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thank you so much my beautiful sauten!
Omg, my sexy boy is playing guitar for me! I'm blushing!☺️
Indi di you always manage to get the best shots of Barun. They should make you his official photographer or something!..she'd said she'd go away forever and he had no idea why it mattered. but it did. so much that he feared. asr was afraid to turn around and look at her place... what if he saw... a locked door. she's gone. he was not going to look, faraq nahin padta, but all he was aware of was that door, that house where he'd walked in with her in his arms, when he'd feared she was gone, when she'd held onto his lapel, when he'd had to steal a look at her through the window to make sure she was ok, she was alive, she was awake. and now he had to turn and see, every part of him wanted to see, he couldn't resist any longer, he turned. a locked door. he felt a rush of feelings he'd never known before. the billowing dupattas came from nowhere and reminded him of things, touching him, reaching out, bringing him murmurings and messages he didn't clearly understand. just a funny dry pain shot through him and he couldn't look away. episode 50, neatly designed, no gaps, no awkward breaks, and an unforgettable moment without a single word where we try to catch a feeling it is really difficult to name or explain in mere words. There was so much desperation in those days. Desperation to stay away.. desperation to meet.. desperation to ignore.. and such smart writing directing.. you bring it all back
i don't know why but this longing of arnav singh raizada, this fear that she's gone forever seems to be echoing in the layers of these post wedding days, even in swami, especially in certain moments of 228. as he looks at her, as he wants her, does he think she can never be really his ever? he had feared crazily that evening in the guest house, but she was safe. then came lucknow and her decison to go away forever... hamesha. but she did return. he started to understand those messages, those feelings... and again came a moment of losing her. lucknow is one thing, but how to win the one you love if she loves another? just thoughts, will be back to write about 228.episode 228
"what if i lost you?!" he had yelled frantically without paying any heed to where he was or who was listening that night. holding her face in his hands, he'd let out his desperate fear and that incalculable need for a girl who came from nowhere and changed his world forever.she had needed him to say as much to her, maybe she had no idea but this is how he said i love you, i can't live without you... maybe she needed the words then, so she had pushed him away and said, so what. Loved how you write this!⭐️ Khushi had wanted an explanantion on diwali.. wanted admittance when he brought the bangles.. in disarming innocence almost demanded he utter the word sorry.. words were important.. maybe gave her security from the every changing moods of the pal mein rakshas pal mein raj kumar..seething he had brought her back home, again going to pieces when her bangle broke an a shard lodged itself in her wrist.he couldn't afford to lose her. she had become vital to life. to living.while writing on 178, the "what if i lost you?" episode, i'd felt his desperation. life without khushi had already become impossible to imagine. a para from that take:"as though the whole story of love got told in that one violent, vehement, exclamation on a dark road. a plea in it, a declaration too. don't leave me ever, i can't live without you. this point on that part of the story will be told, there will be a "khushi" connecting heartbeats, a silent near death by a terrace treacherous, madness, mayhem, even hate... yet the journey will go inexorably to the subtext of "what if i lost you?"
