Samaina FF: Love in Mt. Abu - Page 13

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Samaina_1990 thumbnail
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Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: Dr.Don

Hi Sam,

Part 10: Super update.

To speak the truth, I enjoyed it more than the show itself currently.

Perfect Grammar, writing flow and connect.

That's what the show needs to depict. Sameer being Sorry because he is in LOVE with Naina not just because he is guilty. His asking for forgiveness just for his guilt is selfish as he is again only concerned for his feeling of guilt and wants to get rid of it.

But the way you wrote - it's clear he is guilty and MADLY & DEEPLY in love with Naina.

Kudos and cheers!


Thanks Doc!! 😃 To be honest, that is what I want to see in the show- Sameer being guilty, but also head over heels in love with Naina...saying sorry about his mistake is one thing, but not being able to live without her is another- Sameer needs to do both! 😕
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Posted: 7 years ago

Thank you Nida...I've bookmarked a few FF as well...your stories being one of them...would read them all as I get time...😊
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Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: Anjali33

Oh my God!! This update touched my heart

I liked Vishakha's entry probably for d first time😆
Hopefully she's happy wid d changes Naina has brought in Sameer.. unintentionally though😊
Nanu is so cute..teasing Sameer😳
OMG, Sameer hitting his palm wid scale😭 it hurt
The song..n the I love you..hayee
I can understand Naina's shocked feelings

Update soon


Thank you dear- thank you so much!! Your comments mean a lot to me...yeah I know we all can relate to Sameer's pain...😕😕 but I wanted to show that Naina still cared for him n couldn't see him hurt...that somewhere deep down, she still loves him...
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Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: braveheartdoc

nice part Sam👏

Enjoyed reading this a lot and i loved the teasing Nanu in this update... Vishakha seems to have changed and its so good to see her with sameer... waiting eagerly for your next part dear😃

I wish naina gives him atleast one chance😛

Thank you Manisha...yeah somehow I love Nanu teasing Sameer...that man got the wind of his grandson being in love before anyone else...he can read him like a book...yep Vishakha should act motherly at least once in a while 😆
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Posted: 7 years ago
Hello guys...ready with Part 11...dedicated to all my lovers readers! Let me know your reviews please 😊

Part 11: The Truth about the Bet

A few days later, Sameer was sitting in class during recess, contemplating on how to make it upto Naina. His train of thoughts was broken by the chit-chat of the rival gang. "Arey Romeo, tu to hume bhul hi gaya... smirked Pankaj. "Aur kya, hum kabse kainchi ki dhaar karwaye baithe hain ki Salman aayega aur apne baal katwayega, par tu to aata hi nahi re, quipped another guy. "Bhai ab to bahot romance ho gaya...drama bhi ho gaya...aur tune to khud hi haar maan li thi na...chal to aaj baal katwa hi le..., exclaimed Vijay. Sameer was enraged. "Tu to apna ye thobda mere saamne mat hi laaya kar, mere baalon ka to jo hona hai wo hoga, par teri shakal zarur bigad jayegi, Sameer roared at Vijay. "Aur tum chooze seedhe muh baat nahi kar sakte kya? Baal kaatne hai na? Kis shubh muhurat ka intezaar hai? Sameer Maheshwari apne promise se kabhi nahi hatata. Aaj school ke baad, playground me...3 baje, Sameer said to the gang and stormed out of the classroom. So angry was Sameer, that he didn't see Swati at the door. She came in as the rival gang left and looked questioningly at Munna. "Ye sab kya hai Munna? Ab kaunsa naya drama kar rahe ho tum log? she asked, livid herself. "Drama kya karna hai Swati, Sameer ne jo shart me haar maani thi...uske liye ye log aaj uske baal katenge. Bas... Munna explained, now visibly upset. Swati noticed, how these days Munna had become formal to her as well. She was puzzled... "shart haari thi? But Naina had told her that she had proposed Sameer. And hugged him too. And Sameer had said I Love You too' back to her. "Haan, Sameer ko Naina se I Love You bulwana tha jo usne nahi kiya. To shart haar hi gaya na! Pandit added, now irritated at Swati's dim response. Both Munna and Pandit narrated what had happened between the rival gang and Sameer during the Mt. Abu trip. Swati was shocked. Naina and Sameer had had a huge misunderstanding. So Sameer had backed out of the bet! Then why did he say those three words to Naina. And how come Munna and Pandit were not aware of it. She confided in them both. The trio was shocked. Then was it that both Naina and Sameer were still in love? Sameer had been ready to sacrifice his hair for Naina. He chose to lose the bet, despite knowing he had already won it! He had wanted to protect Naina's honour. He had wanted to be truthful to her.

