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guenhwyvar

@guenhwyvar

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#891

Originally posted by: -Shruti
⭐️Kunti may go to Drona with the same request. 😆

Inspired by Shruti~

Me: wouldn't that be extremely awkward though

--and we drift back into time ... la di da di da... --

K: Hey person I'm not really related to except by the fact that you tutored my 5 kids, I have to tell you a secret..."

D: Kaho Devi"

K: Yeah I have a sixth kid, which is actually my first kid. His name is Karna."

D: Ang Raj Karna?"

K: Yep. So I am facing this dilemma since Karna is on one side and Arjun is on the other side and they are sworn enemies"

D: So what do you want me to do?

K: Protect both of them

D: You do know that I am the general of the Kaurava army

K: yes..

D: So asking me to protect Arjun is kind of silly, especially since I'm his teacher.

K: Bhishma listened to me.

D: Yeah well I'm not Bhishma

K: I know that

D: So ...

K: So ...

D: So ...

K: So you'll do it, great thanks Dronaji

D: Wait no. I will not protect neither

K: You don't have to physically protect both, just do something so that they will never face each other.

D: Why not just tell your sons this secret

K: Well ... they would lose the war then since Yuddhi will order everyone to not attack Karna.

D: Ok. why not tell Karna

K: Oh I already did that. He promised me a few things like he won't kill any of my other sons except Arjun. Basically, the ultimate battle will be between Karna and Arjun, so that's why I came to you and Bhishma.

D: Who do you want to see victorious?

K: I'm a mother - I want to see both victorious

D: That's not going to be possible,

K: Right, it's not possible for me.

D: No. It's not possible at all.

K: But come on Drona ... we go waay back. Remember you are the teacher of my kids.

D: Ok. What do you want me to do?

K: I don't know ... maybe kick Karna off your team

D: you do realize that with Bhishma gone, Karna is the only warrior that can come close to matching Bhishma's skills.

K: Well yeah...

D: You do realize that by allowing Arjun to fight and Karna to not fight, you are being incredibly unfair to Karna

K: well yeah .. but

D: You do realize that if Karna found out that you were behind the reason why he cannot partake in the war even after giving you the promises he will loathe you.

K: Well noo...

D: You do realize that he will never trust you

K: Well noo...

D: well then ...

K: So just to confirm - you're not going to kick Karna off your team.

D: For gods' sake woman, that's pure stupidity

K: So you're calling Bhishma stupid?

D: No ...

K: But you just said ...

D: Aargh shut up already!

K: Come on Drona. If you release karna on the battlefield, his target might even be your friend Drupad!

D: Drupad is no longer my friend. He didn't greet me or sit next to me during the rules meeting.

K: Oh shoot. But whyy??

D: LIsten that's my personal business. Besides, it's late at night, we're by the beach, and we're alone. What will people say??

K: Well I didn't choose this location

D: Just what are you insinuating.

K: Look, listen. Let's start from the beginning ok.

D: *rolls eyes* ok

K: Hey old buddy, old friendy, old pal *punches shoulders*

D: oww

K: What do you say - just help me out wouldya

D: No.

K: Come on

D: No

K: Please

D: NO
K: Pretty Please

D: No

K: With Cherries on Top?

D: Nope

K: Aww what's it gonna take ya old fart!!

D: smooth. That'll change my mind.

K: Come on .. just till the end of the war...

D: Your sons are plotting my death

K: So what ... the only way you can die is if they lay down your weapons. Here,if you promise to let Karna off the team, then I'll tell you a secret.

D: I know that they are planning to tell a lie to me about the death of my son to make me drop my weapons so Dhristi can kill me.

K: oh ... how do you know that?

D: It's the only way to defeat me.

K: ahh-ha I found the way to defeat you. Tell me you will protect Karna and Arjun or else I will reveal the secret to my sons!!

D: It's kind of obvious actually.

K: Come on...

D: Stop being so whinny!
K: But ...

D: look lady. No means no. If you can't understand that, too bad. I have sworn loyalty to the King, I cannot betray him by keeping the best warrior we have off the battlefield.

K: BUt you'll be doing a good thing

D: Do you trust Arjun

K: yeah

D: Do you trust Karna

K: yeah

D: No you have to pick one.

K: What?
D: like you can only trust one.

K: But i trust them both, I'm their mother!!
D: No but..

