Posted:
Hello All,
I am flooding your inboxes with PMs since yesterday. Sorry about the spamming! But I cant seem to stop writing. So, I started writing this before the episode yesterday, and was asked by someone not to make it too weepy. Well, once I saw the episode, I couldnt control and ended up writing Ishita Ramblings which many of you may have read. Now that I got those feelings out of my system, I started re-writing this one. Hopefully, it makes up for the darkness in the last one & I promise, you wont cry!
Sorry Isha, this isn't funny as you expected, BUT this is supposed to be feel-good. Hope you like it. If you don't, make sure the chappals you throw dont have sharp heels, thats all I can ask 😆 (I included a dialogue you posted in the poll)
The song to go with this one is "Mere Dil mein aaj kya hai" from Daag
****
The bed was cold and he was shivering. He wasnt used to the AC, He remembered his bedroom which didnt need any artificial cooling. The breeze from the open windows was enough to put him to sleep. But the weather and the temperature conditions in his room weren't the cause of his insomnia. He was in a new room in a strange place, in a guest house far away from the warmth of his own four walls. It didnt help either that Shagun was in the adjoining room. This room felt like a prison, and this holiday, a sentence for crimes he did not have any control over while committing.
When he had mentioned the holiday to Ishita, he'd broken any last semblance of hope he had in their relationship. "When did you start needing permission from me Raman?" she had asked very frankly and then added on "You can take Ruhi with you, but please make sure she is taken care of. I would not want my daughter to suffer any kind of indifference from any of you. And make sure she calls me before she goes to bed."
"I am sorry Ishita, I will explain everything to you once this is over"
"Frankly Raman, I do not want to know any more. As rude as I may sound, I think you and Shagun deserve each other. She seems to know which buttons to push, and you, well, you look like you are dying for your buttons to be pushed, so what if the pretence is your son."
"Ishita, look, you and me..."
"Sorry Raman. There is no you and me. So once again, please don't justify or try to explain. Go and make sure Ruhi is taken care of. Otherwise all bets are off. You'll not know what hit you, if even one hair on my daughter's body is harmed."
Ruhi hadnt been easy to convince. She'd inherited his stubbornness and Ishita's morality. He should have known then, that this holiday would end up ruining his life.
"No papa. I wont go with you" is all his daughter had said to him. He'd looked pleadingly at her and then at Ishita.
"Ru beta, you should spend some time with your Bhaiyya and Mamma. So please go?" Ishita had said.
"Ishima, if you want me to spend time with Shagun mamma and Adi bhaiyya, why cant they come here to visit me? Why do I have I have to go ? and why can you not come Ishima?" Neither of her parents had an answer to that.
Since they'd arrived at the guest house however, Ruhi had been a darling. She had learnt from her Ishima about how to handle difficult situations. She had been nothing but polite to Shagun, and even tried talking to Adi a few times. Adi was ignoring her, which made Raman more sad and cynical. Wasn't Adi missing Ruhi, wasn't that the whole purpose of this trip? Adi's behaviour towards him and Ruhi sowed the seeds of doubt in him.
He heard a knock on the door, his first instinct was to ignore it. "It must be Shagun, the woman hasn't left me alone since we arrived. One would think that she was the wronged woman, and I was the one who left her!" he thought. "But it could be Ruhi, she wouldnt be able to sleep in a strange room either" Shagun had forced him to make Ruhi sleep in Adi's room "It will be good for them to bond" she'd said. When he opened the door, it wasn't Ruhi.
She was wearing red lacy nightgown, with a flimsy black robe over it. Her attire was covering her entire body, only it was not. She was dressed to seduce, blatantly. For a minute, Raman was jaw-dropped, not because he found her looks attractive, but because he couldnt believe the sight in front of him. She had one had on her hip and the other was balancing a bottle of red wine and 2 glasses she was holding by the stems. Her hip was jutting out a bit, and so was her pout. SHe had so much make-up on, that it was difficult to imagine someone needed this mask to go to sleep. Only sleep didnt seem like a priority for her. Her droopy eyes suggested, she had already had a couple of glasses to drink, or may be swallowed a sleeping pill or 2. He wasn't surprised.
His silence was obviously mistaken by her. She thought he was admiring her beauty, and casually but provocatively brushed past him and sat on his bed. "Do you see anything you like?" she asked with a fake huskiness in her voice.
