Feeling very disheartened for Pallavi, DT Note pge 23 - Page 14

Originally posted by: joliefemme

I agree to your point in the context of the show. However, let's take some liberty here to show how despite all that it was still wrong.

Vaishali, even if she was in it for trapping Mandar. Let's say there was no act at play here. Still she froze and didn't do anything. She still cannot be blamed. PERIOD.

She's a harmless victim in all this who didn't call for it. She verbally refused his advances (should I say thank God for smaller mercies). She is not at fault.

Absolutely. This reasoning that " she is not weak " is itself flawed. Im sure most of us girls who are debating over all this, must have experienced some degree of harrassment or eve teasing in our lives. I know I have. Does that mean we are weak or we gave the impression that we wanted it to happen? No! But it still happened and for no fault of ours. Its very easy to say things in the virtual world hidden behind anonymous identities but in real world worse happens and it happens irrespective of how weak or strong the woman is or what stature she has in the society. People need to be sensible and sensitive when talking about these things.

Originally posted by: Isamreen

What Pallavi has to go through today was disheartening to say the least..

Mandar the creepy psycho... He crossed all the limits today..

Isn't it an occasion to feel victorious, after all she deserves this for not listening to Raghav

After all it's the karma hitting her back... ( This is sarcasm)

Blaming and Shaming her for not reacting or slapping mandar

Bashing her coz she didn't recognise Raghav..

And she needed to say THANK YOU to Raghav or shall I say SWAPNIL for saving her 👏ofcourse no courtesy pall how can you be so disrespectful..

I am really disheartened for the amount of victim blaming and Shaming going on here...

She was frozen to her wits, seeing his psycho behaviour..

Like us all she was shocked, she never thought that Mandar can stoop so low..

If you really see her face it will give you goosebumps..

It's not like she was standing and letting it happen..

She was LOOKING at him, looking at his creepiness in full front..

Looking at him looking at her scandalizingly..

So many emotions, she felt scared, angry, repulsive, helpless..

I am sure if not CV has to make to make a point of what length Mandar can go to Raghavi she would have reacted, she was processing...

It was to be shown to Raghav how biggest a creep can be Mandar and he needs to gather his wits and stop playing silly games..

It was to show to Pallavi to be careful around him, to what extent Mandar can go to harass her...

Coming here all I see is bashing pall even for this,

Cut her some slack pls, try to be more neutral in your views..

Remove that hatred glasses for her and see, it's not that difficult..

I decided to not come in MF and involve in anything going on, coz I don't have time and energy to simply argue with ppl who are not ready to listen..

But this thing got me highly upset..

Lovely post Samreen👍🏼👍🏼

Saw the epi just now....

What I noticed was...she got scared & shocked by his sudden appearance😡😡 & she got freezed by that shock...the shiver in her eyes were clearly visible😭...poor girl..

Raghav came at right time to save her😊

Originally posted by: MistyDawn

Absolutely. This reasoning that " she is not weak " is itself flawed. Im sure most of us girls who are debating over all this, must have experienced some degree of harrassment or eve teasing in our lives. I know I have. Does that mean we are weak or we gave the impression that we wanted it to happen? No! But it still happened and for no fault of ours. Its very easy to say things in the virtual world hidden behind anonymous identities but in real world worse happens and it happens irrespective of how weak or strong the woman is or what stature she has in the society. People need to be sensible and sensitive when talking about these things.

I totally agree. A victim is a victim irrespective of what she did or didn't do, wore or didn't wear etc.

I'm lucky that the harassment was mild (which happens to most of us) but I didn't react. Not because I was weak or because I was young. I didn't react (no reason is required) - this was a fact. I've gone back thinking multiple times what if, but it doesn't change the fact that it was wrong.

I didn't deserve the harassment nor does any person (man or woman) who goes through it (whether they freeze or take action) however mild or severe it is.

Nothing proves who is strong or weak.

Originally posted by: joliefemme

I'm impressed by all your responses today. Seriously look at the posts where people are talking about weak women as if it is their fault. No one should be harassed - men as well as women.

This is wrong on so many levels and to think of there being real people out there facing this on a daily basis. Pallavi is a fictional character jiske liye we get so tensed, I can't even fathom how difficult situations are for real victims.

