Chapter 10 B
Khushi looked out the window over her parent's kitchen sink; the clouds were getting heavier and darker. She didn't have much time if she was going to go over to the school yard to take care of her yearly contribution.
"Ma, I need to head out before the weather gets any worse", said Khushi as she wiped her hands on the dish towel hanging near the sink.
Garima turned from closing the refrigerator as she loaded the leftovers from the Sunday lunch.
"Khushi, it is going to pour any second Beta, why don't you do it tomorrow, one day late won't make a difference, plus it will take you at least an hour to do it and you know the rain's not going to hold off that long".
Khushi smiled at her mother and looked out at the sky one more time, a soft smile playing on her lips, "Ma it's been so long that I am here personally to take care of this, please don't ask me to wait, I promise if it starts raining I will complete the rest of it tomorrow".
Garima looked at the determination in her daughter's eyes and felt her own fill with moisture; she knew how important this was for Khushi and didn't want to argue with her.
"Acha theek hai, make sure you bundle up and have your umbrella, do you need any help? In fact why don't you take the boys with you ---"
"Nahi Ma, the nursery has already taken care of the heavy lifting; I just need to plant the shrubs, plus I would like to do this on my own".
Khushi walked over to her mother and gave her a tight hug, holding her within her arms for a few seconds longer than necessary, "Thanks for lunch Ma", she whispered in her ear before turning and walking out of the kitchen.
Garima watched her daughter head out of her home and slowly closed her eyes in a silent prayer, "Please Devi Maiya watch over her".
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Khushi ground her hands into the soft, cold soil as she mixed in earth's dirt with that of the shrub she was planting, raising her head to look sideways she made sure everything was aligned.
"Ok last one Khushi, and you made it before the rain hits", she thought to herself just as the wind around her picked up.
Looking up at the sky she felt the rain around her before soft drops hit the surface around her.
"Ms. Gupta, we've packed everything up, is there anything else we can do for you?", said a voice from behind her.
Khushi stood as she brushed off the dirt from her gardening gloves and gave the young man before her a smile, "Thank you so much for your help Mike, I really appreciate you coming out in this weather".
"Not a problem Ms. Gupta, we love coming out here every year, it was a pleasure having you with us today".
Khushi felt a few more rain drops land on her head and nose and quickly finished gathering her belongings.
"You guys can go ahead Mike, I'm just going to be a minute".
Mike hesitated as he watched the sky darken within seconds, "Are you sure Ms. Gupta, it's about to come down hard? We can wait for you and escort you to your car".
Khushi laughed softly as the wind loosed some of her hair from her ponytail, "You know I've been waiting for it to rain all day, and it still hasn't come down, at this point I'm almost waiting for it. Go ahead Mike, I won't stay out here too long and I have my umbrella".
Mike smiled down at her and turned back to the two men waiting for him in the nursery's large delivery van.
Khushi turned back to look at the shrubs of winter jasmine that had been planted along the trellis of the playground of the school.
Every year on this date Khushi always donated some landscaping project to the Oakbrook School. It was something she had started when she herself had been a 5th grader here, the year she had lost her best friend Anjali.
Today was the day she had first met Anjali, right here in this playground. It was something she had never been able to forget, and over time her mother had reassured her that it was not something she needed to forget, but a sweet memory that she could always cherish.
At first it had started off as a small flowering plant that she had asked her mother to help her plant, after clearing it with the school board, Khushi had been allowed to bring something new to the gardens of the school every year.
During her time in New York, Khushi had hired a landscaping company to come in and work on the projects, even after her mother had told her that she would take care of it, but it had just been something she couldn't share with anyone.
Khushi walked over to the playground and sat down in one of the swings, the wind blowing softly around her, giving her enough time to sit in silence without worrying about the impending storm, even the rain drops had let up for a few minutes.
Setting the swing in motion she slowly surveyed the school yard, it had changed over the years but Khushi could still remember every detail of her time at this school.
"I miss you Anjali", she whispered, "I really wish you were here, I've never needed you more than I do now".
"You know Anjali your brother is so stubborn, I'm sure he's off somewhere thinking he's doing what's best for me. He just doesn't understand how much I need him; he just doesn't understand how much I love him."
