Yes...I'm ASR

Yes I am ASR...

I had a very taunting past. Whoever I had loved and trusted, left me. I was on my own with my disabled sis who was my one and only anchor. I lived for her. I never enjoyed life. All I did was working hard to set up an empire so that no one dares to point fingers at my family. I knew at a young age that money is very very important and it controls the world. Along with me grew my ego which was as big as my empire.
Then I met a girl in such circumstances that I doubted her honesty. I never trusted anyone in my life, forget about this girl. She pointed each and every mistake of mine, which I never wanted to hear. But I knew inside, that I'm slowly changing. I hated it and its frustrating when ur heart and mind says two exactly different things.

I vented out my frustration on her on each time we met. I knew there was some conection between us. Its the pain. That was the difference between La and khushi. La also loved me, took care of me, but khushi could understand my pain. coz she also has gone through the same circumstances. The inner turmoil was frustrating. One side there was La who was exactly "my type" girl. Classy with modern outlook and she loves me. On the other, there was this girl, who has everything
I dislike, but she understood my pain just like my sis. The way I can't see her in tears, she also couldn't bear my pain.

I realized that I'm not doing good with La. But still I had to overcome my Ego for such a girl. Believe me, it is not easy. All my life I hated such people and then to bow down in front of them... I wanted her to be happy. i could do anything for that. Her eyes still had that fear when I go near her and I hated it. I knew that she cares for me, but my Ego didn't let me tell her my feeling. But then there came the moment, the moment I thought I lost her, came the realization that love is bigger than my Ego.

But once again I was thrown into same phase. Phase of betrayal. This time my sister's life was involved. Two persons whom i've trusted the most were playing games against me and my sis. Do you think I'm a fool? I was angry on myself for letting her reach my heart. It hurts, yes it hurts badly. Even if she is innocent, why didn't she tell me about him? She was playing with my sis's life. Will she do the same with her sis's life?

I don't have time to think. I have to do something now, otherwise I won't be able to save my sister. The only way is to avoid them, Jijaji and Khishi, getting together and plotting something else. I just want to keep my sis happy till the baby is born. After that she will have someone else in her life to live for and Khushi can do whatever she wants with her life. I know that she doesn't love me. But for the time being, I think only about my sis. I knew that Khushi was like me, will do anything for her sister. So I emotionally blackmailed her. I know it hurts her, but this is her sazza, for betraying my sis and then me.
And now, we both are going through the same pain. Pain of betrayal...


Regards,
Sudha.