Perception vs. Reality

As a teenager, I used accompany my mother to weddings. In some weddings, she would not know the groom and bride closely (like some office colleague's son or daughter). In the wedding, a great discussion would happen about how the pair/couple is. The aunties would say, they look like Lakshmi- Narayanji together. How they would conclude that?

1. Is the skin complexion compatible of the groom and the bride?

2. Is the height compatible?

3. Are the looks compatible? Is the girl skinny and the guy well built?

4. Is the education/ degrees compatible?

5. Is the socioeconomic status compatible?

If it is yes, to most of the above questions, they would be equated with Lakshmiji and Narayanji pair. If the guy has a ponch or too thinned hairline at a young age, if the girl is a bit plump, they would never say they are an ideal pair. People concluded this without knowing the nature, personality, the compatibility of the bride and groom. Even girls and boys tend to date someone who they perceive matches them looks wise, or common interest wise only to know that at looks level, interest level, they may be great, but are not compatible as a personalities who can stay with each other 24/7. When a couple realizes that they are not compatible does not mean the love that they felt for each other was false.

Ak- AbhiM-

1. AK on the day of mahashivarati day (BP heart attack track) IMAGINES that AbhiM is Shankar and she is Paravati, the perfect couple, when in REALITY AbhiM, had gaslighted her the previous night for preferring her family over HIS love. AK said sorry to AbhiM, as she did not even understand that she was being gaslighted.

2. AK- AbhiM worst first fight after marriage, was when AbhiM said he regrets marrying her and AK said he is just abusive as his father. Immediately after the fight, they meet each other at Savan- Milani function. AK by then already started doubting her relationship dynamics with AbhiM, but she still loved him enough to push it under the carpet. During the function, AbhiM was supposed to make AK wear bangles. He did not want to. Then AK said to him, ' Do it for the sake of family's happiness. As family THINKS that we are made for each other'. By saying this AK indirectly indicated that in REALITY they are not made for each other, but, their family PERCEIVES that they are made for each other.

AK and AbhiM journey started from them PERCEIVING each other as perfect companion. With each jolt of life, followed by AbhiM's rage attacks on her, AK started questioning this PERCEPTION. Even though she came back to AbhiM after first divorce, she hardly had faith on their relationship, indicated by a weak handprints of hers on the Birla home wall. Even after AbhiM throwing her out on white day, even though weak, the PERCEPTION remained. However, when she asked AbhiN to be Abhir's father, her brain had accepted that Ak- AbhiM relationship is just a PERCEPTION whereas her heart still eventhough weakly wad clinging to that PERCEPTION. Hence, on one side she keeps on fighting to protect her relationship with AbhiN, but we don't feel her heart completely lies there.

One day AK's heart will be out of this PERCEPTION completely. That day she will REALIZE that AbhiM may be a great doctor, a good human being, even a good friend but is not made for her.

Makers can flip the story anytime based on TRP, but looking at the storyline till now, I see AK- AbhiM relation as described in the post.

Also, if I look at the story from twin- flame/ soulmate perspective I may see it a bit differently.

Let's not term as it as soulmate or twin flame story . Forget logic and sensibility , it's trashy ..my view may be different from others but I never witnessed a "normal" couple here ..there were problems right frm the time the families met and none were handled sensitively and the way I expected them to ...which wud make me believe in the concept of love which they were trying to sell .

I'm sorry for this continous rant ..more than abhira themselves their fans perceived them as some hotshot couple , who were meant to be ..soulmates don't do this to each other...let's say..for even a brief period of time.. when did they have understanding, communication, trust , respect, like normal couples ?

I agree with you Krinya...I am just trying to make some sense of the story...(may be there is none😆)

From humanistic POV, I see AbhiM as obssessive lover/ a narcicistic and AK, being an HSP ( highly sensitive person) got into the relationship thinking it is love, only to realize that she has got trapped. That is why she was very scared to rednter it after 1st divorce.

Nacicists attracts HSPs, as HSPs feel that they will try and make this person happy. But, in the end only get exhausted to the extent that they loose their identity. That is what happened with AK.

Also, I m trying to make sense of changed behavior of AbhiM in Kasauli. I don't know why I feel, AbhiM is subconsciously copying AbhiN. He supported Shefali after AK said he should learn to RESPECT.. only to drag AR after just few weeks down the stairs.

His current behavior change happened after he watched AbhiN caring for AK (the milk scene). So I feel his good or bad, nothing is to stay and not genuine. It is reflection of someone's suggestion or act.

Originally posted by: MyThoughts

I agree with you Krinya...I am just trying to make some sense of the story...(may be there is none😆)

From humanistic POV, I see AbhiM as obssessive lover/ a narcicistic and AK, being an HSP ( highly sensitive person) got into the relationship thinking it is love, only to realize that she has got trapped. That is why she was very scared to rednter it after 1st divorce.

Nacicists attracts HSPs, as HSPs feel that they will try and make this person happy. But, in the end only get exhausted to the extent that they loose their identity. That is what happened with AK.

I m trying to make sense of changed behavior of AbhiM in Kasauli. I don't know why I feel, AbhiM is subconsciously copying AbhiN. He supported Shefali after AK said he should learn to RESPECT.. only to drag AR after just few weeks down the stairs.His current behavior change happened after he watched AbhiN caring for AK (the milk scene). So I feel his good or bad, nothing is to stay and not genuine. It is reflection of someone's suggestion or act.

Abhimanyu have too many exceptions and conditions for her from day 1 even before she accepted his love but from the day he thought she too have feelings for him. He always wanted her to keep him as top priority and above her family when he never did that for her.His priority is always his mom . But Ak never complained about that once. His love for her is always conditional attached with tags. Even then she tried to mend herself to fit into his shoes. She didn’t realise the reality until the 1st divorce hit her .

@Green , when I said the same thing last weeksome don’t want to hear or accept this . Yes he is trying to be another Nav from the day Ak said she respect lacked in their relationship and it was Umarkhaid for her ,it became strong when Ak blurted the truth about Nav and her relationship. Now it’s getting stronger after coming to kasuali by watching her n Abhir closely. He is not being genuine ,he is trying hard to impress everyone to achieve his goal.Muskan’s bhaiji act is also part of that.