don't ever leave me. main tumhare bina ji nahin paaoonga."and yet, he had stood there watching on that terrace as he had been held by another. a part of him had felt, this was it... he had indeed lost her.that feeling perhaps was separate from and more intense than any other feeling he'd had at that moment. i remember thinking, for a moment then he reminded me of his mother... dying inside the way she did when she realised her husband indeed had another lover. yes he was asr the brother watching catastrophic betrayal, but even more at one level he was the new, besotted, lover full of hope dying a terrifying death. In pink I never thought of this.. thank you for pointing this out..khushi was gone forever. he had lost her.funny thing about love though, it is not easy to erase from the heart. even if your lover is false, even if your lover is unfair, sometimes even if they murder, they main, they cheat on you. neither he nor she could snuff out that feeling, no matter how much they suffered. how do you say such knowledgeable things Indi di?228 continued from 227 on the theme of kkgsr trying out her new strategy to destroy him... kill him with expressed love. delightful acting by both sanaya and the red clad angry young hero.she laughed in green as he seethed in crimson, his whole family enjoyed a little leg pulling of the mighty one. he sounded utterly cute complaining to nani... look what she's calling me! what? swami! snigger snigger around the table.frankly, that was not at all asr, but barun managed to keep his asr despite the cutesy. i said "phew!"he charged off looking hot, managed to get a white shirt (yes yes yes) from akash who had arrived with yellow roses for one of the most embarrassing characters in ipk... he rushed off to wear his shoes, for once they were polished, wonderful.and she planned yet another little game. it was meant to be light and fun and irritate him further.that was all.when she held his chin without thinking and pulled him close, she had no idea what this might lead to.he looked up, taken by surprise, saw her leaning so close, then she made contact.forehead to forehead.complete contact of a powerful centre of energy, where the teeka sits... a potent symbol in hindu thought. the area between the eyebrows where we put our bindi, a little dot of colour, is also considered to be the sixth chakra, "ajna", the seat of concealed wisdom. the bindi represents the third eye... a mystical and highly esoteric idea of an invisible eye that has the power to perceive beyond what the eye can. and it sees things that ordinary sight is not able to. (information from the net, but most hindus have grown up hearing about this concept.)she dragged him to her this time. and leaning over him, and laid her forehead on his. their bodies touched, where the third eye resonates. a mytical element to this touching.as the moment caught them in its clasp and took them away from all that was here, she began to lift her head, while he stared at her as if seeing her for the first time. and in their inverted lines, profiles almost flowing into each other and fitting, another concept of opposite forces being interconnected and interdependent came to mind, the yin and the yang.but had there been not even a single mystical connotation, the moment and that touch were still profound. for an instanr, both became who they were before the terrace ever happened.a man and a woman who loved each other. who couldn't live without each other.a moment of intense awareness. all non essentials fell away.they stayed there, not moving, almost not breathing. ❤️ not breathingthen a single word escaped his lips, guttural, resonating with the longing that was in his eyes that day he thought she had left... and the passion of the explosive "what if i lost you?!""khushi." I feel like being NK and teasing you.. nai nai nanav mere bhai replaced with nai nai Indi di.. you just can't get enough of his khushi right?that was all he said.i felt his desire, his love, his melting into her, his call to her soul, his immersion in her, and his heartbeat... now inextricably connected with her name.she felt all of it too, she stayed there unable to react, to move, getting lost. then she pulled herself up, still disoriented, wanting him as much as he wanted her. and once more returned to the here and now and the game that must be played.all the fun and play that followed was engaging, but at the centre of the episode somehow was that one simple moment, its effect radiating out in ripples across the rest of the action.one more beautiful thing in that contact, that connection... the transference of colour, from him to her. this time it was a perfect bindi, red and vibrant, as though she had branded him and made him her own.as though she is colouring him somehow, helping him find his colour, feel it, wear it... lovers always influence each other, the best ones do it positively, taking each other to new levels of life and consciousness... again and again their colours will mingle. in the guest house, it had been a cut and blood red, later sindoor and later still a pot of blood from her on him that would not go... Just remembered.. he had also put the bindi on the mirror excited lover ready to confess.. before their dreams were brutally shattered.. Sanaya had looked sooo pretty in the reflection with the dashing Barun behind her..haldi on her dupatta, her being almost, he had rubbed. the future holds heady play of mehndi and haldi...intimate, sexual, sensual and even mystical this exchange of colour...he in the meantime skipped breakfast and lunch, not even gila gila pusta was consumed. funnily, even in reality too he looked a bit thin and drawn somehow, maybe this is around when ipk started telling on barun's health; but he didn't fail to have my dhadkane increase in that shot with the spider web like graph on him. i did notice too not one other guy working in ar is anywhere near good looking. ❤️ In your words.. Hayee
Things are getting impertinent for Arnav. Khushi's hegemony is literally deranging him. Usually he doesn't show his asperity to Khushi openly. But it's getting difficult to keep his temper under reign. When he descends down wearing a red shirt, the whole family starts to pull his leg. Mami quips, how he turns from black and white to Eastman color. I guess she meant extreme. Gosh mami and her English, so difficult to understand.
