what a wonderful and on point write up Uma from patriarchal mindset in subcontinent , to men gaining maturity later n how both of them fit to the T, each meeting the unmet need in other . It was an absolute treat to read . I would love to read your write-up on suitability of child woman for him as that was my notion too😊Age is surely just a number. I wrote “age gap”. Let me see if I can put it across right since I managed to ambiguate myself by not elaborating earlier- apne hi pair pe kulhari 😆.
What I have found having worked on many relationships and comparing it with historical ones in the subcontinent is that the age gap plays a significant role in Indian relationships since whether we like it or not, we are a subconsciously patriarchal society. The age gap adds a further element of respect to fostering and sustaining the love, especially where the requirement at one end is to be guided.One of the reasons researchers/psychologists state for the failure of modern day relationships in the subcontinent besides women’s empowerment etc is the narrowing age gap between spouses (especially where both are under 30) which has an inadvertent impact on the element of female attitude to the institution of marriage. I know this can be read grossly wrong, but I belong to the school of thought that feels that either of the spouses in a relationship need to be leader and the other the follower by and large for the relationship to succeed. It’s a subtle thing, not in a military sense 😆
Many fractured relationships today have spouses demanding equality than maintaining this leader-follower dynamics (which is the way man has historically survived and evolved) and the consequences of that are for all to see in society.
Coming back to the original point, in individuals like Sana in particular who want to be guided patiently, an age gap is a huge bonus. Does that mean that every older guy would suit her? No way 😆 Does that mean a younger guy couldn’t have patience? No to that too 😆 But generally speaking, men mature late in life in terms of life focus and several other parameters. Siddharth anyway, being this unique man child though, fits her to the T. Also, I haven’t gone into the side of things where a child woman alone would have suited him 😆
I won’t go into the dynamics of my own relationship and its high similarity to SidNaaz’ which I had once elaborated very long back on BB forum threads, but suffice to say the needs are very same at both ends and with them, as in my family, the age-gap helps among a host of other factors like compatibility. SidNaaz is destiny anyhow like many other marriages made in heaven ❤️ 😆🤞
