Trust in a broken mirror!
"I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't trust you"
"Ultimately it is the desire, not the desired that we love"
- Friedrich Nietzche
Today my thoughts are primarily around "Trust". When P asked V to trust her and give another chance he said you don't always get chances". So true.
We have often heard people comparing trust to a broken mirror. Why? Because a broken mirror will have a mark, it will never give you a perfect reflection. Similarly once a trust is broken, there will be a lingering doubt in that relationship always. Because the crack has already been formed.
Yet, I say. Trust can be rebuilt. It needs a lot of effort, patience and time. And most importantly a REASON!!
I'm upset too. Nope. Not because P got a firing she deserved it. Upset because I'm not getting clarity. Upset about the frustration of being in the dark without any line of sight on when and how we will see light. Every scene today was puzzling, creating more suspense around the characters
Frankly I was upset when Sai-V confrontation turned out to be a monologue. I was hoping for clarity. But then I looked at the scene again. V is stoic yet impassive. Sai needed answers. But these are questions that we as audience are seeking. V's actions are contradicting his words.Sai has noticed and puzzled and frustrated. Rightly so. Sai found no answers. Because Virat is a suspense. Like I wrote about earlier. His mask is yet to drop and his side of the story is yet to be revealed. Whether it justifies his actions or turns him into another mess is for us wait and watch. However, this monologue for me was not for Sai, but was for V. The masked V who is refusing to let out the truth! Here it shows Sai's distrust on V. He lost her trust when he chose P over her. Yet, she believed him. She believed his words. Had faith in his character. What made her do that despite being betrayed again and again? Reason - LOVE
V-P confrontation. P is terrified. Terrified of V's reaction. Terrified of losing his trust. A trust she has "presumably" earned after years of efforts and patience. She lost his trust once, and that had shattered her. And today she was terrified that she lost the trust she regained. Because her relationship was functioning only on that. Something discussed over an over again. P only loves herself. She will do anything for her happiness, even at the cost of the happiness of the love that is her happiness.
"Ultimately it is the desire, not the desired that we love"
If she truly loved V (desired) she would have wanted his happiness. But she only loves her happiness (her desire).
P lied, and continued to lie to V to prove that she didn't betray him. And she was happy in his happiness. The biggest lie that she didn't want to separate Savi from him, when she was conspiring to send Sai and Savi away from Nagpur.
She was terrified of V's fear and losing her image in front of him. But the actual impact dawned on her later. She had lost V's trust and that would mean she could lose him. That sent her from terrified to panic mode. She realised how her one wrong move can now cost her what she was trying to save.
Now she will be cautious. She will not want to do anything to anger V. Because now their relationship is treading on a very thin line. One misstep and she will fall off. This is why she tried to stop BK.
After repeated assurances why is P afraid of V going back to Sai. Because she knows that V still loves Sai. Yet she believes him and believes in that they can lead a normal married life. Despite all signs she still trusts V for his words "you are my wife". He has broken her trust so many times. Why does she still believe in a future with V. Reason - DESIRE
I'm more and more inclined towards P orchestrating the marriage clause. This is the second time she is pulling this card. Once of Ashwini and now on V. If she did this as repentance and selflessness, she would have recounted it. She has been playing on this gratitude and everyone has been singing that tune. But today, when she felt she was losing that grip, she is reminding everyone of it.
I would have been furious at the way V showed his physical dominance over P. Apart from that bit, strangely I didn't feel anything wrong. Because I believe in equality. If we expect a man to be punished if he has wronged a woman, the rule applies to women as well. See Karma does not come and drop the punishment at one's door step in person. There is always a carrier and messenger, who delivers it. V is just that. And it has to be him, because she is the reason why she has done those mistakes. She committed those crimes to get him. So her punishment should come through him.
But even if I leave this part aside, V as a father had all the right to question her. His anger is justified. She tried to plot against him to separate him from his daughter. Who wouldn't be? V clearly saw what P was trying to do. She was insecure of Sai and she wanted to send Savi away. She was clearly only thinking about herself, and didn't give a second thought to how V would deal with it. Sai was not there. But she was a witness to how V dealt with Sai and Vinu's loss. However, not once she thought what will be the impact of separation on V. How is V to forgive her for this? He spoke about chances and trust
Now my question is what did she do to gain that trust? She should have had to move mountains to gain his trust after what she did to Sai and him. Adoption could earn her gratitude. But gratitude cannot warranty Forgiveness or Trust. If he can't forgive her how can he trust her? P found Vinu and V found him through P. Destiny. P had no role to play. She helped him in adoption. Her choice again. Just like her choice of marrying Samrat.
I fail to see a "Reason" in this trust. And hence, I fail to see V's forgiveness and trust on P. NO REASON.
Now what is it towards Sai. If he does not trust her why was he following her to get his trust back? Isn't it the job of the person who lost the trust?
How should we define V's actions towards Sai? He speaks for her and her loyalty to the whole word and then threatens her to not conspire. Partial trust? Why is her threatening her, blackmailing her? He knows that Sai may love him but will not trust him. And he is currently not in a position to gain her trust. This is a mammoth of a job.
Reason - He does not trust her trust on him.
V has been playing on back foot for so long. But between yesterday and today he went on front foot. Taking it head on. Saam, daam dand bhed. Sab try maar lo. It seemed like a do or die situation. Frustration. Helplessness.
He thought that he had at least managed the situation with Sai yesterday..temporarily.
But he seems to have underestimated her. He was scared when she returned with all her might. But was relieved when he realised that if the threat didn't work the challenge worked. Now this makes me think. Doesn't V know V does not give in to threats? If she did not yield to GR, why will she give into him? His fears about revealing the truth had come out when he didn't reveal them to Savi when he got Sai arrested or when he visited Sai's place that night. Then how did he give those blank threats?
Or did we misunderstand challenge as threat?
He threw the bait and was anxious if Sai caught it. The doubt if his aim hit the target on not was evident when he looked scared and then relieved when Sai said she will not move out of Nagpur.
Now the word "teesri". I loved Sai today. She refused to bow down to V or the Chavans. She refused to be taken for granted. She refused to let her goodness to be taken for granted. They didn't deserve it. She had given them enough chances. But how she gave back the word "teesri" was epic. Till now she has been very respectful and never called this aspect out.
I'm reserving my thoughts on this for later. Because from yesterday to today there seems to have been a change in the version. But I want to stick to mine from yesterday.
Why do I feel we are being deceived again and again. There are double entendre everywhere. Giving clear indication of something through words and actions, but contradicting it when it comes to the entire picture...consistency.
Another example of this was V's expression while Sai was beating him left and right. It may look like a smirk. When Sai threatened to go to court and file for sole custody, his smirk can be taken up as a smirk. Looking at how he has been behaving in the past it can be read as his confidence in his power and position. But here, I felt it wasn't. This is again because we have to watch his expression in entirety throughout the scene. Where he is switching his expressions. He was happy that Sai is staying in Nagpur, the fire that Sai still had to fight the world (this again I will reserve for later), and the last smile with a tear was his pain at how low Sai now Sai thought of him. And he could do nothing about it. He earned it for himself. The deteriorating image.
Precap - P will not make another move. She is way too scared that she will lose her "desired". But then she has to. Only a fear that will make be bigger that fear of that risk. So V-Sai have to come together under some circumstances again to make P take another drastic step, another mistake, another step towards her downfall
Edited by Sherry24 - 2 years ago
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