Chasing Dreams- Thd7 CHP42, PG 130, Link to THD8 & CHP43, PG143 - Page 50

Am loving this you are not only showing the real reasons but the way you have written this update is just amazing

Finally finally he got some sense.. Superb update dear:-))

I loved this update who ever this doctor is Ms. Roy you are awesome. The conversation about the heart beat was heart warming. Arnav will he realize will khushi give Arnav his position as a father. But he still says he has not fully accepted the child ? what will happen next. eagrly waiting for the next chapter

I am impressed at maturity of Dr.Roy...Her dialogues have made some crack in Arnav's resolve...Uuufff...This was sooo awesssome update...

Brilliant update !!! A very controversial topic dealt with facts and sensitivity. I love the doc and the way she tried to salvage the situation.

Arnav started thinking, but the fact remains that he does not want the baby. He now will not push Khushi if she wants the baby.

The docters words perfectly apply to Khushi. She is already at a low point in her life, if she goes ahead and abort her child, she would never be able to forgive herself. But she is also not strong enough to have a baby on her own without anyones support.

After this her relation with her parents as well as with Arnav will never be the same. she might forgive Arnav eventually if and when they get together again for the pain she went through. But it would be difficult to forget/forgive the calluos way he treated their baby.

She will have to learn to stand on her own and come out strong. I don't mind much if she completely break her relation with arnav and starts a new life with a new man.

I am happy atleast someone was able to put some sense in arnav.continue soon.great update.was so scared for the innocent one.

fantastic update NB

Chapter 38B-

*Reader discretion required as some parts may be upsetting.*

Arnav followed Khushi out of the room, she was already waiting for an elevator. He called out her name, but she didn't respond. She got into the elevator to go to the lab and Arnav just about managed to get inside.

Khushi.. I... Can we talk, please?' He asked, short of breath.

Khushi didn't spare him even a glance. After her conversation with Dr. Roy all she wanted to do was to focus on her baby and arrive at a decision. She didn't have the time for Arnav's opinions anymore, when he had made it obvious that he would have nothing to do with the pregnancy.

Khushi please, lets talk.' Arnav pleaded.

When she hadn't still responded, Arnav declared Khushi you can keep the baby, I'm willing to marry you.'

Khushi looked at him like she was ready to kill him.

Do you think this is some sort of a joke Arnav?' She fumed.

Khushi you heard what Dr Roy said about abortion. I don't want you to go through all of this because of me.'

Just then the elevator arrived at its destination. 'Arnav I need to complete the blood test first.' Khushi stalled.

Fine, lets talk after the test. But we are talking about this, there is no escaping that.'

Khushi said, Whatever..' and walked away as Arnav meekly followed her.

Once the blood test was over Arnav requested Khushi to come along with him to a cafe near-by so that they could talk in peace. Khushi had begrudgingly accepted as she was keen to hear what he had to say now.

What is that you want to talk Arnav? I think you made it perfectly clear as to what I must do with the foetus.' Khushi added the last word to spite him.

Arnav took a breath in and decided to remain cool headed no matter what Khushi said. Khushi based on what the Doctor said, I don't want you to abort the baby if thats not something you want too. I'm willing to get married to you.'

Why did you change your mind Arnav?'

Let me be honest, given a choice I dont want to do this. But a lot has transpired in the last few days. And I dont want you to fight all those battles on your own anymore. And if our marriage would make everyone's life better including yours, the child's and your parent's, then so be it.'

So are you proposing a marriage of convenience? Are you doing this out of pity? Because if thats what it is, let me tell you, that I may be helpless, I maybe weak hearted, I maybe alone at the moment, but I still have my self-respect intact.'

Khushi can you please consider my request with an open mind. We have to see the doctor in the next two hours and arrive at a decision. Cant we park our relationship issues aside for the moment and think about your pregnancy?'

You mean the foetus.' Khushi bit out again. That one word Arnav had used the other day haunted her every single moment.

Arnav closed his eyes and calmed himself. Khushi had every reason to snap at him, but he couldn't lose sight of the bigger issue and get into another argument.

Khushi, I didn't understand the complete implications of my decision about your pregnancy. I didn't know the baby has a heart beat by now.' He then added with a sense of desperation, Dammit I screwed up! Can you give me a chance to make up for my mistake and not punish yourself or the baby to get back at me, please?'

And what makes you think I still want to get married to you?

When Arnav hadn't replied, she added, What is the guarantee that after a few months you won't walk out leaving me and my child alone, telling us that you aren't cut out to be a father or a husband?' Khushi expressed her innermost fears. Given Arnav's commitment phobic streak, she understood that it would only be a matter of time before his issues cropped up again. And she would stand to lose out more in the future than now.

Dammit Khushi! Is this a game one-upmanship? Arnav finally snapped. The choice is yours to make. If you want to keep the baby, we can go straight to a registrar from here and get married. I leave it to you to decide.'

