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CHAPTER 32
Note... all green part is of dairy
"Adab Jalal.. Its been a long time since we had spent some time together. You don't even visit my chamber during night. And you didn't even give me any gifts." She said with a cheesy grin. There she comes... gifts... ufff..
"I was busy Rukaiya" I replied flatly.
"Whatever.." She said and... God.. She started kissing me. What the hell does she think of herself. I pushed her back.. I wanted to shout on her but my voice betrayed me when I saw Jodha standing at the door with the arti thal.
She looked down & silently went from there.
I rushed towards her room & found her sitting in front of Kanha. I kneeled down beside her & turned her face towards me. Her eyes were closed.
"Jodha... Please look at me" I pleaded softly.
She opened her teary eyes. "Am.. sorry shehensha, I shouldn't have went there. Even the guards didn't stop me. I.. I.." She stammered. I took her in my hug.
"Jodha... I" I tried to explain but didn't had any words to do so. She must be thinking that I spent my whole night with Rukaiya. It felt so disgusting to confront my wife on the matter of my intimacy with my other begams.
I continued "Rukaiya came just a minute ago from your arrival. It was nothing like it appeared to be."
"You don't have to justify me shehensha. And.. Am just one of your many wives. I can't chain you to myself." She said meekly. I pushed her a little to bring her face to face.
"Jodha... I had spent yesterday night alone. No one.. I repeat.. no one was with me. Do you get it" I said firmly looking into her eyes.
She nodded. I continued "and dare you say that you are just one of them. You are different and.. special to me. I like being with you. Never leave me Jodha"
She hugged me tightly. "I will always be with you.. for you" she promised. I kissed her forehead.
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At night, I was sleeping cuddling my softie. I woke up due to some movements. I opened my eyes & saw Jodha was sweating badly & fear was clear on her face. I shook her "Jodha... Jodha..."
She opened her eyes & saw me with shocked eyes.
"What happened sweetheart" I asked softly.
She hugged me tightly & started sobbing. I hugged her back & caressed her hairs. After few minutes she relaxed & stopped crying. I didn't break the hug. She needed some more time.
"Did you see some bad dream" I asked. She nodded.
"What did you see.. Wanna share" I said.
"You won't leave me na shehensha" she asked
"Never sweety" I kissed her forehead & caressed her back. After sometime, she calmed down. She broke the hug and I was shocked to see her teary eyes.
I asked "what happened Jodha.. Why are you so scared.. And why are you crying" silence was all that I got in response. She silently laid down on her place & closed her eyes. Even after asking so many times she didn't budge. I had to leave bugging her coz she needed rest and... Time.. She needed time to recover. I just hope that the dream.. Whatever she saw.. Don't disturb her very much.
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It had been two days after that incident, I don't knew why but she remained aloof.. She became quite. I went in her room in the morning. She had just finished the prayer. She greeted me & gave me prasad & arti. She took my blessings & I filled her mang with sindoor. A lone tear excaped her eye. Saying that I was shocked will be an understatement. I held her shoulders firmly.
"Look at me Jodha" I said. But she didn't budge.
"I asked you to look at me Begam Jodha." I ordered. Finally she looked into my eyes.
"What's the matter" I asked.
"Nothing shehensha" she fibbed.
"Jodha.. If you had really ever thought me as your husband... Then answer me honestly" I said in a low tone.
"You love Rukaiya begam?" She said meekly. I pulled her towards me. "I don't love anyone.. Not especially her" I said firmly. She hugged me & cried. "You won't force me to leave you na shehensha"
"Never Jodha.. I will never let you go. I can't live without you. Never even think of leaving me" I shuddered in fear. I think she must have dreamed that I distanced her from myself. My sweet little idiot.
Gradually she returned into her own self. I really love to be with her.
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Today I brought her here.. In this lake side. She was so happy to see this place.
We were sitting under the tree. I rested my head on her lap. She was caressing my hairs. I took my time to study her features.. My gaze stopped at her red juicy lips. I got up & kissed her lips.. Nibbling on it, I pulled her head closer. She was trying to kiss me back. I chuckled understanding that it was her first kiss & she was trying to learn how to kiss.
Even the kiss felt so divine. I smiled thinking how it would feel to consummate our marriage.
She slowly started kissing me the way I was. I wanted to teach her step by step because she was too innocent to take it in a go. I thought that will be enough for her now. I broke the kiss & looked at her with desire filled eyes.
