Part 26:
The gang and swayam and nanu were leaving. Rey payal and nanu were talking while coming out of the house so the gang dragged kriya to the corner.
"Are you really all right kriya? If you want, you can come with me right now you know?" Swayam says to kriya. He is worried about her.
"Exactly dude how can you forgive Rey so easily?" Vishaka adds.
"Exactly. It's not like we didn't want you to forgive Rey but the way he behaved today we thought it will take sometime for you to forgive him" Vicky says confused.
Kriya smiles sadly at them and says "when somebody close to your heart hurts you the most and immediately asks sorry realizing their mistake then we need to forgive them because when they realize their mistake, it's them who are suffering more than you. Guilt eats to the extent that they starts creating distance from every one. In such situation it's our responsibility to stop dragging the issue by forgiving them."
"So you forgot what all he said about you so easily?" Vicky asks seriously.
"No. It will take some time for me to forget those words of rey but he has realized that how much his words have hurt me. So that's fine for me" says kriya.
Before anyone would say further, they see Rey approaching them so they drop the matter.
Once everyone left kriya went up to her room giving some time to mother and son duo. She herself needed some time alone.
Kriya after changing into night dress and out off all make up, stood at the open window from where the cooling air was coming. She thought about all the moments with Rey since her mom told her about the proposal. Kriya for the first time realizes that she is depending on someone for the first time in life. So much that his little anger filled words are hurting so much for the first time. For kriya it's not new that her friends or her mom or even swayam many times had hurt her in anger. And she always knew that it was their anger speaking so she never took them to heart. Kriya always try to correct things in her closed ones life so in that process many times it happened that she forcefully stopped them doing some stupid mistakes or interfered when they didn't want her to so it always ended up with some hurtful words towards kriya from them in anger. But she didn't mind because she knew once their anger vanishes they will realize their mistake.
But with Rey it's different. It's affecting her more which is disturbing her a lot at the moment. When kriya recalled rey's words, tears starts to flow silently from her eyes. She let them flow. She was so deeply involved in her own thoughts and confusions, she didn't observe Rey entering her room and seeing her state and then leaving silently.
It was only after couple of minutes, kriya shockingly becomes alert when she heard something crashing sound. She rushes out of her room wiping her tears and finds more throwing things sounds coming from the next closed door, from rey's room. Kriya runs to his door and before she knocks on the door, more breaking things sounds comes followed by loud frustrated growl.
Kriya stands there stunned by his painful sound. This time composing fast she knocks on the door. And observes that inside every thing becomes silent in reaction to her knock. For few long moments no crushing of things or rey's voice or any movement inside the room. Kriya knocks again.
"Go away" ...those two painful words were enough for kriya to understand rey's state at the moment.
Kriya without wasting time, ignoring his words knocks again and says "open the door Rey.."
"No"
"Please"
"No. Go please"
" sorry I won't..(after a long pause) I can't"
Kriya doesn't get any reply but after few seconds door opening sound comes. It was just unlocking sound of door. Kriya opens the door and enters to see the disaster in the room. Every possible/available glass things were crashed and the room floor is covered with glass pieces everywhere. Kriya went out of room and enters again with broom and starts cleaning the floor but soon a hand stops her by holding her wrist. It is then kriya looks at rey's eyes which have become red with anger and self loath. Kriya wipes her tears fast with other hand and try to release her hand from rey's grip.
"You don't have to clean this mess" Rey whispers. His eyes too have tears now.
"I know but I don't want others to witness this. Let me do this" kriya whispers back.
Rey leaves her hand and clutches his hair in fist cursing frustratingly. When kriya try to start cleaning again Rey holds her wrist again and says "I will do it later. That's fine."
Kriya throws the broom and holds his hand drags him to his bed then makes him sit by pushing his shoulder.
"Just sit here. Give me couple of minutes. Let me clean it. Don't argue please. I really don't want anyone to know this. Please" kriya says slowly making sure Rey took her each words and understood.
"Every one knows" Rey says looking at the opposite wall instead of kriya.
Kriya was little taken back by this revelation. That means Rey has reacted like this before also. No. Scratch that, it means he reacts like this in hard situations.
Rey opens his mouth to say further but kriya cuts him off saying "but no need for others to know this now onwards. Let me take care of this mess..please"
Kriya notices drops of blood on few glass pieces. Her body freezes for a moment but wiping her tears she first locks the door from inside and then she starts cleaning the floor. While cleaning she find many glass pieces with blood, ignoring them she rushes and cleans the floor quickly. Then she brings first aid kit from bathroom and sits next to Rey, who was sitting on bed looking down, elbows on his thighs.
Kriya puts her hand on shoulder, first Rey doesn't looks at her but after few seconds turning his head opposite side wipes his eyes and then turns to kriya giving a sad smile.
Kriya without saying anything takes his hand and starts cleaning with cotton.
"When dad died, all I heard was mom saying she was also supposed to go with dad to Kolkata and they had planned that after meeting, mom and dad will visit my mom's parents house and stay there for couple of days. And mom said she couldn't go with dad because... Because.. I ...I...had fever.."
Kriya was shocked to hear this. She didn't know about this because no one discussed the death after a month of that incident. Of course they cried missing their dads but no talking about the incident. It was unspoken rule.
Rey continued "mom and dad never took me to mom's house in Kolkata. Because my grandpa, who was the only person in mom's life passed away a year after mom and dad's wedding. So whenever dad used to have meetings in Kolkata, mom went along to visit grandpa's house there. And they used to leave me in nanu's house with swayam. So when dad died mom said if she had gone with dad and as planned, they stayed back, then dad would have not left us."