K: Are you telling me that I can't trust both my kids Mr. Drona-Acarya. I think it's rude of you to think like that. If you had another kid, Ashwatthama II, would you pick between Ashwatthama and Ashwatthama II. No. Would you ask your wife Kripi to do so, no. So why are you telling me to do something that you yourself can't do you napunsak!!!

D: That was uncalled for.

K: So just keep him off the battlefield ok. Is that so much to ask.

D: Gosh .. ok whatever.

K: Promise me.

D: Yeah sure whatever

K: PINKY PROMISE ME!!

D: That would involve us touching each other.

K: Mind PINKY PROMISE ME then

D: whatever.

The next morning:

P (priyamvada): Sakhi Sakhi! Ang Raj Karna is on the battlefield ready to fight

K: Fork!! That b***h Drona tricked me. He even mind pinky promised me.

P:Maybe now is a good time to tell Duryodhan and Shakuni and his brothers and Ashwatthama and Shalya and all the allies on the Kauravas the truth.

K: You're right.

*Kunti digs up a wooden stick about a little less than a foot long and points it at her throat*
K: Sonorous (Harry potter spell reference)

Her voice becomes loud and she steps outside and yells

K: DRONA IS A BIG FAT NAPUNSAK. HE WILL DIE WHEN HE HEARS THE LIE THAT HIS SON IS DEAD BECAUSE HE WILL DROP HIS WEAPONS. DHRISTI PUTRA, THIS IS THE TIME TO KILL THAT SON OF A LYING BI**H

P: Rajmata!! how do you know this?

K: *still booming voice* THAT LIAR TOLD ME HIMSELF LAST NIGHT BY THE BEACH WHEN WE WERE ALONE

In the battlefield:
D: Uhh ... what??

Dury: That's your death secret ... wow ... that's stupid. The greatest warrior, the one who is undefeatable, the best archer in the world, our teacher ... his death comes from a stupid frickin' lie!! Well ... Karna. You're the next commander. God knows how long this idiot is going to last ... blurting out his death secrets.

Ashwi: Don't speak about my father like that.

Dury: Oh shut up you stupid son of a napunsak... biggest mistake of my life was staking you. Now I'm stuck with this big mouth.

on the other side:

Arjun: Shit ... there goes our plan.

Yuddhi: Women have big mouths and can't keep secrets. I henceforth curse them that they will never be able to keep a secret.

Sahadev: Isn't that moot though... we didn't want mom to reveal the plan

Yuddhi: Shhh

Nakul; I wonder what he and mother were doing alone at night by the beach

Panchaali appears out of nowhere: SHUT UP YOU SICKO. *slaps him on the back of his head*

*To yuddhi* what's this curse I hear about women not being able to keep a secret! I disagree with this curse.

Y: Well it doesn't affect you sweetums

B: Hey Jyesth!! It's my year with Panchaali, only I can call her sweet names. Isn't that right my golgappa. My laddo. My gulab jamun.

Panchaali: *giggle*

A: So what you are doing here Panchaali?

P: Well I heard matashri screaming so ...

A: well you kind of have to get off. the sun is about to rise and I don't want

Pandavas: *cough* we *cough*

A: *grumbles* WE don't want you to get hurt.

P: Ok. Bye. Good luck! *blows kisses*

Edited by shyam09 - 11 years ago

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Diala D

@...Diala...

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#892

Shyam Good one 😆 Cute Mind Pinky Promise 😆

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Vrish

@Vr15h

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 11 years ago

#893

Shyam

This was my favorite part 😆

D: So ...

K: So ...

D: So ...

Followed by

K: Look, listen. Let's start from the beginning ok.

D: *rolls eyes* ok

K: Hey old buddy, old friendy, old pal *punches shoulders*

D: oww

K: What do you say - just help me out wouldya

D: No.

K: Come on

D: No

K: Please

D: NO
K: Pretty Please

D: No

K: With Cherries on Top?

D: Nope

K: Aww what's it gonna take ya old fart!!

D: smooth. That'll change my mind.

Edited by .Vrish. - 11 years ago

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969348

Hibernated

Posted: 11 years ago

#894

@Shyam,

Nice one 👏

Kunti sure knows the way of getting things done. The sonorus thing made me 🤣

You made Draupadi slap Nakul (Poor thing loses point in Patiyogita 😆)

Yudi trying to win points and Bheem, oh laddo !! 😆😆

BTW, I am yet to read so many stories here. Missed so many from a last few pages. Will catch up soon.

