The thing is nobody is really at fault and everybody is at fault somewhere. It is because of personality differences and gender problems.
Ilesh is a fluffy character and nothing affects him. I know one or more persons like this and they just do whatever they like and dont listen to their wives. For the wives it is quite irritating.
Disha is quite a serious type of person and unfortunately married to a wrong type of person. She loves him but cant make him listen to her. Devrani and Jethani problems will be there in every family about chore distribution and other things.
About Suhana. What can one say about a purely unrealistic character introduced just for laughs and for the sake of some newness? The only fault of hers is, having experienced Disha's outbursts, she should have gone for a professional agent or no agent at all.
As for BM, she treats Disha as a daughter and hence those words. Dont you remember how she used to find faults with Panna for not adjusting to her mother in law? She even used to get angry if Panna suddenly dropped and stayed for a while in the maika.