PKYEK - HOUSE OF SPOOFS | new spoof on pg 7 - Page 6

Originally posted by: Abhiya_cute

One is vampire, one is zombie in human form 🤣

exactly 🤣

pushing back to front page 😆

Authors: Meghana @simply.meghana and Nikita @abhaythevampire

Birdie tries Tinder: A PKYEK Spoof

Misha and Piya are passing by when they hear back to back chimes on Birdie’s phone, which is lying unattended on the nightstand.

Piya: Why is she getting so many notifications? *leans over for a peek*

Misha: I thought she didn’t have friends. Is someone texting her? 

Piya: OMFG! No, it's TINDER! Birdie is on Tinder! 

Misha: What?! Are you sure? 

Piya: Take a look for yourself. *she grabs the phone and holds it up to Misha’s face. Misha takes it and stares blankly*

Misha: Do you know her passcode? I need to see her profile. *she tries some random numbers but they don't work*

Piya: Maybe it’s some guy’s birthday? 

Misha: No no, it has to be something else….Hmm….how much did papa spend on her last wedding?

Piya: I think it was around 978000 rupees. I remember because I couldn't go to Paris for my model shoot… ☹️

Misha: Bingo!

*In the meantime, Panchi comes running to take her phone from them.*

Panchi: What the hell are you two doing? Piya, now that you can't do your jassosi on Abhay, have you started targeting me? 

Piya: We were just curious. I have never seen your phone have so many notifications before. 

Misha: Since when are you on Tinder?!

Panchi: You unlocked my phone?! How? And how dare you open the apps?

Misha: It wasn’t that hard. *shrugs* We all know how much you love spending on weddings. 

Piya: Speaking of weddings, are you in the mood for yet another one? 

Panchi: *looks down blushingly and dreamily* ……Maybe. 

Misha: Birdie why? Why? I got to say goodbye to the new seat covers I was planning to buy for my bike…

Piya: Bye bye trip to Shimla with Abhay. 

Panchi: You both are so selfish! What about my happiness? *starts uncontrollably sobbing* 

Misha and Piya: O_o We are selfish? We are not the ones planning our millionth wedding!

Misha: And papa is already upset with the expenditures last time. He is going to have to pull a Vijay Malya to pay for this wedding now. 

Piya: *imagines indian kids starving just so their father could loot the country to pay for Birdie’s wedding*

Misha: Let me see some of these guys. *she takes the phone and starts swiping left* 

Panchi: Hey stop it! *tries to snatch it, but Misha keeps moving it out of her reach*

*The doorbell rings*

Piya: You two continue….this, and I’ll get the door. It must be Tracker and Alina. 

*Misha and Panchi bicker about her phone, and Piya answers the door. The two are loud enough for the others to hear downstairs*

Ruhi: What drama is going on upstairs?

Piya: We found Panchi on Tinder!

Tracker: Really? Let me see! Let me see!

*Tracker runs upstairs and Piya and Alina follow behind*

Tracker: Misha, show me the profile!

Panchi: Not you too Tracker! 

Tracker: The whole world can see your profile on Tinder but not us?! What partiality is this? 

Alina: I wanna see! 

*They all snatch the phone from each other's hand, swiping left each time.*

Misha: Okay wait!! Everyone stop! 

*Everyone freezes. Misha brings her laptop and casts Panchi’s phone to it* 

Misha: Perfect, now we can all see it at the same time. 

Piya: Oh look, it's Pintoo! 

Tracker: Misha, do you want to swipe right on him on your profile? 

Misha: I don’t have a profile! Nor do I want one. A hard left swipe on him!

Alina: Oh Tracker, maybe you wanna swipe right now! It's Angad! 

Tracker: But this is Panchi's profile…

Piya: Maybe you can create your own!

Misha: Don't you already have one, Tracker? 

Panchi: Guys, what are you all doing? That's my profile and my phone! 

*Tracker swipes through more profiles, and stops at another familiar face*

Tracker: Hey look! It’s Sid! 

Misha: Oh this is getting fun! Birdie, what do you say, left or right? 

Panchi: *blushes hard and doesn’t say a word* 

Tracker: *plays ‘mann mein laddu foota’ tone on her phone*

Alina: That's a right swipe from Panchi I believe! 

Piya: *contemplates calling Abhay* Excuse me for a minute. 

Misha: *grins* Going to send this to your boyfriend? 

Panchi: *swipes right when everyone is distracted* 

Alina: I saw that! 

*Meanwhile at the Raichand Mansion*

Abhay checks the profile Piya shared and bursts out laughing seeing Sid on Tinder. 

Abhay: What happened big brother? Dehradun girls rejecting you so badly that you have to match with Panchi? Tune toh vampires ki naak kata di! 

Sid: She did what?! *grabs Abhay’s phone and stares at the screen* Umm…she does look delicious though! 

Abhay: *shakes his head in disgust and sees Haseena walking by* Hey mom, we need to make a profile on Shaadi.com for Sid. 

Haseena : *with a glint in her eyes* We do?

Abhay: He’s so desperate to get hitched that he matched with Panchi on Tinder. 

Haseena: Oh that's wonderful! A wedding in the house! Our neighbour, Sharmaji, keeps asking me when my children will get married, and finally I get to plan one. 

Sid: *rolls his eyes and tosses Abhay’s phone on the couch* 

Haseena: *sees Piya and Abhay’s picture on the lock screen* Oh right Abhay, let's get you two married as well! 

Abhay: O_o What? How? Why? When did I become your target? 

Haseena: Don't think of it as becoming a target. We’re simply saving money! Right, Chand?

Chand: You are all going to ignore my advice on not dating humans, so why even ask? 

