Posted:
Never judge a book by its movie.
- JW Eagan
"Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it."
- Cullen Hightower
"A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell."
- George Bernard Shaw
"If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day."
- John A. Wheeler
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
- Groucho Marx
My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
- Rodney Dangerfield
Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.
- Sue Murphy
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
- Doug Larson
I never know how much of what I say is true.
- Bette Midler
People often write me and ask how I keep my wood floors so clean when I live with a child and a dog, and my answer is that I use a technique called Suffering From a Mental Illness.
- Heather Armstrong
"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy."
- Ernest Benn
"In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known."
- Thomas Pickering
"Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done."
- Andy Rooney
"The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder."
- Alfred Hitchcock
"It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time."
- Tallulah Bankhead
"Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them."
- HL Mencken
"Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money."
- Joey Bishop
"The government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it."
- Ronald Reagan
"There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you."
- Will Rogers
"I hate music, especially when it's played."
- Jimmy Durante
Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
"I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them."
- Isaac Asimov
"There is only one difference between a madman and me. I am not mad."
- Salvador Dali
"If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?"
"The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side."
- Hunter S. Thompson
- JW Eagan
"Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it."
- Cullen Hightower
"A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell."
- George Bernard Shaw
"If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day."
- John A. Wheeler
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
- Groucho Marx
My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
- Rodney Dangerfield
Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.
- Sue Murphy
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
- Doug Larson
I never know how much of what I say is true.
- Bette Midler
People often write me and ask how I keep my wood floors so clean when I live with a child and a dog, and my answer is that I use a technique called Suffering From a Mental Illness.
- Heather Armstrong
"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy."
- Ernest Benn
"In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known."
- Thomas Pickering
"Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done."
- Andy Rooney
"The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder."
- Alfred Hitchcock
"It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time."
- Tallulah Bankhead
"Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them."
- HL Mencken
"Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money."
- Joey Bishop
"The government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it."
- Ronald Reagan
"There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you."
- Will Rogers
"I hate music, especially when it's played."
- Jimmy Durante
Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
"I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them."
- Isaac Asimov
"There is only one difference between a madman and me. I am not mad."
- Salvador Dali
"If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?"
"The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side."
- Hunter S. Thompson
Writers Corner: Books, Stories & Poems
