CHAPTER 2
The incident of the hospital of 1 week back had been erased from Pragya's mind completely. She is right now hell busy with her research and studies, even thinking to call off the work of clinic to pay full attention on the heavy-weighted journals, so it was obvious that the incident will go away from her brain easily; but the moment the receptionist of the clinic told her the name of the visitor, she got a little shock!
"Please come in Mr. Sengupta, I seriously had not expected you in this clinic ever. Pragya welcomed as the visitor sought her attention to enter the room. He sat on the chair before her and smiled a very decent smile.
"You are looking fresh. Pragya stated.
"Yes, I am quite better now, both physically and mentally. First of all thank you very much for trying to help me out that day, and also I am very sorry for wasting your valuable time by keeping you sat for a long time without any fruitful result! He spoke up with a decent smile, and Pragya got the chance to hear his real voice today. He has a gentle style of delivering words, and a very soothing attitude which is very attractive. Pragya was right that day, he is indeed very charming persona, and good-looking too. The normal grace of his smile has come back in his face today; that has made his sharp features more enchanting and graceful. Pragya smiled looking at him.
"Your presence here is the greatest award for me, no doubt! It's great to see you to come in my chamber on own feet and talking with me so normally! She said. "Your smile says that you are fine now!
Rohan seemed to be unmindful for a moment; his eyes were gazing at the designer paper-weight on the table. He started talking without picking up the eyes, avoiding the direct eye-contact of Pragya. "I am not fine Madam, the problem is still with me, killing me from inside! he uttered in a low voice along with a heavy-hearted sigh!
"What is your problem say me. She placed her folded hands on the table and asked. So Sen sir was true. He had to come to her only!
"I... Rohan hesitated to start. Accidentally his eyes caught her sight for once and again he found his brain-cells to become overactive. The beautiful face of the same woman again started floating in front of eyes. To avoid the unpleasant incident which he has faced a lot of time publicly, he immediately closed his eyes and remained silent.
"Mr. Sengupta? Pragya called him. She was recalling the methods that she has to apply now to understand his problem. There is a lot of process to figure out the actual problem of any mentally-stressed person. "You need not to worry Mr. Sengupta; she said. "Just fill up this one for me... she gave him a form consisting of some normal questions to understand a man's mental condition. Rohan looked at the paper for a minute, perhaps went through some of them, then smiled without picking eyes.
"I can do it, but I fear they will not be beneficial for you to understand my problem. It is somehow... He paused. "Somehow very... very weird!
Pragya sharpened her eyes. "You attempted suicide due to the mental stress of losing job and break-up...
"All are getting wrong at the same point. He smiled. "My problem does not start along with losing the job or cancelation of marriage... In fact they are the mere results of my original problem...just the way I got impulsive that day and only for sleeping peacefully I took overdose of sleeping-pills!
Pragya did say nothing, only kept staring at his face attentively. He carried on. "I had expected to lose my job from long ago; it's their kindness to endure me for so long. And neither I blame Trina, I mean my ex, as it is not at all possible to live the whole life with an insane- as she termed me- well, I have nothing to protest her, as I cannot deny her allegation! However, he was going on very calmly, but the droplets of sweat on face and the frowns were stating his excitement and disgust. "The co-incidence is everything happened together; and suddenly I felt too tired, highly needed sleep! I could not control my greed to gulp tablets in a go to have a sound sleep! Believe me, he smiled again. "I was not intending to die so easily, I know I am too coward to think that even!
"Why would you even think of dying? Pragya exclaimed! "However, what makes you think that you are mentally sick? she asked directly picking a point from his statement without applying sugarcoat of words on that.
"Sometimes I lose myself! he exclaimed.
"Sorry?
"Yeah! I lose my identity, my surroundings, my whereabouts... all my entity and... he looked a bit restless. "Don't know... I feel I am a completely different persona... also some memories... some very very old memories haunt me- day and night everywhere...I try hard to match myself with those but... He put palms on his face suddenly.
"What type of memory? Of your childhood? Pragya was quite astonished. She had never heard of such a disorder.
