MrsBenedict thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail Fascinator 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
#1
Hello people. This concept has been giving me sleepless nights and then I finally decided to write this up before it leaves me with zombie virus. I am not a writer hence please ignore the minor mistakes .Constructive criticism is always welcome!


"I will confess today "



She stood at the juncture of platform 5 , the very same platform which was the witness of her unattainable and unrequited predilection. The subject of her deep rumination was expected across her lair at sharp half past eight . The clock was stationed right before her undaunted eyes , for which is she was forever indebted lest she missed the impending arrival.



" must be running late"


Her valient adjuration flattered when it met the eyes of unfamiliar entities and failed to meet the desired destination. The hustle -bustle of the platform was immune to her disquietude. Indebtedness to the mighty clock turned into the pool of uncertainities and reservations. The whirlwind of emotions then started reasoning with the possibilities of the reason of delay. The infamous traffic was summoned to the court of late arrivals, unruly fights on the road were also not spared . While awaiting for the impatient judgement the advent of familiar face adjourned the decision to fools land.



"finally !"



She shook herself from the reverie and took determined steps to comply with her resolute undertaking. As soon as she neared her destination , she ceased and walked away from him.



"not today , maybe tomorrow "



AN - this was all from my end now readers over to you hate it? Like it? You have all the freedom.
Edited by MrsBenedict - 8 years ago

Created

Last reply

Replies

4

Views

2.5k

Users

3

Likes

14

Frequent Posters

Gayu_K thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 8 years ago
#2
Well this was interesting
Pls do continue
MrsBenedict thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail Fascinator 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
#3

Originally posted by: DevakshiCrazy

Well this was interesting
Pls do continue

Thanks! For your kind words
Zaya.hp thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
#4
I am super intrigued. What was all that about? Why did she walk away from him? Your writing style is very engaging. It invokes this curiosity, you know?
Also, I'd like to suggest something, if that is okay. The easiest way to get to people through writing is to make it simpler. Your vocabulary is amazing and is like a feast to the eyes. But there are quite a few words I do not understand in the first read. Can you please make the language simpler? That would help a lot of people understand. There are many people who aren't very good with vocabulary.

Hope I did not offend you. And I am super excited! Update really fast...
MrsBenedict thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail Fascinator 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: Zaya.hp

I am super intrigued. What was all that about? Why did she walk away from him? Your writing style is very engaging. It invokes this curiosity, you know?

Also, I'd like to suggest something, if that is okay. The easiest way to get to people through writing is to make it simpler. Your vocabulary is amazing and is like a feast to the eyes. But there are quite a few words I do not understand in the first read. Can you please make the language simpler? That would help a lot of people understand. There are many people who aren't very good with vocabulary.

Hope I did not offend you. And I am super excited! Update really fast...

Now that I have little restrictions on the number Of post
I m here to comment.
I want to thank you for warning me about jargon which I was totally unaware of!
I m not at all offended. 😛
Rather enlightened 😃
Edited by cumberben - 8 years ago

Related Topics

Top

Stay Connected with IndiaForums!

Be the first to know about the latest news, updates, and exclusive content.

Add to Home Screen!

Install this web app on your iPhone for the best experience. It's easy, just tap and then "Add to Home Screen".