Raman chuckled sarcastically. Only he didnt know if that sarcasm was aimed at her pathetic gestures, or his stupidity at being trapped by this woman once more. "Been there, Done that, Not interested, Shagun" She did not like it, but she couldn't let it show. She knew she had to try harder.
"Oh come on baby, dont be so mad now. I know you miss me, and truth be told, I havent been entirely happy without you either. I miss the love and praise you showered on me."
"Kyon, tumhaare 6 foot 2 inch lambu ka phone nahin lag raha hai kya?"
"Dont talk about him. Ashok lacks the soft touch you have Raman. I miss it so much"
"Shut Up Shagun. Seriously. And Get out. You dont look like you are in your senses"
"Come On Raman. I am in my senses for the first time in 6 years. How could I have let you go? and That too, to fall into the arms of that behenji?"
Thats when Raman knew. NOne of this was about Aditya. It wasn't about Ruhi. Heck, it wasnt about him either. It was all about Ishita. If he wasnt in the presence of that witch, he'd have slapped himself hard or at least broken a few pieces of furniture. HEre he was, CEO of the year, trapped in a room with a woman who was using him, and far away from the one who'd die before even thinking of using him. He felt like a fool would have been an understatement. Shagun had made him separate his daughter from the only mother she had known. Even if Ishita forgave him in the future, he wouldn't be able to.
He had to get Shagun out of the room. But the father in him knew that it was a very good opportunity to get Shagun spill the beans herself. Something about the way Adi had cried, and Shagun acted didnt sit right with him. It looked as if there was some piece of a puzzle he hadn't yet found. So he started slowly. "Leave all that Shagun, How is Adi doing? Is he feeling safe now, knowing you won't be sent to jail?"
She laughed in an evil manner. It was really strange that a beautiful face could contort such expressions. Why hadn't he seen it before? But that wasn't the time to ponder over her nature or his stupidity.
"Come on Raman, why would I go to jail?" He was shocked at her confidence. Here he was, trying to bribe police officers to hide evidence, so she didn't go to jail and his son had some semblance of normalcy in his life. He looked at her questioningly, while pouring some wine into the glasses. He offered her the one with a sizeable amount of alcohol in it, and mock-sipped the one he'd poured for himself.
"Oh well... I guess I should have told you. It wasnt me Raman, it was Adi"
His world crashed, only an enormous amount of will-power kept him from shattering the wine glass on the floor. "What?" he asked.
"It was Adi who did the accident. I told him I would take the blame. You know, I wanted to protect him from jail. I know you have doubts on my mothering skills, but see what I have done for our son? Do you get me now Raman?"
"I do Shagun. Maybe for the first time in my life, I understand you completely. And thank you for arranging this picnic. I wouldnt have had this chance at discovery otherwise"
She seemed pleased with herself and extended her hand to keep it on his thigh. He retracted immediately and his face showed real anger.
"What happened baby? Aren't you proud of me?"
"Proud? I realised earlier that you had used this excuse of a picnic to hurt Ishita. I thought I was the biggest fool on earth. But then you tell me this? Seriously Shagun, I cant believe I was ever stupid enough to fall in love with you. MOre than my hatred for you right now, is the disgust I feel at myself, for choosing you to bear my children."
"Oh Come on, like you wouldnt have done something like this for your son, had you known?"
"Oh, IF I would have taken blame for my son, and thats a BIG if, then I would have done it out of misguided love. Not misdirected"
He was losing her now. "What do you mean, I did this out of love for Adi, why else would I do this?"
"You did this because you love yourself Shagun, more than anything or anyone else in this world. If you would have told me on day 1 that Aditya was responsible, I would have hired a lawyer to get him out of this mess. I would have made sure he'd apologised to Amma, I would have made sure he got counselling. Above all I wouldn't have hidden it."
She knew she'd talked too much, but she couldnt stop him. He'd reached the right conclusion after all.
"With your lie and pretense of sacrifice, you have expertly manipulated both Adi and I. Once more. But this is the last time. I am glad I wasn't too late in realising this."
And with that, he went to the door, held it open and said "Get out Shagun, I need to call my wife"
He wanted to take a few minutes before he called Ishita. He had to formulate some kind of plan to talk to her. He didn't know where to begin. He was shivering again, and this time it wasnt the AC. All he knew was, he had to talk to her, listen to her voice. Even if it meant she unleashed her fury at him.
