NEVER LET YOU GO.:
PART-24
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23rd June 2002.:
"Vartika..." i called out her name standing at the door of the kitchen, when she was making coffee for her in laws.
"vardhaan? up so early.!.. Go! fresh up mai coffee le kar athi hu" she said not turning back.
"di.." i called her again..
"haan baba! Kya hua?" she turned back..and her jaw fell open instantly, she was gaping at me with teary eyed!
"vardhaan...tum...ye... sab...sab...theek hai na?" she stammered at my appearance, of course there was a point, i woke up early that day, fixed my hair, shove my beard and then i took bath and dressed up with utter dignity.!
"di! I am going back to FITE" i said, my face gleaming with happiness... She was blank. i knew she don't want me to go but she did that for my sake, for the sake of my happiness.! How ever she accepted it with utmost bliss, i quickly bade good bye to vartika, my jiju and to in-laws! Once on the road, i headed towards the bus station as my next destination was iit Mumbai...!!
24th June 2002
MUMBAI.:
it's noon by the time i reached the college, IIT MUMBAI. my home for past 2 years.!! I walked to my hostel, and rushed to my room, my room mate had already vacated and it welcomed me with all the mess... The sculptured scrap art roses lying on the floor scattered for the past 2 years, still hadn't lost their charm of course they were lifeless as i was...but still..! They might not be fragrant but special enough!! The very first sight of those brought the images of that night on terrace to mind, i tried hard to push them aside but my dairies, the papers on which i wrote how much i missed her, our pictures, the machine models lying on the floor were gawking at me! Poking hard on my wounded heart! Making me feel responsible for her death! Killing me from inside. Nothing wrong. I deserve it, i should have controlled my ire, that night on terrace, that night on road.. It's my fault...that she was no more today!
I sank to the floor hugging those roses and her pictures to my heart, Tears instantly flowed down my eyes! I cried, cried till my head hurt, i wailed curling on the floor, "come back niharika! Come back, please" i screamed but in vain my screams dissolved in the sheer silence later. I don't know how long i spent like that, crying and pleading god to turn the clock back to bring the night on terrace again,so that i could correct my self. I knew it's impossible. But still i hoped!
The clock struck 5 pm when i heard a knock on my door. I checked the time and rushed to the door, and opened it in haste, only to see my warden standing in front of me!
"vardhaan, you got a call from delhi" he said
i knew niha might have called me to tell me how much she loved me and how hard she was dying to be with me..
"did she called me??" i widened my eyes. my warden was perplexed and was busily passing surprised stares to me.
"she must be waiting" i said to myself of course loud enough and began to climb the steps to ground floor in haste, i ran to the reception like a
maniac, and grabbed the phone receiver
"hello niharika! Niharika.. I am sorry, am sorry baby! I love you, i love you.." I began to scream in the receiver like nuts but all i could hear was nothing.
"niharika, niharika, say something, please talk to me" i iterated crying, but nothing came in response, instead I heard soft sobs from the other side, i fell silent when i heard a low quivering voice saying...
"vartika"
i then realized. It wasn't her! She hadn't called me. It's vartika, who had called me. All of sudden i remembered, that she was no more.!! My eyes welled up. I didn't feel like talking to vartika, instead I felt like running back to vartika and crying in her lap.. i just placed the receiver back and wiped those silent tears i shed just... I felt suffocated. I turned back to leave instead i saw my hostel warden standing beside me in utter shock and belief
"vardhaan??" he narrowed his eyes
I wiped of my tears and spoke "sir, am vacating the hostel," i said walking back to my room. he said nothing... He was too stunned to see tears in my eyes. I hastily walked back to my room and i heard warden asking me something from behind about her
"how is niharika, did you meet her? Is everything fine??" his words caught my ears and my heart ached!
"what should i say sir? That i killed her??" i cried asking my self, all the while walking back to my room. Once in the room i began to stuff all my belongings in my bag,, tears refused to stop flowing and things seemed so blurry because of my teary eyes! Suddenly my leg began to pain like hell, but nothing seemed obstructive, my heart was longing to go back to FITE, to rest in it's lap with the memories of her! I packed all my dairies, our pictures, and few other stuffs and reached the reception, warden was waiting there for me, i completed all the formalities of the college and the hostel there by collecting my certificates in silence, fighting back my tears and exited the college... With that, my bonding with the college and Mumbai ended there...!
25th June 2002.;
FITE, ROURKEE
it's almost midnight that i reached rourkee, and i had no idea weather i could find any space in FITE again... i desperately entered in to the college and my lips stretched automatically when i stood at the notice board... i smiled sadly as i remembered that it was the same day and the same spot that i stood years back checking my result and wondering about the rank no 1. I was dejected, suddenly, my leg began to pain like hell and still i was perplexed about entering in and so i sat on the steps and in no time slipped into kip with my bag in my arms..Hours passed and i woke up with someone tapping on my shoulder calling out my name,
"sir.!" i mumbled on seeing prof.rag standing with his arms crossed across his chest, in front of my eyes..
