in his headphones and turned the music to a deafening loudness and closed his eyes, letting the anger seep through him and dissolve into the atmosphere around him. He didn't even realize when his iPod died. When his phone vibrated in his coat's pocket, he got up miserably and made his way downstairs for dinner.
On his way down the stairs, he ran into Khushi who was making her way up the staircase. She froze for a second and climbed a step down backwards. He held up his hand and moved to the side, leaning his back against the railing, giving her enough space to walk past him.
She hesitated but climbed the steps. When she got closer to him, she had pushed herself against the wall opposite to the railing, get as much distance from him as she could. As soon as she had passed him, she practically ran up the stairs.
Arnav ran a hand through his hair, thoroughly frustrated with himself. He turned around to walk down the steps again when he caught Payal's eye. She was frowning, looking confused, and her expression showed worry and concern. In that moment, Arnav knew that she had seen everything.
Throughout dinner, Arnav felt the tension and fear rippling off of Khushi's skin as she sat next to him. He also felt Akash and Payal's calculating gaze on him. Even under such close watch, he couldn't help but steal quick awkward glances at Khushi. She didn't look at him even once. She stared at the food in her plate uninterestedly. She was pushing the rice grains around the plate with her spoon, barely eating.
No one, though Arnav was sure that all had seen this, made a comment on it. She excused herself from the table and walked into the kitchen. Before Akash and Payal had a chance to bombard him with questions, he excused himself and left.
An hour later, Arnav still paced like a caged tiger by the poolside. He still couldn't stand to be in that room. He didn't know how he would spend the entire night in that room...with Khushi. Now that the family was home, he was certain that Khushi would come back to the bedroom.
Just as he had the thought, she walked into the bedroom. He saw her pause two steps into the room and look around. He was sure she was recalling the wretched event, collecting bits of memory from each corner of the room.
Then, she suddenly rushed towards the poolside, slid open the door and stepped out gasping for air. That was when she saw him. The mix of fear, pain, and anger returned to her face and he felt something red hot run through his veins.
He knew she would turn around and leave and so he walked to the only exit from the poolside and stood in front of it. Khushi's eyes widened.
"Don't worry. I only want to ask you something." He swallowed. He never knew he could feel so much pain and guilt just by looking at her! He looked away and so did she.
"Why didn't you tell the family?" Arnav frowned in confusion. "Why did you lie to Nani?"
"I didn't do it for you!" She snapped. Her enraged yet beautiful orbs zeroed in on him. "I did it for them! I love them and I don't want to hurt them...even if it means hiding whatever you did. Nani will die if she finds out. Mami and Mamaji will be devastated! Akash and Payal would be shattered! I'm not a beast like you." She frowned at him. "Do you want them to go through that pain? Wasn't putting me through that pain enough? Wasn't killing me inside enough?"
He blinked. He couldn't find words in his mind. He felt light headed with all her words. He did nothing but watch when she took two steps closer to him. She was at arm's reach! He could have easily pulled her into an apologetic embrace but he didn't. He couldn't. He shouldn't. He didn't have the right.
"You've finished everything Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada! You've destroyed it all! Our marriage, that bond we shared, my trust, my dignity, everything!" Her eyes suddenly filled with tears and he realized that she wasn't angry with the fact that he had hurt her physically. She was angry because he had ruined their marriage. She was angry because he had destroyed her dignity, self-respect, and the trust she had in him. Suddenly, he felt an urgency to explain his position but she didn't want for him.
She wiped her cheeks dry, glared at him, and stomped past him into the bedroom. She picked up a pillow and a blanket and strode over to the recliner. She dumped the load in her arms and swiftly tucked herself in and closed her eyes.
A couple of weeks passed by the same way. Nani, Mami, and Mamaji didn't pay too much attention to growing tension between Arnav and Khushi. They dismissed it as her being disturbed regarding her parents, still. Khushi continued with her duties of a daughter-in-law while Arnav tried, rather unsuccessfully, numerous times to speak to her.
