Bitter Kisses (PriVeer FF) [Ch 14 Updated Pg 34] - Page 4

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dimaag thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#31
Hey Twerps!
I was eagerly awaiting for the next update and most probably this tashan between Om and Ranveer. But thanks for including Shivaay and Tej too 🥳. Each of the aspect like friendship between Anika and Priyanka,then a father's concern(I liked especially that part of his breakfast where Jhanvi was present with her restrictions and the divorce problem 😃),then the brother's confusion regarding this sudden rise in Tej's voice, Jhanvi's surprised look and lastly Prinku's nervousness about this whole scenario was greatly portrayed 👏.
Like Emerald, I also was rushing towards the ending when suddenly you pulled the brakes of your writing yaar. That I-really-dont-give-a-damn attitude of Ranveer's with the how-dare-you-did-so attitude of Om's and the the rest of the Oberoi clan present at the Police station is worthy to be enjoyed and then what would be the next step of action from 1 against 3 is absolutely going to be great to read 😉.
So Twerps update soon. Ok? 😃
Tahiti-1 thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#32

Originally posted by: twerping



Heyloo buddy!
Glad you liked the opening chapter. I am really excited about this story myself tbh but don't know if I'll do justice to the idea in my head.
I shall catch up on your SS as soon as I'm done updating.🤗




❤️ ❤️ ❤️
Tahiti-1 thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#33
This. Is. BEAUTIFUL.
I dunno how to say it or where to begin. This update was absolutely beautiful!
I could see it right in front of my eyes! Twerps! You should become a producer! 😊
twerping thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#34

Originally posted by: -Sarcy-

Res! :)

-EDITED-

Ah! So the entire update was filled with reactions and the build up to the showdown! I see that Rudr was missing throughout the update - was that intentional because you have a different role for him in mind?

The whole insight into Tej's thoughts was quite amusing, seeing how Jhanvi regulates his diet and the man's reactions and resentment towards the intereference. 😆

I liked the little details you added like Oberois having traditional values despite their modern appearances. And again, Priyanka's thoughts give us a little more insight into her character. The way she perceives Anika and her childhood memories of her mother tell you that she isn't exactly blind to her surroundings. Though her reaction to Tej's summons is quite interesting because it tells you that she prefers to run away from problems rather than facing them - stems from her timid nature, perhaps?

And now the vultures will be descending on Randhawa! 🤣 Can't wait to see how the grand showdown goes. Pretty sure that Randhawa can give as good as he gets! 😎

Funny how both Priyanka and Ranveer are yet unaware about how they've made headlines today. 😆 I'm waiting for the individual reactions of both these guys to see what they think of their overnight shoot to stardom. 😆

Do update soon, Twerps! ❤️


Thanks Sarce for this delightful comment. The fact that you noticed the small things give me so much encouragement! 🤗

Actually, this story, though about PriVeer, is also giving me an opportunity to present the Oberoi family in my way, shape their characters in a way that satisfies me.

Update coming up... missed the weekend timeline but it's ready finally. Hope you like it.

Btw I just read over the last chapter and it was full of typos and such errors. Tried to keep that to a minimum in this one but can't say if it is 100 % ok. So will apologise in advance for any such mistakes. I know it can make the experience of reading a little less pleasurable.
twerping thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#35

Originally posted by: bworm

I was stalking for this update.

Why did you stop...it was just getting interesting.
Loved Tejs entry though. ..
Prinku insight in her mom's world.

Great going...but please update next part soon. Don't make us wait sp much.


hehe! Glad you liked it. Initially I didn't have much of a role for Tej in this story, but increasingly he is taking up more and more space in my writing. 😃
I am trying to keep a once a week update sort of timeline. Hopefully I'll be able to maintain that. Anyway, update coming up. Hope you like it. 😳
twerping thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#36

Originally posted by: emerald39

An update! 🥳

-Res-

-Unres-

I legit pouted when the update ended. Moreee 😭

Once again, I loved the Prinku-Anika moment. The way she observed her best friend, and recalled her own mother with a similar expression years ago -- haunting and heartbreaking. I always see so much of Tej/Jhanvi in Shivaay/Anika, almost like a parallel. So glad you brought that out here!

