I’ve often been accused of being shy and sheltered. Seeing the world as if everything and everyone was as sweet as chashni. It’s surprising how quick people are to point out that the world is bitter and I am blind. It’s not my fault if I lived my whole life in my Babuji’s sweet shop!
He nurtured me with kindness and wisdom, imparting key knowledge to one and all. Lucknow was my home, where I met my closest friends. When someone looks at me they think “Oh, she’s so happy!”. That’s not true. In reality I’ve been a companion to tears and cries. Of humiliation and rage.
But believing in goodness above all, I am resolved to solve everything with sweetness. Aakhir kya karu? It’s elemental to who I am. And I am not ashamed of looking at the world with a bit more hope and courage than most people.
Especially Diabetic Singh Raizada.
I would never point out his health condition - in fact I’m rather sympathetic to it. I have spent hours studying what sugarfree is, but the thing is Karela Raizada simply knows how to break my heart every moment. From the first time I met him he ran away from me as if I’m poison.
Maybe I am. Considering my bubbliness and sweetness, it doesn’t take a genius to understand that he has complicated emotions in his heart. I remember Di saying there’s something about me that reminds him of childhood. And I know he hasn’t had a good one.
I think my gripe with Mr. Raizada comes from the fact that I’m irrevocably drawn to him. I had concluded that men like him have no space in my life but when I learned he’s also from Lucknow, has a softer side to him and actually doesn’t mind my presence in his house - rather looks forward to it - I couldn’t help but melt.
Who wouldn’t? It’s Arnav. And Devi Maiyya ki kasam he’s blessed with a beautiful face.
Talking about melting, I sometimes had the urge to melt Shyam Manohar Jha in a pot of boiling oil. That man! I always felt something was wrong about him when he touched me as if I was his own. Who gives him the right to hold me like that? To attempt to learn my secrets? I tried warning those close to me that something was wrong with this man who claimed to love me, when it looked like he was trying to get into people’s good books.
I still remember the first time I was in Shantivan. Arnav Singh Raizada had glared at me from the other end of the living room but tell me - why couldn’t take his eyes off me? Also, if I may overshare my dear friends, I think he smells me before he sees me. I see his nose twitch, a hint of smile on his shapely lips as he recognizes my fragrance before he quickly dons his mask - yes a mask! - of akduness.
Now that I'm in the mood to overshare, I lost myself the first time I touched his lips. I believe he was in a haze, a bit unwell - so I won’t count it as anything romantic.
What will count is when I saw him on New Year’s Eve, face silhouetted between the curtains, skin glowing by the fairylights. Still, my most favourite moment that I count as rather romantic was post marriage. I was alone with him in his cabin and he stared at me - contemplating something.
It was cold in the office but I couldn’t have felt hotter. Slowly, he pulled me closer to him, eyes dark in temptation. I was left speechless. I had thought after the wedding he would absolutely abhor me but no, here he was, taking every single risk - the curtains were still open!
Oh my Devi Maiyya, anyone could see us in his office.
But he didn’t care. I felt it was a temptation he was willing to cross regardless of the risk. And I lost my capability of functioning. There were so many more words left to exchange - like first of all, why didn’t Kadwa Raizada ever confess that he has a fondness for me? One can’t go from avoidance to indulgence at once!
But then this is Arnav. I wouldn’t be the one to stop him if he looked at me with his hooded eyes. I closed mine as he took me into a sinful, luscious kiss. A deep breath left me, as if we’d be waiting for this for ages.
Oh, he bites!
“Aap?” We froze. Scandalised. His wife of six months and my best friend caught us red handed. My juices were on his hands and lips - evidence of our crimes. Khushi smiled, with the fondness of one who realised what longing did to someone, and shyly chuckled that she would have made me - Jalebi - meet Arnav more frequently if she had only known Arnav liked me too.
As a sweet dish I had many friends, but none like Khushi Kumari Gupta. She was a part of my soul and I, hers. Hence it was no surprise we both loved the same man too. However, my friendship to Khushi rivalled my love for Arnav. If his mistake of reciprocating his affections for me - once - brought a smile on Khushi’s lips, I’d gladly be in this one sided relationship till the end of my life.
And surprisingly what started as unrequited love ended as friendship with Khatta Raizada. He had asked me - YES ME - tips for making sweets. Would I call myself evil for misguiding him and letting him create a horrible jaleba for Khushi?
Jaleba was a terrible creation. But much like Khushi and her ability to love anyone, she kissed Jaleba with sweetness. His bitter, burnt crisp edges didn’t hide the fact that somehow he was sweet on the inside.
I am never going to be Jaleba’s friend - if you ask me he belongs in the dustbin. But I am jealous of his ability to close an argument between Khushi and Arnav. There is something in him… I agree.
Perhaps as Payal had once said about Arnav to Khushi, Jaleba might not be who I think he is.
Wait, wasn’t this supposed to be about Arnav and my love for him? Then why am I mentioning Jaleba so much? That oddly shaped creature with no taste nor eye for art! No, I feel nothing for him. We have absolutely no relationship.
Devi Maiyya ki kasam, I’d change my name before I call Jaleba a sweet dish.
Even if Khushi fondly spoke about him the next day.
“Oh wow Khushi-ji! This is Nannav’s jaleba? How romantic.” NK - my best friend - sighed as he had the audacity of putting me and Jaleba on the same plate.
“Isn’t it cute Nanhe-ji?” Khushi smiled.
“It is Khushi ji, it’s like Jalebi and Jaleba are made for each other!” NK grinned.
Jaleba and I stared at each other, horrified. We looked away, vowing to never consider the other under a romantic light. I knew his heart was for Khushi - he was only made for her. And my heart was with my Arnav.
However, dare I admit I felt something pop on my crispy skin like it's not the hot oil. Nor would I admit I spent the rest of the day hidden in the bottom layer of the chasni pot, I wouldn't - and couldn't - look at Jaleba in the eyes after that comment.
Until Khushi forgot me in the chashni pot and Arnav dropped Jaleba here too - hoping he'd learn some sweetness.
"Hey," I jumped at his voice. He sounded like Arnav? Coated in chashni I admitted against my belief that we're... similar. He's made of the same thing as me. Except I had a different upbringing than him.
Jaleba looked away as the chashni made my skin translucent. And like a gentleman, he pushed more of the sweet syrup towards me and stood at the other end of the pot.
Hey hey.... Meetha Ve... heyyyyyy....Meetha Ve.... ooooo.... oh Meetha Ve...
OH MY DEVI FREAKING MAIYYA
– – –
Jalebi ko hai pasand mithaai,
Par Jaleba ko meetha na lubhaai,
Kya inn dono ke raaste kabhi ek ho payenge?
Jaan ne ke liye dekhiye, Iss Meethe Ko Kya Chashni Doon?
Only on Halwa Plus!
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A/N: To everyone on this ridiculous ride, thank you so much for reading this! What's your take on Jalebi and Jaleba's "Tu Hi Bata Mere Maula" or "Kyun Dard Hai Itna?" - I'd love to read it! And who do you think would be the rest of the characters of IMKKCD?
Also this is dedicated to the dearest Ruchi Ji. So sorry that der ho gayi, par der hi sahi, iss OS ko aana toh tha hi.
Thank you A for being the first to read and giving me feedback - you're amazing.
Best,
- S
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