<font size="5">HER INSECURITIES</font>
MANIK POVIts late night , I think mom already dropped Nandini in our room because I was discussing business in our town office and its already late. I am afraid, I let her wait for me. No one is around it means servants already left and Mom too is in her room.
I tiptoee towards my room didn't want to wake or disturb anyone. I slowly stepped near my door and pushed it slightly making sure it won't make any noise.
My eyes first striked on our empty bed which was just front of the door. I frowned finding our bed empty because its too late where she must be. I panicking rushed to our bathroom but it was also empty and I felt myself lac of breath.
Where she could be..???
Did she left me...??
No..no..!!!!
I roamed my eyes every where in our room but found her nowhere. I saw the glass door of our balcony side ajar so I quickly rushed there and then my eyes fallen on the couch in the corner near the glass doors and I got my breath back. She was sleeping soundly curled up like a ball in fury black banket. I felt my self drowning in her calm posture but still her forhead has frown lines.
But why she is sleeping here on couch!!!
I stepped closer and kneeled beside her couch in attempt to wake up I putted my hands on her forhead caressing it lightly but I stopped myself I didn't want to wake up she looks beautiful when she is asleep. I with a goofy smile started to caressed her hairs but then again thought knocked me I can't let her sleep here it will be cold here and most importantly I can't bear her sleeping here every day.
"Nandini!!..Nandini..!!" I softly called her name caressing her hairs and she stirred in sleep and slowly opened her eyes but when she noticed me she snapped awake getting up.
"Aap??" She frowned in shock.
"Hey!!!relax.. why are you here..??" I asked softly cupping her face and she gaped at me like a baby..again..!!!
"Slee..sleeping here.."she replied nervously.
"But why..you should sleep on bed not here.."I told her.
"But that..that's yours.." she replied looking at me innocently and I rolled my eyes.
"Nandini!!are you crazy.. nothing is mine and yours.. ITS OUR.. and I mean it...ok???"I told her softly but she keep on staring me.
"But this.. you.. "she paused "I am thankful that you saved..saved our family reputation and its a huge favor and I think I can never repay it but please I don't want to cause you any more troubles.."she stated nervously looking down stammering on some part and I gaped at her with creased brows.
What she meant???
"Hey!!"I softly nudged her chin up to look at her eyes directly " why you are calling it a favor and what troubles you couse me??"I asked not understandingher point.
"Ofcourse I am trouble to you. I mean look at you and me. We both are utterly different from different world. Our match is just out of question. I mean the way we married you are a billionaire for god sake and and just because of me you are going to bear criticism duniya aap ka mazaak banaegi sirf meri wajah se. You have a different caliber people love you adore you or mainjo khud apni shadik din dhokha kha k baithi hu. To main trouble nahi to or kya hu."she sobbed while blurting out her turmoil and I was staring her suprised.
This was going through inside her..
She was suffering this much...
She was feeling insecure...
"Nandini!!" I took her name sternly holding her hand"this is the first and last time I am going to clear this out."I paused "I never married you for a favor because I am not saint who take someone's else problem on my head. I married you because I wanted to. I dreamt of you from the day one I first saw you in cafe and I never wanted to think you all this as a favor and if you are talking about criticism and bitching. I don't care. I bloody dont give a damn until you are happy and with me. Jab to nahi thi tabhi duniya hamare bare me bate krti thi or abhi bhi krti hai kyunki unka kaam hai bate banana hmunki wajah se jeena to nahi chod sakte apni khushiya to nahi chor sakte.to islie unhe hamare bare me jo bolna hai bole we won't care. Aur tumhe pate hai hamari shadi.k time I took a vow k chahe kuch ho jae tumse pehle sari musibat ka samna main karunga. I don't know about you but I really want to give our marriage a chance. I want to live a happy married life so I insist tumbhi ise ek chance do or ar tum nahi nibha paogi to don't worry is shadi me main itne effort dalunga k ye hm dono k lie successful ho jaegi.. samjhi." I explained her and she stared at me with a disbelieving look.
"Bolo!!dogi na chance..???"I asked softly scaring of her answer.
"I need time...but I will try.."she audibly whispered after a pause filling my heart with warmth and relief.
I smiled"now shall we sleep??"I asked pulling her with me and she nodded but suddenly halted at her step. "What??"'i frowned.
"You will sleep on couch then??"she asked looking confused and guilty and my heart skipped a beat on her innocence.
"No" " no onesleep on couch. We both will slerp on bed it huge enough and I.already told u nothing is yours and mine its our. So we both share everything the way we decided to give it a chance and start afresh."I paused looking at her feared face "and I promise I won't cross my limits and give you your needed time until you want...is it okk??" And she hesitantly nodded.
I made her sleep on other side of bed before covering her with sheets and decided to left the room so she can sleep without any awkwardness which my presence beside her can cause her.
I slightly closed the door making sure not to disturb her and headed towards my mom's rom to sort the matter out.
***
"Knock!!..knock!!.."