"Mano, shar ehi rang dekke bigar jati hai naa."
(the bull goes nut to see this color, right?)
Mama also doesn't miss a chance to mock him. khushi is a perfect bahu of ASR's family.
"If you wear that flowery shirt you would've looked better, but it also suits you, it matches with your anger."
She abrades his anger by her banter.
"shama kijiye swami. (plz forgive me swami)" She louts to him acquiescently, making him enraged more.
Dutiful wife is now serving breakfast to her swami. His anger pulsates more. He asks for Akash. But he went to get gifat for Babli. Mama adds "yellow roses". Payal is still ambiguous; who is this Babli, for whom her husband is so concern!
"bestest dost." Mami adds wryly.
But why she didn't attend the wedding.
"She didn't get leave", nani joins them in the breakfast.
It's time for nani to be flabbergasted to see Arnav in red shirt. She knows very well who made her vapid grandson resplendent.
Khushi simpers in coy and Arnav glares at her angrily. Nani wants him to eat Prasad as he wore red color shirt. His wife did a special pooja for his health.
"so much devotion, so much care."
Nani is enamored to see Khushi's love for Arnav. She got the perfect bahu for her grandson.
""nahi chahi mujhe. I don't want this. And tell her to stop what she is doing."
He is in pique. Khushi is feigning innocence; what she did! He tells everybody that since morning Khushi is calling him "swami". He also wants to say what other antics she is playing, but inhibits him. There is no point to say his family about Khushi's insanity. He knows that they are almost like Khushi and they will irritate him more.
And his anticipation is not wrong. All became startled and nani appreciates Khushi. Arnav retorts back, it's all backwas. but Khushi is not relenting the poor guy. The overdose of her love made him leave the table without having his breakfast. Khushi is smiling at her victory.
Pause: I'm so baffled to see Khushi's insensitivity. Doesn't she know that he is diabetic? It's not right for him to skip meal. In spite of the animosity between them khushi and Arnav both love each other. So Khushi at least shouldn't play with his meal. We gonna witness an extreme temerity of Khushi in the coming episode.
Akash is back with his yellow roses. He is also dumbfounded to see crimson Arnav . But Arnav is not in a mood to tell him the story. He just needs to borrow a shirt from him. khushi follows him,
listen swami."
Khushi has concocted to acerbate him more. Her veil is back. When she hears Arnav's footsteps, she puts tika on her forehead. Arnav storms in the room
"Apni kammez badal di swami, kiyu swami?"
(did you change the shirt swami, but why?)
Arnav doesn't answer her; he is tremulous in anger. Khushi is making his life hell. He starts to put on his shoes. Khushi comes to do madat (help).
"no koshish bhi maat karma."
(no, don't dare to try.)
He admonishes her angrily.
"as you wish"..she moves away in submission. But her intention is to put tika on his forehead.
She holds him and pulls him back, makes him lie down on the recliner. She leans over him and touches her forehead with his. As both of them stay in that position for a while, a microcosm of sensation inhabited by just the two of them. She lifts her head slowly and gazes down at him with her breaths ragged and his eyes alit with a soft glow. both are in impediment. A mixture of intrigue and apprehension is rife in them. The moment felt close, a vibrate of unfelt anticipation, a spark of impulse quavers as their breath coalesces. As their faces touches each other, a bevy sensation runs in both of their veins. His face is inscrutable as ever, but there is an undecipherable expression in his eyes. He gulps in an attempt to thwart a rising wave of emotions.
