|firefliesHaven|MaNan AT#54|'You and me are toxic' - Page 24

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Stana_Katic thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
what is the epi mo. when nandini falls on manik for the first time and they nearly kiss??
charminggenie thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: annboleyn



I will tell you what my dilemma is and would love some clarity. For a moment let's keep aside his dynamics with his parents and look at him objectively. He has a surrogate family in the form of fab 5 and they have been part of his life since a very young age. The group dynamics show him as a care giver and protector,also he has been in a relationship with Alya albeit convenient. But he is capable of extreme introspection,measure and vulnerability with them,and yet he is incapable of the same emotion with Nandu. His emotional stunting seems limited to Nandu and Nyonika. Why do they need to baby him when he is capable of so much more.
I don't know if that made sense


He is a protector and a self-desturctor,true . But whenever he is vulnerable , he shuts down and doesn't let fab5 heal him, they also let him be. They will camp outside his room but won't tell him or discuss his problem. Dhruv will go and play guitar and cool him down, but he won't push him to confess, realize and introspect. Alya as we see is too afraid to confront him. Mukti is like him, understands running away from issues, so she will happily play the ignorant card. With Cabir, he just finds something to make sure Cabir shuts up. So Manik , remains emotionally shunted.

He didn't understand Raghav or his love for Cabir too. For him because Raghav walked away , his love had no meaning. He underestimates Dhruv's strength or understanding.

But with Noyonika and Nandini it's different because these two women have the capability of hurting him. There is love , the kinds he always wanted.

While Noyonika made it all about give and take , conditional. So he is paying her back for whatever she did , by cutting her off and snubbing her always. So what to us seem a concerned Noyonika, Manik goes back to what happened and whatever she taught him. He refuses to think anything else, because that will give him hope , which has been shattered too often.

Nandini- he cannot do anything, he is frustrated because his usual modus operandi doesn't work with her. She pushes, berates him, hurts him yet she stays to care. That has never happened with him. Nobody has punched him , told him that he is wrong , yet stayed to sort him right. Fab5 has never called out on his wrong, they will rather stand with him and face punishment , rather than cornering , slapping and drilling sense. He can wrestle his way out with them, so he never gets to confront or hear a different version from them.

With Nandini he gets thrown off from his usual self, she unsettles him, never lets him to sulk or ride his Manik Malhotra train. She is his contradiction, hence the stunting.

I tried, Doc , will let others add more😳
Edited by charminggenie - 10 years ago
-MKB- thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
I reas her posts too Medhu
And I lou her not being modest , like "I rock and i know it" types 😎
Maisus posts are pyaar...though she does not post anymore

-MKB- thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
You have done all th explaining genie 🤗
Manik and Nadu both can not do without each other bas!
Sexpot thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
@genie and you thought I was marrying you for your money.
His lack of insight about Raghav walking away is a very valid point. He is not able to grasp the complexity of that situation and he disregards and disses Raghav too quickly. Excellent point!
But why is he not curious that she is hovering,caring,berating and being territorial with him and simultaneously giving him mixed signals.
Bira might be the answer..the toxicity is borne out of his arrogance and stupidity and her extreme vulnerability with regards to him.
I wish he introspects and stops projecting
13thwish thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
@Doc:Welcome back.. you were missed🤗
Although you chose the perfect time to take a break, this place was a mess last week..
Always open to an orgy, the more the merrier I believe😉
Glad to see you switching your loyalties over to Ayaz.. he is a far safer bet.. both IQ and personality wise😛😛😛

@Genie: Nyonika is a huge factor definitely since she is the first female influence in his life but it's not in the once bitten twice shy sense.. because even before the incident two years ago, he and Nyonika had a very clearly defined relationship.. it's always been a barter system between them.. And so he doesn't but her concern because she has never demonstrated freely and to no purpose.. It is she who made the rules for them and now he doesn't acknowledge or trust in anything outside that..

With Nandu his equation is very different.. he KNOWS that it is not give and take between them.. he even knows her care and concern is genuine.. he is not doubting that.. it is the 'why' of it all that baffles him.. the idea of undemanding, unconditional care/love is incomprehensible to him..
With the Fab5 yes, there is attachment and loyalty beyond proscribed limits but again they are a defined relationship.. they are his 'friends'.. friendship is unconditional, free of self interest ergo his equation with them makes sense..
But what is his relationship with Nandu? She says she doesn't want to 'be' with him and yet the care still stands? It is this gap in word and action that is tripping him.. he even says it.. you are contradicting yourself... your words and actions don't match.. and in such a scenario being a man of action himself, he believes that to be a more effective parameter to draw a conclusion from.. therefore he registers her 'action' of walking away while tuning out her words because they simply don't fit in his world view for now..

It's like this.. if someone spoke a sentence in chinese at you, you would hear it but not register it.. because without meaning and context our brain cannot process any information..

Which is why, whatever action Nandu takes now to demonstrate her point will turn the tide of their equation and get them out of this stalemate...
Medha.S thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: BoxedIn

Doc! 🤗

I was always here, you were off vacationing, and now twittering I assume. :(
I've been having the same problem with Manik, Doc. The complete and utter shutdown, the lack of introspection. But then today I realised, he is emotionally stunted, as you said, and a spoilt stubborn brat on top of it, and he's gonna understand nothing until Nandini shakes him hard, holds him by the ear, and points it out to him. All he can do by himself is throw a royal tantrum and throw his limbs around. Bas. Gadha4Ever.

