**** Disclaimer: This is not meant as a Shivvay v/s Annika post and I would appreciate (with all that is happening on the show and on the forum) one does not make it that. Please refrain from posting if you are going to make any comments that are going to cause wars. I will personally request to shut down my own thread rather than have it turn nasty. So no bashing, no insulting characters (actors) and please respect everyone's POV. Feel free to bash the PH though ...lol 😉 ***
Kiss Haq Sey - What Right Do You Claim Over Me!
Deep ... very deep words and very difficult for someone to justify as an ex- husband. I do think he needs legal advice here.😆😆 Mishra to the rescue ... 😉
One often forgets that 'With Rights and Privileges come Duties and Responsibilities'.
Shivvay has always had that one thing over Annika right from the start and I had always made amusing posts about his invading her personal space even before they were anywhere close to being friends - HIS Haq over her. From, almost, the very beginning he walked around as though Annika and everything related to her was 'HIS Birthright' and came under 'HIS Domain and Jurisdiction'.
There were always exceptions to his rules where she was concerned. 'Annika Ki Baath Alag Hai, Jo Uskey Sasth Hota Hai Woh Kissi Aur Key Saath Nahi Hota' are his famous words. And he stuck by that always bending and breaking his own rigid rules when it came to her. That was again done because there was that unspoken connection that made him feel that there were haq's in place when it came to her.
The pool scene - the right to being familiar with her, the unofficial chauffeur - the right to be the only one who would drop her home, the Dev scene - the right to be angry and downright verbally abusive with her based on mere assumptions (we only do that with people we are very comfortable with), the watch that language' time and again- correcting her and reprimanding her even though she was a temporary person in his life then, The punching Bag - when all fails and there is no one else to blame find Annika and pin it on her (again that is done with someone you know will forgive and understand that you did it while under stress), The ultimate woman he looked up to - right to expect more from her even though she was engaged to Daksh and he to Tia, The sacrificial lamb- the right to blame her for his 2 runaway brides although he would have not married Om, or any other girl by force, had he said the same thing to Richa and she had changed her mind that day and I could go on... 😆
The point I guess I am trying to make here is not whether Shivvay is right or wrong compared to Annika, it is that he has always exerted the Haq that he has taken for granted all these months since his run in with her at the poolside that dark and angst filled night. He has always behaved as though he enjoys more privileges where she is concerned even compared to his other two brothers, who actually were the first to befriend her not him. And that Haq has never been opposed or taken away TILL NOW!!!
She never gave him the Haq as much as he assumed it was his, prior to him even accepting her as his wife publically. Annika always kinda went with the flow when it came to her relationship with Shivvay. She never questioned, opposed or tried to fathom it because it was always like one of those whirl-wind romances that come with a 'First Love'. It is all 'Heart' and less 'Head'. I am sure most of us identify with that phase in our lives where we just floated and got caught up with the tide and its strong pull.
With the forced marriage phase and few weeks after, she was more in 'Shell Shock', then came Daksh's revelation and his feeble attempt at an apology which was interrupted by Tia's attempt on her life and the Baby Drama and this ended with Daksh's blackmailing which forced him to face the ultimatum of whether she was his wife or not.
None of this was his conscious decision and made willingly. It was just something that led from one thing to another and even that was accepted by her because she thought 'love' and her 'firm faith in him to always do right by her' was enough to overcome all. She was confident, as she was proven time and again (Daksh part 2 etc), that 'Mere Shivvay Saab Theek Kar Dengey'. That his Haq' on her did come with Duties and Responsibilities towards her and he would never fail to read her true self and judge her wrongly.
But she miscalculated grossly because it was the very same thing that was her downfall. Shivvay trusted what he saw and she showed (the separation day), because he trusted HER implicitly. He never once thought that there was another reason behind what Annika was saying, taking everything she said at face value. He never expected his wife, who knew him so well, to play him.
That blind unquestioning trust became the double edged sword for both because Shivvay had become so lazy and complacent in his relationship and marriage that he never bothered to question 'Why?'. Why was she doing this now? Why had she changed overnight? Why was she ripping his heart to pieces when just a few minutes ago she was worried that her words from last night may have hurt his feelings?
He had taken it for granted that Annika would never let anything wrong happen to them. That was a gross miscalculation on his part, assuming that relationships do not need work and nurturing from time to time. Assuming that all was well with Annika only because she never openly complained or verbalized her feelings to him. Assuming that she bore everything with a smile meant all was well in her life.
