"Akash's daughter," Khushi interrupted, "I know."
Arnav staggered back slightly in shock, his eyes unblinking, and she could almost sense his thoughts scrambling about in an attempt to make sense of the situation, as his gaping mouth moved wordlessly.
She told him how she had connected the dots and managed to wrest out a confession from Akash.
Decidedly, he looked impressed, but for the most part, his expression remained poignantly remorseful.
"I'm glad that you know now," he said, slowly, in a voice strained by emotion, "But that doesn't really absolve me or justify what I did to you. I'm very sorry, Khushi. I know it's all been very hard for you... you really did not deserve to be treated like this."
Khushi wanted to ease his guilt and tell him, unequivocally, that it was okay, but with a heavy heart, decided against it. The truth was often inevitably painful, but, as she had come to realize through first-hand experience, sometimes, hiding the truth, even out of the noblest of intentions, could be even more damaging. She still could not define the nature of her relationship with Arnav, but if she had to, she would have liked the foundation of whatever it was that they shared, to be premised on honesty and trust. They owed it to each other, now, more than ever, to be truthful to themselves and one another.
"I'd be lying if I said that your silence didn't hurt," she said, averting her eyes away from his, so her courage wouldn't fail her, "I completely understand now why you said nothing. I really respect the fact that you were ready to go to such lengths to protect your brother, and I feel proud that in spite of everything... you brought Anaita home. I don't want to blame you, because circumstances were such... and from your point of view, it probably felt like the best thing you could have done. But I can't deny that I felt really bad at the time. While your decision may have been right for everyone, Akash, Anaita, Anaita's mother... it wasn't the right one for me."
"I know," he said quietly, and that - the fact that he did not come up with any excuses or justifications - made her look back at him with a small smile of gratitude.
There were still volumes of unsaid words that hung between them, but... everything in its own time, Khushi told herself. As it were, she felt too emotionally drained by everything that had transpired.
"I should go," she said, wiping away her tears, "They'll probably be looking for me. And I need to ask the driver to go and pick up Anaita from school as well. And... why are you up on your feet? Aren't you supposed to be resting? You still seem quite feverish."
"I feel much better now, promise."
She narrowed her eyes at him, as though trying to make out if he was saying the truth, before sighing, "Then, I guess... maybe you should check on Aka - on Jijaji... he didn't seem well at all when I left him."
A brief look of surprise crossed his face, before he asked, "Will you come with me?"
"I - but - I mean..." she stuttered, taken aback, "What will I - I mean, it's between you and him. I dont -"
"You have every right to be there," he said simply, slipping his hand in hers, as his eyes pored into hers with burning earnestness.
The gesture overwhelmed her, and she wanted to say something, perhaps signaling appreciation, but there were no words for the rush of warmth that permeated her senses then. She merely allowed her fingers to entwine with his briefly, and tried to blink away the moistness in her eyes.
There was hope, still, that the chasm between them could be bridged.
When they reached his bedroom, Akash was sitting on the edge of his bed with a blank, yet resolute, look on his face, but his lips curved into a small smile as he saw them enter together.
"Are you okay?" Arnav asked, his tone detached and formal.
For a long time, Akash did not answer.
"I will be if you forgive me," he said finally, looking down at his knees, "I should not have bound you by that promise. It was incredibly selfish of me. You did the right thing by telling Khushi."
"He didn't tell me," Khushi quickly interjected, "I was bluffing so you would tell me what was disturbing you. I had no idea... I just guessed that something was off. Arnav did not break his promise."
"But I would have," Arnav said quietly, "I had every intention to tell her, but she was quicker than me. I realize now though that I should never have made that promise to begin with."
Khushi smiled - another small ray of sunshine pierced through the clouds weighing upon her.
Akash nodded guiltily, his eyes still glued to the floor, unable to look up at Arnav, as he croaked, "It's my fault, Khushi. I forced Bhai into making that promise. When Bhai found out about... Inaayat, Anaita's mother, he was furious. He wanted me to man up and do what was right. But I... I was too scared that Payal would leave. I had a severe panic attack when Bhai insisted that he would not let her grow up in an orphanage, that he would bring her home as his daughter. I had this - almost irrational fear - that somehow, Payal would find out... that you would tell her, since you are her sister. In the state I was in at the time, I left Bhai with no other choice but to promise he would not tell anyone. And like a coward, I watched everyday, as everyone turned away from him and treated him as though he was the one who had sinned. And everyday, my guilt grew, and my fear grew, and I became more and more brazen in my attempts to shield myself away from the truth. It killed me to see how Bhai was being treated, but I ... I didn't do anything. I know that Bhai has always tried to set an example for me to follow, rather than tell me what to do. I know that he was hoping that I would eventually do the right thing, but I did not find the courage... not until now. Being able to confess to you, Khushi, triggered something in me. I have realized that the only thing that can free me from the nightmares within me, from my fear and my guilt, is the truth, and I have decided to take responsibility for my mistakes. Enough is enough. I will wait for our baby to be born, and for Payal's health to improve, and then, as soon as it is safe to do so, I will tell her the truth. I will not ask you for forgiveness because I don't deserve it, but I only have one last favour to ask from you... Please take care of... my daughter until then."
A heavy silence followed, but in that silence, slowly, all the anger and resentment that had been kept, pent-up, for what seemed like a lifetime, began to melt away.
Arnav's eyes were unusually glossy as he sat down next to Akash on the bed, "Look, Khushi, my brother has grown up. I know it's hard, Akash, and it's going to get even harder once Payal finds out, but at least you will be able to live with yourself. The truth doesn't stay hidden for long."
"Especially not with a detective bhabhi like Khushi," Akash said, chuckling slightly, in an attempt to lighten up the atmosphere, even as his eyes clearly belied a sense of impending doom.
Khushi's lips curved slightly. Even as her heart sank at the fact that the path before them was thorny and uncertain, and even as her eyes teared up at the prospect of such tremendous pain being caused to Payal, there was a sense of relief too. It warmed her heart ever so slightly to see the growth in Akash, and to witness the bitter-sweet reunion between the two brothers. Yes, the night that lay ahead was long and dark and starless, but they would somehow live to see the dawn. And as for Payal, Khushi would never allow her to remain sad now, would she?
"Akash bitwa," a voice called out from afar, interrupting her thoughts.
It was Manorama Mami, who had come to call Akash for the godh bharai. The ceremony was almost over, and the guests were about to leave.
Arnav turned to Arnav, "Bhai, the ceremony is incomplete without your blessings. Please."
Things were falling into place, slowly, steadily.
...
Current Affairs
Shiv Shakti
Ye Hai Mohabbatein
10