FF: Unloved (Complete) - Page 17

During Sengupta's class, silence dominated once again between Rudra and Parvati. The only words that had been spoken were before class, and that was when Rudra asked Parvati if they were still going to study after class, to which she had simply nodded. They didn't speak to each other after that. Rudra was just happy that he had gotten an answer rather than be ignored. He admitted to himself that the distance between them seriously bothered him. He didn't like it one bit, but he didn't know what he could do except wait for her to tell them where they stood. Knowing her, she would be straightforward and honest with her answer. Rudra just wished it wouldn't take so long. This wait and tension was making him restless.

Even though she hadn't spoken, Parvati's mind was screaming as it raced with thoughts. Her Mami-sa's words from earlier that morning replayed like a broken record. She remembered how Rudra had been nothing but nice to her, and in return she had simply shut him out. Parvati wondered if she had hurt him by pushing him away. But he was still practically a stranger to her, why should he feel bad if she decided not to let him in. Because he is trying, she thought. Parvati knew that this was the truth. No one had ever tried to understand. They merely judged her. But Rudra was different. He surprised her by simply accepting the truth about her parents. He actually wanted to know the truth.

Whether she wanted to admit it or not, Parvati knew that the tension between them was not settling well with her. It was mainly because of their friendship. He had been the first person in a very long time who wanted to be friends with her, and now that he had given that title to their relationship, Parvati felt that she was failing on her end. As much as she didn't want to say it, Parvati seemed to be attached to their friendship, much more than she believed she was. She glanced over at Rudra in the middle of Sengupta's lecture and saw him taking notes. Parvati knew she would never be able to tell him everything about her past, but...would it be possible to tell him some things?

~

That afternoon, Parvati sat alone in the library. She was studying for her other classes while waiting for Rudra, who was late. Usually, he would be there before her, sitting around and waiting for her, but this time was different. If they hadn't still agreed to meet up, Parvati most likely would have left. She glanced up at the library entry door every once in awhile before looking up at the wall on the clock just above it. She turned back to her book, and rested her cheek on her hand. Five minutes had passed...then ten minutes...then fifteen...

Rudra came running into the library. He ignored the curious glances he was receiving and weaved his way through the tables to the one where Parvati was. He crashed down in the seat next to her and tried to catch his breath. She shot a surprised look at him as he slammed his notebook down, catching her off guard. Rudra took deep breaths for a few minutes before he finally caught his breath. It was then he looked over at Parvati to see her looking at him confused and concerned.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he answered. "I'm really sorry for being late."

"It's okay."

"Really?"

"Yes."

He sighed, "You know we're friends, right?"

"Umm yes?"

"Is that an answer or a question?"

"An answer?"

He blinked.

"An answer."

"Then because we're friends, it's okay for you to be mad at me. I was, after all, twenty minutes late."

"I know it's okay, but I'm not mad."

"Are you sure?"

"Do you want me to be mad at you?"

Rudra chuckled, "No no. I just wanted to make sure you're not mad."

"I'm not."

"Okay."

Rudra watched as Parvati began taking her History book out of her bag. She opened it to the section where they had last left off. He, too, pulled his book out and opened it. Rudra had been wondering whether or not to talk to her about what had happened Saturday night. She seemed to be able to have a normal conversation with him, and it made him think that everything was back to normal between them. However, he knew that it wasn't the truth. Rudra wasn't going to feel normal again until the unspoken tension around the two of them had melted away, and for that to happen he would have to talk to her about that night. Parvati looked at him to find him looking at her.

In a serious tone, he asked, "Are you okay, Paro?"

Parvati looked at him surprised, "I'm fine. Why?"

"I just wanted to be sure...especially after the other night."

Parvati's eye flickered with a hint of pain before she quickly masked it, but Rudra had seen.

He leaned closer to make their conversation more private and said in a softer voice, "I am sorry, Paro. I really am. I had no intention of hurting or offending you. Believe me, it was the last thing I wanted to do."

"You didn't offend me," she said softly.

"If that's true, then why were you crying?"

Parvati looked down at her hands on the table. She didn't want to explain to him why she had reacted that way, and wasn't going to. But Mami-sa's words rang in her head once more. At least he's trying. She looked back up at Rudra, who was watching her in anticipation.

In a voice that revealed her vulnerability, she said, "Your words just brought back a lot of memories of my past...memories that I would like to keep buried. To be honest, apart from Mami-sa, no one has ever treated me as nicely as you have."

Rudra was stunned, "...No one?"

She shook her head. Her eyes brimmed with tears, but never shed. He saw her holding back the tears with such ease. It made him realize that she had much experience with it, and this made his heart ache. It made him want to know what had happened that had left her so scarred, but it wasn't worth making her relive those memories and push her away. Rudra was about to say something, when Parvati spoke again.