I need some time to think about this.' Khushi announced and decided to put Arnav out of his misery. She wished she could throw his offer right back at his face, but the truth of the matter was that, there was a baby growing inside her. As much as she hated to admit it, she needed his support one way or the other. So now was not the time to let their relationship issues cloud her mind.

"""""""

After finishing her sandwich, Khushi decided to go to a nearby park for a walk on her own. She wanted to think through what Arnav said and arrive at a decision.

Before leaving she told Arnav. Arnav, whatever has transpired in the past two days cannot be undone. The things you have said cannot be forgotten or forgiven. Please don't be under any illusion that things will be back to what they were before, if I agree to this wedding arrangement. I'm not sure if I can trust you or even love you like I did before.'

Fine, I understand that.' Arnav said softly, feeling saddened because this was a result of his own doing and that their relationship would never be the same again.

"""""""""""

Khushi walked around the park for a short while. After two days extreme madness, she had finally felt a little relaxed after speaking to Dr Roy and her subsequent conversation with Arnav. She had been so foolish and so nave to have not thought through the abortion completely. That was her biggest weakness of character: She jumped into decisions quickly and also never stuck with them. Perhaps thats why people often took her for granted and the reason why her life and her relationships were all at a dead end.

Khushi sat on a bench in the park. She saw a few children playing in front of her. The youngest in the group was a toddler who was not more than three years old. While running around in the park, the toddler lost footing and fell on the ground. Khushi was very concerned and stood up to help the child. But she saw the mother approach the child and lift her in her arms. The mother then twirled the baby around to cheer her up. And when the baby's face broke into a toothy smile Khushi face broke into a smile automatically. Khushi looked on with longing as the mother and the baby walked away. And like it had always been the case with her life so far Khushi changed her decision once again.

She kept her hand on the tummy and whispered, I love you. I will always protect you. I'm sorry.'

She stood up and decided to meet Arnav to tell him that she wanted to keep the pregnancy. She would figure out the rest of the arrangement later with him. But once again her heart dared to dream of the happiness that would arrive in their lives in less than nine months.

""""""-

Just as Khushi was exiting the park, she saw Arnav approaching her.

I just received a call from the hospital. Dr Roy would like to see you. Its something about your blood test.'

What did they say? Is everything okay?' Khushi was concerned.

They didn't say much.' He then put his arm on her shoulder and said, Dont worry everything will be fine.'

He smiled at her reassuringly.

"""""""-

Once they were back at the hospital They met Dr. Roy outside her consulting room.

'Khushi are you sure you are 6 weeks pregnant?'

'Why doctor? Is everything alright?'

'Your HCG level, i.e, the pregnancy hormone count in the blood is far lesser than what it should be for six weeks. But don't worry about it. Sometimes the home pregnancy tests can be misleading with the gestation period.'

Khushi didn't feel convinced. She hadn't been with Arnav for a long time after the night of the henna due to his hectic work schedule and travel. So she was definite that she was six weeks pregnant.

Dr Roy then asked them to undergo the early-pregnancy scan and then meet her right after.

Khushi and Arnav walked into the sonography room for her scan. Once Khushi lay on the bed Arnav stood next to her and offered her his hand tentatively. Khushi didn't want to accept his hand. But truth to be told, she was feeling very worried after the meeting with Dr Roy. She could do with a bit of reassurance and if that is what Arnav was willing to offer, she would accept it. Khushi met his hand and he then entwined his fingers with hers as the scan began.

She looked at the screen with a worried expression wondering if everything was fine. The sonographer did not offer any advice when Khushi asked him questions pertaining to the pregnancy scan image. Arnav didn't know much about what was happening, but he decided just to focus on Khushi and support her.

After the scan Khushi had to wait to meet Dr Roy, so that the sonographer could pass his report along with the scan image. Those fifteen odd minutes were the slowest of her life as she waited anxiously to find out if everything was alright with the baby. She was praying fervently to the Gods to keep her child safe.

'Lets talk in my room Khushi.' Dr Roy came out to fetch them.

While they sat Khushi looked at Dr. Roy's face and she had a strong inkling that she was going to be delivered some bad news.

There is no better way of saying this. I have some bad news for both of you. Khushi has experienced a missed miscarriage.'

What does that mean?' Arnav asked as he was shocked to hear the word miscarriage.

It means Khushi's pregnancy sack is empty. There is no baby developing inside the sack. Sometimes the miscarried pregnancy stays within the body for a while before it gets discharged. Which is why Khushi has continued to experience early pregnancy symptoms.'

Does this mean that my baby is no more?' Khushi asked in a trembling voice.

Sadly yes. I'm so sorry for your loss.'

Khushi broke down in the room as Arnav reached her immediately and cradled her head and held it close to his chest.

Doctor are you sure about this? Can we repeat any of the tests to reconfirm?' Arnav couldn't believe that they went through so much only for it to be snatched away from them at the last minute.

