Boomerang, Grocery and Beggar - 3 jokes

What do you call a boomerang which never comes back?

A stick. 😛

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Eye-opener for women, and a tip for men. 😉

In the frozen foods department of our local grocery store, I noticed a man shopping with his son.
As I walked by, he checked something off his list and I heard him whisper conspiratorially to the child,
"You know, if we really mess this up, we'll never have to do it again."
😲
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This is what Rita told..
I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and
shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars, and asked, "If I give you this money,
will you buy make-up material with it instead of dinner?"

"No, I stopped make-up years ago," the homeless woman told me.

"Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?" I asked.

"No, I don't waste time shopping," the homeless woman said. "I need to
spend all my time trying to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?" I asked.

"Are you CRAZY!!" replied the homeless woman. "I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!"

"Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going
to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight." 😛

The homeless woman was shocked. "Won't your husband be furious with you
for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting." 😲

I said, "That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks
like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and make-up." 😛
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