He dialled her number, there was no answer. He checked his watch, it was only 9:00 PM. He knew she wouldn't sleep so soon. So he thought she didn't want to talk to him. She had, after all, spoken to Ruhi earlier. So there would have been no need to re-connect again. He didn't call her mobile again. If she saw a bunch of missed calls from him, she'd be scared about Ruhi. So he called their landline. Neelu answered "Raman Bhaiyya, ghar pe koi nahin hai. Sab Amma Appa ke yahaan pe hain"
"Kyon, kya hua?" he was suddenly worried about Amma's health.
"Woh mujhe nahin pata bhaiyya. Amma aayi thi bulaane sab ko dinner pe". He felt relieved.
He called Pathak next and asked him to get some papers ready for the next day. He went into the kids' room. His daughter was curled up next to a photo of her Ishima and her with Mutthu. Raman felt sad once more, because he didn't have a place in that relationship, and may be he didn't deserve one after everything he'd just done.
He packed Ruhi's belongings and slowly picked her up. He was almost out the door when he heard Shagun.
"Kahaan jaa rahe ho Raman, kya hua? Adi, Adi beta... dekho papa kya kar rahe hain" Raman couldnt believe that even when drunk, Shagun did not lose the chance to manipulate him through his son.
Adi came out running and looked at him questioningly. "Aap kahaan ja rahe ho ? aapne promise kiya tha is holiday ke liye"
"Adi beta, main aapko disturb nahin karna chaahta tha. Please go back to sleep. I have to go now, and I promise I will see you tomorrow. And we will go on a longer picnic."
"Why are you doing this to my mother?" his son asked, clearly telling him whose intention it was to have the picnic in the first place.
With a heavy heart and a sigh, Raman told his son "Kal tumko Mayur Vihar le jaaonga beta. Maa kya hoti hai, tumhe pata chal jaayega."
When they finally got home, Raman went into their room first, and placed Ruhi on the bed. He told Neelu to take care of her and went to the Iyers'. He was not prepared for the scene there. There were too many people, and a couple with a child he'd never met. Everyone went quiet when he came in, none of the faces looked welcoming. The only one who even smiled at him, albeit sarcastically, was Bala's mother.
"Oh Raman, I had heard you'd taken your daughter to a picnic somewhere. That too with her real mother. See, didn't I tell the judge how you and Ishita married only for the child's custody? she didn't believe me then. But by the looks of it, I guess there isn't a custody problem any more no? How come you are back so early? Not that we aren't pleased to see you" she said, the one with the acid tongue. Before he could respond to her, she went on "By the way, meet my son Subbu and his wife. This is their baby."
Raman walked up to the man, and shook his hands firmly. Any other time, he would have made some sarcastic comments about him, but today Raman was not sure if Subbu was the one who'd hurt Ishita the most or if he was. Once the introductions were over, he looked at Bala's mother and said in a cold manner, "Thanks for welcoming me so warmly."
He looked for her, she wasn't there. The only other friendly face seemed to be of his father-in-law's. Appa came to him and asked him to have a seat. He said everyone was gathered here to celebrate Vandu's pregnancy news, and it was an impromptu dinner. The fact that all of them chose this night for the dinner; the night when he wouldn't be around, didnt escape him. But he deserved every cold shoulder, every unsaid remark and the caustic piercing eyes from everyone. That included his own flesh and blood. Even his mother, the epitome of blind parental love, was as mad at him as Amma was. He'd broken all their hearts. But he would start repairing with the one that mattered the most.
"Appa, where is Ishita?" he asked.
"Bala's mother was at her worst again today, so Ishu went into the bedroom to take a break. I am not sure if you should go in Raman" Appa whispered in his ears.
"I am sure I should Appa. Trust me" he said walking towards the room. On his way there, he said to Bala's mom "You are guest at my Amma's place and this is a celebration, so I won't throw you out. But if you ever hurt my wife again, believe me, I will forget that Bala is my friend and strangle you myself."
He went on to the room, and entered without knocking. She was sitting at the edge of the bed, looking at a photo of Ruhi. She wasn't crying anymore, but there was plenty of evidence on her face that she had been. She turned around when she heard the door open and stood up "Raman, aap yahaan? Is RUhi OK?" she'd forgotten her own sorrows.
"Yes, she is fine. Humaare room mein so rahi hai. Tum baitho, mujhe tumse baat karni hai"
"What do you want to say Raman? I don't think there is anything left for us to talk about"
"No, please listen Ishita. Let me tell you everything, I am ready to accept any punishment you dole out after that"
There was something in his eyes that made her relent. He wasn't the same man who had walked out the door earlier that day. She nodded as she sat down.
