Finding Cinderella |A KR OS|

Finding Cinderella

And everyone looks so happy like this is what they wanted from a long time. Today The Ghai mansion itself looks like a bride with all lights and flowers. Everything everywhere is shining that it somewhere hurts my eyes. The clouds in my mind making it impossible for me to feel how much it actually shines or is it just illusion? I don't know the reason of this feeling. Or do I know? Sigh! This is my choice of marriage with Reyaansh whom I dating from long three years. Yes. Three years, when nowdays teenagers change their boy friends as the flavor of the ice-cream. These three years were like dream. With my career touching so many high points, a soothing personal life is any girl's dream. And I admire him for giving me that comfortable life. Those late night calls, sometimes dinner and his affection towards me. And I fell for him more. Much more because the space he has given to me, the feeling when a relation does not feel like a string which is pulling and pushing you continuously. As it was going very smooth, and we took this decision together! Cheers! Let's get married. As my parents were so much tensed to see their daughter having no plan of marriage even being thirty years old, this news was like a drop of water in hot summer. They were happy for me. And I got the peace to see them happy. It was never a problem from Reyaansh's side. His parents were happy to see their son finally taking a step towards life. They believed in his choice and happy accepted me with open arms.

A fairytale it is.

It was. But it doesn't look like fairytale to me anymore. The day when Reyaansh told me that his parents were convinced to move on with us, it was like a splash of cold water. No. I didn't expect it to go in this way. For me our marriage consists of two people. Me and Rey. So the sudden entry of his parents broke the chain of the way I thought our marriage would be. Our future is our dream. Its our way how we will decorate our room, depends on us what to cook after returning from office or even not to cook or just have Maggie. I fear about responsibilities. If I say it clearly, then yes. Its not easy for me to settle down with his parents. I have my own view to shape up my future and taking care of his parents doesn't fit in that picture. Only if he could understand that. Reyaansh have been always a caring son, being the CEO of a multinational company doesn't affect that image of the guy who always first run to his mother if any problem arrives. Be it a problem of office or personal. And this does scare me. Questions my individuality. After two three years picturing myself as a dutiful wife, mother and bahu, is something a nightmare for me. But as its human nature to try, I tried to fit myself in that picture but couldn't. And right now, when my sisters, cousins are running here and there, my father asking the decorator to put more flowers in the railing of the staircase, my mother telling everyone how lucky she is to get a damaat like Reyaansh, a big smile on their face indicating that they are very happy for me, still I'm trying. Very hard.

"Oh, Kriya, still you are here! Let's go yaar, everyone is waiting for your mehendi", the chirping voice of my cousin breaks the thoughts that are making me uncomfortable from two months. And suddenly I realize Its already too late. Too late to take a decision. I have always remained clear about my intentions and dreams regarding this marriage and I don't want to break that image and to fool him anymore. I need to do this. At least for myself. I need my own space, this is I am very particular about. Grabbing my phone from the bed, I try to type and press the send button.

"Need to talk. Meet me at coffee shop at sharp 7 pm. <3"

*******

7.16 pm..

The same strong essence of the coffee and the same coffee shop. From where it all started. From innocent flirting between two strangers to some passionate moments. A long way it was. Not very smooth but quite comfortable. But why the air feels so heavy today? Like just a mere force and it will start raining? As if it also has a sense to guess that something is going to fall apart?

"I cant do this anymore, Reyaansh", I finally said gathering all the strength I have. The question slaps me one more time if I really can't do this or I don't want to do this. Some questions have no answers. Ever.

"What?", he asked taking one spoon of sugar more, as this is just like another day. Wearing a Grey T shirt with dark blue Jeans he looks so handsome that it hurts my eyes.

"I just don't want to live with your parents after our marriage, Reyaansh. I should have told you before. Its just I was too confused. It hurts me to say this but this is true. I don't want to fool you anymore", I said keeping my eyes at the ground knowing that I failed, disappointing him once again. Time to time. The incident of that day knocks my mind. That day when he asked me to come with him in a business party and I refused. Yes, I promised one of my friends to go with her for shopping. Saying No to my friend was quite impossible but refusing Reyaansh was very easy for me that moment. It forces me to question myself that how many times I have actually failed? Is it uncountable?