Arnav started spending long hours at the office again and had gone into a subdued mode where he barely said anything. The old ASR, sans the anger, was back. Khushi woke up and left the room before he woke and went to sleep on the recliner before he did.
Payal and Akash were certain that something was wrong. They knew something was being kept from them and finally, two weeks after returning home, they decided to question them.
Payal caught Arnav in his bedroom after dinner. Arnav, concerned for her, hurried towards her.
"Why are you still up? You should be asleep! Junior needs rest!" Arnav forced a smile.
"Stop that!" Payal snapped. "Sit. I need to talk to you."
Arnav had dreaded this conversation. He sat down and folded his hands while she sat next to him. Might as well get this conversation done and over with. He would lie to her, assure her that everything was fine and there was just a little stress from work and that Khushi was still missing her parents.
"Akash and I realized that you and Khushi seem to be having some kind of a problem. My guess is that you've been spending long hours at the office again and she's upset with you for it." Payal smiled lightly.
Arnav swallowed the lump in his throat. Payal was completely wrong in her guessing but he wasn't going to correct her.
"Akash and I have decided that it's high time you two went on your honeymoon." Payal put up her hand thinking that Arnav would protest. "I know you two didn't go because I'm pregnant and you two wanted to be here to take care of me but I'm doing fine...the doctor said everything is perfectly normal. There's still two months left until my due date...you two can go have your honeymoon and be back well in time for the delivery."
Arnav couldn't breathe. The guilt was suffocating him. The secret that him and Khushi were keeping was trying to pierce through his heart. "She's upset with me. She won't come." Arnav choked.
"She's upset because you haven't been able to spend much time with her...you two are still newly married...you should really ditch work for a bit. And don't worry...Akash is talking to her at this exact moment. The fact that you're going on your honeymoon will be enough to cheer her up."
"NO!" Arnav said at last, frustrated beyond extend. "That's not why she's upset! She's not upset because I'm spending more time at the office! I'm spending more time at the office because she's upset with me. Because I'm upset with myself! Hell, that's an understatement! I'm so angry with myself that I could kill myself!"
Payal gasped at his outburst. The obvious guilt dripping in his words had caught her off guard. The tears in his eyes had caught her off guard. She kept a hand on his shoulder.
"What are you hiding from me, Arnav? There's something going on that you haven't told me! Why are you so angry with yourself? I mean...to the extent that you want to kill yourself?!" Payal was shocked.
"If I tell you, you'll want to kill me too. I've done something so terrible that words escape it. There is no term insulting enough for it." Suddenly, he took her hand and held it between his. He looked at her apologetically, like a child desperately looking for forgiveness from his mother.
"I went to a bar with the foreign delegates and they...they said things about my relationship with Khushi..." He started explaining the things they'd said and how they'd made him feel. He noticed that Payal's breaths become short and quick in anticipation. "I came home drunk and I...I..." he clasped her hand tighter. "I raped her." His voice dropped to just above a whisper.
Payal gasped in a breath and he felt her hand sliding from his. She clamped the same hand to her mouth. Her eyes were wide and quickly filling with tears. He gingerly placed a hand on her shoulder.
"Payal...I was drunk...I didn't mean for it to happen but I was just so driven by the alcohol and the anger...I swear I would have never done that if I were sober...you know that don't you?"
He stopped talking because he could tell that she wasn't listening to him. Her mind was elsewhere, in another land of thoughts. Her hand moved from her mouth to her chest. Her eyes were constantly moving, avoiding his face at all times. Then she stopped and looked in a particular spot, her eyes went even wider and her jaw fell slightly open.
He followed her gaze and found Akash and Khushi standing in the doorway. Akash's expression was similar to Payal's. He was holding Khushi's hand by the wrist. Khushi had her eyes closed but tears continued to flow down her cheeks.