Taking a deep breath Khushi looked up at the sky and smiled, "He misses you so much, you were the one person who loved him with his whole heart", letting out a sigh she felt her eyes fill with tears, "I just wish he could see how much I love him, how much my family loves him", kicking at a stone near her foot she let out her frustrations, "Why doesn't he get it, he's not alone anymore!"
"I get it"
Khushi froze and everything around her stood still, the creaking of the swing as it gently swayed the only sound around her.
Khushi shook her head; it couldn't be him she thought, but that voice, she would know that voice anywhere.
Slowly turning in the swing she saw him.
Standing a few feet behind her, near the shrubs she had just planted stood the one person she had yearned for in the past 10 days, and if she was honest with herself, he was the one person she had probably yearned for since she knew what love is.
"Khushi".
His voice was low but strong, his eyes connecting with hers, never wavering for even a second.
Khushi closed her eyes, savoring the moment, savoring the sound of her name on his lips. She had always loved the way it sounded when he said it.
Standing up she turned towards him, wanting to drink him in with her eyes. She hadn't realized how starved she was just for a glimpse of him.
He was wearing dark jeans, and an old Northwestern tee-shirt topped by his favorite black leather jacket.
His hair seemed longer since she had last seen him, as if he had been plunging his fingers through it all day. His eyes sparkled with determination but Khushi didn't miss the tiredness the light circles under his eyes conveyed.
Their eyes remained locked on each other as they slowly moved towards the other.
Khushi's hand shook as she raised it to his face; the warmth of his cheek connecting with her palm forced the emotions of the past week to come forth.
"You're ok", whispered Khushi in more of a statement then a question.
Arnav closed his eyes as he savored her presence before him, "Now I am".
The wind whipped around them causing Khushi's hair to wrap around her face. Arnav moved closer as he gently tucked her hair behind her ear and brushed his thumb along her jawline.
"I'm sorry", he whispered with emotion, "I'm so sorry for leaving like that".
Khushi bit down on her bottom lip to hold back the tears that fought to come forth.
"Where were you? What happened?" she questioned, not in anger but confusion.
As angry as Khushi had been in the beginning, her love, her belief and her faith in this man had won over that anger. She knew he would be back, she just hoped he would be back for her.
Arnav shook his head as he tried to find the words that would show her what he had been through, what he had tried to accomplish by being apart from her.
"I needed to fix things; I couldn't be a part of this without being the person you deserved".
Khushi cupped his face, "You are all I want, nothing more, nothing less".
Arnav smiled as he placed his hand over hers, "I know that now".
Taking a deep breath he gulped down his fears and looked her in the eye, "I went to go see my parents".
Khushi let out a soft gasp at his words; he hadn't seen his parents in years.
"Oh Arnav, why?"
"I needed answers Khushi, I was sick of being in limbo with them. I knew I couldn't take this relationship to the next level without doing so. I want to start this journey with you with a full heart, a whole heart".
Lowering her hands in his, he held on tight as he thought over his words, "I saw my mom Khushi and she looked at me as if she didn't understand why I would want to meet with her", his voice shook as he tried to reign in his emotions, "They my dad ---", he laughed with a hollowness within it, "It took me 3 days to track him down, I didn't even know where he was".
Letting out a long sigh, he closed his eyes for a moment, "I asked them Khushi...I asked them why they left me, why they didn't love me?"
Shaking his head in anger, he squeezed her hands tighter, "They didn't even have an answer for me, can you believe that?", swallowing past the lump in his throat he continued, "That's when I realized what a fool I've been. I've been holding onto two people who don't have the ability to care for anyone beyond themselves. You know my mom told me that she never wanted to have kids or get married, but found herself pregnant with me, I never knew that".
Arnav shifted his eyes to look over Khushi's shoulder as the events of the past week played through his mind.
Biting down on his lower lip he looked back at Khushi, "After Anjali died...they felt like there was no point in continuing the pretense of a family. They thought I would be better off with your parents".
Khushi's heart squeezed with every word that left his lips, knowing how painful it must've been for him to confront them.
Leaning up she cupped his face in the warmth of her palms, "I feel sorry for them Arnav, they lost out on knowing an amazing person".
Arnav's lips lifted in a soft smile as his eyes blurred with his unshed tears, "I told them that I don't want anything to do with them anymore. That this was it, I'm done with them...and they agreed".
