CHAPTER 96 --Written by Shabs
Sidharh had to go into the office for an important meeting after breakfast. ..but the thought of being away from Roshni made him sad. It was if he needed her at all times to survive. .She was his oxygen
"Kaise din katega...Kaise jee paunga tere bina" Sidharh sulked as he walked hand in hand with Roshni to his car
"I wish I had the answer. ...because I'll be feeling the same way. .Jaan"
He wanted to be with her all the time. ..He didn't want to be away from her for even a second. .
Sidharh kissed her on the forehead, before he sat in the car
He rolled down his car windiw
"Don't go anywhere Baby. .just stay home okay. You know Dev is roaming around free. ...so please for me, for my sake... be careful"
"Stop worrying Sidharth. I'm not going anywhere. Now you concentrate on your meeting. I love you"
"I love you too. .."
He blew her a flying kiss, and Roshni bid farewell. ..as he drove away.
Sadness overcame her as she watched the car disappear.
Roshni sat down on the sofa and picked up a magazine and flicked through the pages. .. but her thoughts wondered back to the night before.
She wanted to be in his arms again. ..those protective arms. ..that gave her warmth and love. ...she began to blush at her own thoughts as she tapped her forehead...
"I'm missing you already Jaan" she said coyly. ."
Just then her mobile rang
"Hello. ...yes. ..yes. ..okay. .okay I'm coming" Roshni said as she ran out of the house. .
KHURANA BUILDING
The morning turned slowly into afternoon, and the meeting finally wrapped up.
Sidharth quickly pulled out his mobile and dialled Roshni number, tapping his fingers on his desk. ..He had missed her so much
"The number you have dialled is not available at the moment"
He redialled a couple of times, but received the same message
"Damn...Yeh meri biwi bhi nah. Zaroor kitchen mein busy ho gi.."
Sidharth picked up Roshni picture and kissed it...
Picking up his mobile again he dialled another number
"Yes Arjun. .I want you too arrange visas for my wife and I for Switzerland. ..and make it fast...I want to leave ASAP"
Sidharth disconnected the phone and smiled
"Our Honeymoon is long overdue my love...can't wait. Just you and me Baby...no one else..no interuptions. .no family" he chirped...
He sat and wondered for a while, and decided he would go home early and give Roshni a surprise ..
KHURANA MANSION
Sidharth walked into the hallway, and his eyes began to search for Roshni
"Where are you Baby. .."
"Hey Bro. .home so early. .." asked Rahul
"Ahhh...Yes. ..There was nothing important to do ...so I came home" Sidharth replied as his eyes continued to scan for Roshni
"Looking for someone" teased Rahul
"Obviously...and since your asking where is the love of my life...my dreamgirl. ..my jaaneman..my Roshni"
'No idea Bro. I haven't seen her since breakfast"
"Hmm...Maybe she's upstairs. .." he thought, he said as he made his way towards the staircase.
"Arre Sid your home early" Simmi said as she approached him
"How was the meeting...are you hungry...tea coffee"
"Mom ..Mom. ..I'm fine. ..where's Roshni"
Simmi looked at him
"Can't stay a minute without her. ..well my son you'll just have to be patient. ..she went out about three hours ago"
Sidharth stared at his mother,
"What do you mean she went out"
"Yeh lo. ...hindi mein bhullu kya. ..bahar gayye hai ..tu bhi nah Sid"
Sidharth pulled out his mobile and rang her once again
"The number you have dialled is currently non reachable"
"Damn it...Mom how could you so careless. You know that Roshni life is in danger. How could you let her go out alone"
Simmi shocked at his sudden outburst looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. .
"Relax Sid. ...I'm sure she's fine. .." Simmi answered
He quickly dialled her number again, his head swimming in drastic thoughts. His mouth had become dry, as he tensed up.
His limbs felt as if they would give way any minute, as horrible thoughts looped around his mind.
Time began to drag by...
Sidharth paced up and down the hall, constantly calling Roshni. But it was no use, her phone was non reachable
"Relax Bro. .." Rahul tried to calm his nerves
"I told her. ..I specifically told her not to leave the house. She knows Dev is out there... But still. She never listens!!!!"
Sidharth was loosing his mind "where are you Baby"
The hours passed, and with each passing minute it was breaking him. His mind played games with him...
"what if..."
He desperately tried to push those negative thoughts away...trying to keep his eyes dry and his mind focused
Three hour had passed, when Roshni finally walked in with Kritika
Sidharth face lit up and ran to hug her. ..
"OMG. ..OMG...Where have you been... I was worried sick"
"Sidharth relax. I went shopping with Kri. .."
