#3 Father’s Day
“This is it for today’s lecture, for Monday's lecture I want you all to read from page 55 too page 109 and I want that essay on my desk on Wednesday next week". Priya said before she dismissed her class, she heard some of her students talk about what their plans with their father’s was as they packed their things.
Priya looked at her watch, usually on Father’s Day she would burry herself in her work, so she could avoid feeling the heartache she felt whenever she would see other families celebrating what she clearly never would get.
A father who loves her, a father who stays and a father who is good to his family.
For Priya Father’s Day was associated to pain, an ache in her heart that would never go away, she has no one to bake a cake for and make a card that says, “World’s best papa”. So, she buries herself in grading papers after lectures, to distract herself from the emotions she is certain the day will bring.
But at the end of the day, when it’s time to go to bed she feels nothing but loneliness and pain. Every year since she can remember, on Father’s Day Priya Sood cries herself to sleep.
She cries for the father she never got, the father she so desperately longed for and the father she got who will never waste an opportunity to tell her how disappointed he was on her, how he hated her guts.
This year so many things were differently, she was no longer Priya Sood who could burry herself in her work. As Priya Kapoor she was married to someone who adored his dad and knew how it felt to be the sun in your father’s eyes, but unfortunately her husband lost his father to soon. Priya bit her lips; this day was not only painful for her but for Ram as well.
Priya had no idea what would await her when she arrives home after work, will he want space or her company. Priya shook her head; the only company Mr. Kapoor would want on this day is the only company he won’t get. Priya felt a stab of pain in her chest, a part of her wants to scream at the universe for dealing her with such cards.
How will you comfort him, Priya? What do you know about father’s love, nothing? This day might be painful for you as well, but that don’t mean you can relate to his pain because this day being painful for both of you is for two very different reasons Priya.
Priya snapped out of her thoughts as her phone vibrated, Priya grabbed her phone and saw that she had received a text message from her husband. Seeing as all her students had left, she opened the message.
“Got a lot of meetings today, so I will be late. Well, more late than usual. You should spend some time with your sisters today. Can’t imagine today is an easy day for the four of you”
“Okey” she replied to his text, not having the energy to fight with him, but she is certain she won’t get any wink of sleep until she knows how he is actually doing.
Priya got her bag before she called the cab to go home, a fresh bath before she starts grading the papers sound like a good idea.
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Ram quickly sent Priya a text, so she won’t stay up waiting for him, after sending the text he placed his phone on the desk and looked at the photo of his dad. He sighed, it had been years, but the pain does not get easier. Ram still misses his dad just as much as the day he passed away, he just had to learn how to deal with the pain because he had younger siblings and a stepmom who depended on him.
Grief was something Ram was familiar with, when he had lost his mother, it was his dad who became pillar of support and strength for him, so when his father passed away Ram felt it was his duty to be his family's biggest strenght and supportsystem.
After his mom had passed away on every Mother’s Day his father would bring Ram to a beach his mom used to love, buy him ice cream and tell him stories about his mom. His dad would describe how her eyes would twinkle whenever his dad would buy her pistachio ice cream and that she was the biggest foodie. He would describe how his mom had the most beautiful hair and the patience of a saint, how his mom would help his dad with his lecture notes during college.
Ram got up from his chair, his eyes watering as he picked up the frame.
“Why did you have to leave too dad? I know you are with mom, but why do I have to be alone? I miss you so much. I'm trying to be strong for Nandini maa, Shivi and Shubhum and set an example like you. Truth be told dad; I just want to be with you and mom. What I would do for one more hug, one more advice, one more chance to hear your voices and laughter. I have forgotten the feeling of home, I been out of place since you left me."
Ram wiped his tears as he placed the frame gently on the desk again. Ram bit his lips, debating with himself if he wants to share the beach with his siblings. It was something between him and his dad only, then he felt guilty for thinking such thing. Shivi and Shubhum was his siblings,it was their dad too and he should invite them to go to the beach with him so they can all celebrate Father’s Day together.
Ram quickly sent texts to the family group chat, telling Shubhum and Shivi to join him for the beach before going back to work on the file on front of him. He had made the decision he would finish his work earlier, go to the beach with his family and remember his dad.
Twenty minutes later his phone buzzed, Ram felt a sinking feeling in his stomach as he went to look on his phone. There it was the feeling of loneliness creeping in on him again. Shivi and Shubhum had plans, which was clearly more important than celebrating Father's Day. Ram turnned off his phone, before grabbing something from his desk alongside the car keys.
Ram took of his shoes as he enters the beach and walks on the sand with a small smile on his face. Looking around the beach, he sees a few people. There is an elder couple sitting on the bench holding hands watching another family playing with their daughter and son with a sheer smile on their face. Ram turned his attention to the ice cream stall where he saw to teenagers sharing an ice cream, beside them sitting enjoying ice cream was a pregnant woman with her husband patiently listening to his wife rant about something.