Quote

Vrish

@Vr15h

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 11 years ago

#895

Finally, the night after Drona's death, when the last obstacle to Karna leading the army is gone, Duryodhan is having a war council when Kunti barges in.

D: Kunti, we are having a war meeting. How dare you come in here

K: First of all, it's 'Mata Kunti' to you. But given how you behaved w/ Draupadi, I shouldn't be surprised.

D: Well, who's stopping you from joining your sons? I wouldn't be too proud of my maryada if I were you. Anyway, why are you here?

K: I came to suggest you a new senapati for your army. Don't be foolish & make it Karna.

D: One, why do you care, when it's Bhima's victory that you want, and two, what do you know about warfare?

K: What I've heard. Today, when your gurudev was killed, where was Karna, & what was he doing? Just fighting some unnamed Panchalas somewhere or the other - not even Arjun. Who he can't even harm any more, thanks to my beloved pautr Ghatotkacha (weeps)

D: Rajmata Kunti, all of us were shocked, so I don't blame him for being inactive.

K: Yeah, but after your Gurudev was killed, whose day was it today? Ashwatthama's!

D: Yeah, he did do quite some damage w/ the Narayanastra. But he couldn't defeat Arjun in the end

K: He has a much better chance against Arjun than Karna does. He has the Brahmashira.

D: So does Karna

K: Yeah, but Karna has a curse that he won't remember. Ashwatthama has no such curse.

D: Rajmata, Ashwi is dear to me, but I'm unconvinced about him - he failed to defeat Arjun today

K: Then make Kripacharya, your kulguru, the senapati. He is third only to Bheeshma & Drona.

D: No!!! Not Kripa, not Ashwi. Karna it is. Every day until now, I've had senapatis who were partial to the Pandavas. Now, w/ Karna, this will all end.

K: But he'll be useless to you - I've extracted from him a promise that he won't kill YBNS.

D: That's fine - I can kill them, even Bhima. I just need Karna to kill Arjun. So Karna it is.

Kunti left the room, weeping profusely!

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Cotswolds

@Cotswolds

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#896

Originally posted by: .Vrish.
Finally, the night after Drona's death, when the last obstacle to Karna leading the army is gone, Duryodhan is having a war council when Kunti barges in.

D: Kunti, we are having a war meeting. How dare you come in here

K: First of all, it's 'Mata Kunti' to you. But given how you behaved w/ Draupadi, I shouldn't be surprised.

D: Well, who's stopping you from joining your sons? I wouldn't be too proud of my maryada if I were you. Anyway, why are you here?

K: I came to suggest you a new senapati for your army. Don't be foolish & make it Karna.

D: One, why do you care, when it's Bhima's victory that you want, and two, what do you know about warfare?

K: What I've heard. Today, when your gurudev was killed, where was Karna, & what was he doing? Just fighting some unnamed Panchalas somewhere or the other - not even Arjun. Who he can't even harm any more, thanks to my beloved pautr Ghatotkacha (weeps)

D: Rajmata Kunti, all of us were shocked, so I don't blame him for being inactive.

K: Yeah, but after your Gurudev was killed, whose day was it today? Ashwatthama's!

D: Yeah, he did do quite some damage w/ the Narayanastra. But he couldn't defeat Arjun in the end

K: He has a much better chance against Arjun than Karna does. He has the Brahmashira.

D: So does Karna

K: Yeah, but Karna has a curse that he won't remember. Ashwatthama has no such curse.

D: Rajmata, Ashwi is dear to me, but I'm unconvinced about him - he failed to defeat Arjun today

K: Then make Kripacharya, your kulguru, the senapati. He is third only to Bheeshma & Drona.

D: No!!! Not Kripa, not Ashwi. Karna it is. Every day until now, I've had senapatis who were partial to the Pandavas. Now, w/ Karna, this will all end.

K: But he'll be useless to you - I've extracted from him a promise that he won't kill YBNS.

D: That's fine - I can kill them, even Bhima. I just need Karna to kill Arjun. So Karna it is.

Kunti left the room, weeping profusely!

So Kunti gets amply humiliated and weeps as well.. 😆
But this is great one.. You are certainly giving some good ideas to CVs. The way everyone almost knows that Karna is her son.. it will be hardly surprising if she blurts it out to Dury as well..
I am sure all Karnalis will be proud of Dury's faith in Karna.. 😆👏

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969348

Hibernated

Posted: 11 years ago

#897

Originally posted by: .Vrish.