Sidharth stepped back, and suddenly Sidharth smile turned cold
"Shopping! . ...Shopping!. .."
Roshni nodded her head innocently.
Sidharth shook his head and closed his eyes in disbelief.
"I dont believe this. Have you any idea what you put me through. ..any idea at all" he yelled suddenly
Roshni jumped at his sudden outburst and looked at him confused
"Sidharth woh mein. ."
"Does it even matter to you, the Hell you put me through in the last few hours. .."
"I have been trying to call you, I texted you. ..but you didn't have the courtesy to call back"
"Sidharth woh. ..."
"Woh kya Roshni...Woh kya...
You know when I couldn't get in touch with you, millions of thoughts raced through my mind. I thought something had happened to you...I thought Dev. .. "
His tone became harsher still
"Do you know how much I was hurting... How much pain I was in...not knowing where you were"
"Sidharth I was just shopping. ." She tried to reason
"Shopping..Exactly. You were just shopping!!!!!
Yahaan meri jaan ja rahi thi and you were just Shopping. Did it ever occur to you that you should let me know. ..."
"Woh actually" but her sentence was cut short
"Go on...go ahead make an excuse. ..." he said sarcastically
"You know Roshni kasoor mere hai. ..maybe I'm the crazy one. Caring about you...worrying about you. But you. ..you don't give a damn about me. .." he slammed his wrist against the table...
"Sidharth stop over reacting. ..I was with Kri. .."
"Yeah right. ..If Dev had come along then Kri would have saved you right"
He paced up and down...trying to get a grip on the sudden surge in his anger
"Aaahhh" he shouted angrily as he threw a vase onto the floor...
Everyone was shocked by his anger, especially Roshni, She had never seen this side of him. .
"Why didn't you pick up the blo**dy phone...
I left about 200 messages, but you...you didn't bother replying to even one. ..how can you be so careless Roshni. .."
"Sid" Kri tried to intervene, but Sidharth raised his hand to stop her
"This is between me and my wife..."
Turning back to Roshni
"I'm waiting. ...I want an answer right now. ...why can't you frea***ing get it into your head that your life is in danger. .Dev is out there. He has made two attempts on your life..."
Roshni looked around the room, as everyone in the household stood dumbfounded.
"You enjoy watching me suffer kya. ..you get some sort of kick out of it Roshni. Sidharth ko tarpane mein maaza aata tumhe"
Sidharth face had now turned red...He was losing his self control...
Again the family all gasped as they heard his angry voice. .
"Answer me damn it. ...answer me. ..what will it take to get it in your head that I worry about you..."
Roshni tried to speak, but the words wouldn't come out
"These last three hours. ..I died a million times scared frightened that maybe something happened to you"
"I'm sorry Sidharth. ..I didn't mean..."
Again her sentence was cut short as Sidharth laughed out loud
"Sorry. ...Sorry. ...seriously. ..that's all you have to say. Every time you simply say sorry...and me being the stupid crazy fool that I am, just melts away at your words. Bewakoof hoon nah...Sorry bolti hai" he sighed angrily
"Well...I'm sorry to for the day I laid eyes on you in Paris. I wish you'd be never came into my life...at least I would have been spared the stress you cause me every damn day..There's been nothing but tears since the day you entered my life...me and my stupid emotions .." his tone was so cold, she felt her heart freeze.
"Wha..." she looked at him in shock. She couldn't believe the words he had just uttered. Her whole life, within moments fell apart
"Every freaking day...I have to worry about you...your safety. ..and I'm fed up. ..I'm fed up. I curse the day you entered my life..." his anger was fogging his logical thinking..and the words poured out like bullets hitting Roshni in the heart
Tears welled up in her eyes.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for ruining your life Sidharth. ..I thought you loved me. .I had no idea... I was a burden on you" she spoke painfully as she closed her eyes.
"Sid Yeh tum kya bhol reh ho. ...are you even listening to yourself" scolded Simmi
Sidharth last words suddenly echoed in his ears. He just realised what he had said.
He stood numb. He was frozen. His breathing became ragged and he felt he would colopse any moment
He looked up at Roshni, as tears rolled uncontrollably down her cheeks. .Hurt and sadness evident on her face. Her eyes lower to the floor
"R. ..R. ..Roshni. .I..I..."
A few hours ago both were so happy. ..was that all a lie.
What happened to him all of a sudden. .."
Roshni turned and ran from there into Kritika room, followed by Kritika
Sidharth stood frozen...as his words kept echoing in his ears
"Oh. ...God. ..Oh God...yeh. ..yeh. ..maine kya keh diya. .." his eyes filed with tears as he ran after her.