"khushi."
He utters Khushi with an aspirate. His yearning for her spurts out from his mouth in this monosyllable. She also feels the exhilaration at his close proximity. She moves away, as her eyes flicker and reflects her inner turmoil.
I was just putting tika."
She tries to aberate her emotion. He gazes at her assiduously for a while, but comes back to his angry state again. Khushi tells him to come early. She will make his manpasand karela.
aren't you coming, swami?'
Arnav is irascible and tells her to stop what she is doing, or he will. it's no avail to retaliate her. He just leaves in frustration wiping the tika.
Pause: I thought he will not wipe the tika, after all for the first time his wife put it on his forehead so lovingly. Anyway I shouldn't expect that much of sensitivity from cvs. Those days the cvs became bonkers.
Khushi exults, "so much anger, that what I wanted. And the next thing will make you angrier."
The Raizadas are getting prepared for welcoming Babli. Mami tells Payal to put extra raisin in kheer, as Babli loves raisin. Khushi calls AR office and tells not to serve food to Arnav. She has planned to torture him more. Nani asks her about the tuition class. As it is weekend she also gave the kids leave. Mami quips,
"what school do this kids go where children sits on the ground, where Khushi and Payal studied!"
Nani retaliates her, how cum she knows about such school? Did she also study there? She asks her what school she went. Nani is the perfect MIL for a shallow woman like mami. She never supported her disparagement towards Payal and Khushi.
Mami pretends that she forgot the name of her school. She tells about her wish for Akash. If he would've gone to boys and girls school, instead of boy's school, he would've fallen in love with a childhood sweater. He wouldn't go crazy for payal. Payal and Khushi both get upset to hear her banter. Akash mends her not sweater, but sweet heart. He smiles at Payal to assuage her. loved Akash's gesture.
The door bell rings, so babli has arrived. Akash tells Payal to stay there. mami, Akash and nani go to receive the precious guest. Babli and Akash seem shares a special bond. She was telling what he was doing without seeing. Finally when he opened the door, the chubby little guest is shown. All welcomes her cordially. Akash introduces Payal with Babli as his wife. Babli who was smiling at khushi and Payal, becomes gloomy when she came to know that Payal is Akash's wife. Payal seems relieved to see Akash's little friend. She doesn't know that this little girl is actually her rival. Khushi teases her smiling jiji.
"Choti si jaan dekh kaar tumhari jaan mei jaan agayena jiji."
(you got relived to see this little girl.)
Khushi hugs Babli and kissed her. But over mature Babli didn't like to be fondled like a kid. Khushi tries to make her understand that if anybody kisses an adult, she doesn't become a kid. Babli whispers to Akash's ear that Arnav got married too. Khushi says Babli that Akash talked about her a lot to Payal. Babli says Akash never talked to her about Payal. I loved how Payal gave Akash a cute angry glare. Mami as usual derides that there is nothing to talk about her, that's why he didn't tell.
"I wanted you to meet her and know her by yourself, that's why I didn't tell." Akash again retorts his mom deftly.
Khushi takes a leave and wishes to meet her later.
Everybody in the family are now busy with Babli, but Babli seems already feeling jealous to see Akash and Payal together. What a nasty delineation of an innocent kid! Akash says she is only 9 but talks so mature. Payal says Akash that they two have a great camaraderie.
Arnav is in the meeting showing his employees their company's success and growth chart on the projector. Hayee, the young entrepreneur is looking so delicious!. The staffs seem a bit distracted. Arnav wants to know, what.
He gets the matter to hear the tinkling sound of her payal.
"You are kidding me."
His handsome visage is marred by intense anger. Khushi intrudes in the meeting carrying a big Tiffin carrier.
"How late it is! Now go everybody and eat your lunch. Do your meeting later. And how this TV shuts off?"
She switches off the projector without caring it's importance. She is behaving so casually as if it's not an office, but her home.