My body was burning in passion. I was hard to the extent that it pained.
She blushed seeing me. Her lips were quivering. She got up & ran from there. I followed her trying to catch her. This soon became a catch me game. Haha.
Finally after a good chase I caught hold of her. I pulled her closer & again stared at her. Ufff she is so cute. Never had anyone made shehensha e hind run behind him or her like this.
Jalal's eyes widened. The same dream.. kiss, passion, garden, tree, running around...
He got emersed in thoughts that how come he saw Jodha in his dreams & that too at the same place where he found that dairy. And how come his hands worked automatically in that pond side on the ground & found the dairy. Is it related to him in any way. Does rebirth really happens? Is it possible that he had lived that life years ago? He then remembered Jodha calling him as her husband. Although he didn't believed in rebirth but today it seemed that nature was trying to build his faith in these things. Fate is way more powerful than him.
But why did he found it at this particular time when he is trying to be away from Jodha??
He opened the book & read further..
Time flies so fast when I am with her. Innocence & cuteness personified.. That is MY Jodha.
Jodha tried to make some friends but probably my begams were jealous of her.. Of her beauty so they didn't make friends with her.
I had not given so much time to any other begam. Generally I used to spend some time with them but the greedy behaviour of theirs irritated me & I never went back to them. They just wanted titles & positions so that they become more powerful in harem. But Jodha never asked for any such thing.. She just wanted me.. Me as a person & not as a shehensha. So I liked to be with her. Probably this made them more jealous that I spend so much time with her.
I sometimes think that maybe I did injustice to Jodha by marrying her. I segregated her from her people.. Her loved ones.
But then my selfish heart doesn't allow me to let go of her. I feel very good with her. I spend all my free time with her. I had not been with any other begam since my marriage with her.
But.. Bhagwandas.. Jodha's brother came from Amer. She has to go to Amer for Pag phera ritual... Tomorrow morning
I don't want her to go. Why am I feeling like they didn't ask for Jodha.. But for my life. I feel so suffocated.
After I was done with diwan e khass and all.. It was almost night & I went to Jodha. I usually enter her chamber without any announcement. I saw her sitting in front Kanha's statue. I felt like I saw a bit sadness in her eyes.
"Jodha..." I called
She looked at me & came running towards me. I was confused by her behaviour. She hugged me as tightly as she could & deepened her face in my chest. I hugged her back.
"What happened Jodha??" I was damn worried. She didn't utter a word.
"Did anyone tried to hurt you Jodha?? Please say something." I said caressing her hair.
"I.. I don't want to go" she mumbled
"Where" I asked
"Amer" I stood dazed with her answer. I totally forgot about that seeing her sad.
She continued "I can't live without you.. I love you shehensha"
A smile came on my lips discerning the reason behind her resistance towards her Amer. She loves me. Can anything else make me more happy.
"Don't you want to meet your family" I asked
"You are my family shehensha" she lifted her head & looked into my eyes with lots of love.
I caressed her cheeks "which stupid told you that I am sending you for ever??? Even if you want I won't leave you"
She smiled "you will come to bring me na"
"Ofcourse.. I won't let you free so easily.. And definitely not before we become grandparents" I teased
She chuckled & hugged me again.
In the morning she hugged me & cried before her caravan set out for Amer. My heart tore seeing her like that.
I felt so lonely without her. Sleep remained far away from me at nights. I missed her cuddling, her antics, her smile, her morning bhajan, those cute moments.
I set out for Amer after 10 days. I was so desperate to see her. It felt that it was the longest journey of my life.
When I reached Amer Jodha was waiting for me at the gate with arti plate in her hand. Her whole family was there but my eyes were struck on my beauty queen.
After welcome & all I was escorted to Jodha's room for resting. Finally everyone left US alone.
I hugged her tightly & she was no less desperate. I kissed her forehead & she looked at me lovingly.
"I missed you so much" she said
"I missed you even more" I replied
After sometime.. We were on bed..
Ehhh don't activate your dirty mind Mr dairy..
No such thing was happening
I just hugged her & she kept her head on my chest.
"So.. Asked your mom what hardwork we have to do to make a baby" I teased.
But it had different affect than I had expected. She became sad.
"I don't have a mother... When i was 5... She went to Kanha" a tear escaped her eyes.
Cricket
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