Performance evaluation translations

1.A keen analyst: Thoroughly confused.
2.Absolutely trustworthy: For about as far as you can throw him.
3.Accepts new job assignments willingly: Never finishes a job.
4.Active socially: Drinks heavily.
5.Alert to company developments: An office gossip.
6.Approaches difficult problems with logic: Finds someone else to do the job.
7.Average: Not too bright.
8.Bridge builder: Likes to compromise.
9.Character above reproach: Still one step ahead of the law.
10.Charismatic: No interest in any opinion but his own.
11.Competent: Is still able to get work done if supervisor helps.
12.Conscientious and careful: Scared.
13.Consults with co-workers often: Indecisive, confused, and clueless.
14.Consults with supervisor often: Very annoying.
15.Delegates responsibility effectively: Passes the buck well.
16.Demonstrates qualities of leadership: Has a loud voice.
17.Displays excellent intuitive judgement: Knows when to disappear.
18.Displays great dexterity and agility: Dodges and evades superiors well.
19.Enjoys job: Needs more to do.
20.Excels in sustaining concentration but avoids confrontations: Ignores everyone.
21.Excels in the effective application of skills: Makes a good cup of coffee.
22.Exceptionally well qualified: Has committed no major blunders to date.
23.Expresses self well: Can string two sentences together.
24.Gets along extremely well with superiors and subordinates alike: A coward.
25.Happy: Paid too much.
26.Hard worker: Usually does it the hard way.
27.Identifies major management problems: Complains a lot.
28.Indifferent to instruction: Knows more than superiors.
29.Internationally know: Likes to go to conferences and trade shows in Las Vegas.
30.Is well informed: Knows all office gossip and where all the skeletons are kept.
31.Inspires the cooperation of others: Gets everyone else to do the work.
32.Is unusually loyal: Wanted by no-one else.
33.Judgement is usually sound: Lucky.
34.Keen sense of humour: Knows lots of dirty jokes.
35.Keeps informed on business issues: Subscribes to Playboy and National Enquirer.
36.Listens well: Has no ideas of his own.
37.Maintains a high degree of participation: Comes to work on time.
38.Maintains professional attitude: A snob.
39.Meticulous in attention to detail: A nitpicker.
40.Mover and shaker: Favours steamroller tactics without regard for other opinions.
41.Not a desk person: Did not go to college.
42.Of great value to the organization: Turns in work on time.
43.Use all available resources: Takes office supplies home for personal use.
44.Quick thinking: Offers plausible excuses for errors.
45.Requires work-value attitudinal readjustment: Lazy and hard-headed.
46.Should go far: Please.
47.Slightly below average: Stupid.
48.Spends extra hours on the job: Miserable home life.
49.Stern disciplinarian: A real jerk.
50.Straightforward: Blunt and insensitive.
51.Strong adherence to principles: Stubborn.
52.Tactful in dealing with superiors: Knows when to keep mouth shut.
53.Takes advantage of every opportunity to progress: Buys drinks for superiors.
54.Takes pride in work: Conceited.
55.Unlimited potential: Will stick with us until retirement.
56.Uses resources well: Delegates everything.
57.Uses time effectively: Clock watcher.
58.Very creative: Finds 22 reasons to do anything except original work.
59.Visionary: Cannot handle paperwork or any project that lasts less than a week.
60.Well organized: Does too much busywork.
61.Will go far: Relative of management.
62.Willing to take calculated risks: Doesn't mind spending someone else's money.
63.Zealous attitude: Opinionated.

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