Chapter 20
it was time to go back to Mumbai, he started opening subjects to distract me from thinking about ideas like plane crashing over Middle East, Geet was sleeping in her chair and i was holding Maan's hand. i opened the subject about his father but he refused to talk about him, i told him that i need to know.. and he was quiet for a while, holding my hand tight "i really loved him.." i looked at Maan "before he started drinking excessively.. he used to take me to cricket games" i smiled at him "he was a good man" Maan knotted his eyebrows as if thinking hard about something "i dont know what drove him away to that road.." he seemed to be gone away with his ideas then he blikned "oh" he said
"what?"
he inhaled heavily "he had lost the company.."
i looked at him in disbelief "did you just remember that?"
"i havent spoken about my father for about 25 years Geet.. all the memories are buried somewhere in the back of my head.. even the cricket games days seem blurry to remember" i smiled at him "what?"
"i feel special.. i'm the first one to talk about your father after so long"
he giggled softly "Geet.." he squeezed his hand on mine and looked straight into my eyes "you are special to me whether i talk about my father or not"
i smiled shyly at him he brought my head closer and kissed it, i rested my head on his shoulder "you never thought about forgiving him?"
"no"
i nodded "if it was my father, would you let me not forgive him?"
"you did not witness what i did Geet"
"but i know, if my father was alive.. and i talked to him about it, i will feel some kind of relief that is finally off my chest hai na?"
he kissed my head for a moment then said "i promise to think about it"
i didnt argue after that. the plane in Mumbai airport, i was really happy to be back in Mumbai this time, maybe because London is now not my favorite place to be. the moment we were inside the apartment i told Maan that i want to visit ma.. we changed our clothes and went to her apartment, he rag the bell but no one opened.. i started getting worried by the time we started banging on the door, i called ma and Amit but no one answered. Maan suggested that they might be in Goa or simply not at the house, we went back home but i couldnt sleep that night, my heart ached me and i felt something wrong happened while we were in London, sometimes that night i had tears of a thought and giggled about another silly thought.
at 7:30 am Maan reached his hand for me but all what he touched was an empty space, thats when he opened his eyes and looked at me sitting far on the bed "Geet" he said sitting "did you stay up all night?" he got closer and as i nodded "why didnt you wake me?" he put his arm around me "kya hua?" asked me as he kissed my head
i rested my head on his shoulder "im worried that something might happen to ma or Amit" i sighed
"but they might only be outside Mumbai na..?"
"i can feel it Maan.. i just fear tha.." but i was interrupted by my mobile ringing, i quickly grabbed it "hello?"
"Geet"
i held Maan's hand, unintentionally, as i heard Amit's sad voice "Amit, kaise ho? aur ma.. are you both ok? we cam back but didnt find you at the apartment.. is something wrong?"
Amit giggled "Geet.. one by one" i sighed, and he paused for a while "your mother is in the hospital.." i held Maan's hand tight "they had to do an abortion"
"why.."
he exhaled heavily "they discovered a rare disease in her kidney.." he sniffed "it's going to kill her if they dont find a donor Geet"
tears were on my cheek but i kept a steady voice "which hospital?" Amit gave me the hospital name and we hang up, i put my mobile down and looked at Maan, i couldnt say a word i just put my arms around him and asked him to take me to ma like a little kid.
we were in the hospital, sitting in a doctor's office, he was talking about ma's condition.. how rare it is and how lethal it can be on her life "and how long does it take to find the right donor?" i asked
"6-12 months.." the doctor looked at me concerned "but by that time she might not survive"
i nodded "you said family members can be a great match right?"
"Geet!" Maan sounded annoyed
"yes, you can be a perfect match" the doctor nodded
"what should i do now?"
"Geet, we didnt discuss this"
"there is nothing to discuss Maan" i looked at him "she is mom.. i will have to do anything to save her"
he looked away, i looked back at the doctor who started to tell me what kind of tests i should take and the risks.. the moment the doctor mentioned death, Maan got up and slammed the door behind him. all the tests that i had to do with Amit, Maan didnt want to participate in anything related to it. the results came to be positive.. i was happy, and we set a date for the operation. i visited mom later that day, she was pale.. lying in the white bed unconscious waiting to be saved.
i was lying in bed and Maan was sitting, thinking.. "can i at least say my opinion on this?" he asked me annoyed
"sure"
"i dont want you to do it"
i looked back at him "i have to"
"no you dont, there are donors everywhere for kidneys.."
