This is for request by Kiran a.k.a Pebblez :-)
Neverwhere
"I am bored." The lady with "Thing one" written on her t-shirt whined.
"So am I." The guy with "Thing two" written on his t-shirt agreed.
"We have not had any 'visitors' for a while now", she mused sullenly.
"Right. It's been three weeks since the last batch of "ghost busters" peed in their pants for minor moaning and little mischief we created which was basically PG13. Do you think they have stopped shivering yet?" he replied and questioned without any enthusiasm.
"You think we scared them really badly to keep up the haunted house gossip alive? I mean, we cannot really get out of this damn mold affected rotten house, so we do need our entertainment every once in a while. If we lose these occasional self-proclaimed brave people, we would die. Again. This time because of boredom", she whined.
He was about to respond when they heard footsteps and a guy whining "Riddhima, this is a bad idea" in the verandah which was followed by "Are you scared of a teeny haunted house Armaan?" in a really patronizing tone.
Thing one and Thing two were suddenly feeling very happy.
Finally.
New victims were here.
However, the new people who came into the house were not your run of the mill ordinary couple. They decided to give the new couple - Armaan and Riddhima few minutes to get acquainted with the house first. The couple was exploring the house making as little noise as possible; girl grumbling and the guy grumbling even more. And then they heard the most annoying nasal voice. Ever.
"Riddzzzyyy....!!!! Where are youuuuu? I am here to protect you....!!!!!"
Vikram. Oh yeah. Wherever Riddhima was, her stalker/admirer/self-proclaimed future boyfriend/resident (chose any location, any number of people) idiot was also here.
"Is that the ghoul from the attic of slate roofed house in next lane?" Thing one asked.
"I think it's the poltergeist that we drove away from the cupboard in first floor. Its irritating high octave matches this voice." Thing two replied.
"Nope. It seems someone new. Look at him and listen to him. His voice and his style are both loud. Just that tone of his voice makes me scrap my skin with scales and poke chopsticks through my ears. Is he new to our world? Did you hear anyone dying in this area and passing over to our side?"
"I have not. But you know we missed past two meetings with the "Committee for all supernatural beings imagined and real" where some naive rookie would have passed over."
"If that was the case, someone would have warned him about us. But that whiny voice is so annoying." Thing one complained.
And then they heard the human girl talk.
"Who called that moron here Armaan?" She seethed.
"It was not me Riddhima trust me! I am certain that it is Rahul. That dope always tries to ruin my time with you." The boy called Armaan muttered.
"I think I will kill him tonight here and dump the body in attic or something. Will you help me?" The girl was little too eager to carry out her not so pseudo threat.
"Riddhima!" Armaan yelled.
"What? I am serious", she replied.
Thing one and Thing two looked at each other.
"That Vikram thing cannot be murdered here." Thing one exclaimed.
"But he might see 'The Light' and go towards it which will do those humans and us a huge favor." Thing two reasoned.
"Nope. He is the kind of guy who would need neon lights, pictures of girls in skimpy clothes and copious amount of candy to lure him somewhere."
"Or that girl: Ridhdima." Thing one sighed.
"Right." Thing two agreed.
"We have to save that whiny voiced idiot before that girl Riddhima kills him here. I simply cannot have him haunting in this house." Thing one declared and floated towards Armaan and Riddhima. Those two apparently were not getting along so well either. Thing one vaguely wondered of the other boy Armaan would also be killed by the girl that night. Riddhima was seeing blood.
"Look Armaan, if you don't stop making these crappy horror movie references with every step I take, I will stab you with my stilettos." She warned.
"Who, in their right mind would wear high heels in a terrain like this?" Armaan asked her.
"Terrain? We are inside a house you dolt and not hiking."
"But there might be circumstances where we might have to run!" Armaan exclaimed.
"Run? Why would we run? It's not like this place is haunted or anything", she retorted.
"Hey" "Hey" Both Thing one and Thing two yelled, not that any human could hear them.
"Riddhima, many people have claimed that they have seen ghosts in this house."
"And they are right!" Thing two nodded along with Armaan.
"Look Armaan. We will just look around the house, tease Vikram and perhaps even spook him enough to be afraid for a few days so that he is locked up in his room and go. And when we do this, if you maintain two feet distance from me and absolute silence, it will be a highly painless experience for you."
"Fine. Fine. How many more rooms are remaining?"
"Hmm...we are in first floor right? Just one last room then. According to rumors, it's the room which is supposedly haunted." She made those air quotes when she said 'haunted'.
Thing two looked impressed with Riddhima and Thing one drooled over Armaan. They were once humans after all. They looked at one another and knew what they had to do.
"Let's spook their pants off!"
At first, Armaan squeaked and Riddhima ignored. When it happened for second time, Armaan jumped a little and Riddhima was little surprised. They were hearing extra pair of footsteps walking next to them on the wooden floor.
"It's the ghosts!" Armaan whispered in Riddhima's ear. Thing two sniggered.
"Must be rats or something Armaan. Stop being so paranoid."
"Do rats stop when we stop walking? Do they maintain same pace as ours? Riddhima am telling you it's the ghosts." He stopped talking and also stopped walking. The ghost steps also stopped. Armaan was spooked, Riddhima merely looked curious.
"Armaan it must be these old wooden panels which haven't been used in all these years making additional noises when we walk", she tried to find reason in their situation.
Thing one looked hurt while Thing two looked insulted.
Armaan and Riddhima were standing in front of the door and when Armaan was just about to open it, the door opened on its own with a bang. Armaan jumped few inches and Riddhima was tiny bit pale.
"Must be the wind", she told Armaan.
"Right Riddhima. Just when I am about to open the door, wind chooses that exact moment to do its thing which opens only this door in the house while every other thing including the CURTAINS OVER OPEN WINDOWS ARE INTACT", he shouted the last part.
Thing one and Thing two were now looking at Riddhima. Suddenly their motive of being entertained had been changed to impress Riddhima with their haunting skills. A few days later when they would retrospect this episode, they sure would feel "fangirl-ish".
"You have a point there Armaan", Riddhima replied. It was a little odd.
"Do you still want to go in?" Armaan asked.
"We are here this far, so let's finish it", she responded. Thing one and Thing two were really impressed. It was one thing to watch all this horror related garbage in movies, but in real life people got scared for much basic sillier things. But Riddhima had hold on for this far.
"Should we spook them further?" Thing two asked Thing one.
"Nah. Let's stop here. There is no fun in spooking people who don't want to be afraid." Thing one preached philosophically.
"You just don't want to bruise your ego further", Thing two scoffed at which Thing one shot a dirty look. Thing two knew when to shut up.
"Okay Riddhima, now we have seen this room. Can we please go now?" Armaan pleaded.
"Yes, let's go. But just make sure that Vikram is out of our way when we go back. If I see him, maybe I will kill him today." Riddhima replied.
"I don't understand your irrational anger towards Vikram but whatever. Come on", Armaan literally dragged her out when Vikram was searching for them in kitchen and pantry.
"I like that girl." Thing one said.
"She will make an awesome ghost one day", Thing two replied with dreamy eyes.
Sookie
Edited by Sookie* - 15 years ago
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