Akash looked at Arnav, his expression of disbelief made Arnav feel even guiltier. Akash turned to look at Khushi. When Akash turned back, Arnav saw anger mixed with his expression. He let go of Khushi's hand and at that moment, Khushi opened her eyes.
Then everything happened very fast. Akash had stomped up to Arnav and had him by his collar. Payal moved quickly and held Akash's shoulder, trying to push him back.
"How dare you!" Akash said through clenched teeth.
Arnav stood there, accepting all the wrath. He didn't want to stop Akash. In fact, he wanted Akash to beat him to pulp.
"Akash, let go of him!" Payal pushed him again. "Akash...if you create a scene the family will know..."
Akash glared at Arnav and let go of his collar with a jerk. Arnav staggered a step back.
"Akash...I know what he did is unforgivable but..." Payal started but didn't get a chance to finish.
"UNFORGIVABLE!" Akash burst at last. "I swear if I could, I would..." Akash didn't use words to express himself. He advanced towards Arnav again with a punch all charged up and ready to make contact with Arnav's face.
"Akash!" Khushi called out from the doorway.
All eyes turned to her then. Akash forgot about all his anger when he saw Khushi. Before he could say anything, she turned on her heels and ran out into the room. Akash glared at Arnav before leaving.
Payal glanced at Arnav and took a step towards the door.
"Payal?"
"Don't Arnav. Don't try to explain anything to me. I don't care what you say. What you did was wrong. Absolutely wrong. I can't even describe how disappointed I am in you. Do you realize what you've done?!" Payal walked to him, held him by the shoulders, and shook him. "Do you realize what you've done to her? To your own wife?!" Payal let go of him. "Arnav...every girl trusts her husband to protect her...you were supposed to protect her...you did this to her for what? For some judgemental pigs who were probably drunk out of their senses, who know nothing about you or Khushi, who know nothing about your relationship? You let their comments drive you to this extent? You listened to a bunch of strangers and hurt the one person in this world who made you smile, made you laugh. She made you realize what it is like to appreciate and love your family members. She brought happiness into your life and what did you do? You've erased the happiness out of her life. As much as I love you...as good friends as we are...as a woman...I can't forgive you for this."
Payal turned around and left the room. Arnav's shoulders felt heavy with burden and his knees gave out.
As usual, the ringing of his cell phone brought him back to the present. He wiped the moisture from his cheek'He hadn't realized he'd been crying. He looked at the screen of his phone. Lavanya.
"Yeah?" He said curtly.
"Hey ASR," Lavanya started her flirty drawl. "I'm calling to remind you about your appointment tomorrow'"
"'at the orphanage. I know. I remember." Arnav said and was about to hang up when a thought came to his mind. "Lavanya...can you do me a favour?"
"Anything for you ASR."
"When is our meeting with the Mr. Mehra?"
"In a week's time. And your flight back to Canada is booked for the next day."
"Cancel the ticket. And postpone the meeting." Arnav said confidently.
"But ASR...the next available date is after seven months."
"Even better. Postpone it."
"But why ASR?" Lavanya asked, confused out of her mind.
"Don't ask me questions Lavanya. Just postpone the damned meeting."
Arnav hung up. He looked at the picture of Khushi on his wall, particularly paying attention to her whole hearted smile.
"I promise that I'll bring this smile back. I'll bring the happiness that you deserve back into your life. I'll go to the end of the world to get your forgiveness..." Arnav announced with determination.
Next Part: Page 76
Hey guys! That was the part for today. Thank you all for your wonderful comments. I will reply to them by tomorrow. I am in a rush right now since I need to get to work. The online classes are finally done!😃 but now I work full time so updating will be just as difficult but I will try my best to keep them as close together as possible. Hope you all enjoyed this part...the next part will have more of the present in it. Feel free to comment, they are much appreciated!😳
Love,
Katie <3
Edited by love_iqbal_khan - 12 years ago
Anupamaa
36