"No! I can never have those memories in my life... he gulped. "They are too old... I see people in kingly attire roaming around me, I see myself sitting on a ravishing palace, maybe on a great throne sometimes... I...I don't know!
"Are you very imaginative? Watch Historical movies or read fictions too much? Pragya asked.
"Not at all. I read nothing other than technical articles and newspaper. And I am not fond of movies, had to see sometimes on request but... I am too much a practical man I think!
"Hmm! Pragya nodded, though she had hardly understood anything. "Do you try to connect yourself with those dreams- or memories?
"I don't want to... but it happens! He exclaimed. "Just like it happens when a very old memory haunts you, and you try to remember it even without your wish, it happens with me too! Along with the flashback of those memories, my control over my sense loses automatically... I forget the fact that I am Rohan Sengupta... I forget my entity- my sense sinks in a deep sea of blank thinking- who am I... who am I...And! He stopped to breath!
"And?
"A strange but tormenting headache starts- it feels that someone is hammering inside my head- I feel vulnerable then- feel to chop off my head... that ache does not allow me to work properly, to sit peacefully or even to sleep!
"Haven't you consulted any doctor? Pragya asked.
"I did. I was checked up by a famous neurologist thoroughly I have no problem physically. He had no answer of this headache so had prescribed sleeping-pills- that I had used that day! He chuckled helplessly! "And two days before losing my job I even went to a psychiatrist passing through all kind of dilemmas but he also could not say anything rather than prescribing some pills of reducing mental stress!
"And today you came to me who has no experience at all? She smiled lightly. "I am really confused with your problem, but I will try to help you by every possible means. I can take you to Dr. Sujoy Sen if I cannot do anything- he is my teacher. She was not consoling him, she really wanted to help him. At last he was the only patient who has come to her with so much dependency!
"I know! I know that it is only you who can help me... His voice seemed a bit different now; a bit huskier and confident!
"How? she smiled. He did not answer, only sighed. His silence came with a new meaning to Pragya. This guy had responded peculiarly just after getting her touch that day; today he is avoiding her direct eye-contact but has come to her only leaving all the renowned psychologists of the city. What is the case?
"Are you hiding something? she asked.
Rohan picked up his eyes and looked at her eyes at once... the same eyes- the same bow of lips- the same glossy cheeks... but still entirely a different lady... He has no option but to believe that she is the only key of all his mysterious problems. But how would he say to an unknown respectable woman that he uses to see her face all the time in his dreams?
"Well, let us discuss on your flashbacks elaborately. So what type of clips flashes in front of you most of the time? She changed the question.
"A face! He exclaimed unmindfully.
"Face? Whose? Pragya asked.
"A very beautiful face- with bright hazel eyes... like a stream in moonlight... he seemed to be mesmerized in his dreamland, and hence he waved the second question- whose face is that!
"Okay! Pragya smiled seeing him. "From when are you having these problems?
"From 1-2 years... no... he was confused... "From long ago... I have to state you the whole story from first then...
Pragya looked at her wristwatch. Her time is over. This clinic is attached with a medical shop, and a lot of doctors sit here in scheduled time... Her subject is the least important one, and she has a lot of studies too, so she does not sit more than 4 hours. She will open her private chamber once she completes PhD while continuing her work with Dr. Sen... only this trouble of marriage is hanging on... whatever... she looked at Rohan.
"But today I am running short of time. Can you please come to my home? Here have a lot of distractions... She told.
"Your home? When?
"The phone no. is in my card. Ring me tomorrow evening, I will tell you. I am giving you the address.
"Okay I will. He looked a bit disheartened, but wiped that with a decent smile. "Thanks a lot Dr. Mukherjee for giving time...
"May I tell a thing? Pragya smiled. "Please avoid this term Dr. Mukherjee ... It's too heavy! You can call me by name. Pragya.
"Oh! He smiled back. "Okay, Dr. Pragya... I am Rohan, as you know.
"Okay Rohan. I will see your path. Pragya smiled.
500