"Look you become so thin!"
Arnav is flagrant in rage. Khushi is shutting everybody's laptop and making space to serve food for Arnav. Arnav grabs her hand and takes her aside.
"khushi what are you doing?"
"you didn't have your breakfast in the morning."
She starts to serve food. The staffs are feeling embarrassed. When Arnav again tells Khushi to stop this, khushi averts him and says that she already had her lunch, so she will not eat with him.
Akash and Babli are having good time talking about their old times and future plan. When Payal brings food for her she shows her attitude and leaves the room. Before leaving she whispers something in Akash's ear. Payal asks her what she said. She said that she only can call him Mr. A, but nobody else. The little girl seems infatuated to Akash and as a result she is not amicable to Payal. Akash says Payal that she can call him Mr. A in private. Good to see a loving husband and wife.
Arnav drags Khushi to his glass cabin. He charges her grimly, what she is doing. They see that all the office staffs are looking at them. Aranv moves Khushi from their sight and asks her again. Khushi again aberates to answer and tells him to have food.
"so what will you have, the gila gila pusta."
"not pusta, but pasta, yes I'll eat that. Now you take your food and leave." He says with gritted teeth.
Pause: Khushi doesn't know how to pronounce pasta or she did it intentionally to mock Arnav? if Payal can write thank you speech in English, then how come Khushi can't pronounce a simple English word? This type of loop is so irritatimg to watch.
Khushi retorts him, her home made food is much nutritious.
"jaoo"
He is flagrant in rage. Remnant of his earlier anger still simmers in his eyes. He doesn't want to listen any more. Khushi thinks, he is getting angry, cause he is hungry. If he eats then he will feel better. She calls him swami to embitter him more.
"I'm angry cause you are here." Arnav tells her to leave with her food immediately.
"as you wish."..khushi says meekly.
The submissive wife leaves, but smile mischievously. She seems become stoic at his haughtiness, cause her mission to irritate Arnav is getting successful.
When Khushi was leaving, one of AR's employees comes to her and asks about jalebi. She tells him to send it for him tomorrow. Khushi bhabi is already established her entity in her husband's office.
"Yeh hadse zada pyaar, nishchit karege uska haar."
(this over dose of love will make sure of his defeat.)
She is exulting, but feeling bad that swami didn't have his food. But she will feed him something else.
"I'll feed you the dinner for sure. Khoob sara pyaar, khali na jaye ASR ki waar"
She has to endeavor to defeat ASR in this game.
ASR is back in his meeting. His staffs remind him, of his lunch? But he looks repulsive and prevaricates to answer.
[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=cm9fAH4hfzI[/YOUTUBE]
credit goes to the maker
plz ignore typos.
gifs credit goes to tumblr.
Originally posted by: ArshiHamesha
Khushi's denial VS Anjali's denial ...nicely described Horizon
BUT fearing of God is different...How I perceive religion and fear of God is totally different no matter what religion.
Prayer to God and all these is pure IN BETWEEN GOD AND HIS MAN ...you are responsible directly to God for your actions and the way you pray for him in this regard.
For me FEAR OF GOD IS IN YOUR HEART AND MIND embedded in such a way that even you think bad , you stop right away with that fear, for example when you get jealous of some one, think WHY? What for? IS this worth for increasing one more sin? etc...and you stop further with that...but if that FEAR is not strong then you don't even feel it and will do as anormal habit of yours like Shyam, who had no fear and Anjali who had fear but not STRONG one...She is thinking , if she will do all these Poojas , she will be granted with all and will be away from trouble and when trouble comes , she BLAMES...that blaming is something.Instead of facing it she was blaming the very same person Khushi who she was thinking is totally RIGHT for her Brother.
Sohara, Beautiful.. beautiful...the shayari on the top, the gifs.. edits and your words accompanying!a microcosm of sensation inhabited by just the two of them.You just reached the crux with that above!
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