FF: Unloved (Complete) - Page 41

Three years earlier...

Parvati was on her way back home from the orphanage. The sun was setting, and she was in a rush to get home before dark. Mami-sa would go mad with worry if she didn't reach home on time. She held on to the handle of her bag tightly. Within it, she had some papers that mami-sa had asked her to bring back. Parvati looked in her bag for the fourth time since she had left the orphanage to make sure that she had grabbed the right documents. Her attention was diverted from the road ahead of her for only a minute, but it was in that minute that she collided with someone.

Instinctively, she grabbed onto whomever she had collided with. Her hands clutched the soft fabric of the stranger. The stranger had held her as well in an attempt to balance themselves. Once she was sure that she was balanced, Parvati turned her attention to the stranger supporting her. Her eyes widened in shock as she found a man, who looked a little older than her, holding her by her shoulders. He was staring back at her with his dark green eyes, which were as wide as hers. Parvati came back to her senses and released her grip on his white shirt. He let go of her too, but his gaze remained fixed on her.

She adjusted her pink dupatta and then looked at him, "I'm sorry. I wasn't looking where I was going."

"It's okay," he said with a smile. "Neither was I. It looks like we were both at fault this time."

Parvati smiled, "Anyways, sorry once again."

The man nodded. The two of them continued walking their original paths, opposite of one another. Little did Parvati know, that this was the beginning of the storm that was about to enter her life.

~

She was at the orphanage when she had spotted him again. Parvati was sitting on the grass, helping the children with their arts and crafts. She didn't know what made her look at the entrance of the orphanage, but when she did she saw him. At first, she didn't recognize him as he was casually strolling by, his attention on the phone in his hand. However she felt that she had seen him somewhere. She watched as he looked up and saw her. He stopped and stared. That was when Parvati remembered; he was the one she had accidentally run into a week ago.

She smiled at him before turning her attention back to the children. However, Parvati could sense that he was still there, watching her. She didn't dare look up to confirm her suspicions, but she could just feel those green eyes searing into the side of her face. It made her squirm uncomfortably. When she finally had the courage to look up, he was no longer there. Parvati wondered who that man was, and how it was strange that she had seen him again. It must've just been a coincidence.

If only she knew that there was no such thing as coincidences.

~

"Paro! Can you please come out here?" Mami-sa's voice resounded through the house.

Parvati, who was in her room, sprinted happily through the hall and into the living room where her mami-sa was waiting for her. Her red dupatta flowed like ribbon in the wind behind her as she glided into the living room.

"Yes, mami-sa wh-."

She stopped in her tracks. The smile that had adorned her face faded. She squinted her eyes before widening them to the size of saucers. There, sitting on the couch in the living room of mami-sa's house, was the green-eyed stranger. He stood up upon seeing her and gave her his best smile. She observed him, taking in his formal appearance. He was wearing a white button-down shirt and black pants, both of which looked freshly pressed and starched. His jet-black hair, which had been carelessly combed-over the last times she had seen him, was now overly-gelled, shining as much as his eyes were. As he looked at her from head-to-toe, Parvati shot mami-sa a puzzled look, asking her with her eyes what was going on. In response, mami-sa smiled and gave a gentle, yet assuring nod.

"Paro, this is Varun," mami-sa stated as she gestured to the man. "Varun Kumar."

Parvati folded her hands and greeted him. He did the same.

"He came here to meet you."

"Meet me?" Parvati repeated confusedly.

"Paro, he's brought a marriage proposal...for you."

Her eyes widened in shock as she looked back and forth between mami-sa and Varun. She gaped, unsure of what to say. A marriage proposal? An arranged marriage. This was something that she hadn't thought about yet. She was, after all, only nineteen. Not that she had never thought of marriage. Ever since she was a little girl, she had dreamt about a man coming to sweep her off her feet and marry her. Just like every other little girl, Parvati had wanted a husband, a home, and children. And now, a marriage proposal is here for her, and she felt hesitant. She had only seen this man twice before today, and had barely spoken to him. Yet here he was, ready and waiting for an answer to his proposal.

How did he even know where she lived? Had he been following her? Or had he asked around about her? Either way, something seemed amiss. But this soon became irrelevant as Varun smiled at Parvati nervously. She couldn't help but return the smile because she felt that he seemed like a decent guy. She glanced at mami-sa from the corner of her eye, and saw the eagerness with which mami-sa looked at her. She was hopeful, but didn't want to jump to any conclusions without discussing it with Parvati first. So the least Parvati could do was talk to him before taking any decision.

