some cool meanings

hey guys check out these cool meanings😆 srry if posted b4

Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with a fire at one end & a fool at the other. Marriage: Its an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a women gains her master. Divorce: Future tense of divorce. Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through " the minds of either ". Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present. Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he gt the biggest piece. Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power. Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on. Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before. Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight. Office: A place where you can relax after your stressful home life. Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth. Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. Experience: The name given by men to their mistakes. Atom Bomb: An invention toend all inventions. Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip. Optimist: A person who while falling from the Eiffel Tower says in midway "See, I am not injured yet". Miser: A person who lives poor to die young. Father: A banker provided by nature. Criminal: A guy no different from the rest….except that he got caught. Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
1. Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.