"Sipahiii...Naina...sipahi...kahan ho tum...? Munna, Pandit and Swati were anxiously searching for Naina. Whatever be it, Naina had the right to know the whole truth. Naina was sitting alone under a tree, reading or pretending to read, but actually crying in the memory of her shattered love. "Nainaaa..., she heard Swati's voice. What was wrong? She stood up and saw her coming her way along with Munna and Pandit. The three looked extremely tensed now. "Swati..., she waved to her, irritated at why Sameer's friends were with her. "Naina...tu chal...tujhe bahot badi galat fehmi huyi hai, Swati panted. "Kyaaa...? she asked, tensed herself now. "Sipahi tu rona dhona band kar..., added Munna. He too was out of breath. "Maana Sameer ne tujhse jhoot bola tha...pyaar ka naatak kiya, par sach me.., Munna started to explain. Naina was indignant with fury now. "Mujhe us lafangey ke baare me kuch nahi sunna hai...chale jao yahan se...aur Swati...tu to sab kuch jaanti hai na...phir bhi uski tarafdaari kar rahi hai..., she shouted. "Naina tu please do minute shaant hoke hamari baat sun le, Swati pleaded. Then Munna, Pandit and Swati explained how Sameer had never told his friends that Naina had said I Love You' to him. He had lied about that night to Munna and Pandit and that no one knew about this, except him and Naina, till she had confided in Swati. They also told her that Sameer had decided to back out from the bet long back and tell her the truth. And that is why the rival gang was going to cut his hair after school today.

Naina listened; confusion, exasperation in her mind growing. "Swati, tu ye Munna, Pandit ki baat pe dhyaan mat de. Ye dono bhi usi ki tarah hain. In dono ne bhi uska sath diya tha, Naina told Swati. "Haan hum bure hain Naina, sach me bure hain. Aur sach maano to hamein tumhe taqleef pahunchane ka bahot dukh hai. Lekin Naina, Sameer ko jitna bura tum samajh rahi ho, wo utna bura bhi nahi hai. Tumhe pata bhi hai, kitna tadap raha hai wo tumhare bina? Din raat bas tumhari photo seene se lagaye firta hai. Na khata hai, na peeta hai, na sota hai. Jab dekho, bas Naina Naina Naina. Kya karein uska? Agar use tumhari fikr nahi hoti, to kya wo sabko shart puri hone ke baare me nahi batata? exclaimed Pandit. "Lekin maine khud suna tha us din Mount Abu mein...wo Pankaj aur wo log...unhone kaha tha ki usne mujhse pyaar ka nataak kiya, sirf mujhe aur mere pariwar ko badnaam karne ke liye, Naina protested. "Kya suna tha tumne...haan...kya suna tha? Now Munna was angry. "Kya tumne puri baat suni kabhi? Kya tumne ye suna ki Sameer ne unse kaha ki wo ab tumhara dil aur nahi dukha sakta? Kya tumne ye suna ki Sameer ne shart se haar maan li. Kya tumne ye suna jab Vijay ne tumhare baare me bakwas ki, to Sameer ne uski jaan lene ki koshish ki...nahi suna na...lekin jitna sach ye hai ki shuru me Sameer ne tumse badla lene ke liye shart lagayi thi...utna hi sach ye bhi hai ki jaise jaise wo tumhe jaanene laga, usne faisla kar liya tha ki wo is shart ko aage lekar nahi jayega, said Munna. "Yaar Naina, maana galtiyaan sab se hoti hain. Lekin agar Sameer sachha hai to use ek mauka to dena chahiye na...Main jaanti hun tu shayad use maaf na kare...lekin tu aaj bhi usse pyaar karti hai, said Swati. Listening to all this, Naina started remembering the past memories with Sameer. How Sameer used to accompany her to temple every day. How he knew that she was head over heels in love with him, but he'd never tried to exploit her. How he knew she was ready to say those three magical words to him long back, but he'd never forced her to do so. Naina couldn't take it anymore and ran away, leaving Munna, Pandit and Swati staring after her.