"Tum Toh Khidiki Tood Annika Thi Ghar Tood Kab Ban Gayee?
He still has not gotten over the fact that she did it but he is also not realizing that she was out of character when that happened. His Heart has still not taken over completely because his brain is still looking for a logical answer. There is no logical answer for matters of the heart and Shivvay needs to understand that. He never had to because he had the tool 'Haq' to solve all those minor issues and deal with it.
And now that she is taking that 'Haq over Her' away from him he is struggling to understand the dynamics between them without that Haq.
She is forcing him to fall back on something else that he has to grasp at to hold on to her. He is going through cold turkey and I do feel for him because this is all that he knows about their equation from the start. He has never had to think of any other reason to behave the way he does with her or expect what he does from her except for the simple reason that he has the 'Haq' to.
His demanding the truth from her again is the 'Haq' in him. His wanting her to give in as she always does when he badgers and hounds her is the 'Haq' in him. His holding her arm, restraining and twisting it to make his point is the 'natural and old Haq' in him that makes him do that instinctively. His unconscious need to hear her say that she cares for what he feels about her marriage to Vikram is the 'Haq' in him.
But he has forgotten a very important rule about 'Haq', in his months of taking it for granted, and that is it can be exerted only over someone you have a connection and relationship with. After their divorce (that he claims has happened) that relationship has been nullified as far as she knows. So Annika has stopped using her 'Heart' completely and has, like a usual girl who has been through one bad relationship that has left a bad taste in her mouth, taken off her rose tinted glasses and is now not willing to settle for second best.
Cruel and heartless considering he had wanted to rectify the wrong?? Yes.
But that was not the issue in the first place? She did have a certain sadness about how their wedding came about but that was never a major issue between them because she did see his reasons behind what happened that day and she forgave him. She has always justified his actions and has taken the time to see the reasons behind them even when they have been hurtful (even to Sahil). Complete and unconditional love to a certain extent I would say.
Unusual for most women to do this with a spouse/partner with whom they have had a bad experience in the past?? No.
She could be going about it the wrong way (writer's sloppy work to be blamed for it) but it is not that unusual for one to be cautious and try to rectify the mistakes they made the first time in the relationship. The detachment and the cold and dead attitude towards him when she is being cornered by him I can identify with. That is her defense mechanism that automatically kicks in.
It is self-preservation at this point from what I see with a healthy amount of ego sprinkled because the issue is not that she feels Shivvay does not love her, the issue is that she feels he does not love her completely. He has done it in bits and pieces and has done it conditionally. Even now he is like a child who is not being humored anymore with her telling the truth, which is his Haq, but he cannot explain why it is his 'Haq' that SHE should tell him.
What Shivvay has to be now is someone who has to earn that 'Haq' that he always assumed was his 'Birthright' when it came to her. There is no connection or thread that binds them officially now and she is using that as her weapon (and I know it is downright dirty that she is playing that game) to make him come to the realization that he needs to understand why he feels that 'Haq' over her.
Again sloppy writing where Annika the character is concerned and how she is handling this. So I blame the writer for not bringing out the depth in this whole situation and making it a royal 'khichidi'.
He needs to understand that 'Love' for a person brings about that 'Haq' over a person. 'Haq' over their well-being, their attention towards them, their time invested in them and their unwavering loyalty towards them.
He has the Haq over his brothers and Family members by blood but one is never related to ones spouse by blood. The Children you bear are your blood but the woman that bears them is NOT your blood. Your Haq over her thus is purely dependent on you and how you form it. That Haq is a very fragile thing that needs 'Love' as a declaration to be it's foundation. Only then can you say that it is 'Love Making' and the children are borne out of 'Love'.
I know it seems like she is being hard and bull-headed about it and I am not saying that she is right but I guess what I am saying is that at the end of the day when the 'Haq' is taken away and he does admit 'Fark Padata Hai' what next?
Her Kiss Haq Sey" can then be countered by him by saying, "Mein Tumhe Pyaar Karta Hun - Uss Haq Sey", simple and straight Shivvay. Words spoken freely and truly from the heart without the mind processing them.
He needs to be the 'Heart' now that she is being the 'Mind'. Sweep her off her feet and don't give her time to think Billu you can do it!!!
Health and Fitness
Tum Se Tum Tak
