Laughs -- Lawyer Warning Signs

Page

Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Warning Signs that you Might Need a Different Lawyer

He tells you that his last good case was a Budweiser.

When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.

He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."

He tells you that he has never told a lie.

A big sign in his office says: "Don't ask me."

A prison guard is shaving your head.

Quote

Frequent Posters

Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to turn in a light bulb?

A: None, lawyers only flee us.

Edited by Manzz - 17 years ago

Quote

Looks like you are new here. Register for free, learn and contribute.

Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Three. One to do it and two to sue him for malpractice.

Quote

Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Fifty four. Eight to argue, one to get a continuance, one to object, one to demur, two to research precedents, one to dictate a letter, one to stipulate, five to turn in their time cards, one to depose, one to write interrogatories, two to settle, one to order a secretary to change the bulb, and twenty-eight to bill for professional services.

Quote

Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

How lawyers do it...

Lawyers do it with appeal.

Lawyers do it confidentially.

Lawyers do it on a trial basis.

Lawyers do it until justice prevails.

Lawyers do it as long as you can pay them.

Lawyers do it unless it is prohibited by law.

Quote

Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

You Might Be a Lawyer if...

you are charging someone for reading these jokes.

you believe that a forty words' sentence is a short one.

you have a daughter named Sue and a son named Bill.

you can look at a contract and instantly tell whether it's verbal or written.

your other car is a BMW.

when you look in a mirror, you see a lawyer.

when your wife says "I love you," you cross-examine her.

Quote

Laughs -- Lawyer Warning Signs

Related Topics

Explore Topics