Raman started with the day he saw the car in Ashok's building. To his surprise, she did not interrupt him once. She did not react either. She listened quietly. Once he had finished telling her everything, including everything that had happened earlier with Shagun, she told him "Raman, I need some time to digest all this" That's all he could get out of her. She wasn't angry, she was just dejected. She looked like someone who didn't have anything and who had lost any hope of ever having anything.
"Come home with me please" he pleaded.
"Not tonight Raman. I will try and be in before Ruhi wakes up. If she does wake up earlier, please tell her that I am sleeping here because I did not want to sleep there without her."
He knew she needed some time. And with what he had planned, he needed a good night's rest too.The next morning was going to be eventful for sure. "OK Ishita, but I promise you. Starting now, I am going to spend every waking moment of my life making it up to you. I will ask for your forgiveness with all my heart, and every action of mine will be to re-build our relationship. I have wasted too much time already. I am sorry" he said and walked out, before he could start crying. He did not want to weep any more. He'd been crying too much in the past few days, but that was because he was morally torn. Now, he knew what he wanted, and he knew what he was going to
do to achieve it.
In the morning, at the breakfast table, the Bhalla family was still quiet. No one knew what has transpired between Raman and Ishita. They only knew that she was back some time in the morning, and was quietly helping Neelu in the kitchen. Ruhi came running out of the bedroom and hugged her mother. While they were having an animated conversation, Neil was at their door. Raman came out to meet him and took 2 files from him and went back into the room without even looking at his parents. While at the door to their room, he said "Ruhi, apni Ishima ko bolna andar aaye please, mujhe zaroori baat karni hai"
In the privacy of their room, Raman handed her the first file. "This is the paperwork to challenge Adi's custody. Neil sat up all night and drafted these. He's confident that with the recent developments, any judge would agree to this appeal, and at least this time, we would have a fair decision. I am sure they'll reverse the original decision"
"That's a good decision Raman. I am glad you are fighting for your son. Adi needs love, unselfish love. And I believe he will get it here in abundance." she said quietly.
"The next one is something that will affect you Ishita. And I think, after the last few days, you will also think its necessary. Some times, it takes us the harsh reality to make us realise what is right and what is wrong. and I am an idiot for not thinking about this before"
Her heart missed a beat. What was he trying to say? Was he giving her a way out of his life? Was he that apologetic that he wanted to free her? She couldn't help but let out a small cry.
He held her hands then. And said "These are papers for you to formally adopt Ruhi"
"Huh?" she said, confused.
"I know you and I have custody. But till you are legally declared her parent, you will never feel safe. I dont mean that you need this piece of paper to prove to the likes of Bala's mother that you are Ruhi's mom. BUT, practically, you need this. Especially after the way I treated your relationship with her. I had no right to take her from here. I had no right to be so inconsiderate. And if this piece of paper is needed for you to assert your relation with Ruhi, then so be it. I never want you to feel like any other person, including Ruhi's biological parents have any more right over her than you do. And after what I have seen Shagun do, I do not want to even imagine a scenario in the future where she could come back into Ruhi's life. I want everyone, including you and me, to stop walking on eggshells where Ruhi's parenthood is concerned. You and me are equal in that regard, at least legally. Emotionally, I know you will be a far more superior parent to her than I ever can" He was amazed at his self-control, he hadn't shed a tear.
"Raman, are you sure?" she asked, not believing what she was hearing. As much as he'd hurt her, he'd fixed the one thing that was bothering her the most. She couldn't help but smile while crying.
"Yes Ishita. Of course, that also means, you can leave me whenever you want, now that you have Ruhi. Any judge worth their salt would hand over Ruhi to you happily, I wouldnt even be able to put up a fight" he tried to bring humour into the conversation. "But I hope you dont. LIke I said, I want to make it up to you, and you would't let go of a chance to see my grovelling, would you? I will do whatever it takes"
"We have a long way ahead Raman. I cannot forgive you yet, you did not just hurt the mother in me, but the wife too. But this is a good start"
"Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it." - Mark Twain
**** SO, how was it???
P.S - please excuse any mistakes I have made with the 'legality' of custody versus adoption. I am not sure if what I have written is true in the Indian judicial context.