Medha, it is IMPOSSIBLE to separate Bira and you now,okay? You fill in the blanks that his voice is forced to leave in a 20 minute show. And you do it so beautifully, I fall in love with him all over again.


It feels like ages since I received some Momma Doc love and awesomeness!
The AT feels like home after so long due to all of you back here, doing what you do, giving me such deep and intense feels! <3
All you Baes with your beautiful words i can't even!

OMG! iBlush -so HARD!☺️
charminggenie thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Haha MKB - yeah thats the truth , sooner we get that everything will make sense. When we say they are ying-yand, the missing piecies to one soul- then there interactions and need for each other makes so much sense.
Individually they will grow but together is important for their sanity and survival. Strong Nandu will always need an encouraging,instigating Manik and a calmer,mature him will always rely on her voice, this is how they will grow to be better individuals.

Let Doc know I tried getting her question sorted. 😆
sourmisery thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: charminggenie


He is a protector and a self-desturctor,true . But whenever he is vulnerable , he shuts down and doesn't let fab5 heal him, they also let him be. They will camp outside his room but won't tell him or discuss his problem. Dhruv will go and play guitar and cool him down, but he won't push him to confess, realize and introspect. Alya as we see is too afraid to confront him. Mukti is like him, understands running away from issues, so she will happily play the ignorant card. With Cabir, he just finds something to make sure Cabir shuts up. So Manik , remains emotionally shunted.

He didn't understand Raghav or his love for Cabir too. For him because Raghav walked away , his love had no meaning. He underestimates Dhruv's strength or understanding.

But with Noyonika and Nandini it's different because these two women have the capability of hurting him. There is love , the kinds he always wanted.

While Noyonika made it all about give and take , conditional. So he is paying her back for whatever she did , by cutting her off and snubbing her always. So what to us seem a concerned Noyonika, Manik goes back to what happened and whatever she taught him. He refuses to think anything else, because that will give him hope , which has been shattered too often.

Nandini- he cannot do anything, he is frustrated because his usual modus operandi doesn't work with her. She pushes, berates him, hurts him yet she stays to care. That has never happened with him. Nobody has punched him , told him that he is wrong , yet stayed to sort him right. Fab5 has never called out on his wrong, they will rather stand with him and face punishment , rather than cornering , slapping and drilling sense. He can wrestle his way out with them, so he never gets to confront or hear a different version from them.

With Nandini he gets thrown off from his usual self, she unsettles him, never lets him to sulk or ride his Manik Malhotra train. She is his contradiction, hence the stunting.

I tried, Doc , will let others add more😳



The way I see it, Nyonika and Nandini are the "outsiders" for him. With the Fab5, he knows that it's his duty to introspect and not let his natural egoistic instincts get the better of him. The thing with Manik is that it's hard to judge him objectively when it comes relations or equations. With Nyonika and Nandini he's all like, "here are two women who I wanted with me but they left me for whatever reason. So I'm done with them. I'm done caring for them or chasing them or thinking before acting with them lest I end up hurting them." This is what I perceived from his reactions in his encounters with two of them. He has already made peace with the "fact" that Nyonika only wants the worst from him or that there's always a motive in her actions. She meets him for some reason and never as a mother looking out for her child. He was putting Nandini in the same category as well. That she only wants things from him without giving him anything he needs. His foolishness but it's him we are discussing.

Plus, unlike Fab5, he can't completely sever ties with the two of them as well. Fab5 and music are his sanity, he has to work to keep them intact. Nyonika and Nandini are his fated, in the role of a mother and a role of someone to whom his red string is tied to. He can't run away from them. He knows he has to face them. But that doesn't mean he owes them any understanding or maturity, not when they left him in his most vulnerable time. Hence his cold, childish reactions with the two of them. It's his way of rebelling against things he can't control.
CheckYesJuliet thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: charminggenie


He is a protector and a self-desturctor,true . But whenever he is vulnerable , he shuts down and doesn't let fab5 heal him, they also let him be. They will camp outside his room but won't tell him or discuss his problem. Dhruv will go and play guitar and cool him down, but he won't push him to confess, realize and introspect. Alya as we see is too afraid to confront him. Mukti is like him, understands running away from issues, so she will happily play the ignorant card. With Cabir, he just finds something to make sure Cabir shuts up. So Manik , remains emotionally shunted.

He didn't understand Raghav or his love for Cabir too. For him because Raghav walked away , his love had no meaning. He underestimates Dhruv's strength or understanding.

But with Noyonika and Nandini it's different because these two women have the capability of hurting him. There is love , the kinds he always wanted.

While Noyonika made it all about give and take , conditional. So he is paying her back for whatever she did , by cutting her off and snubbing her always. So what to us seem a concerned Noyonika, Manik goes back to what happened and whatever she taught him. He refuses to think anything else, because that will give him hope , which has been shattered too often.

Nandini- he cannot do anything, he is frustrated because his usual modus operandi doesn't work with her. She pushes, berates him, hurts him yet she stays to care. That has never happened with him. Nobody has punched him , told him that he is wrong , yet stayed to sort him right. Fab5 has never called out on his wrong, they will rather stand with him and face punishment , rather than cornering , slapping and drilling sense. He can wrestle his way out with them, so he never gets to confront or hear a different version from them.

With Nandini he gets thrown off from his usual self, she unsettles him, never lets him to sulk or ride his Manik Malhotra train. She is his contradiction, hence the stunting.

I tried, Doc , will let others add more😳


So accurate 👏

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