How do I Live Without you
Maan saw her standing wearing a sari. She took his breath away, she had done it the last time and this time it felt even stronger this wrench in his gut. He called out her name, as if a chant, a question and a need all rolled into one.
He stood there to watch the candles light her face giving her a glow almost an aura that told him to tread carefully. She hid something behind her as he called her name. He saw that. He went up to her and asked "Kya hai tumhare haath mein?"
"Kuch nahin" replies Geet with uncertainty in her voice, trying to hide the letter Pari had given. She throws it in the vase behind her on the table and brings her hands up front.
Maan lets it go. He had noticed the ruffling of the paper but for now he needed to talk to her about something more important.
"Sari?" He quizzed.
"Woh Pari ne bola tha isiliye aur woh khud gayab hai. Aapne dekha usse?" Geet replies with confusion laced in her body language and voice. She is still trying to look for him.
"Woh chali gayee, Geet, usne phone kiya isiliye mein idhar aaya…woh usne kaha ki mere liye…." Sunddenly it struck him what Pari had been scheming. He now put two and two together. So this is what she is up to. Pari had realized that he had feelings for Geet and she had gone away, to make room for Geet. But Pari did not know that Geet was going to leave him. Oh what a quandary. He had told Geet she was free, but was he ever going to be free of her. Was he ever going to stop him feeling for her. Those eyes, that face were going to haunt him forever. How does one live without the very breath. He felt incomplete without her. He felt she was his very universe. She is who he sought wherever he went. In office, at home, in gym she followed him everywhere. Finding her in the attic, following him was a sign, was it not that they are meant for each other. But he in his pride, hurt, ego had pushed her away just to punish her. In his moment of anger he had told her the vile things he never wanted to say. She meant more to him than living. He clenched his jaw in frustration and anger at himself and tightened his hands in determination.
He should apologise, he thought. He should tell her not to go. But before he could say anything, she spoke "Mein ja rahi hoon Sir, ye job chorke, mein kal se naukri dhoondhna shuru karoongi. Phir aap bhi mujhse aazad hain. Aapko Pari mil jaayegi, daadi ko unki bahu aur mein…. Mein.." she could not continue for she had a sob welling up and she stopped to gulp. Just then Maan put his hand on her mouth.
"tum kahin nahi jaa rahi ho" he ordered. "Tum yahin rahogi, yehi naukri karogi. Meine tumhein gusse mein bahut kuch keh diya jo mujhe nahi kehna chahiye tha" he continued with a much softer tone.
She opened her mouth to counter his words to remind him that he had spoken not just more than he ought to, he had broken her heart. He had pierced a dagger and not even waited to see her bleed. She did not think she should forgive him that easily. But her heart was already melting, melting at the look in his eyes. His eyes which spoke volumes to her and right now they seemed contrite, repentant. She tried to fortify herself against their beseeching emotions and she retorted, "Nahi sir aapne jo kehna tha keh diya. Ab kuch nahi bacha hai. Aapko apni zindagi wapis mil rahi hai, jahan meiin na hoon, mein jo appke liye ek galti hai."
She remembered the taveez that was left in the attic and realized that even though it bound them together, it was time that she walked away from him. Walked away so that he got some peace. She was nothing more than a mistake in his life. And he would be making a bigger one if she stayed with him, for her situation did not allow her the right to be with him.
"Geet" he implores almost pleading. "Pari chali gayee. She called me to tell me that she is leaving and now Daadima wants to meet the girl. Mein kya karoon Geet?" he questioned her.
He did not want to plead to Geet. But he knew this was the only way to keep her. Give her the excuse of Daadi's health to keep her. He knew, she had a soft corner for Daadi and he will use whatever means he had to keep her.
Geet turned to leave, without answering, without acknowledging the need in his voice. She had always been a sucker to his need. This time she was not going to keep herself open to let him hurt her again. This time she will walk away. Let him do what he wants with his Daadi. She was not going to be party to his lies to his Daadi. She was not going to play his game.
But he had caught her pallu.
"Chor dijiye, Sir, mujhe jaane dijiye. Daadima ko keh dijiye usse jaana pada wapis Mumbai. Aap usko wapis bula lenge. Mein ye natak nahi kar sakti. Mein aapki jhooti mangetar nahi ban sakti." Geet tried to reason with him to let her go.
He came towards her in slow deliberate steps. Wrapping the pallu around her shoulders, so that he would not lose control. He had seen her back and fantasies had taken over. He could not stop himself from imagining her in his arms, with nothing on her and he had taken control over himself and walked up to her to wrap it around her. But he could not stop himself from holding her. He wrapped his hand around her waist, hand almost under her breasts, sitting in the slight curve of her stomach.
He oozed all his pent up passion through his eyes but it was mixed with anger, anger he felt at making his girl who meant everything to him to lash out in her hurt. He should have known, that her eyes had not lied to him. He should have known that he had not read her wrong. He had seen it right, she did feel for him, but for some reason she had lashed at him. What was it that made her take a step back after being with him all the way. What was it that she kept hidden when she lowered her gaze? What did she try to tell him in her cryptic statements?
He needed her around to find out the truth, the whole truth that he had glimpsed in her eyes but she had not uttered with those lips. He was going to find out and for that he needed to keep her with him.
He decided to take action. Pleading for her acquiescence will not work. Maan Singh Khurana needed to take control, control of the situation.
"Meine keh diya so keh diya. Tum nahi jaa rahi h," turning her towards him. "Tumhari wajah se Pari chali gayee hai. Ab tumhein uski jagah leni padegi. Jab tak mein nahin kehta tum meri mangetar banker rahogi. Jab tak daadi theek nahi ho jaati, tum meri mangetar banker rahogi." He growled and swooped her up in his arms to take her to Daadi.
How do I Live Without You – Trisha Yearwood
How do I
Get through one night without you
If I had to live without you
What kind of life would that be?
Oh I need you in my arms
Need you to hold
Your my world my heart my soul
If you ever leave
Baby you'd take away everything good in my Life.
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I
How do I
O how do I live?.
Without you
There'd be no sun in my sky
There would be no love in my life
There would be no world left for me
And I
Baby I don't know what I would do
I would be lost if I lost you
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything real in My life
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever ever survive?
How do I
How do I
O how do I live?...
Please tell me baby..
How do I go on?
If you ever leave
Well baby you would take away everything
Need you with me
Baby don't you know your everything good in My life
And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I
How do I
O how do I live
How do I live without you
How do I live without you baby.......
How do I live....
Aami Daakini
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