"It's not that I don't want to tell you why I am this way...it's just something I'd rather not talk about."

"I get it. It is just something you would rather not share with anyone."

"Yes."

"May I ask one thing though? Is it really that painful?"

"...More than you will ever know, Rudra."

He nodded understandingly, "I'm not going to ask you to talk about it. Your decision to not talk about this is your choice, but if you ever feel that you need to talk to someone about it, I am here."

"Thank you."

"So...uh...is everything okay now? I mean, between us."

Parvati nodded, "Yes. We should start studying."

Rudra also nodded in agreement. The two of them began studying, just as they had done for the last week. Rudra was now much happier that the air had cleared between them, and he could sense that she felt less stressed about the situation as well. He was glad that everything was back to normal because he would have hated to lose a friend like Parvati.

After a few hours of studying, the two of them decided to call it a day and head out a little earlier than usual. Rudra's mind hadn't been in the books after Parvati had explained that her past was painful. He pondered all the possibilities of what could have happened, each one darker than the last. She had noticed him lost and told him that they would study at home, since he still seemed to be distracted. Rudra had no choice but to agree. However, he didn't want to go home yet. He enjoyed Paro's company and the fact that they were leaving early didn't quite settle right with him. They exited the library together and stood on the steps, facing each other.

"I promise I'll study tonight to make up for what I wasn't paying attention to today," Rudra vowed.

"It's okay," she replied. "It happens sometimes. People get distracted. Just study tonight and you'll do fine on the exam tomorrow."

"Okay," he rubbed the back of his neck. "So...are you free right now?"

She shook her head in denial, "I'm going to go to the orphanage."

"Orphanage?" He repeated curiously as he dropped his head from his neck.

"Mami-sa runs an orphanage. It's the one I grew up in."

Rudra nodded as he recalled what Parvati had said about her parents during the firework show.

"I help out over there, and visit from time to time. The children are expecting me later today, but since we ended early I can go now. They must be waiting for me."

"Oh..."

"Yeah. Well, bye."

Parvati turned around and began heading down the steps. Once she reached the bottom, she stopped abruptly. She recalled everything Rudra had just said to her in the library. At least he's trying. Give him a chance. Parvati closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she prepared herself for the shocking thing she was about to do.

Rudra was about to walk down the steps when he saw her stop. He didn't move, but watched to see what she was up to. She hadn't turned around. He wondered what had happened. Did she forget something? Was he suppose to say something? Suddenly, she turned halfway and their eyes met. She didn't look upset or sad for once. Instead, the hopeful glimmer had returned, making Rudra's heart involuntarily beat faster. Just by that glimmer, he knew that she wanted to ask him something.

"I don't know if you would want to, or if you have plans right now," she said. "But if you don't have any, and if you want to, you can come with me...to the orphanage."

Rudra's heart skipped a beat. To say he was shocked would be an understatement. He was completely surprised but what she had just asked. He knew that this wasn't a little deal to Paro, it was huge. Not only was this orphanage important to her, but it was a part of her past. By asking him to come, she was giving him a small glimpse into her life. It dawned on Rudra that she was giving him a chance to know her, and he would be nuts if he let this opportunity slip right passed him!

"Sure, I'd love to," he replied eagerly with a grin.

She gave a soft smile, "Okay. Follow me."

"Wait! Why don't we take my motorcycle?"

"Your motorcycle?"

"Yeah. You can sit on the back. You won't fall off."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

Parvati agreed to ride on Rudra's motorcycle. A few students, who were roaming aimlessly, noticed the two of them walking together. Some watched curiously, while others whispered to their friends, wondering where the hot guy' was going with the behenji'. The two of them paid no attention to it though. When they reached the parked vehicle, he got on first, followed by her. He handed her his notebook, and she put it in her bag. Then she slung it tightly around her waist to make sure it wouldn't fall off somewhere down the road. Even though he had promised that she wouldn't fall off, Parvati was still nervous. It was her first time on a motorcycle.

Rudra glanced back at her over his shoulder, "Just hold on to my shoulders if you're afr-."

Before he knew it, she was gripping onto both of his shoulder for dear life. His gray sweater was crumpled into her two small fists. It seemed that she had been waiting for his permission to do so. Seeing this, Rudra made a mental note to drive extra carefully for her sake and peace of mind. He turned back to face forward and started his bike. Before she knew it, they had exited the college campus and were on the road to the orphanage.

**********

Awww, she's giving him a chance!!! Let me know what you thought about this update by leaving your lovely comments and feedback below!

Next update: Rudra at the orphanage. Definitely a sight to see!

Thanks for reading!