The outcome will be the same Arnav. I'm sorry. I know this must be very difficult to take. I will give you both a few minutes.'

Dr Roy left the room to give the couple some much needed privacy. She walked to the vending machine at the other end of the floor to get herself some coffee. On days like this she hated her job. She had felt a sense of accomplishment after she had persuaded Arnav to change his mind in the morning. But when she found out that Khushi had a missed miscarriage, she felt like an idiot to make the couple go through both elation and desperation on the same day.

""""""""-

'Khushi I'm so sorry . I'm so sorry.' Arnav hugged her even closer as Khushi continued to cry without a break.

Why do you care? What does it mean to you anyways. It's just a foetus to you.' Khushi said in-between her sobs. She snapped at Arnav as that was the easiest thing to do at that moment.

Khushi this is difficult for me too. I may not have an emotional connect with the baby. But I have one with you. And I can't see you in so much distress. I promise things will be better.'

I think God is punishing me for even considering the option of killing my baby. My baby paid for my sins.'

'Shhh. Nothing like that. This is a medical event. There is nothing you could have done to protect or avoid the miscarriage. Don't be so harsh on yourself.'

'I just want to go home Arnav. Please take me away.'

Dr Roy walked in just then.

Doctor Khushi would like to leave.' Arnav announced. He wanted to take her to the warmth and security of her home, as quickly as possible.

Just a couple of more minutes Arnav. Since the miscarriage has not been discharged from her body she can either wait for it to come out naturally or have medicines to speed up the process. Which one would you prefer?

Please give us the medicines. I don't want her to experience this trauma for any longer .' Arnav said decisively.

Dr. Roy wrote a prescription and handed over to Arnav and asked him to bring Khushi in a week's time for a review with another gynaecologist in the hospital, a friend, as she would be on holiday.

'Im sorry Khushi. I hope we will meet again in the future in better circumstances. It is natural to feel upset, angry or depressed after a miscarriage. Please get in touch with me if you'd like to see a therapist. Dealing with a Miscarriage can be daunting. So don't stop yourself from seeking help if you feel you need it.'

Khushi thanked the doctor in between her tears and left for home with Arnav.

After picking the medicines from the hospital pharmacy Arnav and Khushi took a cab to her home. Khushi had been inconsolably through the cab ride.

After reaching home, Arnav gave her the pill with some water.

Do I really have to take this Arnav? What if that baby is still alive?

Arnav hugged her tightly. 'You know you have to Khushi. Please don't prolong the inevitable.'

Khushi popped the pill and went into her bedroom to lie down. She turned to one side as she hugged a pillow and continued crying. In a short while she was joined by Arnav who held her close from the back. He kept repeating a few lines to help console Khushi. Things will get better I promise.' I love you Khushi.' I'm sorry for everything that has happened.'

In a short while Khushi cried herself to an exhausted sleep.

"""""""

Khushi woke up a few hours laters feeling extremely uncomfortable. The room was dark which meant that they had been sleeping for a few good hours. She grabbed her phone and saw that the time was close to eight. Then she brought the phone's screen as a source of light to look around her.

She let out a loud sriek.

During the course of her nap she had begun to bleed profusely.

Khushi what happened?' Arnav woke up and asked. He had assumed that she had seen a bad dream.

Arnav... My baby. See here. My baby is gone...' Khushi was shaking as she spoke.

Arnav held her trying to make her stop from seeing it any longer. He closed her eyes with his palm.

Khushi please can you take a shower while I clean this place up. I dont want you to see this.'

Arnav my baby...' Khushi kept repeating the same words as she was losing her grip on sanity.

Arnav got up from the bed and lifted her and took her straight to the shower room. He discarded her clothes, and made her sit on the floor while the water from the shower washed away all remaining traces of blood. After making sure that she was safe, He went back into the bedroom and collected the sheets and wrapped them into a tight knot. He then put it in inside three bags and then called a friend who was a doctor to find out where such sheets could be disposed.

When he went back into the bedroom he saw big stains on the mattress. He took a big roll of napkin and tried to rub away the stain.

And in the midst of this, Arnav broke down and cried, cried for the baby that had been taken away from Khushi and him, for the dreams that had been snatched away prematurely.

xxx

To Baby A. You will always be in our hearts.

Would it be the same

If I saw you in heaven?

'Cause I know I don't belong

Here in heaven

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6t4Zs5Yq_k[/YOUTUBE]

Author's note- This chapter was the one of the first ones I had conceptualised when I started writing Chasing Dreams. It was emotional exhausting while I wrote it a few weeks ago and even more draining while edited it today. There will be another update this weekend, I cant promise when.

R😉

😉

Sorry NB, I read the first part only and you know the reason. But of the part I read I think its over for Arnav and khushi. Khushi is not able to trust or love Arnav in the same way.