Moving on to our favourite man 😎 Why did you end it thereee I wanna see ACP holding the fort against the three Oberoi men effortlessly! 😆 Honestly, though, I cannot wait for the next chapter. Here I was waiting for some sort of RanKara tashan, but you are about to give us Shivaay, Tej AND Omkara vs. Ranveer?? *grabs popcorn*

I hope your work load decreases soon, so you can give us more of this goodness 😃


Anu!!! 🤗 The next one is a little longer.
Glad you liked that parallel. As I mentioned in an earlier comment, I am trying to explore the other characters along with that of PriVeer in this story.
I don't know if the tashan will live up to your expectations, but for now, I am really looking forward to what you make of the scene that unfolds in the ACP's office! 😆

twerping thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#37

Originally posted by: emina

Oh man! This was so interesting. I can't wait for Rankara Tashan in the next chapter😃

Please update soon😊


Glad you found it so. 😳
Update coming up. Hope you like it!
twerping thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#38

Originally posted by: dimaag

Hey Twerps!
I was eagerly awaiting for the next update and most probably this tashan between Om and Ranveer. But thanks for including Shivaay and Tej too 🥳. Each of the aspect like friendship between Anika and Priyanka,then a father's concern(I liked especially that part of his breakfast where Jhanvi was present with her restrictions and the divorce problem 😃),then the brother's confusion regarding this sudden rise in Tej's voice, Jhanvi's surprised look and lastly Prinku's nervousness about this whole scenario was greatly portrayed 👏.
Like Emerald, I also was rushing towards the ending when suddenly you pulled the brakes of your writing yaar. That I-really-dont-give-a-damn attitude of Ranveer's with the how-dare-you-did-so attitude of Om's and the the rest of the Oberoi clan present at the Police station is worthy to be enjoyed and then what would be the next step of action from 1 against 3 is absolutely going to be great to read 😉.
So Twerps update soon. Ok? 😃


hehe!! Dimaag 🤗
Glad you are enjoying the little things... I intend to have fun with this story so there might be many such instances of dwelling on the other characters before I turn my focus completely on our couple.
Sorry for the pulling the brakes on you guys. 😆 Actually, I wanted to keep you in suspense about what is about to go down in the office now. Hope you like what I have got planned for you and hope it lives up to your expectation.

twerping thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#39

Originally posted by: Tahiti-1

This. Is. BEAUTIFUL.
I dunno how to say it or where to begin. This update was absolutely beautiful!
I could see it right in front of my eyes! Twerps! You should become a producer! 😊


hahaha!! Miss you, Tahiti! You haven't been coming to the forum lately. 🤗

twerping thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#40

CHAPTER 3


Randhawa stared in surprise at the visitors he had never expected to set foot here, at least not of their own volition. He barely heard the low whistle Unni gave before putting away his duster. The first to enter was a woman he had in fact been thinking of seeking out. He knew that in her he had a key to unlocking the Gayatri Tambe murder case. Behind her, stood another woman who never failed to create in him a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. For it was none other than Miss Anika followed by Priyanka Singh Oberoi who had just stepped into his office at 9 o'clock in the morning.

**********

Priyanka had felt better after spending those precious few moments with Anika before all hell broke loose. She had found a semblance of calm inside the maze, away from the usual drama going on in their house, away from her family members who were increasingly suffocating her with their delusional attitude towards the whole fiasco that Shivay Bhaiya had brought upon their heads with his bull-headed decision of going on with a marriage when his bride-to-be had decided to run away.

At first Anika had rounded on her as if she wanted to shout at her. Priyanka had found herself wanting to hear her friend shout, scream, swear at the Oberoi family and send them to hell and beyond with her curses. Anything was better than that spine-chilling silence and hollow stare.

However, Anika had done none of those things. She had sighed and dropped down on the iron bench next to Priyanka. Instead of saying anything, Priyanka had reached out and laid her arm across Anika's shoulder. And Anika had turned and resting her head on the girl's shoulder had sat in silence. Not weeping, not speaking.

They had sat there in silence and Priyanka, remembering a gesture of comfort she had often received from Daadi in her childhood, had stroked Anika on her back, her head, not saying a word. And suddenly, the armour had fallen off and Priyanka had continued to stroke her back as Anika wept. She didn't know how long they had stayed like that. Her flimsy dress had grown wet with the tears where Anika had rested her face. And then slowly those tears had stopped.