I am flooding your inboxes with PMs since yesterday. Sorry about the spamming! But I cant seem to stop writing. So, I started writing this before the episode yesterday, and was asked by someone not to make it too weepy. Well, once I saw the episode, I couldnt control and ended up writing Ishita Ramblings which many of you may have read. Now that I got those feelings out of my system, I started re-writing this one. Hopefully, it makes up for the darkness in the last one & I promise, you wont cry!
Sorry Isha, this isn't funny as you expected, BUT this is supposed to be feel-good. Hope you like it. If you don't, make sure the chappals you throw dont have sharp heels, thats all I can ask 😆 (I included a dialogue you posted in the poll)
The song to go with this one is "Mere Dil mein aaj kya hai" from Daag
****
The bed was cold and he was shivering. He wasnt used to the AC, He remembered his bedroom which didnt need any artificial cooling. The breeze from the open windows was enough to put him to sleep. But the weather and the temperature conditions in his room weren't the cause of his insomnia. He was in a new room in a strange place, in a guest house far away from the warmth of his own four walls. It didnt help either that Shagun was in the adjoining room. This room felt like a prison, and this holiday, a sentence for crimes he did not have any control over while committing.
When he had mentioned the holiday to Ishita, he'd broken any last semblance of hope he had in their relationship. "When did you start needing permission from me Raman?" she had asked very frankly and then added on "You can take Ruhi with you, but please make sure she is taken care of. I would not want my daughter to suffer any kind of indifference from any of you. And make sure she calls me before she goes to bed."
"I am sorry Ishita, I will explain everything to you once this is over"
"Frankly Raman, I do not want to know any more. As rude as I may sound, I think you and Shagun deserve each other. She seems to know which buttons to push, and you, well, you look like you are dying for your buttons to be pushed, so what if the pretence is your son."
"Ishita, look, you and me..."
"Sorry Raman. There is no you and me. So once again, please don't justify or try to explain. Go and make sure Ruhi is taken care of. Otherwise all bets are off. You'll not know what hit you, if even one hair on my daughter's body is harmed."
Ruhi hadnt been easy to convince. She'd inherited his stubbornness and Ishita's morality. He should have known then, that this holiday would end up ruining his life.
"No papa. I wont go with you" is all his daughter had said to him. He'd looked pleadingly at her and then at Ishita.
"Ru beta, you should spend some time with your Bhaiyya and Mamma. So please go?" Ishita had said.
"Ishima, if you want me to spend time with Shagun mamma and Adi bhaiyya, why cant they come here to visit me? Why do I have I have to go ? and why can you not come Ishima?" Neither of her parents had an answer to that.
Since they'd arrived at the guest house however, Ruhi had been a darling. She had learnt from her Ishima about how to handle difficult situations. She had been nothing but polite to Shagun, and even tried talking to Adi a few times. Adi was ignoring her, which made Raman more sad and cynical. Wasn't Adi missing Ruhi, wasn't that the whole purpose of this trip? Adi's behaviour towards him and Ruhi sowed the seeds of doubt in him.
He heard a knock on the door, his first instinct was to ignore it. "It must be Shagun, the woman hasn't left me alone since we arrived. One would think that she was the wronged woman, and I was the one who left her!" he thought. "But it could be Ruhi, she wouldnt be able to sleep in a strange room either" Shagun had forced him to make Ruhi sleep in Adi's room "It will be good for them to bond" she'd said. When he opened the door, it wasn't Ruhi.
She was wearing red lacy nightgown, with a flimsy black robe over it. Her attire was covering her entire body, only it was not. She was dressed to seduce, blatantly. For a minute, Raman was jaw-dropped, not because he found her looks attractive, but because he couldnt believe the sight in front of him. She had one had on her hip and the other was balancing a bottle of red wine and 2 glasses she was holding by the stems. Her hip was jutting out a bit, and so was her pout. SHe had so much make-up on, that it was difficult to imagine someone needed this mask to go to sleep. Only sleep didnt seem like a priority for her. Her droopy eyes suggested, she had already had a couple of glasses to drink, or may be swallowed a sleeping pill or 2. He wasn't surprised.
His silence was obviously mistaken by her. She thought he was admiring her beauty, and casually but provocatively brushed past him and sat on his bed. "Do you see anything you like?" she asked with a fake huskiness in her voice.