Ram felt his heart ache, all these people were in different stages in the life, but they were there with someone who mattered, someone who cared to be in the sun with them and to share a moment of life with them. Ram looks at the beautiful blue ocean, smiling a little remembering how he would splash water on his dad.
“Is the seat next to you available?”
Ram looked up as he heard a very familiar voice, there she was standing in the heat the sun shining behind her so brightly. He gazed at her brown beautiful eyes, as If her eyes would tell him what she was doing on the beach.
“What are you doing here?” he asked slowly
“I think you forgot that Shivi added me to the groupchat last week, I texted you asking if I should join you on the beach when you did not respond I started to worry. Then Adi called me asking if you were with with me since you were not replying to any of them, so I figured you must be here....”
“Sorry, I did not mean to bother you guys” he said as he scratched his head
“You did not bother us Mr. Kapoor, your friends were just worried”
“So, are you saying you are one of my friends?” he asked her with a raised eyebrow before pointing to the empty place next to him on the sand as to gesture her to sit next to him.
“What you got there?” Priya asked instead of answering his question, pointing at the card in his hand
“You can’t reply to question with another question,Priya” he said ignoring what she asked
“You don’t have to answer Mr. Kapoor, I'm sorry if I stepped into your personal space” Priya answered biting her lips, an anxious habit of her when she was nervous or uncomfortable that Ram had started to recognize
Ram places a colorful card in her hand, it has a drawing of father and son on the beach holding hands looking at the sky which has a star on it.
“The first place I went to after my mom’s funeral was this beach, dad brought me here and told me that it was okey that I was sad and missed her. But that mom would have wanted us to be happy, happy for the time we got together and instead of feeling sad we could try to find joy in that we got to love her and be loved by her. We were on this beach for so many hours,we just sat in silence most of the day and then he brought me pistachio icecream just like he did for mom on their first date here”
Priya stared at Ram as he looked at the beach, she saw him take a deep breath as he saw a father hug his son and daughter after chasing them on the beach. Priya grabbed Ram’s hand and squeezed it three times. Her gesture was of comfort, her husband was certain his wife gesture was nothing but kindness, but she had no idea that she had brought up another memory.
“Dad, who confessed first?” Fourteen-year-old Ram asked his dad as they sat and ate ice cream after swimming
Ram looked at his dad with big curious eyes as his dad laughed before replying” I did, gosh Ram you have no idea how nervous I was. Your mom she was the most brilliant, beautiful and my favorites person and I was so scarred she would reject me. I also knew I could not spend another minute or second without telling her. So, I wore my best clothes, brought red roses the only one I could afford and went over to her place. I knew her parents had gone for a wedding, so we would be alone. I told her I loved her even before she could offer me a drink, I remember her eyes going wide and then I babbled nervously about how beautiful her hair is and how her scent is the sweetest in the world. Then your mom laughed, before squeezing my hand three times and suddenly the world was no longer spinning around me. I was calm, I was happy and at peace. That was her way of saying she loved me before she uttered those words”
“Here you go, Mr Kapoor” he hears an angelic voice snapping him out of his thoughts, he clears his throat and looks at Priya confused. His usual grumpy wife was offering him pistachio ice cream.
“When did you....where you not just here squeezing my hand seconds ago?” he asked flabbergasted
“Mr. Kapoor that was like ten minutes, were you not listening when I said I would get us ice cream”, she said rolling her eyes.
Ram took the ice cream she offered and took a large scoup of ice cream and ate it. He smiled at the familiar taste.
“Sorry, I dazed out. You know, Priya this was my mom’s favorite flavour and she was a big foodie. Guess I got that from her” he said softly
Priya smiled “You mom had a great taste; pistachio is my favorite too. I bet your is chocolate just like Sandy” she said softly
At the mention of her little sister Ram tensed up, realizing Priya had left her sisters to check up on him.
“Priya, you should not be here” he said quickly not realizing how that came out
Priya felt an unfamiliar pain in her chest, she bit her lip “I’m sorry Mr. Kapoor. This beach is clearly a memory you associate with your parents, and I can understand that must be very personal and here I’m uninvited” she started blabbering, so out of character for her.
Without second thought, his main priority just to calm her he grabbed her hand and squeezed it three times gently.
“Hey, I’m happy you are here Priya “he whispered gently, seeing her look at him with such uncertainty, he knew she needed more assurance.
“I genuinely mean it Priya, what I was trying to say was that I don’t want to be the reason why you are not with your sisters and mom today. You are not in any way obligated to look after me, to be with me here. I appreciate that you came to check on me, but you don’ t have to feel like you must stay”
Priya reflected on his words as she looked at their intervened hands, Ram must have sensed her gaze because he quickly pulled his hand away.
“I was at home waiting for you, I was not with my sisters and my mom. Usually, I just bury myself in my work and then…”
“Cry yourself to sleep” she heard Ram finish the sentence for her, looking at her teary eyed. Priya was hit with the realization that they were not so different after all. Both lived for their families, both hide their emotions from everyone so they could be the shield for their respective families.