Kriya hugs Rey tightly. She couldn't control the emotions. Rey is going through so much. It hurts her. Rey continued "mom couldn't go with dad because of me..I am...responsible for...her...loss...because of me...she is been suffering.. I..I...really don't know kriya... I don't know what can I do to make her happy again in life..I don't know kriya..I am really a worst son any mom could have, who is the reason for his dad's death"
Kriya pulls herself away from hug and this time she cups Rey's face with her hands and says "don't allow all these negativity to enter your head. You are not responsible for anything. They are destined to go from our life. So they left. No one is responsible for that. And you are the best son any mom could have. Ask swayam, today only I said him, how much you love your mom for whom you are ready to take any insults from her friends. She is very lucky to have you as son. "
Rey cuts her words, removing kriya's hands, stands up and says frustrated "no kriya. I am doing all this just not to make her more miserable in life. Whatever I do kriya, I can't bring that happiness back again in her life. It's impossible. And that frustrates me every time I look at her. My mom's playfulness, carefree personality has gone with dad. I can't bring that back. That's why I don't want to hurt her in any way."
That explains rey's hurtful words towards kriya in the party. Kriya makes him sit again and starts cleaning his hands silently. Once it's done, kriya says "I will correct everything in this family Rey but you have to trust me for that."
"Don't.. Just don't hurt mom kriya..I will go out of control whenever somebody hurts her. I have already caused so much of pain in her life unknowingly. Don't want others to say or do anything hurtful in her life. I am just protecting her. I know I have hurt you today. It was not your mistake, I over reacted. But i can't help it."
"I don't care how you react against my actions but I will do the damage control very soon."
"Don't make me hurt you again."
" doesn't matter. This family's happiness is my priority now "
" you want me to feel guilty for hurting you as well? "
"I don't know but at the end, you and payal mom will be happy and that's all matters to me"
Rey turns to kriya who is sitting on his bed. Goes and sits next to her. Her determination is clearly evident in her words. Which definitely gave him little hope that his mom can be happy again like smriti mom but for that to happen all the buried incidents have to come out. Rey's guilt has to come in front of his mom which will hurt both for sure.. So he turns to kriya and holds her hands in his and says "please kriya. I request you let it be. I will not be able to take it, mom will be hurt (because as he grown up he has understood that his mom doesn't hates him or blames him for his dads death. But he is still unable to accept it and thinks he is the reason for his dad's death)"
Kriya giving him slight sad smile says "I will be there with you. I will be there for payal mom"
Rey stands up again. Facing his back to kriya says "you are not understanding kriya. Let it go..please"
Kriya stands up and hugs Rey from behind and says "I will be there for you Rey..trust me.. Even if you hate me, doesn't matter, i will be there for you, till you and payal mom comes out of this mess".
Rey sighs. He understood now that he can't stop kriya. Hell he doesn't know what's cooking in her mind. But one thing she is repeating which Rey has noticed. At least he wants to clear that. So he turns around by making kriya to release him from hug. Facing kriya, he asks directly
"What do you mean by 'even if I hate you'? You are saying it repeatedly today."
Kriya doesn't respond instead just looks down. When Rey said hurtful things about her in party, she took it as Rey hates her now even though she knew he was just angry, doesn't hates her. But even the thought of rey hating her making kriya emotional. It's hurting her a lot but she herself doesn't know why is she thinking like that.
Rey holds kriya's chin gently and makes her look at him and says "do you think I can start hating you so easily? Do you really think I can hate you?"
Kriya so wanted to say ' no' but instead she says " I don't know " looking into his eyes.
Rey cups her face and rubs his thumbs on her cheeks gently. After few moments says " I can't kriya. I just can't hate you. You have given me so much in past few days. Taught me so much. Giving different direction to my life. How can I hate you?"
Before kriya could stop herself, words comes out next "then why did you say 'who am I'?"
Rey smiles at this, continuing caressing her cheeks with his thumbs says " was angry. Sorry. Huh. Please kriya don't hurt mom. I don't want to say or do something which will hurt you again.. Let it go"
Kriya got it that this whole thing will not stop any soon if she continues talking to Rey. It's waste to tell him to trust her. So kriya says "good night Rey. Have some rest now". With that she steps back from his holds and turns around to leave but Rey turns her back by her shoulder and hugs her tightly. Putting his chin on kriya's shoulder says "I trust you kriya. Really. But the thing is I don't trust myself when I become angry. My actions and words will be very harsh. I don't want to hurt you again. I don't want to see mom crying again. These are years of piled up emotions for mom. Can't change them so easily. Can't start controlling my actions in this matter so easily. I am sorry. I have hurt you today. I didn't mean to." Saying this Rey hugs kriya again breathing on her neck. When kriya starts stroking his back slowly with her fingers, he nuzzles below her ear with his nose. Kriya stops stroking his back and gulps at his action. After few seconds Rey feels kriya's stiff posture and realizes what was he doing. Slowly he pulls away from hug and looks at kriya's face. Kriya looks at him blinking few times then looks away. But Rey observes a slight blush on her cheek which makes him smile.
After a few seconds when kriya starts to leave again, Rey holds her wrist but kriya doesn't turn back,
"I think now you know I don't hate you".
Kriya smiles and says " good night Rey." And without looking back leaves smiling Rey.
Done..hope many of you got the answers to your questions now. If not please feel free to express it. I won't mind.
Cricket
Bindi
Udne Ki Aasha
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