"I'll give you two a few minutes alone," Mami-sa said. She went into the kitchen.

Varun was the first to make the move. As soon as mami-sa was out of sight, he walked over to Parvati and stopped right in front of her. Parvati, nervously, fiddled the edge of her dupatta. She looked down at her feet, suddenly feeling shy.

"Hi," he said softly.

"Hi," she replied without looking up.

"I'm sorry if I'm being bold by bringing a marriage proposal so soon, but I just couldn't stop myself."

Parvati looked at him, "What do you mean?"

"Remember when we first met, you know when we accidentally bumped into each other? Well, after that day, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I didn't know what to say or do, but I had this urge to find you and see you again. I don't know why, but I knew I wouldn't be able to rest until I saw you again, and I did. That day at the orphanage, I couldn't stop staring at you. I had this urge to see you again and again. I didn't want to stop. And I knew...I just knew, I had to have you. So, I asked around. I even came to the orphanage asking about you. And now I'm here."

Each word made Parvati turn a deeper shade of red. She couldn't believe this man was so taken by her. She couldn't stop blushing with embarrassment. The honesty with which he spoke to her touched her, and she found herself drowning in this desire that he was expressing for her.

Varun continued, "I know we barely know each other, but I still want to marry you. People used to have arranged marriages all the time, and their relationships turned out fine. I think we could do the same. I know it's not something many people do nowadays, but I'm willing to if you are. All I know is that, now that I've found you, I'm not going to let you go so easily. Take all the time you need to decide, but I just wanted to explain my actions."

Parvati didn't know how to respond to Varun's bold statement. She hadn't said anything to him, not even when mami-sa came back and began talking to Varun. Nor did she speak when she served him tea, fingers gently brushing in the process. Only when he was getting ready to leave did she speak. It wasn't much, but it was the one thing that mattered to him. Standing on the porch of mami-sa's home, Parvati gave Varun the answer he was searching for.

"Yes, I will marry you."

~

The wedding was small. There was nothing too fancy about it since Parvati didn't have much family, and apparently neither did Varun. He had a younger brother, Shantanu, and a mother, both of whom he no longer lived with. However, he seemed very close them.

Parvati was in a state of euphoria as she made her way to the mandap. She was getting married. It was happening. Her gaze met Varun's, who looked dashing in his cream-colored sherwani. Dressed in a beautiful red and gold lengha, she was most definitely a stunning bride. Guests praised her beauty, comparing her to Goddess Parvati, herself. Men felt jealous seeing this beautiful woman about to be claimed as a wife. Woman envied the glow that emanated from the bride as she made her way to her groom, completely forgetting everything else around her.

They exchanged garlands. They walked around the fire, taking the seven pheres. He filled her maang with the red powder known as sindoor. A beautiful mangalsuthra adorned her neck, signifying her status as a newly wedded woman. With the completion of these rituals, Parvati had become Varun's wife. As she looked over at the man who was now her husband, Parvati couldn't help but feel happy. Everything in her life was falling into place. She was married, and was now going to live happily ever after.

If only she knew that this was the only moment of happiness she would ever experience in her marriage...

~

Parvati sat on the decorated bed in Varun's bedroom, her hands wrapped around her knees, which she had brought up to her chest. She would be lying if she said she wasn't nervous. Her heart was beating so erratically that she was taking deep breaths just to control herself. This night was suppose to be magical. It would be the night where her husband would make her his in all senses. Well, Varun was going to claim his right on her, but not in the way she expected.

She waited for him. Minutes turned into hours. It was almost midnight when Varun had finally come into the room. She heard the door click. She watched as he walked in with his head down, not once looking at her. He shut the door with his foot and then stumbled forward. Concerned, Parvati got up from the bed and went towards him. He looked up at her, his eyes intoxicatedly glazed. As she got closer to him, the smell of alcohol reached her nose. He had been drinking. This surprised her. She had never expected him to be a man who drank; he didn't seem like the type. Varun continued to stumble, tripping over his feet and losing his balance and falling into her. She placed her hands on his chest to steady them both.

"Are you okay?" she asked, worriedly.

"I-I am fine," he slurred his words.

"Have you been drinking?"

"Yeah. So?"

"Why?"