Khushi's eyes widened as the words just spoken by him registered in her mind, how could any parent be "ok" with walking away from their child, when that was the only child they had left?
"Oh Arnav" cried Khushi as she fell into his arms and wrapped him tightly in hers.
Wrapping his arms around her shivering frame he lowered his head to her neck and closed his eyes, feeling at peace for the first time in days.
"Shhh Khush, I'm ok. I'm so much better then ok", said Arnav as he placed a kiss on her jaw.
"Why didn't you take me with you?" asked Khushi
Arnav's eyes jumped up to hers, "No, no way!", shaking his head he continued, "I would never subject you to them, never want you to experience their coldness".
Arnav placed his hands on her shoulders and pulled her closer, "Your dad made me realize that my fears, my insecurities from my past were weighing me down, how could you love me completely if I didn't allow you in, how could you ever be a part of my insecurities if I always hid them from you?"
"I always thought there must be something wrong with me if my own parents didn't even care, how could I expect anyone else to care, to love me?"
The tears in Khushi's eyes continued to fall, "Oh Arnav", she whispered as she placed her hands against his chest and felt the pounding of his heart that was so in sync with hers.
"I'm tired to taking the fall for something I haven't done, it is their inability to love and care for their own child, it's not me Khushi", letting out a deep breath, his voice came out stronger and surer, "It's not me. Dad, mom, your brothers, and most importantly you, have made me realize that there is something in me that you love, that there is something in me that has nothing to do with the people who are supposed to be my parents that makes me a good person. I was raised in your family Khushi, so how can I go wrong?"
Khushi smiled through her tears as she saw the cobwebs of his past finally blow away in the wind.
"I thought you left me", said Khushi as her voice quivered, "But then after I thought about it, I knew ---------- I knew you wouldn't do that".
Arnav took the last step separating them and plunged his fingers in her hair holding her head firmly so that she couldn't question what was in his eyes, "Look at me Khushi, really look at me. I want you to see me...what you do to me", said Arnav, his voice heavy and ragged. "You are it for me Khushi. You are the end...and the beginning. I will fight for you, I will fight for us."
"You saved me a long time ago, I just couldn't accept the fact that I was worth saving until now. I thought I wasn't good enough for you, I thought for sure one day you would wake up and realize this and I wouldn't be able to stop you. The day you told me that you loved me, you saved me all over again, because that night for the first time I saw our future in your eyes".
"I'm not going to let my past hold be back", lowering his head so that she could feel his breath against her lips he whispered, "I choose us".
Rising up on her toes Khushi caught his lips as she whispered "I love you" against them. Her lips were the pathway to her soul, his lips worshipped her, the kiss spoke of devotion and everlasting love, so lost in each other they only broke apart when it became absolutely necessary
Leaning his forehead down against hers, he closed his eyes and mumbled, "I'm so sorry for hurting you to get to this point".
Khushi watched him open his eyes as he lifted his head, his eyes were full of sorrow for the past few weeks, but there was a light of hope that had never been present before.
"If your leaving has brought you back to me for good, then I would live through this week over and over again. No more apologies, got it?"
"Got it", responded Arnav with a smile.
"How did you know where to find me?" asked Khushi as she wrapped her arms around his middle.
"I went by your parent's place and then I realized what today was".
Khushi turned back to look at the jasmine shrubs, "Do you think she would've liked them?"
Arnav followed her gaze, "She would've loved them, and ------", taking a deep breath and remembering his sister with a smile he said, "She would've loved seeing us together in this spot".
Arnav slowly turned back to her and brushed his fingertips against her cheek, down to her lips, "I love you Khushi, it's always been you and it always will be", bending down he captured her lips again trying to erase the pain of the days passed.
Closing her eyes Khushi felt the sky open up above them, washing away all the pain, all the years apart, all the heartache they had to undergo.
Khushi knew they would spend the rest of their lives making up for lost time, lost moments.
Although Arnav felt that he needed to thank her for loving him, but he didn't realize how easy that had been for her.
Once she had known where her heart lay everything in her world had fallen into place. She couldn't imagine her life without him, because he was her life.
She had found her other half, her better half, her missing puzzle piece, and she would gladly spend the rest of her life letting him know, "It had to be you Arnav, it had to be you".
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