You know why I took this line today. Reason is how many times a word misunderstood has destroyed relations.
How many times we intend something, but when we speak something else come out. How many times we take the meaning of something that is not told, that is not thought about.
Today Guha did the same mistake. Ram told him they cannot enter villages and cannot have cooked food. He never told they cannot have food. But Guha thought that as an insult to him and started telling Ram is like that he has heard, but in reality no one want to be with them as they are poor and also of low caste.
Ram immediately clariifes his stand. But why do such things happen. Reason first one is your expectation. You have heard so much about someone and when that person comes in front of you, you expect him to behave in a way you have heard about him. So for Guha Ram should visit his house, have food there. He does not understand Ram in front of him is duty bound. He is no longer Prince Ram, but Ram going to forest. So not understanding the other parties situation. The classic example of this is mixing reel with real. We see many people doing the aarti of reel Ram, reel Krishna, not understanding once out of the show they are humans like us. Also people hate the actors doing villian roles. It's a role. Hate the character, but not the actor. When I was in some other forum in IF I have seen actor bashing. Very mean words are used for the actor. Really he or she is a professional, they are doing their work just like we do our work. We can bash the character, but why bash the individual. Who are you to call an individual flower pot actor, useless actor. That doesnt even account to constructive criticism. And then are you the one who decides it is a useless role. So this not meeting expectations because what we have heard is not seen. But what you see you dont understand, because you keep your thoughts in what you have heard and try to judge the person. I gave the most easiest example, but it happens in many situations in life.
Second issue is your self worthiness. Do you consider yourself not worthy of love, affection and accolades. Then of course in every action of others you will see this unworthiness only. First raise yourself in front of your eyes. First respect yourself, then you will gain respect in the eyes of others. I will always say Karna was the classic case of this proof of self worthiness. Why did he want to prove himself a better warrier than Arjun. What was there in Arjun. Was it because everyone was loving and approving the prince. Then why didnt he try to understand why everyone loved Arjun. What was so special about him. Karna never understood Arjun looked life with glass is half full attitude, but irrespective of calibre for Karna the glass was always half empty.
So to maintain good relations, first love and respect yourself. Then if something is not meeting your expectations before trying to pass judgement, before raising ruckus try to understand the situation. When you cannot see what in front of you, dont hear words that are not told
Edited by shruthiravi - 9 years ago