Guilt.
That one emotion which has the potential to completely shake your world to either make it or break it. And in Arnav Singh Raizada's case, it was being broken beyond limits as he found himself hurting an innocent soul, who happened to be the love of his life, whom he had loved beyond anything. And then did he realize, he never loved her.
Because if he had, his hands would have surely shivered before doing something as bad as what he did 6 years back and his heart would have stopped beating before accusing Khushi of something as heinous as he did. He realized that he had loved her but somewhere that lead to intense obsession which destroyed both their lives, actually made him destroy their lives.
Khushi deserved all the love of the world and thousands of apologies from him, and he deserved every kind of punishment, thought Arnav as he supported his head by a pillar supporting the gazebo in the lawn.
" I will pay for every sin I have committed, Khushi. I will prove to you that I love you and will continue to do so." vowed Arnav Singh Raizada while he gazed at the photo of Khushi in his phone.
The drop of tear escaped his eye and fell on Khushi's eye in the phone, while on the other hand, tears flowed out of Khushi's eyes in the same way as Arnav's but they were for a different type of guilt. Guilt that her heart had probably chosen the wrong person but now there was no way she can back off, as she had loved him and would continue to love him no matter what.
NK's heart broke to see her like that. She had went against her family to stay with Arnav as they were not in a position to believe the person who could forcibly marry his best friend and now that same person had accused her of so many things which none but Khushi could bear. He consoled Khushi by placing his hand on her hand and signing with his eyes to not feel more bad about it.
"Why did he do this to me NK? I had rejected him when he proposed, I was stupid I agree to say that no one can resist my charm but for that one thing I was forcibly married, I was insulted and humiliated. Agar Mujhe Arnav Itna Pyaar Karta Hai Tho Itni Nafrat Hi Kyun Dikhata? 6 Saal Main Agar Usne Kisi Aur Se Na Pyaar Karke Mujhse Pyaar Kiya Tho Mujhe Aise Treat Kyun Karta tha Jaise Main Koi Anjaan Dushman Hoon?" NK encircled his arm around her shoulders while she sobbed about her pain on his shoulders.
" Arnav Tumse Pyaar Tho Zaroor Karta Hai Khushi Lekin Uska Ego, Uska Tumhare Liye Obsession Iss Pyaar Se Badkar Ho Gaya Tha. Proposing might have been a big thing for him, he might have been very hurt by it and he might have loved you a lot, but the way he treated you was wrong. And don't cry Khushi. Aren't you the one who consoles everyone by saying whatever happens is for the best? If the destiny chose you to meet again after 6 years, then the same destiny can unite you both if that is what is best. But for now, Arnav needs to realize his mistakes or else you will be caught up in whirlwind of pain forever, which I certainly don't want. Give him sometime, and I am sure your love for each other will surely win. What he has for your is maddening love but love nevertheless and that will bring him back to you. Just relax now. You have already stressed a lot." NK's words of consolation had brought her raging mind to a much peaceful condition. She had tried to make this relationship work and now since Arnav knows about her feelings for him, it was his turn to make it work. And if he does it genuinely and tries to erase her pain, she would surely give in.
" Thank you so much, NK. For being there for me always." Nk smiled warmly at her while answering,
" Kaise Nahi Karta? You are my friend, Khushi. I am sure you would have done this to me if I needed. Now sleep. We will go to your house tomorrow as it is already late. Good night and sweet dreams, baby."
Khushi smiled through her tears while her mind compared helplessly; two guys whom she rejected. One of them was the reason of her tears now and one of them was the one wiping her tears away. Which was love and what was love, was a question which she still sought answer for in their case. But she thanked her destiny for giving someone as loving and as understanding as NK to her, who cared more about her than anything else.
Prem Nagar Ke O Shehzaade
Dil Hua Bebas Phir Tere Aage
Kyun Dil Tere Peecha Jaaye
Khud Uthe Kyun Dard Sataye
Mere Sawaalon Ka Jawaab Do...Do..Na
She waited before the sleep shut her eyes for the last time that night but she knew it was not possible especially when her heart was running behind someone, someone who gave her immense pain and someone who redefined love for her.How her heart could be so uncontrollable when it came to someone who destroyed her still managed to wonder and soon she was lying in the peaceful lap of sleep, away from every pain and every distress and close to the memories which she held the closest to her heart; the memories of her and her Arnav.
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Hues of Love Designs,
Khushi heard three curt and professional knocks on her door when she asked the person knocking her door to come in.
" Yes?" asked Khushi while still looking at the designs waiting for approval as a lot of work was pending since she had not come to office since a few days and if she had come, she was not at all productive.
" Khushi.."
That one voice which managed to steal her heart time and again, made her heartbeats stop for a second and then pace with a speed which was ignorant of. But she pulled herself together knowing that she couldn't afford to lose control in front of this man.
" Mr.Raizada? I wonder what made you come here? Hasn't a mail been sent stating that we are calling off the contract?" Her formal tone had unceremoniously broke Arnav from inside, seeing what he had done of the happy-go-lucky person.
" You will break the contract, but what about our relationship, Khushi?" Arnav's deep breaking voice reflected the broken pieces of his heart which had fallen into deep and dark pit of redemption and pain.
" What about our relationship, Mr.Raizada? You have a better relationship with your alcohol bottles and cigarettes than you have with me. It shouldn't be that difficult to break this relationship which you clearly don't desire." Khushi gulped down the pain which seemed to choke her and suppressed that love which was threatening to envelope her ever since she laid her eyes on Arnav.
" Guess why I had begun drinking, Khushi? I had started to drink for you. I was obsessed of you and to clear one obsession we have to embrace some other obsession and I embraced this. Remember I had told you that I would die happily for you. The only way I could reach you was by taking these drinks, by losing myself into my subconscious mind where I would find you. I had turned self-destructive in your love, Khushi. I love you so damn much that I was ready to lose everything to get my Khushi back and when you finally came back, the pain came back and tormented me till I gave in to its demands of hurting you. I am extremely sorry, Khushi. I am ready to accept whatever punishment you would give me." Arnav looked at her with determination springing from his love for her but there was something in his eyes which she was seeing for the first time in the last 6 years.
" Will giving you a punishment reduce my pain or heal my scars, Mr.Raizada?" Khushi's question had boggled Arnav's brains. He had no answers but he knew he had to answer to her, for himself,
" At least it will give me pain, which will lighten me and I will be scarred if not as much as you. I deserve every taunt, every punishment for mistreating you, Khushi. It is something which is beyond a sorry or a punishment. When I said I wanted to get colored in your colors, I meant even the colors of pain, Khushi. Will you not allow me to share your pain and understand it by bearing it? Please grant me the privilege of embracing pain given by you."
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HAYYE! Did I tell you I loved the last dialogue of this?
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