I knocked the door before pushing it and found my mom sitting on bed reading some magazine completely engrossed in it.
"Mom!!"I.softly called her she titled her head up from magazine to look at me but again turned her attention in magazine not showing her interest in my presence which hurted me but I closed the door behind me and gathering courage reached to her bed and sat beside her.
She sighed audibly before keeping magazine back on side table and looked at me.
"What do you want??" She asked curtly.
"Mom!! I want to talk to you" ireplied softly offeneded by her response.
"And what is still left to talk..??" She snapped aggressively.
"Mom!!! I am sorry. Please forgive me now na. I know I did a huge mistake but still you can't be angry with me for that long."
"First..its not a mistake its a sin what you did and second I am not angry on you I am angry on my self on my parenting. I don't know meri parwarish me kaha kami reh gai jo tum itna gir gae Manik."she spited acidly
"Mom!!your parenting was perfect. You are a perfect mother. So stop blaming yourself. Its me who hurted you and I am really sorry for that..please"i pleaded again with pain laced voice.
"To kise blame karu. Tumhe?? Kyu kia Manik tum ne esa. Tumhe pata hai main jb bhi Nandini ko dekhti ho muje kitni taqleef hoti hai. Mujse galti ho gai tumhe manglore sath le jake."she blurted angrily.
"Mom!!please. That was fate. Na aap galt ho na main. That was love and everything is fair in love and war or maine jo kia that was fair. Aap hi socho jab main ek formal shirt purchase krne k lie atleast 50 designers ko pareshaan krta ho to main apni life ka itna bada faisla ek finger snap me kese le sakta hu but maine lia because that was already planned by destiny. Mera or Nandini ka milna ese hi likha tha. Jise koi chah k bhi change nahi krpaya. So please forgive me. Ap jo kahogi main vo karunga bs muje maaf krdo. Main aap ki ye be rukhi nahi dekh sakta mom..please..or ye esa bhi nahi hai k main Nandini ko khush nahi rakhunga main use bht khush rakhunga I promise. So please ek galti k lie stop dragging the matter."I begged and a tear escaped from my eyes.
"REALLY??so that was all fate right. Thik hai I will forgive u on only one condition" mom asked all calmed and cool.
"You just say main sb maunga.." I encouraged her.
"Jake Nandini ko sb sach sach bata do, ofcourse ye tumhare lie choti baat hai haina. Agar Nandini me tumhe maf krdia or tumhe accept krlia then I promise main tumhe khushi khushi maaf kr dungi..bolo??" Mom suggested her condition in a business tone and I gaped at her shock and disbelief.
"Mom!!"I whispered.
"Kyu?? Nahi haina himmat. Darte hona k vo tumhe chor k isi waqt chali jaegi. Jab tumhare ander inta bada dar hai to tum ise choti baat kese keh sakte ho. Main tumhe usi din accept karungi jis din tum Nandini ko sach bataoge."she stated in a full and final tone.
"Mom!!please no.. you can't do this to me." I begged crying infront of her.
"And you can't do this to HER!!"she snapped furiously.
I quitely get up from the floor looking broken and with a slow pace started to leave the room and turned ro take the last glance of my mom which was watching me but when I turned she quickly slided under cover facing her back to me and I closed the door soundly behind me and headed towards terrace with thousands of thoughts.
I am standing on terrace gaping the night peaceful sky in search of some answer tears are continuously flowing down realising my mom will never forgive me for what I did to Nandini.
Am I really a bad son??
Am I really a bad lover??
Who destroyed his beloved happiness??
Am I really a selfish man who never think about anyone before himself.
Am I that bad to love someone???
Or to be someone's love???
Am I not rightful to fight for my love that world is now despising me..??
I tiredly kneeled down on floor ruffling my hairs in frustration and pain I know the step I took was wrong I almost destroyed Aryaman's character, I hurted Nandini and my family unintentionally in all these. But I didn't have any other option. I was clueless. Every moment I saw aryaman and Nandini together I felt my self loosing as if I am losing my life every passing minutes. Someone is slowly taking my life away from me. I was dying every f**king moment. And no one was there to help me. I was alone fighting for my love no one supported me so I did what I felt right at the moment because I can't live without her.
My step was wrong!!!
My way was wrong!!!
HELLL!!! I was wrong..!!!
But my LOVE wasn't wrong..!!!!
No one was with me then no one tried to understand me then and look no one is with me now and no one understand me even NOW.
SO GUYSS!!!HERE NEW UPDATE !!! AND YES I HAVE WROTE A NEW STORY ON WATTPAD [Desolate Sequin-HER SHINING KNIGHT] IF YOU GUYS ARE INTERESTED TO READ THEN VISIT MY WATTPAD ACCOUNT WATTPAD ID- shaperai22wattpad works-BROKEN ANGEL AND A WOUNDED PRINCE
-HIS WAYS!!THE RICHKING'S POSSESSION or THE BILLIONAIRE'S POSSESSION
Desolate Sequin -HER SHINNING KNIGHTEdited by shaperai22 - 9 years ago
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