Raman chuckled sarcastically. Only he didnt know if that sarcasm was aimed at her pathetic gestures, or his stupidity at being trapped by this woman once more. "Been there, Done that, Not interested, Shagun" She did not like it, but she couldn't let it show. She knew she had to try harder.
"Oh come on baby, dont be so mad now. I know you miss me, and truth be told, I havent been entirely happy without you either. I miss the love and praise you showered on me."
"Kyon, tumhaare 6 foot 2 inch lambu ka phone nahin lag raha hai kya?"
"Dont talk about him. Ashok lacks the soft touch you have Raman. I miss it so much"
"Shut Up Shagun. Seriously. And Get out. You dont look like you are in your senses"
"Come On Raman. I am in my senses for the first time in 6 years. How could I have let you go? and That too, to fall into the arms of that behenji?"
Thats when Raman knew. NOne of this was about Aditya. It wasn't about Ruhi. Heck, it wasnt about him either. It was all about Ishita. If he wasnt in the presence of that witch, he'd have slapped himself hard or at least broken a few pieces of furniture. HEre he was, CEO of the year, trapped in a room with a woman who was using him, and far away from the one who'd die before even thinking of using him. He felt like a fool would have been an understatement. Shagun had made him separate his daughter from the only mother she had known. Even if Ishita forgave him in the future, he wouldn't be able to.
He had to get Shagun out of the room. But the father in him knew that it was a very good opportunity to get Shagun spill the beans herself. Something about the way Adi had cried, and Shagun acted didnt sit right with him. It looked as if there was some piece of a puzzle he hadn't yet found. So he started slowly. "Leave all that Shagun, How is Adi doing? Is he feeling safe now, knowing you won't be sent to jail?"
She laughed in an evil manner. It was really strange that a beautiful face could contort such expressions. Why hadn't he seen it before? But that wasn't the time to ponder over her nature or his stupidity.
"Come on Raman, why would I go to jail?" He was shocked at her confidence. Here he was, trying to bribe police officers to hide evidence, so she didn't go to jail and his son had some semblance of normalcy in his life. He looked at her questioningly, while pouring some wine into the glasses. He offered her the one with a sizeable amount of alcohol in it, and mock-sipped the one he'd poured for himself.
"Oh well... I guess I should have told you. It wasnt me Raman, it was Adi"
His world crashed, only an enormous amount of will-power kept him from shattering the wine glass on the floor. "What?" he asked.
"It was Adi who did the accident. I told him I would take the blame. You know, I wanted to protect him from jail. I know you have doubts on my mothering skills, but see what I have done for our son? Do you get me now Raman?"
"I do Shagun. Maybe for the first time in my life, I understand you completely. And thank you for arranging this picnic. I wouldnt have had this chance at discovery otherwise"
She seemed pleased with herself and extended her hand to keep it on his thigh. He retracted immediately and his face showed real anger.
"What happened baby? Aren't you proud of me?"
"Proud? I realised earlier that you had used this excuse of a picnic to hurt Ishita. I thought I was the biggest fool on earth. But then you tell me this? Seriously Shagun, I cant believe I was ever stupid enough to fall in love with you. MOre than my hatred for you right now, is the disgust I feel at myself, for choosing you to bear my children."
"Oh Come on, like you wouldnt have done something like this for your son, had you known?"
"Oh, IF I would have taken blame for my son, and thats a BIG if, then I would have done it out of misguided love. Not misdirected"
He was losing her now. "What do you mean, I did this out of love for Adi, why else would I do this?"
"You did this because you love yourself Shagun, more than anything or anyone else in this world. If you would have told me on day 1 that Aditya was responsible, I would have hired a lawyer to get him out of this mess. I would have made sure he'd apologised to Amma, I would have made sure he got counselling. Above all I wouldn't have hidden it."
She knew she'd talked too much, but she couldnt stop him. He'd reached the right conclusion after all.
"With your lie and pretense of sacrifice, you have expertly manipulated both Adi and I. Once more. But this is the last time. I am glad I wasn't too late in realising this."
And with that, he went to the door, held it open and said "Get out Shagun, I need to call my wife"
He wanted to take a few minutes before he called Ishita. He had to formulate some kind of plan to talk to her. He didn't know where to begin. He was shivering again, and this time it wasnt the AC. All he knew was, he had to talk to her, listen to her voice. Even if it meant she unleashed her fury at him.
