Wired Hearts (8) Updated Ch:61, Pg:37 |August 9th - Page 17

Originally posted by: PaintedSky

Right you are! After rejection heart may be protected from further pain or possibility of pain. But somewhere there remain a soft spot .... May be he had that for her. If not then, they are working together for sometime. May be that sometime would leave a possibility to re-create that " chahh"

Too much "may be" s.

But I'm  not so hopefull, that she will be accepted or be able to confess. Your title "wired heart" kinda freaking me out today🤔🤨😶. 

Hope you update soon, its so heart warming when you get acknowledged by your one of the fav writer. Its been like a decade we are together here. Sometimes feels like the writers of this forums are my soul sisters. Wish you best and love. 

Tha power of maybes is immense and very important in keeping up positive about the future!

Haha,! Don't freak out! Their hearts are wired - maybe together 😉

It is an honour to be called a writer and an even greater honour to be counted among the other greatly talented writers here! Yep, we're definitely soul sisters here!

Note: All the comments have been replied to in the previous pages. I am eternally grateful to all your presence, your comments and encouraging words.

Also, I'm a bit nervous about this chapter and the ones that follow. Would love to know what you think about them.

Note 2: I can't seem to attach links on the site. Can anyone guide? Also, can anyone let me know if I can attach a song or music to a post/page? A few chapters will only make more sense if I add the inspiration music to it.

Thank you everyone!

59. What Goes Around

It took me a few seconds to respond to his presence in any way at all. Greeting him, I sat down on a side of the bench I was standing near, leaving enough room for him. He looked at me and then at the empty bench space. He had clearly understood that I was offering him to sit without me having to spell it out. After a few long moments of deliberation, he stepped forward in an exaggeratedly slow movement to sit on the other end of the bench,  leaving a wide space between the two of us. He was on his guard, I could feel it.

Time ticked by and neither of us spoke, silently observing the empty park, the cars passing by or the pedestrians rushing back home, dark as it already was. A sense of tranquility filled me as I sat there. I wasn’t feeling nervous anymore and I let myself go with the flow.

“You know,” I began softly, raising my eyes to the darkened sky, “this time of the day fills me with a strange sense of sorrow...”

I could feel his gaze on my face.

“I can’t help this bittersweet feeling that something ends everyday... when the night falls... the end may or may not be good, but there is always an end...”

When I fell silent, an unexplained melancholy befell me. My heart was shrouded with gloom, for today was going to be an end too. A good one or a bad one, I knew not. He took some time to respond. Perhaps he was waiting for an explanation but I had none.

“Without an end to one thing, there would never be a beginning of another.” I glanced up at him to see his gaze fixated in front of him, his expression calm. “Without the night, we would never be able to appreciate the day. Without the dark, we would never value the light in our lives.” He stopped talking for a few moments, as if formulating his words. When he spoke, his voice was a notch lower, his expression a tad somber. “But if we lament the ends, we won’t ever be able to enjoy the beginnings which come after them.”

“Yes,” I agreed with him. “But it is easier said than done...”

“Hmm" was all he said before we fell into a silence again.

It took a great deal of courage to steer the conversation towards the topic I had called him here for but I knew I could not stall further. I inhaled deeply.

“Congratulations.” I tried to sound as normal as I could but it obviously did not come out as perky as the word was supposed to be.

“Huh?” He turned his head towards me, confusion evident on his face. “What for?”

As if it wasn’t difficult enough as it was, I had to provide an explanation as well!

“I heard about your... engagement...” My voice faded and I hoped the pain wasn’t too transparent in it.

“Oh!” It was all he said as seconds ticked by. “Thanks.”

I glanced up at his face. It did not give anything away but I was sure his eyes would betray him. If only I could get a glimpse of his eyes... if only I could gaze into the depth of his orbs for a few moments... As if my prayer got answered right away, he looked at me in a swift motion. Our eyes met. There was surprise in his, either at catching me looking at him or at being caught looking at me. His eyes had a magnetic force which held mine, rendering me unable to turn away. There was a spark in his eyes. Curiosity was burning in them as if he was searching mine for an answer. What for, I think I knew. And for once, I wanted him to see the answer in my eyes. As selfish as it sounded, I wanted him to read my feelings in my eyes so I wouldn’t have to go through the uphill stage of baring my heart – and being rejected.

I did not look away. I simply could not, for as long as he held my gaze. I was entranced. He still had such a power over me and I could not see this power fading away in the future as well. The future which seemed so obscure, so bleak to me. I did not realise how much longer he held my gaze but once he broke the connection and abruptly looked away, I gasped, as if I had been holding my breath. My heart was racing unevenly and my breath came out in short rasps. I tried to be quiet as I regained composure before either of us spoke.

Maan cleared his throat. His voice was flat, his eyes fixed on a point in front of him. “You clearly did not call me here to congratulate me.” He threw a fleeting glance my way before returning to his original point of fixation. “Although, I don’t believe I have the right to ask what it is.”

It hurt me to hear that. Clearly, it was the result of our last squabble. I wanted to say that he had every right to ask. I wanted him to ask. And yet I couldn’t, because I had been the one to erect that wall.