K: What I've heard. Today, when your gurudev was killed, where was Karna, & what was he doing? Just fighting some unnamed Panchalas somewhere or the other - not even Arjun. Who he can't even harm any more, thanks to my beloved pautr Ghatotkacha (weeps)

K: But he'll be useless to you - I've extracted from him a promise that he won't kill YBNS.

D: That's fine - I can kill them, even Bhima. I just need Karna to kill Arjun. So Karna it is.

Kunti left the room, weeping profusely!

I just can't help notice how you make Kunti get insulted and weep so much 😆😆

Will not be surprised to see her go and beg Karna to stay out of war before he accepts to be the Senapati

Edited by Archana.nac - 11 years ago

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guenhwyvar

@guenhwyvar

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#898

Posted this in the Feedback thread:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's like having a tea party each time they meet:

Warrior on P side (P): Hello warrior on K side.

Warrior on K side (K): Hello warrior on P side.

P: How are you doing?

K: I'm doing fine, thank you for asking. How about yourself?
P: Well the war has gotten me all frenzy but I miss you so much, so I come to the battlefield.

K: Ah yes, it's a shame because of the rules and curfew. As much as I want to come visit you after the day's war has ended, we cannot break the rules since this will symbolize breaking dharma.

P: So how about some tea then, you know before we get on with the action. We might as well make the best use of the time, you know...

K: I guess so.

P: (claps hands twice) -- you senik.

(senik is busy fighting)

P: (claps hands twice again) -- hey you senik that's fighting...

S: What it is sir. I'm (breathes) fighting.

P: My friend here and I are having some tea. Bring a table and a chair now.

S: That's too far away.

P: Are you denying me?

S: No .. ahhh! (close call as he almost got stabbed). But it's impossible for me.

P: You are useless. How dare you deny my friend and I some tea time.

S: No offense, but shouldn't you be fighting.

P: Useless fellow.

K: Now now, calm down mitra. It will all be ok. Here come aboard my chariot. We can sit and chat and have tea.

P: That works.. it would have been nicer on the ground, but (shoots dirty look at senik who has now been stabbed and fallen to the floor). Good riddance.

(P picks up what looks like a briefcase and casually walks over to K. Any soldier who tries to attack P was killed by K's arrows).

P: ooh. good shot mitra.

K: well I'm no Arjun. Tee Hee Hee.

P: Tee Hee Hee.

P: (opens briefcase to show his portable tea set.)

P: Oh dear. I don't have any more tea packets on me. Damn.

K: Oh .. hmmm.

P: Let's pretend to have imaginary tea.

K: Sure that works!

P: (hands a tea cup to K and pretends to pour water from the kettle)

K: Oh woah. Very hot water huh.

P: (smiles) How many teaspoons of sugar would you like?

K: Mm. How about 3 teaspoons.

P: (nods, adds 3 teaspoons of imaginary sugar) 1, 2, 3.

K: Now let me serve you dear friend.

P: If you insist.

K: Here you go. (hands a tea cup to K and pretends to pour water from the kettle)

P: Phew! You were right. This water is hot!!

K: (smiles) How many teaspoons of sugar?

P: I like 2 teaspoons

K: (nods, adds 2 teaspoons of imaginary sugar) 1, 2.

P&K: cheers (both lighting clink the edges of their teacups).

K: mmm P, this tea is fascinating.

P: you're right K! The taste is simply fabulous

K: you know P. I honestly don't want to fight you.

P: You know, I think the same thing.

K: Are there any memories you can think of that can aid me in giving a reason why I should raise my arms against you. I fear my hands won't stay steady when aimed at you.

P: Only if you can think of one for me.

K: Hmmm.

P: Hmmm.

K's Charioteer (KC): I have one your highness.

K: Ahh KC. Excellent. Tell me.

P: (whispers) K, he was listening to our conversations.

K: (whispers) No don't worry about KC. He's very trustworthy and reliable.

(normal voice) ok KC tell me what you are thinking of

KC: Well how about the fact that you are both warriors on different sides. You are partial, thus you have to fight.

K: Well ... what a useless fellow.

KC: (mouths) wow ...

P: What an idiot charioteer you have.

K: Tell me about it. The other day, I was barely saved because this idiot decides to make a left turn instead of right, leading me towards Bhishma rather than the Pandava army!!

