I am usually a silent reader but the topic saying Nirmala is wrong in not trying to meet her son forced me to post a reply.
I am sure most of you have no idea of what an abusive relation means. I can tell you all from my personal experience and from my friends experience what it means and why we decide to give up on a relation. This will be a long post so please bear with me.
I personally being in an abusive relation tried my best for years to make things work. The situation at my home was the same that as long as the husband's income is not great, wife's income is amazing. The minute husband's income gets good, wife's income is from not acceptable means. Questions are raised on the wife's character. Similar to nirmala and ramnath. I tried for years to make peace only for my child but beyond a point it is impossible to compromise on your own identity and self respect. Keeping the best interest for my child without any emotional support from anyone in this world, I decided to end the abusive relation. Now most of you would wonder, if the parents are separated how is it good for the child. A calm home environment is needed for a good upbringing of the child. Imagine what will v the child learn of the child continued to stay in a abusive relation. If a son, he will learn it is acceptable to be abusive towards your wife and if Daughter she will learn that since she is a girl, she has to live in any kind of relationship. Both which are wrong. Now I am out of that torture and I lead a very normal life with my kid. The father, read my husband, has not bothered to check on his child for years and when contacted him, he doesn't feel the need to have any contact with the child.
I will give you another instance of my friend who also had been through hell. It took her years to come out of such a relation but she could not get the custody of her kids, thanks to her husband's manipulation. She has not seen her kids for 8 years. Not that she doesn't want to but the situation is not conducive enough for her to break the barrier and meet her child. She misses her child every minute.
So in such cases, I fully understand what Nirmala must have been through and how she kept herself away from her son.
It is people who have been through these situations can relate to Nirmala. It is not easy to be in one such relation nor is it easy to get off it.
M sorry for such a long post but wanted to share my views about Nirmala not meeting or contacting her son. I don't mean to offend anyone, sincere apologies if this hurt someone
Edited by anuarao - 9 years ago