I sighed. I couldn’t stall any further. I shouldn’t.

“It is true that I haven’t called you here at this time and at such a short notice for the sole purpose of congratulating you.” I looked his way, maintaining a calm and soft composure. “And I truly apologise for making you feel like you had no right to ask what the issue was...” He turned to look at me and I could see that he had transported back to when I fought with him in the car the other night – and I had shut him out. “But I have something to talk to you about, and it has become extremely important that I say it, now more than ever.”

Curiosity started to leak through his mask of detachment. I continued with a combination of confidence and nervousness. “I.. I want you to listen to me with an open mind and try to understand why I chose this time to... to confess.”

His brows furrowed and my pulse jumped, although I did not let it show.

“Confess what?” His guard was up again.

Unable to stay in one place any longer, I got up from the bench and started pacing back and forth in front of it, Maan’s eyes following me all the while.

As I paced, I just forced the words out of my mouth without looking at him, for if I had glanced at him even once, I would have stumbled on my words and felt the gravity of the situation overpower me. So the words began to flow in the same pace that my feet walked.

“I know this is crazy and there couldn’t have been a worse timing for this but I just could not stay silent any more. I don’t want you to feel imposed or obligated or anything. It’s just that my heart has been burdened for so long that I cannot continue to function everyday if I don’t say it out loud today. I need to relieve myself of this misery. I just want to tell you how I feel and -"

Maan slowly rose from the bench and repeated my own words. “How you feel?”

His voice and his stance stopped me short. I stood a few paces away from him, suddenly uncertain whether I should continue or not.

“What feelings?” His question came out sharp, arms crossed across his chest. His demeanour reminded me of what I’d learned in body language lessons I'd taken a long time ago for fun.

Crossed arms typically signify a person attempting to ‘block out’ what he is hearing. It signals a person who is distant, insecure, defensive or anxious.

I couldn’t rule out any of the factors on the checklist which formed in my head on his posture. He had every right to check all those boxes at the moment.

I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, internally mustering up courage before finally opening my eyes and looking him directly in his so he could see how earnest I was in my words.

“I... I’m in love with you!” As soon as the words breathed out of me, I felt a strange sense of serenity dawn upon me. The words which I had not yet let myself say so freely rang with absolute clarity and truth and there was no denying it. “I love you, Maan!”

His arms fell limply by his sides, mouth open in shock. I didn’t know what he had expected me to say but it surely wasn’t this. He gaped, trying to formulate words as I waited for him to say something, anything at all.

“What?” His whisper was hardly audible.

“I...” I searched for words to express myself properly. “I think I’ve been in love with you for a long time now... I just didn’t realise it... I didn’t name it up until we got stuck back on the trip...”

Shocked, rounded eyes, dried lips and gaping mouth, he stared at me as I laid my heart bare.

“If it hadn’t been for the do-or-die situation we were in back then, I might not have realised what I felt for you... the tenderness, the attraction... the urge to want you by my side all the time... it was love... it was all my love...” I took a deep breath. “I can’t deny it any more, Maan.”

“But why now?”

I closed my eyes, having been suddenly pulled back into a dark memory from eight years ago. I had been the one to say those exact words when he had professed his love so long ago. What a game fate had played! It had brought us both to the same position, but the roles were now reversed.

“Why are you telling this to me now?” His voice was carefully controlled but his face had an increasing anger on it. He turned around and walked a few paces away before charging back towards me. “Now when you know I’ll be engaged to someone else in a matter of days?!”

I shut my eyes at it. I hadn’t forgotten his betrothal but it pained to hear him say it.

“I know this isn’t the most ideal situation... I may be selfish for telling you how I feel at this point and wanting to be accepted...”

He flinched, probably having been reminded of the one fateful night when his love had not been accepted – by me. He shut his eyes tightly, pinching the bridge of his nose. I heard him take a deep breath in before releasing it as he worked on bringing himself under composure.

“You are selfish!” He called out in a scathing voice as he opened his eyes.

“Hear me out first.” I pleaded. He didn’t respond. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked away from me. I could see he was clenching his jaw in anger but I knew this was my only chance to say what I wanted. “This situation... your engagement is almost like a do-or-die situation for me. I knew if I didn’t let my feelings out now, I would end up regretting it until my last breath. I didn’t want that to happen.”

“Like I said,” He turned to look at me, anger evident on his face and in his voice now, “you are selfish. You only think of what you want and don’t want without giving a thought of how it would affect others.”

“I’m not finished yet!” I spoke in a firm voice, effectively silencing him. He looked away again. As soon as I knew I had his attention again, I continued in a soft, convincing tone. “The point of confessing my love for you at this time is not for you to abandon this prospective engagement and come to me... As much as I’d love for that to happen, it would be the most heartless thing to do to another woman. I wouldn’t do that, even if it physically pains me to think that my love is meant to be unrequited.” I draw in a shaky breath, on the verge of tears.

“Then what is your motive behind all of this?!” He hissed, stepping closer in anger.