"You don't have to listen to them." Priyanka had found herself saying. "Don't listen to any of them."

Anika had raised her head and looked at her through reddened eyes, her cheeks still smeared with the salty drops.

"You can leave any time you want. You owe them nothing." Priyanka had said, her voice an odd mixture of anger and nervousness. "I know money can never compensate for what has been done to you by this family...my family." She had had to look away then. "But I have some money saved up in my account. With that you can start afresh."

Feeling Anika's eyes on her she had turned back and seen surprise replace the defeated hollowness.

"They'll never guess."

"Run away?" Finally her friend had spoken and it was a question that startled Priyanka. Wasn't it she who always ran away from her problems? And was she now trying to make Anika do the same? But what other choice did they have?

Anika had slipped her hand into Priyanka's then and giving it a squeeze had actually smiled. It was a shadow of her usual smile but it had appeared on her face. "Don't tell me to run away, Priyanka. If I start running, there will be no end to it." And something inside Priyanka's heart had twisted uncomfortably.

"Things will work out." Instead of Priyanka assuring her, Anika was now comforting her as if it was Priyanka who was in turmoil.

"Why do you think Tej uncle was shouting for you?" Anika had asked. And Priyanka had sat there, guilt rising as she regretted the fact that she had decided to run, yet again, instead of facing her problems.

"I don't really know." She had said, and Anika had looked at her,widening her eyes, and at the sight of that Priyanka had started laughing.

Both of them were smiling as they stepped out of the maze and ran straight into Shambhu, their good-for-nothing gardener who spent most of his days with his nose buried in some film magazine or the other. Such was the nature of his idleness that he was treated more as a part of the decor than a employee. Yet, he remained in employment since his mother had been much loved by Daadi.

Shambhu was standing near the lily pool, smoking.

"Shambhu," Priyanka hissed. "Put that away! Don't you know smoking isn't allowed in the house."

The fool shrugged at that and instead of chucking his bidi, pushed forward a folded newspaper towards her. "Bade sahab hasn't stopped shouting." he said, grinning insolently.

Priyanka pulled at the paper and what met her eyes made her nearly drop it in the lily pool. Anika saved it from the fall and ran her eyes across the page, taking in the grainy poisonous photos.

"Oh lord!" Priyanka felt herself beginning to choke up. "What shall I do now?"

"Go and talk to Tej uncle. Explain the situation--" Anika begun, trying to calm her down.

"It is all his plan! I know it!" Randhawa's face rose before Priyanka's eyes. Smirking, his eyes glowing with the fire of revenge. "He wants to ruin me!"

"Who? Who wants to ruin you!?" Anika had said.

At the sound of a chuckle, Priyanka broke out of the fugue of terrifying emotions and glared at Shambhu, standing there with his teeth bared, as if witnessing a comedy.

She began to run towards the house then. Anika followed behind, Priyanka realised by the sound of her panting behind her.

"What are you going to do?" Anika huffed out.

"I'm going to meet him!"

"Who?!" Anika nearly shouted.

They had reached the foyer by then. Priyanka ran towards the door with the intention of calling Mohan, her driver. Before she could do so, a figure ran out and she crashed into Om.

"Bhaiya, I have to go out!" Priyanka said as Omkara caught hold of her.

"Prinku, I don't think you should--" Om began.

"Bhaiya, I need to sort this out!"

Anika stood there for a moment, too confused to get a grasp on what was happening. But as she opened her lips to speak, Priyanka shouted out, "Mohan!"

Her driver came running out.

"Take out the car!"

"It's here, Madam."

Priyanka spotted her car parked a few steps away and saying nothing turned to run towards her car. This time, she was followed by Mohan, Anika and Omkara.

Mohan got into the driver's seat. As Priyanka got in, she saw Anika clamber in from the other end. However, when Om tried to come as well, Priyanka called out, "O Bhaiya, I need to talk to him on my own! You'll only make things worse."

*********

"She said what?!" Tej Singh Oberoi's head was throbbing. His anger had reached unscaled heights by now. He watched that useless son of his stand there, frowning at the ground as if the solution to the problem was written there.

"She said that and you allowed her to leave?! Just like that?!" he thundered at Omkara.