Haseena: Come on Chand! Don't be a buzzkill. 

Chabd: Fine. As long as I don't have to give up my rooh afza, I really don't care. 

Haseena: I will call Madhu! 

Abhay: O_o I did not see it come back to bite me!

Sid: *falls of the sofa laughing*  

*Back at the Dobriyal House*

Madhu: Oh Haseena, that's wonderful news. Finally, I can get Panchi married and be done with all this.

Arnab: *sweating profusely* Another wedding? *checks bank balance on his phone; it’s close to zero* 

Madhu: And Piya as well? That’s even more wonderful news. 

Arnab: Ramu, call the doctor. I think I'm having a heart attack. 

Ramu: But sir, you don’t have the money for a hospital trip right now. 

Arnab: Time to commit some serious tax fraud then. *calls Vijay Malya for tips*

*In the girls room*

Misha: Hey Birdie look! I found all your ex-fiances on Tinder. There's Danish and that's Neel (his profile has picture of dog) 🤣

Panchi: *blushes hard and tries to unplug the laptop* 

Piya: Oh my god, you’re blushing. But how will you select one out of these three? 

Panchi: I—don’t know. 

Misha: Oh, I have an idea. Let’s have an online swayamvar!

Everyone else (in unison): Huh?!

Misha: Well…Birdie wants a lavish wedding, but papa is out of money. So whoever can throw the most Karan Johar style grand wedding, gets Birdie. 

Alina: I don't understand whether Birdie is a prize or a punishment.

Piya: Sounds fair. I’m placing my bets on Neel. 

Ruhi: *winks* Why? So the Raichand’s won’t go bankrupt and have money for your and Abhay’s wedding? 

Piya: *looks away* N-no…it’s not like that. 

Panchi: But Sid is richer than the rest right? 

Everyone: *stops whispering amongst themselves and all give her sly looks*

Ruhi: Oh….so you have a Sid bias? *winks again*

Misha: Then we don't need a swayamvar. That was easy!

Panchi: No no….I still want to see how far they can go! 

Misha : *creates a whatsapp group - Birdie ka swayamvar 🍋🌶🍋🌶* Attention, attention, attention! Papa has gone broke after planning Birdie’s last wedding, so whoever can plan the most lavish wedding for Birdie will get her hand in marriage. 

Sid: I don’t understand. What are we doing?

Danish: I will take out loans if necessary!!!

Neel: Sorry, Neel can’t come to the phone right now. He is busy breaking another bed! 

Panchi: *hides her face in a pillow while everyone else gives the chat weird looks* 

Piya: Oh no. I was counting on Neel, but Danish seems the most desperate…

Misha: Guys seriously, how can you prove that you have the capacity to throw the most lavish wedding party for Birdie?!

Danish: *floods the chat with old pictures of them and sneaks an image of his bank balance along with loan applications* 

Neil: *sends a picture of his bank balance, drawing more eyes than Danish’s, and then sends a stock image of a bed with a winky face emoji* 

Alina: *sees this and rolls her eyes, maybe even gags a little* 

Misha: Hmm….interesting. Sid, want to submit your proof?

Sid: *sends a screenshot of his bank balance without saying anything else* 

Piya: *fuming* Abhay told me they were struggling financially….liar… They are still the richest in the whole of Dehradun *texts him an angry message on the side* 

Panchi: Wow…..*starts daydreaming of the perfect wedding*

Misha: 🥳🥳 Sid wins by a landslide! Now come and claim your prize! Piya, we can finally order some pizza for tonight! 

Abhay: Sid, you stupid oaf! Dad is gonna kick you out again for spending all this money! 

Sid: *shrugs* I’ll just go be a ghar jamai or something. Or buy a new house. 

Piya: Maybe you two can go live in that ruined pandher palace which you were so keen on buying! 

*Metz got added in Birdie ka swayamvar out of nowhere*

Abhay and Sid: Ok, now who the hell added her?!

Everyone: Not me! 

*Abhay left the group*

*Sid left the group*

*Everyone left the group*

Panchi: But my wedding! *starts sobbing uncontrollably again*

Nikki can we get a title and index update plz? 😳

Originally posted by: simply.meghana

Nikki can we get a title and index update plz? 😳

done done

Originally posted by: Abhaythevampire

done done

thanks!  but it still says pg 5 in the title 🤣

Originally posted by: simply.meghana

thanks!  but it still says pg 5 in the title 🤣

r oh i completly forgot about title. Thanks for catching it. Done now 😆

Originally posted by: Fearless_Lover

Res. 🤣🤣

Yaad dila dena unres karna 🤣🤣

maate ab to ise unres kar dijiye. And lage haathon baki dono par b apni vishesh tippani avashya dijiyega 🤣

Oh god what did I just read 🤣🤣🤣

🐥 Ka swayamvar 🍋🌶️🤣🤣

The best was Ramu informing Arnab that he can't even afford a trip to the hospital 🤣🤣

Danish is still desperate to marry 🐥, Neel has some bedtod plans 🤣 and Sid is probably gonna get thrown out of the house for pulling this stunt 🤣

Aur Metz yaha tak bhi pahunch gayi 🤣

Originally posted by: White-Lilac

Oh god what did I just read 🤣🤣🤣

🐥 Ka swayamvar 🍋🌶️🤣🤣

The best was Ramu informing Arnab that he can't even afford a trip to the hospital 🤣🤣

Danish is still desperate to marry 🐥, Neel has some bedtod plans 🤣 and Sid is probably gonna get thrown out of the house for pulling this stunt 🤣

Aur Metz yaha tak bhi pahunch gayi 🤣

told u this was fun now read others too 🤣