First attempt to an OS: Just another evening at RM

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Darling Devyani

Posted: 9 years ago
#1

Hi everyone just thought will add some thoughts... This is my first attempt to write a story ever... Please let me know whether this story telling is any good... In comparison with the kind of beautifully narrated stories I have read in this forum I do not think this is anywhere near but yes it is a sincere attempt, inspired by that great show IPKKND...



"Aarav! Aarav where the hell are you" boomed the Laad Governor from the top of the staircase at RM.

A typical evening at the house of the eccentric Raizadas. Payal , Khushi in the kitchen giving final touches to the dinner dishes with sisterly gossip and giggles.

All the rest in the living room huddled in disjoint groups of a variety of activities...

Mamiji engrossed in some tv show NK hovering by her side with his tooti phooti Hindi commentary.

Anjali, Naniji discussing the proceedings from the latest satsang.

Akaash and mamaji discussing the issues for an important client presentation tomorrow.

ASR dealing with his infinite deals poring over his lap top till he tried to snatch his phone to call the ever invisible Aman...

And Aarav...

Well where was Aarav?

Out from his den the lion had roared, all attention shifted to the top of the staircase...

"Ka baat hai chotey? Yeh aap ka daftar nahin hai, tameez se batyayiye !" Naniji said sternly.

In the kitchen a worried Payal said to Khushi "Khushi deko na kya hua, Arnavji gusse me lag rahe hein"

"Aarav kahan ho tum ? I am warning you come here right now!" Everyone looked at the growling, glowering ASR .

"Chotey kya hua ? Kya kiya hai Aarav ne?," Anjali asked with a questioning glance...

"Di he has disappeared with my phone, I have an important con call in a few minutes now! Khushi !! where is he?" Arnav turned to Khushi who had just arrived at the scene.

"Arnavji hum to pichele ek ghante se khana bana rahe hain, Aarav apne kamre me ischool ke project par kaam kar raha tha, aadhe gante ke pehle jab hum use kuch anaar dane khilane gaye the.." said she.

" Ghar ka baccha gayab hoing and ma and maasi bhaat u doing?" said mamiji glaring at her two bahus.

"Mano, abhi baat ka batangad banana shuru mat karo. Bitwa, Aarav yahin ghar me kahin hai , chalo dekthe hai" mamaji said balancing his wife's random throw of daggers at her daughter's in law and also patting the ruffled feathers of his favorite nephew with a smile.

The search within the house ended with everyone worried and anxious... For Aarav seemed to have disappeared...

Khushi had a suspicious look on her face which was immediately spotted by Arnav.. "What is it Khushi? Kya use kuch problem tha? Did he say anything?"

"Nahin woh Aarav kuch naya khel ke bare me bol raha tha, humne teek se suna nahi, hum amma se bhi phone pe baat kar rahe the.. haa magar kuch pakad ne ki baat kar raha tha" said a puzzled looking Khushi...

"Tum kuch bhi teek se sun sakthi ho? Pata nahin dimag kahan pe lekar ghoom thi ho, aur aarav bhi jelabi, laddoo kha kha khar bilkul tumari tarah sanki ho gaya hai, jaisi ma waisa beta" muttered the angry ASR.

"Han han, hamara hi beta hai, kam se kam aap ki tarah bewajah kaan naak se gusse ka dua to nahi nikalta hai usse har choti baat par. Ghar ke bahar to is waqt wo nahi jayega, yehin pe hoga" a very sensible Khushi retorted back.

"Nannav, Khushiji... stop! the subject is Aarav okay not nannavs gussa nor khushijis khanak oops sanak ! Lets think where did he possibly go ? Khushiji where would Aarav go ?think think... raat hai there is nowhere he could possibly go!" NK assured...

"nanhe ji!" shouted a thrilled Khushi. "wahin to keha raha tha Aarav... Kuch GO ke bare mein... Doondna hai kuch walkman nahin, bokman..."

"Pokeman GO " Akaash chipped in... "Oh so he is hunting pokemons with your mobile bhai" Akaash said wondering at the plight of the mighty ASR at home...

Now the search continued... But this time in the closets, in the pool, on top of the trees in the garden till Aarav came running amidst the crowd screaming "Yippe found him found him!!!!!"

He stopped midway looking guiltily at his whole family glaring at him...

"Sorry mom, dad.. Sorry everyone.. I got a bit carried away and went out in the garden then finally in the garage. Dad I am sorry" said Aarav bowing down his head...

Outbursts from everyone for the next ten minutes... A total commotion with all the loony Raizadas shouting and coddling their prince all at once...

After which...

A smiling Arnav first to disappear back to his room with his phone not before fondly ruffling his son's hair a fond kiss to his beloved wife's neck leaving her sputtering...

Most of the Raizada's cleverly pretending not to have noticed this blatant public display of affection...

Except perhaps Akaash who has his mouth hanging open...

Payal with a silent blush...

NK dazed and amazed at this ever bickering couple as always...

Mamaji loudly clearing his throat and saying " chalo sab andar chale?"

Naniji and Di exchanging smiles and once again thankful to the almighty for blessing their chotey with joys and worries of "normal everyday life "...

And mamiji "Hello hi bye bye ! Time for my new serial! Bahus... gets me my diet salad dinnerwa ke pehele jaldi" and rushing back to tv...

Aarav finding his basket ball lying about, bouncing it around in the house deaf to all protests like any other child and back to his play...

HP, OP and co returning with a "phew" to their remaining chores...

Laxmiji bleating about hovering behind Khushi and Payal in prospect of some interesting food being offered...

An end to a typical evening at RM...

Just normal life...

But very precious...

Edited by Deeksha11 - 9 years ago

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Deeksha11 thumbnail
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Darling Devyani

Posted: 9 years ago
#2
thanks guys !!!!!!!!! like HP and OP "phew" !!! something readable came out from me finally !!!!!!!!!!😊
Posted: 9 years ago
#3
Such a sweet OS! You have got the essence of all the characters and blended them together really well. One can easily visualise an evening exactly like this in RM. You tell a good story :)
Arilip thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#4
Mazza aa Gaya !!!!!!
Would like to read more from where it came😊

shruti46 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#5
What a perfect evening at RM..
Chaos,panic,shouting,placating ..
And Pokemin Go ..obviously the new madness these days .
archnahardik123 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#6
This was really sweet. This is totally mad house.
fanipkknd0 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#7
Hey, you first attempt was superb. Looking forward to few more. 👏👏
jnfrjnfr thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#8
That was a cute one...
Surely we wish them back soon...like a dream come true...
kirti98 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#9
Very nice ly written..could imagine it fully.👏
SaiSreePN thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#10
Perfect raizada's craziness enjoyed it

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