He dialled her number, there was no answer. He checked his watch, it was only 9:00 PM. He knew she wouldn't sleep so soon. So he thought she didn't want to talk to him. She had, after all, spoken to Ruhi earlier. So there would have been no need to re-connect again. He didn't call her mobile again. If she saw a bunch of missed calls from him, she'd be scared about Ruhi. So he called their landline. Neelu answered "Raman Bhaiyya, ghar pe koi nahin hai. Sab Amma Appa ke yahaan pe hain"
"Kyon, kya hua?" he was suddenly worried about Amma's health.
"Woh mujhe nahin pata bhaiyya. Amma aayi thi bulaane sab ko dinner pe". He felt relieved.
He called Pathak next and asked him to get some papers ready for the next day. He went into the kids' room. His daughter was curled up next to a photo of her Ishima and her with Mutthu. Raman felt sad once more, because he didn't have a place in that relationship, and may be he didn't deserve one after everything he'd just done.
He packed Ruhi's belongings and slowly picked her up. He was almost out the door when he heard Shagun.
"Kahaan jaa rahe ho Raman, kya hua? Adi, Adi beta... dekho papa kya kar rahe hain" Raman couldnt believe that even when drunk, Shagun did not lose the chance to manipulate him through his son.
Adi came out running and looked at him questioningly. "Aap kahaan ja rahe ho ? aapne promise kiya tha is holiday ke liye"
"Adi beta, main aapko disturb nahin karna chaahta tha. Please go back to sleep. I have to go now, and I promise I will see you tomorrow. And we will go on a longer picnic."
"Why are you doing this to my mother?" his son asked, clearly telling him whose intention it was to have the picnic in the first place.
With a heavy heart and a sigh, Raman told his son "Kal tumko Mayur Vihar le jaaonga beta. Maa kya hoti hai, tumhe pata chal jaayega."
When they finally got home, Raman went into their room first, and placed Ruhi on the bed. He told Neelu to take care of her and went to the Iyers'. He was not prepared for the scene there. There were too many people, and a couple with a child he'd never met. Everyone went quiet when he came in, none of the faces looked welcoming. The only one who even smiled at him, albeit sarcastically, was Bala's mother.
"Oh Raman, I had heard you'd taken your daughter to a picnic somewhere. That too with her real mother. See, didn't I tell the judge how you and Ishita married only for the child's custody? she didn't believe me then. But by the looks of it, I guess there isn't a custody problem any more no? How come you are back so early? Not that we aren't pleased to see you" she said, the one with the acid tongue. Before he could respond to her, she went on "By the way, meet my son Subbu and his wife. This is their baby."
Raman walked up to the man, and shook his hands firmly. Any other time, he would have made some sarcastic comments about him, but today Raman was not sure if Subbu was the one who'd hurt Ishita the most or if he was. Once the introductions were over, he looked at Bala's mother and said in a cold manner, "Thanks for welcoming me so warmly."
He looked for her, she wasn't there. The only other friendly face seemed to be of his father-in-law's. Appa came to him and asked him to have a seat. He said everyone was gathered here to celebrate Vandu's pregnancy news, and it was an impromptu dinner. The fact that all of them chose this night for the dinner; the night when he wouldn't be around, didnt escape him. But he deserved every cold shoulder, every unsaid remark and the caustic piercing eyes from everyone. That included his own flesh and blood. Even his mother, the epitome of blind parental love, was as mad at him as Amma was. He'd broken all their hearts. But he would start repairing with the one that mattered the most.
"Appa, where is Ishita?" he asked.
"Bala's mother was at her worst again today, so Ishu went into the bedroom to take a break. I am not sure if you should go in Raman" Appa whispered in his ears.
"I am sure I should Appa. Trust me" he said walking towards the room. On his way there, he said to Bala's mom "You are guest at my Amma's place and this is a celebration, so I won't throw you out. But if you ever hurt my wife again, believe me, I will forget that Bala is my friend and strangle you myself."
He went on to the room, and entered without knocking. She was sitting at the edge of the bed, looking at a photo of Ruhi. She wasn't crying anymore, but there was plenty of evidence on her face that she had been. She turned around when she heard the door open and stood up "Raman, aap yahaan? Is RUhi OK?" she'd forgotten her own sorrows.
"Yes, she is fine. Humaare room mein so rahi hai. Tum baitho, mujhe tumse baat karni hai"
"What do you want to say Raman? I don't think there is anything left for us to talk about"
"No, please listen Ishita. Let me tell you everything, I am ready to accept any punishment you dole out after that"
There was something in his eyes that made her relent. He wasn't the same man who had walked out the door earlier that day. She nodded as she sat down.