He banged hard on Kritika door
"Roshni. ...Roshni. ..."
But she did not respond. ...He continued bashing the door until Kritika opened the door
"Sid she doesn't want to talk to you right now. .."
Sidharth ignored her words and barged into the room.
He quietly walked towards her, where she was cuddled with herself, curled into a small ball...weeping continuously...on the couch
He silently took his place beside her, kneeling down on his knees. He was hesitant. He did not know what to say. .how he would console her
"Roshni" he called her name as a mere whisper, but just loud enough for her to hear
"Go away Sidharth. ...just go away" she shrieked in between her sobs
Sidharth took a deep breath...
"I...I...didn't mean those words Roshni. ..I didn't. You have to believe me ...you know how much I love you"
"Do you Sidharth. .."
"Of course I do. ..I love you more than anything in this world"
"If you loved me then you would have never wished that I had never came into your life. .."
"Aisa nahin hai Baby. ...you are the most precious thing in my life. I love you more than anything else in this world ..I can't live without you Roshni..."
He tried to hold her hand, but she jerked it away
"D...D...don't touch me..." she said trying to back away into the couch, as much as she could
Those three words felt like death sentence to him. His heart pained...and it shattered into a million pieces.
He sat there staring at her numb, not knowing what to say or do...
He so wanted to go near her...to hold her and have him in his arms. Hug her tight. He wanted to touch her.. kiss her...and beg for forgiveness
Taking a deep sigh...
"Daant lo. ..oonchi awaaz mein gaaliyon do. ..but please Roshni forgive me. ..Please Roshni. ..I didn't mean it"
Roshni continued to cry. Seeing her in that vulnerable state hurt him. ..He had to make everything okay. .
"Don't cry Baby. ...Your tears hurt me" he whispered painfully
"Why do you care. You are the reason for my tears" she accused him. He knew she was right.
"I do care...I do care Baby. .I was just so scared. I was frightened. I thought I'd lost you. .."
He wiped away her tears "I didn't mean to take out my frustration on you. Believe me Baby"
"Jhoot. ...Jhoot. ..." she cried
Sidharth shook his head, "No Baby no...I love you"
"Was this a prank..." she asked suddenly
Sidharth looked at her confused...as tears rolled down his eyes
"P. ...P...prank...matlab"
"This was all a prank nah. ..The biggest prank of all...saying that you loved me...playing with my feelings right Cranky Pants"
"Roshni. .no. ...no. .."
He tried to hold her hand...but Roshni jerked away his hand and ran into the bathroom. Locking herself in..
"Just leave me alone Sidharh. .."
Sidharth was not one to give up that easily. He walked towards the bathroom door, abd rested his head against it..As he knocked it hard
"Roshni. ...Roshni... please...I'm sorry...I'm sorry" but there was no response from Roshni
"Roshni. ...I didn't mean it...I love you more than anything else in my life...you are my life Roshni. You have to forgive me..."
"Leave Mr alone Sidharth. ...leave me alone" she sobbed
"Roshni. ...Please... Roshni I..I ...didn't mean it. You have to believe me"
Sidharth stood waiting for her response. ...but all he could hear were her low sobs...
"Give her time...Let Roshni sleep here with me tonight Sid ..I'll talk to her" begged Kritka.
Sidharth nodded his head reluctantly, wiping away his uncontrollable tears
"Take care of her...I'll come back later. ..just tell her I'm sorry please...tell her I'm sorry" as he walked away
He cursed himself for the pain he had just caused his Roshni..
SIDNI BEDROOM
Sidharth sat at the edge of the bed. ..He pulled his hair in frustration, as his heart beat insanely.
Tears streamed down his face.
He walked up and down the room. ..
"What did I do. ..how could I say that. .." He slammed his fist against the wall, hurting his knuckles..
He took out his mobile and messaged her
"I love you Roshni more than anything else in this world. Your the best thing that's ever happened to me. ..You are my life. ..I didn't mean what I said...You know that. I'm a stupid fool. . Please forgive my love. ..Please forgive me
Love you Hamesha"
He sent the send button, and waited for her reply that never came. ..
The night faded away, but sleep was far from Sidharth eyes. ..
His only thoughts were of Roshni and how much he must of hurt her with his words. .
NEXT MORNING
The birds began singing, as the dawn broke. ...He had not slept all night
Sidharth got up...determined
"Whatever it takes my love, aaj Tumhe mana ke rahoon ga. ..I won't let you stay away from me any longer. ."