Sometimes things fall apart so that better things fall together.

But there is any guarantee of that?

He keeps moving his fingers on the table making different shapes which I can't understand. Sometimes I wonder if I ever tried to understand Reyaansh. If we see this from a third person's point of view, then yes. This relation, always revolves around Kriya. Her happiness, her problems. Reyaansh is the one who compromises every single time. I feel ashamed to say that even this time the scenario does not change.

"So what we should do now? Lets call off the marriage", he says breaking the silence as if nothing happened. "I can handle my parents but your parents are impossible. But lets try". He does surprise me again. The guy who took care every arrangement of this marriage, helping my parents as their son, but now calling off the marriage is also so easy for him? Or again its about my ego that twitching her palms to see that my decision does not affect him anymore. And I surprise myself again for crossing the level of selfishness.

"Yes, lets hope we can handle it together. Thank you Reyaansh. For understanding me.", at least this thanks he deserves after all these.

"And you're welcome. Now lets go, looks like it going to rain", he said so casually taking the key of his car from the table."

The moment I step outside of the coffee shop, it starts raining. I can see Reyaansh walking towards his car. Looks like everything is slipping from my hand and I'm letting it go. Drops of water washing away the bright colour of the mehendi that was supposed to the proof how much strong our love was. And I can feel a pool of salty water making their way from my eyes. Why I am crying? Why now? This is what I wanted. The freedom, the independence. He gave me all of that not even questioning me a single time. Why it is like my heart is saying to try once again? Just one more time? And I start running towards his car.

I have always wanted more. Wanted perfection. And this is nowhere near to perfection. So how this can be the end? A little more selfishness is not going to end this world.

I stop him from starting his car and shamelessly ask him, "What's now Reyaansh? Where we go from here?". He opens the door and pull me harshly towards him. This is the moment , I feel I'm going to lose everything. And it does feel like, I am even losing hope.

"Nowhere. We will meet tomorrow as everyday. These three years were enough for me to know you, Kriya. And I love you despite knowing your faults. This marriage is not more important than you, not much precious than those moments we spent together. Why can't you understand that?"

I feel like crying harder.

"Can you remember , once you told me that you always want to take care of your parents, want to keep them with you always and you are thankful to god for sending them as your mom-dad? It is same for me too, Kriya. I can't choose. My parents and you both are important to me. And I hoped that you would understand. But you didn't. It does not mean that it ends here. I realized we tried to go faster when the road was not at all smooth. Despite knowing your insecurities, you fear about marriage, your trust issue, I forced you. And I am sorry for that. I just wanted a happily ever after' for us."

I just pull him towards me hugging him tightly. I have no idea how or If I deserve him. He keeps saying.

"When I was younger, my mom told me the story of Cinderella. From then it was my imagination, my fantasy that my girl would be just like her. Perfection. I know, you are not perfect Kriya. Even I'm not. The mistakes we do, the wrong decisions we take make us perfect. If we, together keep going through more mistakes and as people says if it does make us better human being then who knows may be someday you will be my Cinderella?"

Maybe someday.

And Reyaansh Singhania feels it sort of euphoric, like they are in some sort of fairy tale. Like she is Tinkerbell and he is Peter Pan. No, wait. He doesn't want to be Peter Pan. Maybe she can be like Cinderella and he will be her Prince Charming.

I look at the sky, keeping my faith alive for us, a big balloon with advertisement is moving. Like a big bubble of air. Like the beauty of those sudden beautiful moments which don't even give any guarantee about their existence. Keeping those moments in our heart we all try to live. Try to stand up once again.

_________

The inspiration behind this OS was a conversation between my mom and me. We always claim to love our parents very much, need their support always but we do hesitate thinking about a joint family. 'A happily ever after' can be this way also when you take you mother in law for shopping and kick your husband from that list. 😆 Think about it once. The name of this one shot is taken from Colleen Hoover's 'Finding Cinderella'. Give that novel a chance. You will fall in love. Let me know what do you think about this one shot. Thanks.