toasty's mom

i feel kind of bad for toasty's mom. when toasty is in trouble, she goes running to her parents. when she got kicked out, or when malati needed the house to herself for a little while. her mom loves her so much and has reason as a mother to be worried. if my daughter was in a house wiht a pashu character, i would be worried to! giving up her hard up education, doing all of teh housework that she was never raised to do. but toasty is always so mean to her and getting mad at her, when she worries or looks out for her. and the family can be really rude to her too sometimes. but she has a big heart that she still continues to care and love and look out for toasty even though toasty doesn't give her any importance in my opinion. i don't like that whole school of thought that when you become marired only your sasural matters and mayka becomes secondary

I disagree with you. I am not saying that Toasty is right but at the same time , her mom is also not right. If she wanted to help Tej, she could have talked with Lalit first and then with Toasty, and they could have helped him by getting a loan from the bank. Why does she have to put her jewellery in bank and get money to give to Tej without first consulting her daughter or her husband? I understand she is a concerned mom but then she does everything wrong which puts Toasty in further trouble. And yes, toasty will go running back to her mom when she needs them cos they are her parents, but at the same time Toasty, not only toasty but all DILs, have to maintain a thin line between the sasural and mayka. You cannot hurt anyone, but you can expect the maayka people to understand cos they know you but sasural they will balme you since even after years you will still remain an outsider. Sorry, I did a little rant of my own

i know but is that fair?? so the parents who love you and raise you in the end are just suppose to watch you when you are in trouble and upset? and take all of your mood swings...and your sasural gets all the good stuff? she should be getting mad at tej for taking the money from her mom and appreciate that her mom loves her enough to do waht she did to get tej the money. but the person who is wrong in all honesty is tej. but toasty never says anythign to her husband or sasural ppl. even when her sister was tutoring prachin under her request to help him pass his exam, she let everyone get mad at her sister and throw her out of the house, adn she always sides with prachin in their little arguments, it hink it's a bit much sometimes and unrealistic. yeah her mom shouldn't meddle, like the whole phone call thing when she overheard tej talking to toasty was wrong, but toasty should also appreciate she is doing what a mom with only two daughters will do. i mean tomorrow her little sister will be marired too, then what, then who will they have?? a girl can be both a daughter and daughter in law, the balance doesn't have to be so lopsided.

Actually it is tej's fault who didnt tell toasty that he took money frm her mother...pathetic ...toasty is so sad n disappointed when she came to know this..

Originally posted by: pesi11

Actually it is tej's fault who didnt tell toasty that he took money frm her mother...pathetic ...toasty is so sad n disappointed when she came to know this..

exactly, just as chedi has rights over toasty...toasty's mom has rights too she raised her, educated her, did so much for her. you don't just forget that relationship the moment you get married. but if toasty is so against her mom becoming involved, if seh wants to get mad at someone she can get mad at tej not her mom, as tej is the one who took the money. what was her mom suppose to do?? tell him no? she loves him like her son now and toasty is her daughter...my parents would have done the same thing. i would have gotten mad at my husband and appreciated how much my parents love me that they were willing to give so much money for my happiness.

she does all of the work there for them, takes all of their accusations, constantly runs at their beck and call, and she does it happily. it is nice how she takes her bahu duties so seriously. but it's such an oxymoron that she does all of this but then is so mean to her own parents. she never has any objection to anythign her sasural does and only objections to everything her parents do. and i'm sorry they raised her you can't just cut your parents out of your life like that because you got married and your sasural is what matters...a good modern day bahu will learn to balance both and treat both parents with the same love, care, respect, and dignity.

its' nto fair that chedi can say or do whatever because toasty is the "beti" of the house but then has so much objection and is so rude to toasty's mom for thinking of tej as the "beta" of her house. if toasty is his bahu, tej is also her damad.

Originally posted by: groovychica_22

its' nto fair that chedi can say or do whatever because toasty is the "beti" of the house but then has so much objection and is so rude to toasty's mom for thinking of tej as the "beta" of her house. if toasty is his bahu, tej is also her damad.

I completely agree with you on every point said. It is an in justice for girl's parents, first to be treated as a "second rate citizens" in the family, second being ridiculed by their own daughter. I also did not like the track where Chedi was not allowing his son to go and stay at his in-law's place. Come on, their daugther is also satying with your family all the time.

Such kind of mentality needs to be challenged rather than promoted. Both parents should have a say in their children's lives. Girl's parents are not meant to be demeaned, but to be respected ( even more as they let their daughter being part of another family, without really getting anything in return)

I also felt bad for Toasty's mom and I'm not saying that Toasty was right, but still I can't support Sudha completely. my personal opinion is, a girl's parents should not interfere in their married daughter's family matters. it creates misunderstanding and problems. Malti's mother is an example. her married life was destroyed because of her mom.