“I don’t know!!” I almost screamed,  my arms flying up in frustration. That was the end of my control and I broke down, bursting into tears. “I don’t know what to do!” Throwing my face in my hands, I sobbed while he stood silently. It was a few moments before I gathered myself and raised my eyes to look at him. With a blend of anger and pain etched on his face, he ran a hand through his hair.

“One thing that I am absolutely sure of is that I want you to be happy...” My chin wobbled and my voice broke. “I want you to have the best of everything... to have a life partner who will love you like you deserve to be loved... even if the pain of seeing you with another kills me!”

I bit my lip in an attempt to suppress the sniffles, to stop the sobs building up in my chest from coming out.

He turned around, walked a few agitated steps away from me and grunted. “Argh!” In a swift movement, he kicked a stone so hard it flew across the park. I could tell he was more frustrated than me. He was angry and rightfully so.

He turned towards me and reached me in three long strides, almost coming right at my face and grabbing me from the top of my arms in a hard grip.

“You know what?” His voice was cold, his eyes seething. “It doesn’t matter to me what you want anymore.” It felt like a bucket of ice had been dumped on me, chilling me to the bone. “Because you don’t matter to me anymore!” Something shifted in that instant. His hands released me as swiftly as they had grabbed me. The anger in his eyes was replaced by pain and his voice cracked as he spoke again. “Because you and I are not meant to be together!”

I closed my eyes, listening to my own words coming back to me. Tears streamed down my face at the words. The warmth of his body abruptly disappeared and I opened my eyes just in time to see him rushing back to his car.

Without another glance at me, he started the engine and sped off into the darkness.

Just like he had done so eight years ago.

See! They are broken.... 

Can't blame any of them. It seems he had moved on long ago .... He absorbed the pain within.

My heart is with him, again he is hurt more than her. Ease him. 

Chapter 59 

Painful Chapter 

Geet confessing her love to Maan

when she knows he is getting engaged 

after so much of convincing by his family 

but Maan certainly holds a soft spot for Geet

as he left everything just to meet her 

Geet confessing and Maan's anger , actually it seems like both 

are hurt yet at the same time both want the other to be happy 

I'm not sure but I hope if Maan is getting engaged 

than he should fall in love with his would be wife 

otherwise life is just empty 

but today I feel for Geet as well 

just hoping she slowly makes herself strong 

Beautiful but sad update!  But I guess this is what you were hinting at.  Maan has a lot of pain and hurt and has never overcome the rejection.  I guess he is now angry and frustrated and what’s to give her a taste of that hurt that he has been through for these 8 years.  I feel for her and I feel for him.  I’m sure he still loves her and eventually his heart will rule and not his brain. Thank again.

maan clearly is still hurt n no matter how much he denies he still feels for her.. liked how geet layed her emotions and how at the same time she wishes him to be happy... she took hell lot time to realize her love for maan though, its the time now she feels what maan felt for all those eight years ...the hurt..the rejection...but I wonder if maan would be able to get engaged now? i guess without geets confession it would have been easy but now? waiting for next please update next sooner

59

geet confess her love with very difficulty which is do or die time for her

maan left geet in anger like 8 years back rejecting her n reason behind her refusal in past 

Very sad update

like Maan said. Why now. Why did she have to confess now knowing he is gettin engaged. Was she hoping he would cancel that and come to her

he is so hopping mad at her but more so he is hurt more now and angry at her gur realizing so late and hurting him and herself for so long 

what’s the point 

he just repeated what she told him years ago

both are sad unhappy. Is this how he is going to start his life. That’s not fair to his new would be right

he has to let her go fully before he starts a new journey or do something different

waiting yo see what happens 

Don’t want them to hurt so much 

he is the one who is hurting once again because of her. But feel for her too 

Hi thanks for the pm and update

Chapter 59

Agonising update..... sensationally written

it takes much courage to confess

admire Geet for doing this.....

Maan was indeed on his guard

despite her pain, she did congratulate him on his engagement 

Maan seemed nonchalant 

so Maan hides his emotions well

at least she managed to read his eyes 

Geet's thoughts well portrayed

great that she managed to regain her composure

Maan's comment was reasonable

sad that he feels he has no right to ask her question her

at least she apologised

Maan's was clearly surprised 

Maan's demeanor was anticipated

good that Geet soldiered on

finally she confessed that she loves him

now she feels calm

well Maan was shocked 

glad that she was direct with him

not surprised with his question

she had a right to tell him what she feels

oh she thinks she is being selfish

pleased that he let her explain

however he feels she is just thinking of herself

nice that she was determined

liked that she want him to abandon his prospective engagement

Geet's anger was justified

loved that she wants Maan to be happy even if with someone else

Maan's frustration was understandable

Gosh he did reciprocate her feelings

Geet was certainly shattered

does she not really not matter to him?

did he really he mean that he and she are not meant to be together?

seems he was throwing her words in her face 

he did hurt her.....

she is now where he was 8 years ago

but this time he is also in pain

hate that they are both in pain

will he get engaged?

update soon

It took a lot of courage for her to bare herself. Its good she did do it. No matter what happens now, she will have no regrets. She needed to tell him, and he needed to know. Where it goes from here is his choice to make.