"Arre, I was celebrating with my friends. They wanted to celebrate my wedding."

As she tried to balance a swaying Varun, Parvati repeated herself, "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I said I'm fine!" he stated rather loudly. "Didn't you hear me the first time?"

"I think you should just lay down."

She tried to guide him to the bed so he could lie down and rest. Obviously, he was not in the right state of mind, but he just didn't see that. When Parvati tried to pull him, Varun yanked his hand back. She looked back at him and found him angrily glaring at her. She was taken aback by the look on his face. The rage that seemed to be building up within him was slowly seeping through. An overwhelming sense of fear began filling her as she took a step back.

Varun suddenly barked at her, "I said I am fine! Who are you to tell me what to do?!"

"I-I am your wife," she said hesitantly.

"Just because you're my wife does not give you the right to control my life!"

"I wasn't-."

"Shut up!"

Parvati closed her mouth.

"You will not try to control me! You are my wife and you will do as I say! Is that understood?"

She didn't respond.

"Is that understood?!" he shouted.

She nodded.

"Good."

Varun steadied himself and slowly took a step towards her. Instinctively, Parvati took a step back. Seeing this side of Varun scared her. She didn't like it, at all. This was the sweet guy that had come bearing a marriage proposal for her. This was someone else; someone Parvati didn't want to be anywhere near. As he moved closer to her, the only thought in her mind was to keep her distance. Varun extended his hand to touch her and she retracted away from him quickly, almost as if she were disgusted by his touch. He tried again to touch her, and she retreated once again. This only fueled his rage.

"Why are you moving away Parvati?" he asked.

She said nothing. How could she tell her own husband that she wanted to be away from him?

"Come here."

Parvati didn't move.

"I said come here!" Varun leapt forward and grabbed her by her arms.

She let out a yelp as he tightened his grip. Tears flooded her eyes as she struggled to get out of his grip. But he was too strong. Parvati didn't give up though. She continued to try and push him away. She tried to hit him and wriggle out of his manic hold. But her attempts only sent Varun over the edge. In one swift move, he lifted her and pinned her down on the bed beneath him. He hovered over her, holding her wrists above her head while pinning her legs down with his. At this point, Parvati was crying as she continuously fought to escape. This was wrong. This was so wrong. She didn't want this. She had to get away. Parvati squirmed underneath him like a fish out of water, and the more she tried to move the harder Varun held her down.

"Stop struggling!" he shouted.

She looked at him, "Please just let me go."

"This is our suhagraat Parvati. We can't let it remain incomplete."

"No. Let me go."

"I will never let you go. I told you that from the beginning. You belong to me now."

She stopped struggling for a moment, "You say it like I'm your property."

"You are my property! What do you think I married you for? I wanted you, so I married you. I own you now! You belong to me! So I can do to you whatever I please!"

"You...you don't love me?"

"Love you? Are you serious? Love was never a part of this! I only married you for this," he traced his fingers down her body, making her flinch in disgust. "Love had nothing to do with this!"

Parvati felt her heart break as the reality of her marriage sank in. Varun didn't marry her because he loved her, he only wanted her physically. He wanted to claim her body, not her heart. She wanted all of him, but he only wanted half of her. What was happening to her life? She didn't know, but this realization couldn't go unignored. She knew this marriage was just a sham, and she had to get away.

"You have to let me go," she said.

"Didn't you hear what I said?!" he yelled. "I am never letting you go!"

"I have to get away. I-."

"Get away? And go where? You're an orphan. Nobody wants you!"

Parvati stilled beneath him. Her eyes widened at his words.

Varun continued, "Nobody wants you! Your parents gave you up. You were never adopted. I am the only one who ever gave you the time of day! Hell, your mami-sa was practically throwing you out the door during the bidaai'. She was ready to get rid of you, the burden that you were on her. No one will ever want you! You know why? Because you aren't worth anyone's time! You have no value! The only thing you have going for you is your looks."

"Mami-sa...s-she loves m-me. She-."

"She doesn't love you. No one loves you. If they did then they would want you. But nobody wants you. Therefore, nobody loves you. You're unwanted! Unloved! Unessential! I am the only person who has and will ever consider wasting my time on someone like you! So try to walk away from me! You're going to find out that I'm right!"