There in the ground after school, after everyone had left, the rival gang was preparing for their victory. "Ab aaya oont pahad ke niche... "Saala hero bana firta tha...khud ko Salman samajhta hai...ab banega bada wala zero... "Kitna mast hai...pura school hasega ispe kal..., they were laughing. Sameer came up from behind, listening to all those humiliating words, but chose to remain silent. He hardly cared for his own honour now. He had hurt Naina- he deserved this. He had no qualms about losing his hair. He knew Naina would have left school by now. "Abey hero, chal baith niche..., one of the rival guys pushed Sameer onto the ground. He fell down as they kicked him. Munna and Pandit came to his rescue, but Sameer stopped them with a gesture of his hand. This was his doing- he would bear it alone. Pankaj had the scissors...chalo Shree Ganesh karte hain...Sameer closed his eyes, now moist with thoughts of Naina. What had come over him to put a bet like this- one that would hurt the feelings of the one person he came to love the most in the world. Sameer could feel the scissors snipping away in the air with the rival gang's jokes on him. But his thoughts were only with Naina. He braced himself for humiliation. And then he heard the scissors go silent. He waited a few minutes, but there was no movement. He opened his eyes and saw Naina in the distance. She was looking right at him. Her eyes wavered over to the scissors in Pankaj's hands, over to the entire gang, lingered on Vijay for a moment and came back to Sameer.

(Dil mein ho tum aankho mein, Tum bolo tumhe kaise chahu, Puja karu sajada karu jaise kahu vaise chahu, Jaanu mere jaanu jaane jana janu...male version plays in background for Sameer). His eyes showed guilt, but there was a warmth in them, Naina had got accoustmed to seeing for herself. He didn't seem bothered by the cutting of his hair. He was gazing, dumbstruck, at her. He half expected her to come running to him and put her arms around him. But she did not move. Her gaze was different today- the hatred had lessened. Why? He didn't know. Pankaj looked back and forth at both Naina and Sameer. They had eyes for no one but each other. It was as if they were talking to each other through their eyes. Sameer's gaze was of guilt and apology, while Naina's was of confusion- as if she was still trying to decipher Sameer. Suddenly, Pankaj gave the scissors back to Vijay. He looked at both Naina and Sameer for one last time. "Tu bhi kya yaad rakhega...jaa maaf kiya tujhe, he said to Sameer. Sameer looked at him in astonishment, so did Munna and Pandit and the rest of his own gang. Naina became aware of herself and left immediately. Sameer's eyes followed her. Sameer got up and looked questioningly at Pankaj, "Kyun? "Kyunki, tere chehre pe likha hai ki tu sach me Naina se pyaar karta hai. Agar tu aaj bhi uska fayeda utha raha hota na to yakeen maan, tujhe aaj takla kar deta. But do pyaar karne walon ke beech me padkar paap sar par nahi lena humko. Tu dekh, tera pyaar dekh. Ye kissa khatam. With this, Pankaj left with his gang. Munna and Pandit ran over to Sameer and took him home.