Thank you. I’m so glad that most of the people here have similar thoughts.

Today I guess I got so worked about because it was no longer about a character but rather about the mindset that people have. I feel bad for all the real victims here who may have had to watch the scene, read all posts in today’s forum and deal with such people in real life.

Originally posted by: joliefemme

I think some people like to rile others because I really can't believe this is the thought process of someone.

I get it you love Raghav and P has done many mistakes and she may be a wrong life partner for him. Heck, she may even be a criminal but still she doesn't deserve to be harassed.

Like I've said I'm going to abuse the report button khushi se... Let the moderators deal.

Now there’s a separate topic on this , saying that she is encouraging him.

Honestly does reporting work? I see such posts every alternate day here. This forum is number one because of such posts ? Sick!

Originally posted by: Couch.Potato

Now there’s a separate topic on this , saying that she is encouraging him.

Honestly does reporting work? I see such posts every alternate day here. This forum is number one because of such posts ? Sick!

I dont know who you are but your views resonate mine. There are too many negative posts by a very few people . If the sensible ones counter such posts or make positive posts the toxicity will eventually reduce. Isn't it in our hands to reduce the toxicity. If we don't take any action or even report, we are to blame for it to a certain extent.

Since morning I've been responding to so many posts victim blaming coz I feel it is important to raise your voice. I spent 1.5 hour speaking to my friend (tagged) and she played the devil's advocate for me. This is a very sensitive topic and trust me these views wouldn't be the same if not for the anonymity IF provides

Originally posted by: hapc

Thank you. I’m so glad that most of the people here have similar thoughts.

Today I guess I got so worked about because it was no longer about a character but rather about the mindset that people have. I feel bad for all the real victims here who may have had to watch the scene, read all posts in today’s forum and deal with such people in real life.

I was on leave today so I could respond. While I feel it could be a waste of my time, I come from the same thought process. Pallavi is a fictional character but the issue is relevant. The makers are bold enough to portray this however difficult it is to digest, isn't it a reality of life?

It causes us anxiety coz it can happen to the best of us.

Yes the mindset of few people (majority did call out the victim blaming) is appalling. Use the report button and let the mods deal. Victim blaming is against forum rules

Originally posted by: joliefemme

I agree to your point in the context of the show. However, let's take some liberty here to show how despite all that it was still wrong.

Vaishali, even if she was in it for trapping Mandar. Let's say there was no act at play here. Still she froze and didn't do anything. She still cannot be blamed. PERIOD.

She's a harmless victim in all this who didn't call for it. She verbally refused his advances (should I say thank God for smaller mercies). She is not at fault.

I completely agree with what you are saying here. If only all this attention was given to the perpetrator and punishing that person instead of the victim who was caught off guard.

The fact that the 'she was asking for it' mentality is still rampant in 2021 just shows that while we've made progress as a society on many fronts, these notions aren't archaic after all.

While it's important for women to be careful about their safety when they are out and about alone, it's much more important to educate boys and men on what boundaries are and how to respect the concept of 'consent'. They have no right to infer or assume what a woman wants or doesn't. The default should be NO until she tells you otherwise explicitly (and not under duress).

Originally posted by: inlieu

I completely agree with what you are saying here. If only all this attention was given to the perpetrator and punishing that person instead of the victim who was caught off guard.

The fact that the 'she was asking for it' mentality is still rampant in 2021 just shows that while we've made progress as a society on many fronts, these notions aren't archaic after all.

While it's important for women to be careful about their safety when they are out and about alone, it's much more important to educate boys and men on what boundaries are and how to respect the concept of 'consent'. They have no right to infer or assume what a woman wants or doesn't. The default should be NO until she tells you otherwise explicitly (and not under duress).

What a well put out post. You know as they say when you blame the victim you enable the perpetrators.

Originally posted by: -abz-

Abi look at you write so nicely jo ek chota baccha bhi samaj jaye but what to do some people are beyond reason... Even if M does the worst to her and she didnt react it is still not her fault. You know suddenly I have the urge to watch PINK. It is on topic and covers these points.

Yeh le 🤗