P: What!!! what a fool.

K: I know. It was thanks to my brains that kept me away from Bhishma. I had to jump off my chariot and leap onto another chariot. This idiot was going to make it look like I was retreating or something.

KC (mouths): You told me to do that!!

P: What a useless garbage. Here is my friend's address. Send him a message, he will definitely come and be your charioteer. Much more reliable.

K: (sips last drop of tea) Ahh this tea was fabulous.

P: I told you so!

K: Let's do this again sometime huh

P: How about tomorrow, same time?

K: (Looks up at the sky) Hmm when the sun is slightly more west than mid-day. that works. Fantastic time to take a tea break.

P: Should we meet here then?

K: Excellent suggestion.

P: Hmm ... so should we go back to fighting then?

K: Honestly, I don't think so. My doctor recommends that we shouldn't fight after having a meal.

P: Nice thought. You saved me again!

K: Let's rest here for 30 minutes.

P: Awesome idea.

(they go to sleep)

Another P: What is P doing with K sleeping together?

30 minutes later

P: *YAWNNN* That was a good rest!!

K: My energy is coming back. Let's fight now!

P: You know, I'm still a bit tired. I should walk this off. Can you keep an eye out for me while I walk back?
K: Definitely!

P: (walks back to his chariot, while K shoots anyone who attacks P)

K: Ready mitra.

P: Ready mitra!

K: Before we start ... I just want to say I'm sorry if I hurt you! I'll try not to hurt you

P: Me too!! I'll try not to hurt you either~ for the sake of our tea party tomorrow

K: (blows conch)

P: (blows conch)

A distance away, the commander of both armies notice K and P blowing their conchs. They both think that a maha-yuddh will take place... but boy were they wrong...

Edited by shyam09 - 11 years ago

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Cotswolds

@Cotswolds

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#899

Nice one Shyam09. Its funny that we both wrote OS on same topic at same time.. 😆

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Vrish

@Vr15h

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 11 years ago

#900

Krishna, Dhrishtadyumna and the rest of the Pandavas are strategizing on how to fight the next day's battles. Krishna, a big fan of deceit, puts forward his proposal.

K: We need to really separate Bheeshma, Drona, Ashwatthama and all major warriors of the Kauravas, and individually hunt them down.

D: That sounds good in theory, but which vyuhas should I used to achieve that? A Nakshatra vyuha, where each of the warriors would be on spokes of a star?

A: Getting them into that formation would be next to impossible

K: That's why we need to cheat in order to pull this off.

Y: I'm not going to authorize cheating

K: But you have to, in order to advance dharam. Besides, it's the senapati here who gives orders

D: As you desire, Vasudev. But what do you suggest?

K: First of all, send a warrior to Hastinapur to assassinate king Dhritarashtra. That will force Bheeshma to leave the Kaurava army.

D: Okay, but who should do that?

K: Maharaj Drupada

MD: I'd be more than happy to do that to the king who insulted my daughter. Bhima has vowed to kill his sons, Arjun Karna, Nakul Shalya & Sahadev Shakuni. Nothing's left for me. Let me put that blind coward to the sword.

V: Good idea, Maharaj Drupada. That way, Bheeshma will go after you. So how do we ensure that your attempt is successful?

S: Brata Arjun should block Bheeshma and prevent him from going ahead.

D: Okay, but that still leaves Drona. I can block him...

B: You can't block him alone. Have Yudisthir fighting alongside you, as a bait for him

D: Okay. But Ashwatthama still remains...

N: I'll take care of him

S: I'll handle Shalya, and once done w/ him, Shakuni.

B: So that leaves Virata, Abhimanyu and me. I'll take on Duryodhan, while Virata & Abhimanyu can block any other Kauravas who try to go to Dhritarashtra's aid.

K: Once this plan works, Dhritarashtra, Duryodhan, Dushashan & all the kauravas are dead, and we can then take over Hastinapur. Bheeshma, Drona, Ashwatthama all would then have to serve you.

A: That does leave a problem. I can barely block pitamaha, but what if Dhrishtadyumna & Yudisthir fail to stop Drona?

K: Then there is one more chal that I'll do.

B: What's that?

K: I'll join in the war as a combatant, and take over as senapati.

Everybody in the Pandava camp is ecstatic at this news

Edited by .Vrish. - 11 years ago

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