"what the hell is going on here?" he waved his hands in air.. I tried to stand up but my leg! It swelled... But somehow i stood up and tried to speak!
"sir! I want to stay here! Forever" i mumbled
"what the hell! This is college, not an inn" he thundered
"i know but..." my voice trailed off as tears occupied my eyes.. Words struck in my throat.
"umm!" he twitched his lips "come" he said, i said nothing, i just followed him as he escorted me to the staff quarters... He began to fill some formalities as i stood there, lost. Couple of seconds later he gave me the keys... I took them, completely baffled
"sir...ye sab..."
"i am recruiting you as asst.prof vardhan"he cut my words short. I don't know what to say! I fell short of words! He knew all about me and niha but i was not sure that he knew about her death!
"see you..! Couple of days later... All the best vardhaan.!" he patted my Shoulder and he left for the college.
SAME EVENING.:
it was around 5.30 pm that i called vartika just to inform her about my where abouts and things at FITE. She sounded so happy for me! I said nothing i smiled as i hung up, that at least i had one person who thinks about me! I came out of the staff quarters and entered the college! It welcomed me with echos of niharika's voice and resonance of her laughter at every corner, her fragrance in its air! I strolled around the canteen, class, lab, library every corner of the college was reminding me of her! I felt safe and happy because i was with her! and she's with me! Isn't she? Well, she is!! finally i reached the terrace where we used to spend most of the time.!!
It was 6 pm and the sun was all about to set..! I stood there, at the railing and checking on the entrance every now and then expecting her to come to me to accompany me at any time and hold my hand, filling the gaps in between my fingers, making me complete! I was waiting! That wait, might be never ending! In no time i witnessed the birds chirping and flying back to their nests,,, it was getting dark and cold with every passing second, even the moon had shown up.
"why niharika! Why me?? Why did you do this to me! Is this the pay back you want to me to give? Why niha? why? Such a big punishment for my small mistake... Niharika tell me..!" my heart screamed and it's screams came out in form of the tear drops through my eyes! I knew she never would come..
"This is not fair niharika" i wailed.. I knew she was listening from some where! Some where near around me! Suddenly i heard heavy foot steps trudging towards me... But before i could turn back to check on the owner of the steps, i felt a hard blow on the back of my head... and my vision blurred.. With in seconds i landed on the floor... I could still hear the foot steps around me!
"open your eyes! Vardhaan.. Don't you dare close them.. You have to see me! You have to see you death! Right in front of your eyes! c'mon! Stand up!! Look up!" i heard a familiar voice screaming at me... I felt my eyes heavy.! But still i tried hard to open my eyes and i did!
"Kabir..." my voice trailed off as i saw him looming out of darkness with a hockey stick in his hand..!
"don't be surprised! Vardhaan, utto..!" he brought the stick near my chin making me look up. I tried hard to stand up taking the help of the raling by my side...
"is it paining vardhan???" he said while i was struggling to stand straight..."look..! Look here! Look at me! You bas***d.. You deserve this" he hit me on my shoulders., on my face, i tried to defend my self but never tried to hit him back because i felt i deserved that pain and i let him... He hit me om my arms, on the already broken one! I was screaming in pain. "It pained the same when you snatched what that belongs to me away! Bloody son of ****h" he hit on my legs and i collapsed on the floor again
"you snatched the love of my life and you killed her! You burglar! See what i Have in store for you! Stand up.. You.! Face me!!" he grabbed my arm, making me to stand, but i was toppeling, the pain was increasing with every passing second and i was unable to stand, i felt blood forming streaks on my nape,, and my arms were bleeding, just that the stitches were torn apart, the bruises all over my face..not even allowing me to open my eyes!
He was screaming, scowling and hitting me like a maniac.. But i was happy that god had planned something painful for me as he did for her...
"hey look! Don't close your eyes!! Look look vardhaan! Look here" he gnashed hitting me on my legs, i landed on the floor due to the impact "this is for the what you've done! This is for your so called love! This is for the pain you imposed on her" he was shouting and hitting me! His voice was dreamy, and my vision was blurring..! I began to lose my senses as he beat me black and blue, enraged...
My eyes slowly began to close no matter how hard i tried to open them. "sorry di, and thank You kabir" i mumbled,
"yeah! You should be" he hit me again, in ribs, with his boot leg! I rolled in pain as blood began to ooze out of my mouth. I was writhing in pain,Still a warm smile of satisfaction crept to my lips and they curved instantly,
"am coming to you niharika!!" i smiled and closed my eyes, forever, as i felt hard blows on my head, once, twice, thrice and then i lost the count and i passed out.!
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Edited by chocolate4 - 11 years ago
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