"mom cant wait until then, she might die Maan"
he looked at me "i dont want to lose you"
"it will be hard to live a life knowing mom is not here and i had a way to help her but didnt" he looked away "i have to be selfless.."
"no" he looked at me "i am the most selfish man when it comes to you.. i want you with me forever"
"i will only be lifeless Maan"
he stared at me for a while then mumbled "fine" he gave me his back and lied down
i giggled by his not very Maan like reaction, got closer to him and kissed his shoulder "i love you" i whispered
"i hate you" i chuckled by the seriousness his voice sounded, was about to move away when he held my hand, i looked at him, he slowly lied on his back and looked back at me "i love you" he whispered. i smiled then rested my head on his chest and slept.
the operation day was Friday, the whole family came and visited us.. even Ela came from London, it made me feel as if this was the last day i'll ever see them. the most that made me have tears was Geet who i hugged tightly, kissed her everywhere.. told her that i love her about a million time.. and made her tell me mama every now and then. then the room was empty, just me in bed and Maan on chair.. quiet. he was staring at me, i slowly looked at him and saw his moisture eyes "if anything happens to you" he threatened "i swear to God i will never forgive you"
i smiled at him "so i will be tortured in grave?"
"Geet!" he yelled, a tear fell on his cheek as he put his arms around me and hugged me "dont ever say that, you will wake up.. you will be fine.. you will live with me until the end" he was kissing me rapidly between his sentences
i was having tears kissing him back, he looked at me "i love you" i whispered
"no" he shook his head "i wont say this now" he smiled at me "you will have something to wake up for.."
i bit my lip as i hugged him tightly "you" i whispered
the doctor came and said it was time, Maan kissed my forehead and my lips.. then they took me to the op room.. doctors and nurses around me, all speaking in a medical language that i felt like an alien between them "count from 1 to 100.." someone said
by the time i reached 10, i was asleep.. and there i dreamed about the beach.. i was standing looking at the sunset and the beautiful ocean ahead of me when i heard someone calling my name, i looked at my right to see dad.. i smiled and started running towards him "GEET" i heard Maan shouting "dont go to him!"
i looked back to see Maan far away "he is dad" i shouted, then i stopped in front of my father "how are you?" i asked, he looked young and handsome like i always remember him
"im great.. and you?"
"im suppose to be in an operation.."
he smiled "i know.." he slowly put his cold hand on my cheek "you are doing a good job, helping your mother"
i smiled at him "i have a question to ask"
he nodded "i cant explain my actions towards your mother" he answered the unasked question "but i still loved her"
"twisted love dad.."
"you can call it that.." he sighed looking at the ocean, taking his hand away from my cheek "she had always been there for me.. whether it was sickness.. or just.. there"
"why would you hit her then?"
he shook his head "i dont know"
"i have mixed feelings about you" i confessed
"you are allowed to hate me if you want to" i shook my head "love me still?"
"you are my father" his eyes were teary when i said that "whatever you did to my mother was unacceptable, unexplainable but i still love you"
he looked down "i love you too beti.." i smiled as he held my hand.. we both were looking at the ocean for a while when he said "you have to wake up now"
i blinked at him "its not my time yet?" i thought that i was dead already
he laughed "no Geet.. you will live with your husband and daughters" he looked behind me and giggled "he thinks i might hurt you"
i looked back to see Maan running towards me "am i ever going to see you again?"
"yes" dad smiled "i will be in your dreams again.."
"i love you dad"
he opened his arms for me to hug him, Maan was shouting not to do that, when i was about to, my eyes were opened.. i looked around.. the lights were on my face and they almost blinded me, i closed them again "Geet" Maan's warm voice made me turn my head to his direction, he kissed my forehead "welcome back" he whispered
PRECAP
"God Geet.." he said kissing my head "i dont think i can see you like this.."
"like what?" i was resting my head on his chest listening to his heart beat
"hurting.. in pain.."
"it wont last forever.. just few weeks.." i said closing my eyes
"weeks will be years to me.. just to" he paused "i dont want you to go through it alone.."
"you're here.. how can you say alone?" i mumbled still closing my eyes
he was quiet, as if thinking.. and i didnt move back to see his eyes
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Debate Mansion
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