***

Sameer was anxious to speak to Naina, post what had happened in school today. She seemed to have been a little forgiving, he thought. He dialed her number, but this time did not stop at two rings. Chachiji picked up, "Hello, Naina hai? Sameer asked, feigning a girl's voice. "Haan hai, deti hun...lekin tum kaun? asked Chachiji. "Main Naina ki saheli bol rahi hun, Suman.., lied Sameer in that fake voice. Chachiji put Sameer on hold and called out, "arey Naina, tera phone hai...bhagwan jhoot na bulaye...is ghar me main hi sabke phone uthane ke liye hu kya...ja jake baat kar le. Naina came to the living room, "Kaun hai chachi? "Teri saheli Suman! said Bela chachi. Naina was confused, "Suman kaun..., when Bela chachi said, "ab khadi kya hai baat kar na! "Hello..., she asked, "kaun bol raha hai? "Naina...main Sameer..., Sameer spoke in his normal tone. "Tum tum..., Naina was irked and was about to put the phone down, when she saw Bela chachi eyeing her suspiciously. "Haan...Suman...kaisi hai tu...bata na...tujhe mujhse kya kaam pad gaya ab, replied Naina. Sameer replied, "tumhare bina kaisa hounga Naina...I miss you, and then added in that girlish voice again, "arey Naina, maine suna tu Sameer se naraaz hai. "Kiska naam le rahi hai...achi baatein kar na..., replied Naina in a huff. Bela chachi was still watching her. "Dekh Naina, wo bechara tujhse maafi maangna chah raha hai. Wo jaanta hai ki uski galti bahot badi hai, maafi ke layak nahi hai, par tu uski baat to sun le. Uski taraf se bahot bada wala Sorry! Sameer said in Suman's voice. Naina responded, "Suman, wo notes, wo jo tu maang rahi hai na, wo main tujhe nahi de sakti. Mujhe nahi lagta tu use sambhal sakti hai. Chal bye. With this, she kept the receiver down. She couldn't help but smile a little at Sameer's attempt to talk to her. Sameer was dispirited, but at least Naina had spoken to him over phone, for the first time in a month.

***

At dinner that night, Vishakha was laying out the table. She was happily chatting with her father. Sameer came in and stopped at the door. He was amazed seeing such a scene in his home. Finally it seemed, he was with a family. How nice it felt to be a part of one, he mused. Vishakha was calling out to chotu in the kitchen, when Sameer heard Naina's voice... "Ji Mummy ji aayi... With this, Sameer saw Naina brush past him with a bowl of daal in her hand. She was looking ethereal- in that light blue sari. So simple, yet so beautiful! Her hair was open, flowing with the wind. The jhumkas he gave her were adorning her ears. And then he saw the gleaming mangalsutra on her neck. And that dab of sindoor on her forehead. He heard her bangles jingling as she fussed over his Nanu and mom. All three were busy talking at the dinner table, when Naina gestured to Sameer... "Aao na, tum wahan kyun khade ho? He barely registered his mother's voice. Naina came up to him and taking his hand, moved towards the table. Sameer followed her obediently and stood besides her at the table. He was smiling, looking at her- his wife- his Naina, beaming at him. He sat down, eyes on her and saw her breaking the aloo parantha into small pieces and making him eat with her own hands. "Sameer! Sameerrr...Sammmeeerrr! "Huh...? Sameer's trance broke. Sameer looked over at Nanu and his mom. They were staring at him. His mouth was open. He closed it. Naina was nowhere to be seen. Great, now he is imagining being married to Naina. And there she doesn't even want to look at his face. "Kya ho gaya hai Sameer...tum itne kahan gum rehte ho...kya soch rahe the? enquired his mom. Sameer just shrugged, "kuch nahi, and asked her to pass on the tinde ki sabzi on the table. Tinde had become his favourite these days.

Edited by Samaina_1990 - 7 years ago
dreamyp thumbnail
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Posted: 7 years ago
Imagining being married to naina waohhh cutest scene till now..Loved it alot..
Dr.DonnyJohn thumbnail
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Posted: 7 years ago
Super,
Going much better than the show itself.

Keep it going

Cheers!
SixteenAgain thumbnail
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Posted: 7 years ago
Another excellent update!

Really liked the scene where the rival gang guys finally saw the light and decided to leave these two to sort out things between them.

And Sameer's day dream!!! Super duper sweet :)

The story is coming along SO well. Loving your style of writing!
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Posted: 7 years ago
Sameer's day Dream was amazing. Something I hope to see in the show
braveheartdoc thumbnail
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Posted: 7 years ago
I liked how Munna and Pandit along with Swati revealed everything to her and she reached there just when he was about to face his punishment... 😳
Atleast through your fiction we could see the rivals having a good brain... 😉😛... loved the twist👏⭐️
Now even Sameer has started to say dream😉😆

Nice update dear... great going👏

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