"Well, what would you have had me do instead?" Om responded, his voice shaking in anger. "Lock her up?"

"I can't believe you allowed my daughter to go off on her own!" Tej's voice rose drowning out Om.

"She wasn't alone, Mr. Oberoi! Anika went with her!"

Shivay had been silent till now, trying to find a way to calm the two men down so they could go about solving the mess at hand.

"Anika?!" he shouted out in surprise.

"Yes, Anika' Om glared at his brother.

"What right does Anika have to interfere in the matters of this family?!" Shivay demanded, his voice barely concealing the river of fury whipping through him.

"Do I have to remind you, Shivay, that before you forced her into being your lawfully wedded wife, she was our sister's friend!?" Om said, his voice suddenly an ocean of calm, which was never good news.

"That is my personal business, Om!" Shivay raised his voice. Om's words had found its mark.

"Well, it didn't remain your personal business the day you brought her into the family" Om abandoned all pretence of trying to be calm.

"Speaking of family and yet letting his sister leave like that!" Tej growled as he dialled the intercom to call his driver.

"Why are you all shouting early in the morning? Woke me up with all the howling" Rudra sauntered in, rubbing his eyes.

Three voices rose in unison, "Shut up,Rudra!"

*********

"To what do I owe this pleasure?" said Randhawa, his tight-lipped smile barely hiding his contempt. He chose to focus his attention on Anika. The last time he had encountered her, she had been full of righteous indignation. He guessed that since her lover's marriage, her fire might have died down a bit. Was she here to talk about the night of the murder?

"So are you celebrating the success of your plan?"

It was Priyanka Singh Oberoi who spoke.

Randhawa turned to the woman he had been trying to ignore. She was looking at the copy of Mumbai Times lying on his desk.

"Plan?" he asked, as his mind tried to come up with possible reasons for the arrival of these two women here.

"I never thought you'd stoop so low..." Priyanka said, her face reddening with anger even as her eyes teared up. "When you pulled me in that night, I'd thought.." she stopped, her voice shaking. Randhawa watched as she held on to the chair before her, fist tightening around the smooth wooden bar.

"What are you saying?" he said. This woman was not making sense and he didn't know how much longer he could hold on to this thin veneer of politeness, when each and every cell in his body was raging with the desire to throw her out of the room.

Snatching the paper from the desk, Priyanka threw open the sheets to reveal the series of photos. "Ruining my reputation! Was that all you could think up, ACP?!" Her words were drowned out as Randhawa stared at the photos. Who? How? Why?! His hand fisted the flimsy sheets and crumpling it, he threw it on the floor.

"What is the meaning of this?!" he stormed forward towards where the women stood.

Anika marvelled at how Priyanka didn't even flinch as the officer towered over her, his eyes blazing.

"Don't play dumb now!" Priyanka gritted out. "I know you got them to run this story."

Randhawa's eyes turned to slits. "You think I got this story out?" His voice was calm, too calm.

Anika said, "Will shouting and glaring at each other solve this?" No one was listening though, save Unni. Anika turned to the boy. He gave a shrug, his eyes gleaming as he took in the drama before him.

Randhawa suddenly turned to the boy and said, "Get some tea for the ladies."

Priyanka wanted to punch him. "We don't want tea!"

Randhawa continued as if she hadn't spoken. "Unni, get some coffee."

"We don't want coffee!" said Priyanka as Unni butted in by saying, "We don't have coffee."

"Unni, just go!" shouted Randhawa.

Unni scampered out of the room. If only he'd breathed a little softer! To miss out on such drama!

Priyanka's anger now spilled over. Pushing at Randhawa's chest, she shouted, "Bullying! That's all you can do!"

"Calm down, Miss Oberoi." bit out the ACP.

"Well, so your revenge is complete then!" Priyanka went on. "Was that all you could come up with?"

Randhawa held her by her wrist as he bit out, "I didn't do this!"

"Don't touch me! Ruining my reputation! What a way to take your revenge!" Priyanka struggled in his hold, her eyes now streaming with tears.

Destiny chose that very moment to have Tej Singh Oberoi storm into the Assistant Commissioner's office, followed at his heels by Shivay, Omkara and Rudra.


NEXT

Edited by twerping - 8 years ago


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