Day 730
Do as we say, or your life will actually be taken away from you.
My Zoya. My Life.
I read this message every single day. Every breath I took, would be in payment to Zoya for the debt of my actions and for the love she had bestowed on me. She stood by me, with me, in my place, when no one else did. She did this even when I didn't believe in myself. My hands painted red, I thought I had done the unthinkable and she didn't flinch for a second The thought never crossed her mind, that it had been me who had done it. And in the moment she needed me most, I had to go against her.
I was lost deep in thought but, it was broken when I heard my assistant saying, "Sir, your meeting is commencing in 5 minutes." I mumbled under my breath and ushered her out with my hand movements saying I would be there shortly.
This was me now. I oozed confidence when meeting clients and making deals but the second I gained solidarity, I was lost. This had been my routine and I hoped for it to change. It had been 2 years now. I was still hoping.
Do as I say, and you can free your life.
My Aditya. My Life.
I thought of that one night, every living moment. Each living second, I thought of what could have happened and what had happened. Aditya had broken me and I had left yet, this action made me feel incomplete rather than fulfilled. There had to be something more. He could not have done this.
With tears threatening to fall from the oceans that already been cleared, I heard my assistant halting this as she said, "Miss, your next client is here." I nodded and she left.
This was me now. I put up a facade for the world and crumbled when I was on my own. Catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I see his eyes. His golden-brown eyes, spoke to me rather than the words he had uttered. There was something more but I stopped myself that night knowing, I would find the reason. It had been 2 years now. I was still waiting.
Day 731
I walked into the little shop that had unknowingly, changed my life in seconds. The last time I was here, I had encountered my true love, for the first time. Oh, how we had fought for that gift that was meant for the people we thought we were going to spend an eternity with. Instead, that gift pulled us together in a journey, that was meant for eternity.
"I need more beer if we walk around for another hour said a voice, that rung in my head sounding familiar. As I looked up, my heart beat made its way up to my throat as the heat rushed to my head. I was going to find the reason.
"Zoya? exclaimed Nani.
I stood staring at her. Furious and upset at the same time. With my stare boring into her, she looked down as if she felt threatened. Her failure to make eye contact, spoke to me as if there was guilt. As she slowly made her way towards me, I felt my body freeze as if icicles were pinning me to the ground and piercing my skin.
"Look Zoya, Aditya was my pawn that night and I made him say whatever he did okay? Stop looking at me as if you're going to eat me she said nearly shouting. Her statement kept me grounded or else I would have stepped back with the smell of strong alcohol hitting my face. Staring at her, I felt myself experience every emotion I had felt for the past 2 years. I finally found the reason.
Day 732
"Stop running Zoya! I can't catch you! She ran further, smiling as she did with her hair flowing back. As she ran her Mangalsutra fell, and I quickly caught it before it fell to the ground. Smiling and looking at it in my hand, I looked back up to see she was nowhere to be found. "Zoya? I started pacing, then sprinting, but she was nowhere. I felt the world beneath me crumble and my chest close in...
"Zoya! I woke nearly screaming, with sweat dripping from my forehead and my heart beating outside my chest. It was another day but the same nightmare. As I tried to bring my hands to my face to wipe my tears, I was stopped. I looked down and saw my world in my hands. I found hope.
Her eyes looked into mine as if they were filling themselves with emotions that had drowned. Her face was pale, nose red from, and face marked with tears. I was the cause for this. I looked at her, up and down almost commending myself, that I had remembered every little detail of her. This must be a dream, so I reached out to touch her cheeks, the same cheeks that had made my heart skip a beat. They were real. Her face sunk into my hands, trying to find warmth as if it had been frozen.
My voice trembled as I asked, "Zoya, how?
The expressions in his eyes. The nightmare he had woken from. I needed no further explanation. The little cracks in his voice as he spoke caused the walls within me to break. My ears that yearned for the music that was his voice, were now ringing. My body that yearned for the medicine that was his touch, was now healed. My voice would not leave me to reach him as the floods of tears drowned me.
Seeing her crumble by my side, it took me no time to reach down and grab her into my arms. I held to my angel, as if she would be gone once again if I let go.
His hug was bone crushing yet the softness, and fright, reached me too. I pulled back and confusion rushed to his eyes making them dark, and then they turned black with fear.
Zoya finally spoke saying, "I found the reason. Why you did what you did. I'm... and I stopped her, before she can utter the words my ears could not bear to hear.
Aditya cried saying "You did nothing. I tried to protect you but I broke you... and I stopped him this time, before he can utter the words that would break my heart once again.
I found hope.
We swam in to oceans of each other's eyes. Making up for the 2 years we had drowned.
We traced each other's faces. Making up for the 2 years we had lost our art.
We felt peace in each other's embrace. Making up for the 2 years we had been in hell.
We kissed each other's lips. Making up for more than the 2 years, we had not.
We said I love you to each other. Making up for the 2 years, we had not said in person but, had always felt because our love was Bepannah.
And,
We said a final goodbye to our pasts that had separated us, making up for the eternity that lies ahead.
Day Bepannah.
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