Raman started with the day he saw the car in Ashok's building. To his surprise, she did not interrupt him once. She did not react either. She listened quietly. Once he had finished telling her everything, including everything that had happened earlier with Shagun, she told him "Raman, I need some time to digest all this" That's all he could get out of her. She wasn't angry, she was just dejected. She looked like someone who didn't have anything and who had lost any hope of ever having anything.
"Come home with me please" he pleaded.
"Not tonight Raman. I will try and be in before Ruhi wakes up. If she does wake up earlier, please tell her that I am sleeping here because I did not want to sleep there without her."
He knew she needed some time. And with what he had planned, he needed a good night's rest too.The next morning was going to be eventful for sure. "OK Ishita, but I promise you. Starting now, I am going to spend every waking moment of my life making it up to you. I will ask for your forgiveness with all my heart, and every action of mine will be to re-build our relationship. I have wasted too much time already. I am sorry" he said and walked out, before he could start crying. He did not want to weep any more. He'd been crying too much in the past few days, but that was because he was morally torn. Now, he knew what he wanted, and he knew what he was going to
do to achieve it.
In the morning, at the breakfast table, the Bhalla family was still quiet. No one knew what has transpired between Raman and Ishita. They only knew that she was back some time in the morning, and was quietly helping Neelu in the kitchen. Ruhi came running out of the bedroom and hugged her mother. While they were having an animated conversation, Neil was at their door. Raman came out to meet him and took 2 files from him and went back into the room without even looking at his parents. While at the door to their room, he said "Ruhi, apni Ishima ko bolna andar aaye please, mujhe zaroori baat karni hai"
In the privacy of their room, Raman handed her the first file. "This is the paperwork to challenge Adi's custody. Neil sat up all night and drafted these. He's confident that with the recent developments, any judge would agree to this appeal, and at least this time, we would have a fair decision. I am sure they'll reverse the original decision"
"That's a good decision Raman. I am glad you are fighting for your son. Adi needs love, unselfish love. And I believe he will get it here in abundance." she said quietly.
"The next one is something that will affect you Ishita. And I think, after the last few days, you will also think its necessary. Some times, it takes us the harsh reality to make us realise what is right and what is wrong. and I am an idiot for not thinking about this before"
Her heart missed a beat. What was he trying to say? Was he giving her a way out of his life? Was he that apologetic that he wanted to free her? She couldn't help but let out a small cry.
He held her hands then. And said "These are papers for you to formally adopt Ruhi"
"Huh?" she said, confused.
"I know you and I have custody. But till you are legally declared her parent, you will never feel safe. I dont mean that you need this piece of paper to prove to the likes of Bala's mother that you are Ruhi's mom. BUT, practically, you need this. Especially after the way I treated your relationship with her. I had no right to take her from here. I had no right to be so inconsiderate. And if this piece of paper is needed for you to assert your relation with Ruhi, then so be it. I never want you to feel like any other person, including Ruhi's biological parents have any more right over her than you do. And after what I have seen Shagun do, I do not want to even imagine a scenario in the future where she could come back into Ruhi's life. I want everyone, including you and me, to stop walking on eggshells where Ruhi's parenthood is concerned. You and me are equal in that regard, at least legally. Emotionally, I know you will be a far more superior parent to her than I ever can" He was amazed at his self-control, he hadn't shed a tear.
"Raman, are you sure?" she asked, not believing what she was hearing. As much as he'd hurt her, he'd fixed the one thing that was bothering her the most. She couldn't help but smile while crying.
"Yes Ishita. Of course, that also means, you can leave me whenever you want, now that you have Ruhi. Any judge worth their salt would hand over Ruhi to you happily, I wouldnt even be able to put up a fight" he tried to bring humour into the conversation. "But I hope you dont. LIke I said, I want to make it up to you, and you would't let go of a chance to see my grovelling, would you? I will do whatever it takes"
"We have a long way ahead Raman. I cannot forgive you yet, you did not just hurt the mother in me, but the wife too. But this is a good start"
"Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it." - Mark Twain
**** SO, how was it???
P.S - please excuse any mistakes I have made with the 'legality' of custody versus adoption. I am not sure if what I have written is true in the Indian judicial context.
Seher Hone Ko Hai
Cricket
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