Parvati's tears didn't cease. Each word, each syllable he uttered was like a knife to her chest. Every sentence pricked her like rose thorns. She didn't want to believe what he was saying, but so much of it made sense. She was an orphan, and she was never adopted. Was it because she was never wanted? Did she not have any value? She didn't doubt mami-sa's love. Never. But was there anyone else who loved her...who would ever love her? Was Varun right? He was the only one to ever give her the time of day, but that was only because he desired her physically. Was physical beauty all she had to offer? She was unwanted. Unloved. Unessential. She could die tomorrow, and no one would care. They wouldn't even know she was no longer in this world.

"You know I'm right," he breathed against her neck. "So stop struggling."

Parvati moved away from him once again, and this time Varun lost it. Before she could even process what was about to happen, he sat her up and slapped her across the face...hard. He had had enough of her fighting. This was the last straw. When she looked at him again, he hit her once more. Harder. The sound of skin making contact with skin resounded in the bedroom. He shoved her back down on the bed and pinned her against him. Even though she fought with all her might, Parvati was no match for Varun. That night, he not only verbally and physically abused his wife, but forced himself on her. And all Parvati could do was beg for him to stop and pray for it to all be over.

~

That night, Parvati had seen the true colors of her husband. He was an abusive drunk. Varun never apologized for his actions because he didn't regret what he did. He simply told her the next day, while she was tending to the bruises and marks on her wrists and face, that he could do whatever he wanted. It was his right as her husband. He repeated his cruel words to her again the next night, when he forcefully took her once again, leaving more wounds on her delicate skin. She fought in the beginning. She tried to get away. But as he attacked her with his words, his assurances that no one wanted her and that she was a burden on others, Parvati stopped fighting.

The verbal and physical abuse continued in the following months of their relationship. With each passing day, Parvati began to fully believe that she was unwanted and unloved. Varun's taunts scarred her memories and branded her mind. She lost the motivation to leave her marriage, fully believing that no one, other than her husband, would want her and see her as something other than a burden. She even kept the truth about her marriage from mami-sa, fearing that she would become a burden to her once more if she did so. So, Parvati suffered in silence, bearing all the pain that Varun gave her. Her heart repeated one phrase everyday: This wasn't how it was suppose to be.

Then one night, she received the news that changed her world once again. Varun, her husband of five months, had died in a drunk driving incident. In the blink of an eye, Parvati had become a widow. The final rites were done quick and fast, as her mother-in-law didn't want anyone to know about her son's drinking being the cause of his death. Her brother-in-law performed the final rites. She was not allowed anywhere near Varun's body. In fact, Varun's family didn't want her anywhere near them. They blamed her for Varun's death, stating that he was perfectly fine until she entered his life. She was the reason he was drinking beyond his limits. They, indirectly, labeled her as Varun's murderer. If only they knew that she was, in fact, his victim.

She didn't even try to deny their accusations. Varun's words had destroyed her to a point where she no longer believed herself worthy of anything or anyone. Parvati receded within herself. She stopped talking to people, she rarely went out, and she shut herself away from the outside world. She remained in Varun's home until the day her mother-in-law personally came to kick her out. As a last resort, Parvati went to the last person she could turn to: Mami-sa.

Mami-sa took her in without any question. She had adored Parvati like a daughter, and to see her in such a state had tore at her motherly heart. Parvati hadn't said a word since she returned to mami-sa. She kept to herself, and helped out silently. Mami-sa tried to get her talk, but for weeks there was no progress. It was as if the old Parvati, who was always happy and kept a smile on her face, had died. This lost, distant woman was just a shadow of an existence of Paro. Mami-sa assumed it was because of the loss of her husband.

But then she stumbled upon the horrible reality that Parvati had kept secret. She had walked into Parvati's room and found her on her knees in front of the mirror. After weeks of silence, Parvati had finally broken down. She covered her face with her hands and sobbed uncontrollably, causing mami-sa to rush to her side and to find out what was wrong. It was then, to her horror, that she had caught a glimpse of the bruises on Parvati's neck and arms, which she had cleverly kept hidden beneath the long-sleeve salwar kameezes. In her defeated state, Parvati revealed the sham of her marriage, from the suhagraat to the daily abuse. And mami-sa? She could only hold Parvati close and shed tears while repeatedly asking Bholenath what Paro had ever done to deserve this.

**********

...I really don't have anything to say. Finally, the truth is revealed. Let me know what you think by leaving your comments and feedback below.

Next update: What will Rudra's response be after hearing the truth about Paro?

Thanks for reading!