“So, if it is okey for you I would like to spend today with you. We don’t have to say anything, we can just eat our ice cream in silence, and we can be here as long as you need to. But I don’t want to leave you alone, and I don’t think I want to be alone either” she whispered
“Since I told you a story about my childhood, tell me a story about Meera Maa” he said softly as he stole some of her ice cream
After many hours on the beach enjoying each other’s company, they go home ready to get some sleep. Ram lays down on his side of the bed thinking he did spend time on the beach with his family and share stories about his dad afterall. Priya and Ram, an unlikely couple two strangers who married for the sake of their siblings had become each other’s family. Ram played with his wedding ring, smiling to himself.
“Mr. Kapoor do you think there will be a day when we associate Father’s Day with more than just loss. I mourn for what I never got to experience; you mourn for losing the person you loved the most."
“I don’t know, Priya. You know what today told me Priya, that we don’t have to burry ourselves in our work and cry ourselves to sleep on this day anymore. We can lean on eachother, maybe that’s the universe way of gifting us after all the pain and suffering we faced”
“Are you saying we are a gift to each other?” she asked baffled
“In a way, I think you and I we have become family and to be honest I’m happy to have you be my family. What I’m saying is…”
“That I’m loved“ she whispered softly, tears falling from her eyes because how many nights had she cried longing to hear those words from her dad.
Priya looked at Ram as he wiped her tears, thinking how proud his dad would be if he could see Ram now being the man his father raised him to be.
The last thing Ram remembers before he falls asleep is a whisper” You are loved”, he thinks she is murmuring it to herself little did he know she was telling it to him.
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Priya smiled as she helped Pari and Prem put the frosting on the cake, she had made a chocolate cake with her two little helpers who were excited to surprise their dad. The chocolate cake had a blue frosting after Prem’s wish and with Pari’s handwriting “World’s best papa” written on it.
“Mommy, when is dad coming home from work?” Pari asked, not wanting to wait much longer to eat the cake
Priya chuckled, both Pari and Prem were fond of food,and she loved cooking for their family, it was her way of taking care of them, offer them her love and comfort.
“Your dad will be here in 5 minutes, are both of your cards ready?” she asked softly looking at their eager faces
“Yes, do you think daddy will like our card?” Prem asked her anxiously comparing his coloring on the card with his bigger sister's.
Priya smiled lovingly “He is going to love it and will tell everyone how both of you made him the most beautiful cards and when you two are much older he will remind you of those cards because he is going to keep them safe” she said softly before placing a gentle kiss on her son’s forehead.
If years ago, someone had told her that she would be celebrating Father’s Day, being happy on the day she once hated the most she would have laughed at that person’s face and probably said something sarcastic.
That was before she had fallen in love with her husband, who had shown her that a father can love his kids, love her and be good to them.
Minutes later her husband entered their house and was met with so much love and joy. A huge smile appeared on his face as the kids ran into his arms, shouting “happy Father’s Day” excited.
Priya placed the cake on the table and whispered ” Happy Father’sDay, Ram”softly, interlocking her hands under the table with his. Priya felt her heart flutter as he looked at her with so much admiration and love, before turning his attention to the cards his kids made while Pari and Prem was eating the choclate cake happilly.
Ram almost burst out laughing seeing that Pari had written “baby” on Priya’s stomach on her drawing inside the card, he need to do a better job pretending to be surprised when his wife tells her the news unlike last time when Pari had told Ram about Priya’s pregnancy with Prem before she could tell herself.
“What got you smiling so brightly ?” he heard his wife ask
“Just thinking about how blessed I’m, we really made it” he said softly
Priya smiled softly pressing a soft kiss on his cheek
“What was that for?” he asked surprised
“Just because I love you, also I need to tell you something later” she said softly gazing at him lovingly
“Mommy, do you think the baby will like chocolate icecream like dad or pistachio ice cream like you?” Pari asked with frosting on her nose looking so adorable Ram could not help but take a photo
“PARI KAPOOR”
Hearing her mom’s loud voice had no effect on the little girl who was quite the charmer like her dad and simply just fed her mom some cake.
“Pari, how did you even know? This time I did not even tell you” Priya said with a raised eyebrow looking at Pari
“You cried during a dog commercial mommy; you only do that when I’m getting a sibling” Pari Kapoor said giggling
Ram could see his wife eyes go wide open, deciding he had to step in before Pari is grounded for the rest of her life. Ram pulled his chair closer to Priya, placing his hand on her stomach and said “Hey little one, I’m your dad and I speak for your mom, your big sister and big brother when I say we can’t wait to meet you. I need you to do me a favor and tell your mom not to scold my princess”
“Baby, tell your dad I had everything planned until his princess ruined my plans “Priya said complaining
“Mrs. Kapoor everything about today is perfect, I would not have changed anything about today” he said placing a kiss on her forehead before taking his kids and his pregnant wife to the beach his father used to bring him too.
A/N : Sorry for any typos or grammar error. Would love to hear your thoughts on this drabble : )
